FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you actually looking for a spark, or just used to being bored?
Are you actually looking for a spark, or just used to being bored?
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By *aturn6 OP Man 7 hours ago
cardiff |
I’ll admit it, I’ve been a dribbler. I’ve sent those low-effort messages just to see if anyone was actually there. I was just adding to the noise.
I see the trap now.
Men act like zombies because they expect to be blanked. Women blank everyone because they’re fed up with the garbage in their inbox. It’s a loop that keeps everyone stuck.
If you’ve decided every man is exactly the same, you’re the one keeping the static going. By treating every message like it's trash, you're filtering out the exceptions because you’re too busy being pissed off at the fakes.
You’re literally creating the boredom you’re complaining about. I’m done with the scripts and putting an x at the end of every sentence. I can be both a gentleman who understands respect and a primal animal once the door is locked. Most people are too stuck in the script to handle that duality.
I'm not here to complain or ask for a chance. My ego isn't in this. I’ve just overhauled my profile to reflect a real frequency instead of a numbers game.
Is anyone actually looking for a disruption, or have you all just gotten used to being bored? |
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Great stuff O.P. I like your approach to taking things head on and in your own way.
I for one was sick to death long ago of the men who ask for help with meets and the absolute trash and hoops that people tell them they have to jump through.
I don't like your profile.... ( seeing as you asked ) |
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If the message can be read without us opening the message it would be deleted.
If we can’t read it all then we’d look at the profile first and if that doesn’t appeal we’d delete the message.
There’s no steadfast rule as to what works with getting a response - other than be hot (to us)…😛 but no effort/bland/crude/rude messages will just get deleted.
K |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 6 hours ago
cardiff |
If you think this is a gender thing, you’re missing the bigger picture. I’m putting the burden on us as humans. This has nothing to do with biology, I’m questioning the status quo we’re all fed every day.
It goes way beyond this site. We’ve honestly lost our humanity in the noise and the scripts we follow. I’m not here to blame anyone; I’m here to question why we’ve all settled for being categories instead of people. |
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"Why did this read like something Morpheus out of the Matrix would say.
Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real?
What if you couldn't wake from that dream?"
Do you think that's air your breathing? 😂👍 |
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"If you think this is a gender thing, you’re missing the bigger picture. I’m putting the burden on us as humans. This has nothing to do with biology, I’m questioning the status quo we’re all fed every day.
It goes way beyond this site. We’ve honestly lost our humanity in the noise and the scripts we follow. I’m not here to blame anyone; I’m here to question why we’ve all settled for being categories instead of people."
If you're making a broader point, why did you focus on men sending shit messages, women deleting shit messages, and this being women's fault somehow? |
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It’s like everything in life …. You’ll get out of it what you put in !!
Put effort into reading profiles and seeing if you have similar interests etc then compose a well thought out individual message, if you don’t get a reply then that speaks for itself and clearly you aren’t matched, just stay positive … move on, I seen on another thread somebody say if it’s having a negative impact on you or your self confidence or self worth then take a break and come back refreshed, which is great advice. |
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"Why did this read like something Morpheus out of the Matrix would say.
Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real?
What if you couldn't wake from that dream?
Do you think that's air your breathing? 😂👍"
This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 6 hours ago
cardiff |
I used those examples because they’re the symptoms we all deal with every day on here.
You can’t talk about the state of the machine without pointing to the gears that are grinding.
I’m not saying it’s 'women’s fault' any more than I’m saying it’s 'men’s fault.' I’m saying the system has us all playing these roles where we aren't even people anymore.
Men act like zombies because they're ignored, and women act like filters because they're overwhelmed.
That’s the loop. If we only talk about the symptoms, we never address the cause. The cause is that we’ve lost the ability to see a human being through the screen.
If you want to keep making this about who's at fault, that’s your choice. I’m more interested in who’s actually ready to step out of the cycle and act like a human again. |
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"If you think this is a gender thing, you’re missing the bigger picture. I’m putting the burden on us as humans. This has nothing to do with biology, I’m questioning the status quo we’re all fed every day.
It goes way beyond this site. We’ve honestly lost our humanity in the noise and the scripts we follow. I’m not here to blame anyone; I’m here to question why we’ve all settled for being categories instead of people."
I buy that argument; of course we're all individuals with some interesting bits and worth (some definitely more than others but I'm not here to judge).
I think your profile lays it on a bit thick though, and your use of the word disruptor maybe puts a lot of people off. Most of us like a quiet, even predictable life, not a disrupted one. |
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"I used those examples because they’re the symptoms we all deal with every day on here.
You can’t talk about the state of the machine without pointing to the gears that are grinding.
I’m not saying it’s 'women’s fault' any more than I’m saying it’s 'men’s fault.' I’m saying the system has us all playing these roles where we aren't even people anymore.
