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Girlfriends lover 😈
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My girlfriend has a male lover off FAB we have met together and several times on her own.
When she returns I ask if she has had a good evening and she replies he is amazing.
When I have asked do you love him she says yes but not as much as you.
She has said she would like to go away with him for a long weekend to a nice hotel spa and he wines, dines and makes love to her all weekend.
What are your thoughts on this scenario ? |
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"My girlfriend has a male lover off FAB we have met together and several times on her own.
When she returns I ask if she has had a good evening and she replies he is amazing.
When I have asked do you love him she says yes but not as much as you.
She has said she would like to go away with him for a long weekend to a nice hotel spa and he wines, dines and makes love to her all weekend.
What are your thoughts on this scenario ?"
that's gone too far. That's not reasonable IMO, but depends how you feel about it all? |
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By *asha86Couple 37 weeks ago
walsall |
I don't think it matters what others thoughts are it's down to whether you feel comfortable in that situation and to express how you feel about it to your partner as you are the ones having to live with the decisions xT |
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If it works for you both and isn’t gonna put your relationship at risk then it’s fine.
We couldn’t even contemplate separate room stuff!  & no interest in feelings for others.
But we’ve done similar to what you’re doing with other partners. |
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Id never choose any of this but it's no one else's business but your two selves. Dont be letting the WWW guide you.
My view is it's a car crash of your own design.
You get to pick the speed and enjoy the view.
Good luck. |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………"
Do you ever go away for weekends together? |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together? "
Most weekends |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends "
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? "
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought."
I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't.
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought.
I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't.
"
Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought.
I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't.
Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries "
Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her...
Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings... |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought.
I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't.
Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries
Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her...
Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings..."
Wise words and we do discuss both our feelings in depth tbh. Guess we like to push the envelope a little more than most |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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"Id never choose any of this but it's no one else's business but your two selves. Dont be letting the WWW guide you.
My view is it's a car crash of your own design.
You get to pick the speed and enjoy the view.
Wise 7words x
Good luck."
|
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought."
Does she like you having your own freedom if the shoe was on the other foot what would her reaction be |
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?
She admits it would be hard for her to accept but what’s good for the goose …………
Do you ever go away for weekends together?
Most weekends
What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend?
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought.
I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't.
Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries
Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her...
Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings..."
Totally agree seems a little one sided... |
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"Id never choose any of this but it's no one else's business but your two selves. Dont be letting the WWW guide you.
My view is it's a car crash of your own design.
You get to pick the speed and enjoy the view.
Good luck."
I won’t be guided by the www I just wanted to see what other’s opinions were x |
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By *vaRoseWoman 36 weeks ago
Ankh-Morpork |
Sounds to me like she’s poly. Are you op? If not are you ok to be the monogamous partner to a polyamorous girlfriend?
Personally I don’t like the hierarchy of loving one more than the other but I’m going to give the benefit of the doubt here that this is new to you all and older monogamous societal expectations are in play here.
Love is love. It’s not a finite resource. Her loving someone else doesn’t mean that there’s less love for you. It’s not a pizza that now has to be shared.
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"Sounds to me like she’s poly. Are you op? If not are you ok to be the monogamous partner to a polyamorous girlfriend?
Personally I don’t like the hierarchy of loving one more than the other but I’m going to give the benefit of the doubt here that this is new to you all and older monogamous societal expectations are in play here.
Love is love. It’s not a finite resource. Her loving someone else doesn’t mean that there’s less love for you. It’s not a pizza that now has to be shared.
"
Yes we are both poly and I’m happy for her to love another guy but I never share my pizza 😉
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"My wife has several lovers like this that she loves. We have an open marriage and are both very happy"
She has a few lovers also and we have a 100% honesty policy between us which works for us too |
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So she lives with you, shares the bills and running of the house and she has a lover for the extra sex and affection she needs, 🤪 What could possibly go wrong during a weekend of romance with him 🤪🤪 |
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"So she lives with you, shares the bills and running of the house and she has a lover for the extra sex and affection she needs, 🤪 What could possibly go wrong during a weekend of romance with him 🤪🤪"
Wrong on every count !
