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"Which one of you has left your dirty drawers on the bathroom floor?
My work is never done! Always picking up after you all 🙁
Told you not to take them off me and just leave them there  "
😂😂😂 In my haste to remove them from you it must have slipped my mind 🫢🫢 |
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"Which one of you has left your dirty drawers on the bathroom floor?
My work is never done! Always picking up after you all 🙁
Told you not to take them off me and just leave them there
😂😂😂 In my haste to remove them from you it must have slipped my mind 🫢🫢"
And in that haste you forgot to take the bins out  |
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"Which one of you has left your dirty drawers on the bathroom floor?
My work is never done! Always picking up after you all 🙁
Told you not to take them off me and just leave them there
😂😂😂 In my haste to remove them from you it must have slipped my mind 🫢🫢"
was it you using my socket set ? |
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" who the **** has been using my socket set... who ever it is. any clue to where the 19mm long reach has has gone.
Oh and ref the bins I have sorted them."
Good on you 👍🏻 I always get confused; is it recycling week? …Or else green waste?
Has anyone walked the dog? I would but me back is giving me grief…. |
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"Which one of you has left your dirty drawers on the bathroom floor?
My work is never done! Always picking up after you all 🙁
Told you not to take them off me and just leave them there
😂😂😂 In my haste to remove them from you it must have slipped my mind 🫢🫢
was it you using my socket set ?"
Ahhh…I may have inadvertently used it…but I thought I put them back fairly neatly…. 😵💫😵💫 |
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"Which one of you has left your dirty drawers on the bathroom floor?
My work is never done! Always picking up after you all 🙁
Told you not to take them off me and just leave them there
😂😂😂 In my haste to remove them from you it must have slipped my mind 🫢🫢
And in that haste you forgot to take the bins out "
Ah, fear not, Chilly sorted them out. He’s a good egg (just don’t touch his socket set…) 👍🏻👍🏻 |
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" who the **** has been using my socket set... who ever it is. any clue to where the 19mm long reach has has gone.
Oh and ref the bins I have sorted them.
Good on you 👍🏻 I always get confused; is it recycling week? …Or else green waste?
Has anyone walked the dog? I would but me back is giving me grief…."
about your dog I got a face full of freckles cutting the grass earlier...
Oh and by the way it's green waste week...
Have a word with your dog please . |
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" who the **** has been using my socket set... who ever it is. any clue to where the 19mm long reach has has gone.
Oh and ref the bins I have sorted them.
Good on you 👍🏻 I always get confused; is it recycling week? …Or else green waste?
Has anyone walked the dog? I would but me back is giving me grief….
about your dog I got a face full of freckles cutting the grass earlier...
Oh and by the way it's green waste week...
Have a word with your dog please ."
😂😂 The pooch has been crapping out there again? Whose turn was it to clean it up? I did it last month so I’m in the clear… 😇 |
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"I'll be in my room with the door locked.
Whats thats buzzing noise i can hear from the landing 
Tommy, I think you've forgot to switch off your butt plug again! "
It not mine...someone has pinched the batteries AGAIN  |
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"I'll be in my room with the door locked.
Whats thats buzzing noise i can hear from the landing
Tommy, I think you've forgot to switch off your butt plug again! "
 Tommy's got a butt plug Tommy's got a butt plug |
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"I'll be in my room with the door locked.
Whats thats buzzing noise i can hear from the landing
Tommy, I think you've forgot to switch off your butt plug again!
Tommy's got a butt plug Tommy's got a butt plug "
Chillys got a mangina, chillys got a mangina |
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By *Effy-Woman 6 weeks ago
Scotland |
"I'll be in my room with the door locked.
Whats thats buzzing noise i can hear from the landing
Tommy, I think you've forgot to switch off your butt plug again!
It not mine...someone has pinched the batteries AGAIN "
Rechargeable is the way forward. |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
"
Erm that might not be food...
I would not drink it if I was you |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
Erm that might not be food...
I would not drink it if I was you "
Great Scott! I’ve just checked the date also: 21 Jan 2025 😱 Who’s turn is it to do the shopping? We need milk (urgently)
….oh and crisps as I’ve just eaten the last packet (dated best before 2024) |
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"I'll be in my room with the door locked.
Whats thats buzzing noise i can hear from the landing
Tommy, I think you've forgot to switch off your butt plug again!
Tommy's got a butt plug Tommy's got a butt plug
Chillys got a mangina, chillys got a mangina "
Erm about that thing you may of heard the other night but did not really hear ... she just likes to be Mr on Sundays...
I mean it sounded like it was my room ... I think it was just noise travelling down the landing ... or ghosts   |
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"Can we all cwtch up on the sofa, and watch the football tonight?
somebody has lost the remote ...
somebody is going to have to sit by the telly ... to turn it on "
Is thats where my batteries have gone? |
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By *Effy-Woman 6 weeks ago
Scotland |
"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬"
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food! |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food! "
Unless….. you’re first to the buffet 🤣 |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food! "
I always attach labels to my food but someone has deliberately removed them and stuck them on the microwave (and eaten my meals) 😭😭 |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food! "
Whys there wrappers off the cucumbers stacked outside your door then...told you before to clean up after yourself |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food!