Men act like zombies because they're ignored, and women act like filters because they're overwhelmed.
That’s the loop. If we only talk about the symptoms, we never address the cause. The cause is that we’ve lost the ability to see a human being through the screen.
If you want to keep making this about who's at fault, that’s your choice. I’m more interested in who’s actually ready to step out of the cycle and act like a human again."
I get lots of messages from said zombies but also quite a lot from actual humans who I engage with so I guess they are out there |
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Not sure I would have r armed it for n the way you did OP but I think I get your point. I think there is so much fake now and so much choice that we hide 'us' and use routines just to drown out the noise. I've believed for a long time that you have to at least talk to someone to at least even be vaguely interested. On here, it's almost like tinder. Regardless of any originality, if it's not in my routine why should I bother |
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"Why did this read like something Morpheus out of the Matrix would say.
Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real?
What if you couldn't wake from that dream?
Do you think that's air your breathing? 😂👍
This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back"
Stop trying to hit me and hit me |
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"I used those examples because they’re the symptoms we all deal with every day on here.
You can’t talk about the state of the machine without pointing to the gears that are grinding.
I’m not saying it’s 'women’s fault' any more than I’m saying it’s 'men’s fault.' I’m saying the system has us all playing these roles where we aren't even people anymore.
Men act like zombies because they're ignored, and women act like filters because they're overwhelmed.
That’s the loop. If we only talk about the symptoms, we never address the cause. The cause is that we’ve lost the ability to see a human being through the screen.
If you want to keep making this about who's at fault, that’s your choice. I’m more interested in who’s actually ready to step out of the cycle and act like a human again."
If you use the quote and reply button, it'll make it easier to know who you're replying to.
I'm just trying to work out what on earth you're on about. And working from what you wrote.
What I'm getting is "what if we take a standard complaint about messages on Fab, and desperately try to apply some sort of deep meaning to it?"
Or "give me a chance, even though I think an x is effort" plus ✨ sparkle ✨ |
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"I used those examples because they’re the symptoms we all deal with every day on here.
You can’t talk about the state of the machine without pointing to the gears that are grinding.
I’m not saying it’s 'women’s fault' any more than I’m saying it’s 'men’s fault.' I’m saying the system has us all playing these roles where we aren't even people anymore.
Men act like zombies because they're ignored, and women act like filters because they're overwhelmed.
That’s the loop. If we only talk about the symptoms, we never address the cause. The cause is that we’ve lost the ability to see a human being through the screen.
If you want to keep making this about who's at fault, that’s your choice. I’m more interested in who’s actually ready to step out of the cycle and act like a human again."
I think you're assuming way to much about how other people use the site...
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Not sure I would have formed it in the way you did OP but I think I get your point. I think there is so much fake now and so much choice that we hide 'us' and use routines just to drown out the noise. I've believed for a long time that you have to at least talk to someone to at least even be vaguely interested. On here, it's almost like tinder. Regardless of any originality, if it's not in my routine why should I bother |
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O.P. you are right but what you might not realise is that you are somewhat late to the party.
To the majority of people here it is not news.
It's just that you've arrived at that point yourself in this moment....... we've been there for a long time. |
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"Man send crap. Women ignore crap.
That’s it. "
But what if answering crap is the answer to disrupting our global malaise?
What if taking a chance on wuu2 and a slightly nauseating dick pic might overcome the human condition?
*Dr Who Music* |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 6 hours ago
cardiff |
If the only way you can process a man having an original thought is by comparing him to a movie character, you’re proving my point about the scripts It’s easier to turn me into a meme than it is to actually look at the status quo.
I’m not here to offer you a red pill. I’m just a guy who’s bored of the static. If you’re happy in the simulation, enjoy the noise. If not, you know where to find the anomaly. |
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"Man send crap. Women ignore crap.
That’s it.
But what if answering crap is the answer to disrupting our global malaise?
What if taking a chance on wuu2 and a slightly nauseating dick pic might overcome the human condition?
*Dr Who Music*"
TL:DR
Wuu2? |
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"If the only way you can process a man having an original thought is by comparing him to a movie character, you’re proving my point about the scripts It’s easier to turn me into a meme than it is to actually look at the status quo.
I’m not here to offer you a red pill. I’m just a guy who’s bored of the static. If you’re happy in the simulation, enjoy the noise. If not, you know where to find the anomaly. "
Ah, so the only way to escape the condition of malaise you've described, to be Truly Special and Enlightened, is to meet someone who describes themselves as being above that. Got it.
Personally I've got too much self respect for that thinly veiled self promotion. |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 6 hours ago
cardiff |
"If the only way you can process a man having an original thought is by comparing him to a movie character, you’re proving my point about the scripts It’s easier to turn me into a meme than it is to actually look at the status quo.