But feel free to assume you know all and understand our dynamic  |
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"
I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us.
Do you mean you trust her not to leave you for the other man she loves, or something else ?"
I trust her to tell me anything
If she wanted to leave she would leave regardless
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"Is there a possibility she is hinting at you to try and stop her? Perhaps she wants you to show how much you care by saying "no" once in a while?"
I am her boyfriend not her owner, why would I assume if I said no she shouldn’t go ? |
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"My girlfriend has a male lover off FAB we have met together and several times on her own.
When she returns I ask if she has had a good evening and she replies he is amazing.
When I have asked do you love him she says yes but not as much as you.
So if 99% of the people questioned said yes do it and you wasnt happy
would you let her do it ??
She has said she would like to go away with him for a long weekend to a nice hotel spa and he wines, dines and makes love to her all weekend.
What are your thoughts on this scenario ?"
|
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Ruth has a b/f of whom she is very fond. I have met the guy many times. They occasionally go away for a weekend together and it works very well for us. It is entirely possible to love more than one person at the time, it’s not exclusive. I am confident enough in our primary relationship that she will always come back but if she chose not to and chose him over me then that is where she should be. Who am I to get in the way of her happiness? If her feelings for him were stronger than for us then it would not work if I tried to hold her back. |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided.
I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too. |
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided.
I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too. "
I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided.
I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too.
I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing "
And weirdly enough i didn't say for him to go and meet others for sex.
I said for him to go out and enjoy himself with weekends away too, that could be with anyone he chooses. |
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"Ruth has a b/f of whom she is very fond. I have met the guy many times. They occasionally go away for a weekend together and it works very well for us. It is entirely possible to love more than one person at the time, it’s not exclusive. I am confident enough in our primary relationship that she will always come back but if she chose not to and chose him over me then that is where she should be. Who am I to get in the way of her happiness? If her feelings for him were stronger than for us then it would not work if I tried to hold her back. "
Hooray !!!!!!!
Someone that gets it 😊 |
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided.
I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too.
I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing
And weirdly enough i didn't say for him to go and meet others for sex.
I said for him to go out and enjoy himself with weekends away too, that could be with anyone he chooses. "
I can assure you I do everything in life I want to, I’m really lucky and if I wasn’t happy I’d change it |
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I’m not sure what you’re looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision?
Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If you’re all happy and nobody’s getting hurt, go for it 
Mrs TMN x |
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"I’m not sure what you’re looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision?
Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If you’re all happy and nobody’s getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x"
Not heard of enm
Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario
Am I wrong to post ?
Seems there’s interest in the subject
Thanks for your input x |
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"I’m not sure what you’re looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision?
Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If you’re all happy and nobody’s getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x
Not heard of enm
Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario
Am I wrong to post ?
Seems there’s interest in the subject
Thanks for your input x"
No of course you’re not wrong to post, just wondered what difference other people’s opinions would make to you. ENM means ethically non monogamous. |
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"I’m not sure what you’re looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision?
Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If you’re all happy and nobody’s getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x
Not heard of enm
Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario
Am I wrong to post ?
Seems there’s interest in the subject
Thanks for your input x
No of course you’re not wrong to post, just wondered what difference other people’s opinions would make to you. ENM means ethically non monogamous. "
Other peoples opinions will make no difference to me whatsoever tbh
I’m 62 have everything I want in life and I don’t mean monitory things
Yes I’ve googled enm, probably sums us up
Who knew were ENM 😂 |
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"You have a great profile and the photos on it suggest you have a fun, fantastic lifestyle. Only you two will know if there’s any jeopardy in the relationship with the third."
There’s a risk in everything we do in life and we are fully aware of them
We enjoy pushing our limits together and the different motions that come with it
Thanks for the compliments x |
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