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How many poly people on here?
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We have been poly from the start of our relationship. Started as a polycule of 2 men and 3 women and then went to a regular couple for a while and now we are 2 men and 1 woman.
Swinging is less of a jump for us but it does mean we look for exceptional cases because we already have a lot going on.
Just out of curiousity how many poly folk are on here? |
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We thought we would see some people popping up ☺️.
Polly consent is the easy part it's finding the right fella that's the trick. K has an old friend and old flame as her other bf. I've had consent for another bi bf for years but finding the right guy has been impossible 😁 |
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I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.)"
I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do ! |
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Poly is a lot of time management and understanding that you aren't owed anyone's time. When K is talking to the other I find things to do.
At one point I had two gf's and one bf and it was exhausting. The problem was too much new relationship energy (a common poly term) to manage. K and I have been together nearly 10 years so a new stream of NRE to manage is easy. It's the new lad that's terrified that he's doing something wrong. We are relaxed as hell. |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do ! "
We need to get fab to add the cuddle date function! |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do !
We need to get fab to add the cuddle date function! "
🫂 |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do !
We need to get fab to add the cuddle date function! "
Cuddle dates sound ace! |
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Seriously if you can get someone try one!
I had a friend who wasn't interested in dating for a relationship but missed cuddling into someone's chest with a silly film on. I offered to do just that (first film was Love Actually around Christmas) and it was great. She did specify that she liked hands on her boobs over the clothes but that's just practical hugging it didn't feel sexual just comfortable.
We did it a lot until she met her now husband ☺️ |
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By *ooleyMan 6 weeks ago
preston |
"...(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.)..."
Is it bad etiquette on a cuddle date to have a nap?
'Cos I'd be napping. |
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Although I didn’t know the language at the time, I would have been considered poly when I was married as I was also dating someone else. My partner was dating someone else as well, but my husband never did find the right person.
I still consider myself poly even though I’m single. |
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"Although I didn’t know the language at the time, I would have been considered poly when I was married as I was also dating someone else. My partner was dating someone else as well, but my husband never did find the right person.
I still consider myself poly even though I’m single. "
You are still poly if you are single. It's a mindset not a relationship status. Often one partner will find another partner before the other. In a way that's a good thing establishing the new change before another occurs.
It can be a very human thing to see a partner happy and having the attention of more than one person and thinking "when am I going to experience that?!". Generally you just deal with it and enjoy having your whole time to focus on one partner, maybe with a bit of swinging thrown in. I gave a massage to a friend before while his gf was on a date with her other bf. It certainly took the edge off.
Find the right person... Yeah that's the trick. |
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"Oh we fell asleep a few times 😁
I get so paranoid I’d snore 😂 "
Oh we did lol. Thankfully neither of us were trying to sleep or it would've been ear plugs time. When it was her I was able to reposition myself (she was cuddled into me) and she stopped. |
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By *eliWoman 5 weeks ago
. |
"I don't know if I'm poly. Never dated two or more people at the same time. I'm down for the cuddle date. It's a brilliant idea. 👍🏾😊"
Right? Cuddle dates are cute. 🥰
I didn't realise I was poly until seven/eight years ago. The main things are - could you have romantic feelings for more than one person at a time?
And the next - is it ethical for everyone? As an example - if I was dating someone and my partner didn't know - not polyamory. Or if I was dating someone and their partner didn't know - not polyamory.
Feelings and ethical? Yep, that's good old poly. 🩷 |
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"I don't know if I'm poly. Never dated two or more people at the same time. I'm down for the cuddle date. It's a brilliant idea. 👍🏾😊
Right? Cuddle dates are cute. 🥰
I didn't realise I was poly until seven/eight years ago. The main things are - could you have romantic feelings for more than one person at a time?
And the next - is it ethical for everyone? As an example - if I was dating someone and my partner didn't know - not polyamory. Or if I was dating someone and their partner didn't know - not polyamory.
Feelings and ethical? Yep, that's good old poly. 🩷"
I think I understand. As long as everyone knows what's going on and is comfortable with it.
Anyone available for a cuddle date? |
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"Although I didn’t know the language at the time, I would have been considered poly when I was married as I was also dating someone else. My partner was dating someone else as well, but my husband never did find the right person.