I always attach labels to my food but someone has deliberately removed them and stuck them on the microwave (and eaten my meals) 😭😭"
you need to real that dog in its getting to clever for its own good ... |
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Hate to break it up you, but those fragrant 'herbs' growing on the windowsill aren't meant to go in your salad or on your pizza.
With that in mind, who has eaten the entire carrot cake from the fridge? |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food!
I always attach labels to my food but someone has deliberately removed them and stuck them on the microwave (and eaten my meals) 😭😭
you need to real that dog in its getting to clever for its own good ..."
I think I saw it also playing with your socket set earlier.
…and that ghastly smell…? That wasn’t me; it was the dog to 👍🏻👍🏻🫢 |
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"Chilly I found your 19mm socket, Tommy was using it as a but plug 🤦♀️
Only becauee you told me i had to!!!
Well you had left your other one on the landing buzzing away 🤷♀️"
So whos took the batteries?
Chillys dog? |
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"Jeez! Someone has been drinking out the milk bottle in the fridge; I can now see bits of food floating around in it!
That’s just not cool 🤬
The first rule of swinging - never ever touch the food!
I always attach labels to my food but someone has deliberately removed them and stuck them on the microwave (and eaten my meals) 😭😭
you need to real that dog in its getting to clever for its own good ...
I think I saw it also playing with your socket set earlier.
…and that ghastly smell…? That wasn’t me; it was the dog to 👍🏻👍🏻🫢"
don't worry I returned the favour , I put some nice healthy nutritional herbs of the window leader over its food earlier...
that should calm it down |
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"Who put an old sock in the kettle?
We've been filling it with the spout for years and so never noticed  "
That was me. The limescale filter fell out about 3 years ago and the sock was the closest thing to hand.... or foot as the case was. 🧦 |
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"Own up...
Which one of you leaves 2 squares of toilet paper on the roll so "I didnt use it all, i'm not changing it"
Chilly did it!!!
he who points ... declares the brown finger stitch up ...
"
Some people protest to much  |
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"Own up...
Which one of you leaves 2 squares of toilet paper on the roll so "I didnt use it all, i'm not changing it"
Chilly did it!!!
he who points ... declares the brown finger stitch up ...
Some people protest to much "
OK well since it's fess up time the miniature velocaraptor on your bedside table ... I made it out of a dog shit I found on the lawn... its sensuls fault for moving Satan in with us all, |
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"Own up...
Which one of you leaves 2 squares of toilet paper on the roll so "I didnt use it all, i'm not changing it"
Chilly did it!!!
he who points ... declares the brown finger stitch up ...
Some people protest to much
OK well since it's fess up time the miniature velocaraptor on your bedside table ... I made it out of a dog shit I found on the lawn... its sensuls fault for moving Satan in with us all, "
I thought that was _tanners tolberone  |
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By *Effy-Woman 6 weeks ago
Scotland |
"Hate to break it up you, but those fragrant 'herbs' growing on the windowsill aren't meant to go in your salad or on your pizza.
With that in mind, who has eaten the entire carrot cake from the fridge?"
I was wondering why I suddenly started to hear my heart pumping the blood around my body. |
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"How many of you in this house are presently using the internet?
My porn is buffering like a washing machine drum 🙁
My bad its all those online streams I need to do to pay my rent 😳"
Whats your page...."asking for a friend"  |
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"How many of you in this house are presently using the internet?
My porn is buffering like a washing machine drum 🙁
We’re about to make some of our own, we could do with an extra cock?"
I’m UP for it 😜👍🏻👍🏻 |
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"How many of you in this house are presently using the internet?
My porn is buffering like a washing machine drum 🙁
My bad its all those online streams I need to do to pay my rent 😳"
😍😍 It’s not a gaming channel right? 😈😈 |
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"Shhhh
Can you all be quiet
I'm taking a call on babestation
Taking a call?! 😳😂
A mans gotta do what a mans gotta do!!
I've been told I'm a total babe a few times "
Iv told you before and il tell you again...that comment doesnt count when its from your mum...or was it mine..oh i give up! Just dont be on the phone too long, its cut the dial up internet off and im trying to download some music on limewire!! |
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I know it was one of you lady tricksters.. Gillette mach 3 blades cost a Kings ransom...
and yes I realise they make your legs feel really soft n smooth..
But your gonna look really silly with a dildo super glued to the centre of your foreheads if it happens once more ... |
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" I know it was one of you lady tricksters.. Gillette mach 3 blades cost a Kings ransom...
and yes I realise they make your legs feel really soft n smooth..
But your gonna look really silly with a dildo super glued to the centre of your foreheads if it happens once more ..."
Erm are my batteries in that dildo  |
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"How many of you in this house are presently using the internet?
My porn is buffering like a washing machine drum 🙁
My bad its all those online streams I need to do to pay my rent 😳
😍😍 It’s not a gaming channel right? 😈😈"
I mean theres playing involved 😇 |
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"How many of you in this house are presently using the internet?