I’m not here to offer you a red pill. I’m just a guy who’s bored of the static. If you’re happy in the simulation, enjoy the noise. If not, you know where to find the anomaly.
Ah, so the only way to escape the condition of malaise you've described, to be Truly Special and Enlightened, is to meet someone who describes themselves as being above that. Got it.
Personally I've got too much self respect for that thinly veiled self promotion."
Calling this 'self-promotion' is just a way to avoid the point.
I’m not a guru and I’m not enlightened. I’m just a guy who decided to stop acting like a bot. If you think having a real opinion is just a move, you’re proving exactly what I said about us losing our humanity.
My self-respect comes from being an actual human, not from playing along with the noise.
|
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"If the only way you can process a man having an original thought is by comparing him to a movie character, you’re proving my point about the scripts It’s easier to turn me into a meme than it is to actually look at the status quo.
I’m not here to offer you a red pill. I’m just a guy who’s bored of the static. If you’re happy in the simulation, enjoy the noise. If not, you know where to find the anomaly.
Ah, so the only way to escape the condition of malaise you've described, to be Truly Special and Enlightened, is to meet someone who describes themselves as being above that. Got it.
Personally I've got too much self respect for that thinly veiled self promotion.
Calling this 'self-promotion' is just a way to avoid the point.
I’m not a guru and I’m not enlightened. I’m just a guy who decided to stop acting like a bot. If you think having a real opinion is just a move, you’re proving exactly what I said about us losing our humanity.
My self-respect comes from being an actual human, not from playing along with the noise.
"
Did you... Did you run this response through ChatGPT? 😂 This has the cadence of ChatGPT.
This is a bold, entertaining strategy. |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation. "
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue. |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 6 hours ago
cardiff |
"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue."
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
 |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
"
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨ |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 5 hours ago
cardiff |
"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨"
This is my point here. I am being me. I am intensely spiritual and I always ask questions even if they cause discomfort. I’m unapologetically me. I don’t need a chat bot to write for me. I wrote songs, poetry, I have an incredibly deep mind to my own agony sometimes. |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨
This is my point here. I am being me. I am intensely spiritual and I always ask questions even if they cause discomfort. I’m unapologetically me. I don’t need a chat bot to write for me. I wrote songs, poetry, I have an incredibly deep mind to my own agony sometimes. "
I am also a writer. The last three or so years, I have taken steps to become aware of the cadence of LLMs and to avoid it in my writing. Even though they're valid techniques, the accusations of LLM use are toxic in the creative space. (They are less toxic here, although I'm personally uninterested in diluting my hope of human connection with someone who wants to mediate communication through a plagiarism machine).
It's a rare and surprising creative who hasn't made these changes, in response to the deluge of bilge and devaluing of our craft. |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
It feels like the fucking Twilight Zone 😂😂
Ive got just enough tin foil for a few more hats. Want one?
Please 🤞
Any chance of a nice wide brim ? "
Like a Brodie helmet? Or a bell? Do you want a tin foil bell-end? Cos I can do that. |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
It feels like the fucking Twilight Zone 😂😂
Ive got just enough tin foil for a few more hats. Want one?
Please 🤞
Any chance of a nice wide brim ?
Like a Brodie helmet? Or a bell? Do you want a tin foil bell-end? Cos I can do that."
Go full creative !
I’d cherish the tin foil bellend 🔔 ❤️ |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 5 hours ago
cardiff |
"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨
This is my point here. I am being me. I am intensely spiritual and I always ask questions even if they cause discomfort. I’m unapologetically me. I don’t need a chat bot to write for me. I wrote songs, poetry, I have an incredibly deep mind to my own agony sometimes.
I am also a writer. The last three or so years, I have taken steps to become aware of the cadence of LLMs and to avoid it in my writing. Even though they're valid techniques, the accusations of LLM use are toxic in the creative space. (They are less toxic here, although I'm personally uninterested in diluting my hope of human connection with someone who wants to mediate communication through a plagiarism machine).
It's a rare and surprising creative who hasn't made these changes, in response to the deluge of bilge and devaluing of our craft."
Profound. I could tell the friction was for a reason. To yourself, and anyone reading this in fact. My whole point, was don’t lose your humanity in a world that is build built on automation. My post was worded the way it was on purpose. It targeted the ones who can still think freely. 3 |
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"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨
This is my point here. I am being me. I am intensely spiritual and I always ask questions even if they cause discomfort. I’m unapologetically me. I don’t need a chat bot to write for me. I wrote songs, poetry, I have an incredibly deep mind to my own agony sometimes.
I am also a writer. The last three or so years, I have taken steps to become aware of the cadence of LLMs and to avoid it in my writing. Even though they're valid techniques, the accusations of LLM use are toxic in the creative space. (They are less toxic here, although I'm personally uninterested in diluting my hope of human connection with someone who wants to mediate communication through a plagiarism machine).