I still consider myself poly even though I’m single.
You are still poly if you are single. It's a mindset not a relationship status. Often one partner will find another partner before the other. In a way that's a good thing establishing the new change before another occurs.
It can be a very human thing to see a partner happy and having the attention of more than one person and thinking "when am I going to experience that?!". Generally you just deal with it and enjoy having your whole time to focus on one partner, maybe with a bit of swinging thrown in. I gave a massage to a friend before while his gf was on a date with her other bf. It certainly took the edge off.
Find the right person... Yeah that's the trick."
I've learned a whole new language since my relationships broke down. We were instinctively doing some things right and it worked for us at the time but I can see where it could have been better. I'm definitely seeing better levels of communication than I've experienced before and has made me dona lot of thinking about my wants and needs. |
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"I'd like my wife to have boyfriends. She's just got to take that step. "
Just tell her that the door is open and let her take her time. K was 8 years between second boyfriends. It happens when it happens. |
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"Although I didn’t know the language at the time, I would have been considered poly when I was married as I was also dating someone else. My partner was dating someone else as well, but my husband never did find the right person.
I still consider myself poly even though I’m single.
You are still poly if you are single. It's a mindset not a relationship status. Often one partner will find another partner before the other. In a way that's a good thing establishing the new change before another occurs.
It can be a very human thing to see a partner happy and having the attention of more than one person and thinking "when am I going to experience that?!". Generally you just deal with it and enjoy having your whole time to focus on one partner, maybe with a bit of swinging thrown in. I gave a massage to a friend before while his gf was on a date with her other bf. It certainly took the edge off.
Find the right person... Yeah that's the trick.
I've learned a whole new language since my relationships broke down. We were instinctively doing some things right and it worked for us at the time but I can see where it could have been better. I'm definitely seeing better levels of communication than I've experienced before and has made me dona lot of thinking about my wants and needs."
Yeah my first stint of being a "hub" I really didn't do well at. Three partners, one nesting, one casual and another casual but looking to be very serious. Couldn't manage expectations for one and the other turned out to be a bit of knob when it came to dependency and I should have told him earlier. I have to own that I didn't communicate well enough though. |
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Our fantasy (because realistically we know its near impossible). Another couple, all poly and happy to cuddle up watching a film, playing games and chilling. If it lead to more thats okay too but not a primary goal. Friends 1st that can be intimate too. |
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"Would love to be mfm poly but we wouldn’t want friends and family knowing so would love to find it discreetly x"
I imagine that's the hardest part for all about a poly (as opposed to a convenient FWB dynamic). A lot of masking something that's kinda a big part of life. Sucks.
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I was in a poly relationship for just over two years with a bi couple when I was younger. I’ve since tried, for years, to persuade my wife to find a boyfriend but she isn’t keen so I’ve sadly dropped that now. |
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By *rolicUsCouple 5 days ago
Worth travelling to |
We are poly. Only realised last year. DOH.
Neither have other partners currently, I’m just recovering from being unethically polyed (ie betrayed) by my former partner who sadly didn’t seem to get it.
So pretty 💔but we move 💪🏻 and a cuddle date sounds just what I need permanently at the moment!
High fiiiiive Borat style to fellow poly  friends. It can feel quite isolating and a sense of community is lovely. |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do !
We need to get fab to add the cuddle date function!
Cuddle dates sound ace! "
I could work with that, cuddle date is just what I need, I miss the closeness of my late partner  |
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"I explained Fab to a poly friend and they said "cool, can you get a cuddle date on Fab". I had to admit that was probably not easy to find.
(For the non poly folk reading a cuddle date is pretty much what it suggests. You are going out specifically to end up cuddled up on the sofa watching a film or something. Sex isn't impossible but mostly it's about comfort and closeness.) I wouldn't describe myself as poly (I can just about manage one actual relationship 😂) but this I can do ! "
I'll cuddle with you any day  |
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By *uts123Man 2 days ago
Nr Ipswich |
I used to cuddle date with an ex girlfriend once our sexual relationship ended whilst I was dating a new partner. Both knew about each other and were comfortable with the situation.
Sadly this ended as the ex girlfriend found a new partner who wasn’t happy about the cuddle dating as he couldn’t understand the dynamic. |
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