My porn is buffering like a washing machine drum 🙁
My bad its all those online streams I need to do to pay my rent 😳
😍😍 It’s not a gaming channel right? 😈😈
I mean theres playing involved 😇"
😍😍 |
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"How often are we supposed to feed the fish? I did it last month. Has anyone else done it? Are they supposed to float like that?
What fish? We dont have fish???
But…but what’s that in the sink? "
Nothing in the sink
It's just the stench from upstairs |
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"How often are we supposed to feed the fish? I did it last month. Has anyone else done it? Are they supposed to float like that?
What fish? We dont have fish???
But…but what’s that in the sink?
Nothing in the sink
It's just the stench from upstairs "
Told effy to at least open a window if shes shutting her bedroom door |
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"How often are we supposed to feed the fish? I did it last month. Has anyone else done it? Are they supposed to float like that?
What fish? We dont have fish???
But…but what’s that in the sink?
Nothing in the sink
It's just the stench from upstairs "
I’ve heard some strange and ungodly noises from the flat above us. It’s the Virus Section apparently…. |
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"Will you please open the window or at least spray something when you’ve been for a shit, it’s like walking into a brick wall when I go in there.
Sorry "
Whatever you had for breakfast is barred from this house, even my eyes were watering 💩 |
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"I'm making a brew who wants one
At last! I’ve been waiting two weeks for someone to offer. I’ll have a black coffee please (I wouldn’t use the milk if I were you)….
Or the kettle, there's still a dirty sick in there. "
🤢 I think I’ll just opt for a water…. |
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who has seen the film highlander ...
Good so we all understand the concept of hallowed ground. excellent...
So this should be easy then ...
Consider the shower from this day forward hallowed ground... and stop spoofing all over it I just slipped on something and nearly broke my neck. |
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By *inkShyWoman 6 weeks ago
near Windsor |
"I'm making a brew who wants one
At last! I’ve been waiting two weeks for someone to offer. I’ll have a black coffee please (I wouldn’t use the milk if I were you)….
Or the kettle, there's still a dirty sick in there.
🤢 I think I’ll just opt for a water…."
Was there sick in there? Or sock? Or a dirty dick?? |
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"who has seen the film highlander ...
Good so we all understand the concept of hallowed ground. excellent...
So this should be easy then ...
Consider the shower from this day forward hallowed ground... and stop spoofing all over it I just slipped on something and nearly broke my neck."
Absolutely! We should designate a special area in the house for all spaffing activities.
One spot….there can be only one 👍🏻 |
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"I'm making a brew who wants one
At last! I’ve been waiting two weeks for someone to offer. I’ll have a black coffee please (I wouldn’t use the milk if I were you)….
Or the kettle, there's still a dirty sick in there.
🤢 I think I’ll just opt for a water….
Was there sick in there? Or sock? Or a dirty dick??"
It was meant to say "sock", a bit of a typo. 🤦🏼♂️ |
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"I'm making a brew who wants one
At last! I’ve been waiting two weeks for someone to offer. I’ll have a black coffee please (I wouldn’t use the milk if I were you)….
Or the kettle, there's still a dirty sick in there.
🤢 I think I’ll just opt for a water….
Was there sick in there? Or sock? Or a dirty dick??"
I took the briefest peek and am still unsure as to the exact nature of the horror I beheld.
I’m kind of hoping it was just a mouldy sock…..
Either way, avoid it like the plague would be my advice 😵💫😵💫 |
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Someone ordered a lunch buffet for 30 people at work and forgot to cancel it when the meeting got postponed. I've brought it home
It's in the kitchen. Help yourselves, I can't see good food go to waste.
Veg and vegan stuff on green trays. Fish on blue and meat on red. Beers and wine in the fridge. |
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"Someone ordered a lunch buffet for 30 people at work and forgot to cancel it when the meeting got postponed. I've brought it home
It's in the kitchen. Help yourselves, I can't see good food go to waste.
Veg and vegan stuff on green trays. Fish on blue and meat on red. Beers and wine in the fridge."
You’re the bestest!!! I ordered a pizza but it never arrived. |
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"Someone ordered a lunch buffet for 30 people at work and forgot to cancel it when the meeting got postponed. I've brought it home
It's in the kitchen. Help yourselves, I can't see good food go to waste.
Veg and vegan stuff on green trays. Fish on blue and meat on red. Beers and wine in the fridge.
You’re the bestest!!! I ordered a pizza but it never arrived. "
Jamie from Deliveroo, you just can’t rely on that guy…. |
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"[Removed by poster at 29/04/26 22:40:39]
I'm supposed to understand what this means? Typical. This is why the house is so messy. Lack of communication. 😜"
I was asking who stole my dungarees and crocs
Then I remembered you asked to borrow them last night |
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"[Removed by poster at 29/04/26 22:40:39]
I'm supposed to understand what this means? Typical. This is why the house is so messy. Lack of communication. 😜
I was asking who stole my dungarees and crocs
Then I remembered you asked to borrow them last night "
Dungarees, yes. Crocs, no. Like Shaggy said: it wasn't me. |
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