It's a rare and surprising creative who hasn't made these changes, in response to the deluge of bilge and devaluing of our craft.
Profound. I could tell the friction was for a reason. To yourself, and anyone reading this in fact. My whole point, was don’t lose your humanity in a world that is build built on automation. My post was worded the way it was on purpose. It targeted the ones who can still think freely. 3"
Christ almighty 🤣🤣🤣 |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 5 hours ago
cardiff |
"This all feels like a first rodeo situation.
Yeah, this is "give me a chance ladies" plus overwritten marketing hype plus... Attempts to allude to being special while overtly shunning the movie references that are so apparent. That's before the profile, which is a separate but related issue.
The fact that you can't imagine a man being honest without it being a 'marketing tactic' is the exact malaise I'm talking about. You’re so used to the noise that you’ve forgotten what a real person sounds like.
If calling me Morpheus or a salesman makes you feel better about the status quo, have at it. I’ve got a real life to get back to and I'm not here to convince you.
I'm out. Enjoy the loop.
Try being yourself, rather than asking a chatbot. It might get a better reception than pseudo-spiritual marketing babble. I'm looking to meet people, not chatbots, and I expect people to talk like people.
I will enjoy engaging with real people, ignoring crap messages, and looking down on LLM prose. ✨
This is my point here. I am being me. I am intensely spiritual and I always ask questions even if they cause discomfort. I’m unapologetically me. I don’t need a chat bot to write for me. I wrote songs, poetry, I have an incredibly deep mind to my own agony sometimes.
I am also a writer. The last three or so years, I have taken steps to become aware of the cadence of LLMs and to avoid it in my writing. Even though they're valid techniques, the accusations of LLM use are toxic in the creative space. (They are less toxic here, although I'm personally uninterested in diluting my hope of human connection with someone who wants to mediate communication through a plagiarism machine).
It's a rare and surprising creative who hasn't made these changes, in response to the deluge of bilge and devaluing of our craft.
Profound. I could tell the friction was for a reason. To yourself, and anyone reading this in fact. My whole point, was don’t lose your humanity in a world that is build built on automation. My post was worded the way it was on purpose. It targeted the ones who can still think freely. 3
Christ almighty 🤣🤣🤣"
What do you write? I love creatives! |
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"I thought I wasn't being subtle.
Maybe I should have been less subtle 🤭
Perhaps 😝 thank you for your replies, and your advice, I appreciate you ❤️"
Are you a gymnast? That was an impressive double backflip about face. Olympian.
Unlike chatbots, my memory storage doesn't end mid conversation, and I maintain consistency through by the simple act of being human. Or I have gradual changes of mind, not hallucinations or new incompatibile thoughts based on brand new prompts. |
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By *aturn6 OP Man 5 hours ago
cardiff |
"I thought I wasn't being subtle.
Maybe I should have been less subtle 🤭
Perhaps 😝 thank you for your replies, and your advice, I appreciate you ❤️
Are you a gymnast? That was an impressive double backflip about face. Olympian.
Unlike chatbots, my memory storage doesn't end mid conversation, and I maintain consistency through by the simple act of being human. Or I have gradual changes of mind, not hallucinations or new incompatibile thoughts based on brand new prompts."
I am not a robot as we have discussed, I have to live life too 😉 |
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"I thought I wasn't being subtle.
Maybe I should have been less subtle 🤭
Perhaps 😝 thank you for your replies, and your advice, I appreciate you ❤️
Are you a gymnast? That was an impressive double backflip about face. Olympian.
Unlike chatbots, my memory storage doesn't end mid conversation, and I maintain consistency through by the simple act of being human. Or I have gradual changes of mind, not hallucinations or new incompatibile thoughts based on brand new prompts.
I am not a robot as we have discussed, I have to live life too 😉"
*Sure Jan.gif* |
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By *ustBoWoman 4 hours ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I am not bored I don't have time to be bored. I ignore messages as I'm not meeting anyone new and chats tend to lead to expectations so it's better not to start chats. All this is stated on my profile. If people waste their time messaging that's on them.
I don't know what a no effort message is ,bar the faf ones.Apart from that I know it is hard to write a good first message as I have done it myself many a time.
As for looking for a spark well on here isn't that what everyone wants, that spark of excitement and anticipation when meeting someone.,be they someone new or someone whom you have been meeting for a while.
Fab is fab,life outside of here is just life. I'm no different I just tend to wear more clothes in my life outside of fab.
Trying to be philosophical about fab is a waste of time and energy.
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Even when I can't be arsed I've always made an effort and I expect effort in return.
There's a big difference between a conversation that is effortless and one that is lacking in effort.
I have too much self respect to allow fab dictate my mood or my level of interest.
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