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Long distance relationships...
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Any one else ever been in a long distance relationship? I've been in one for 4 years now... But honestly the chances of us actually meeting is really low.
He doesn't want to progress because of that which is sad |
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By *eliWoman 11 hours ago
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Yes. Several. And we've met many times. If he doesn't want to meet after four years and you're unhappy enough to be questioning and posting about it... it doesn't sound like it's making you happy. |
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"Yes. Several. And we've met many times. If he doesn't want to meet after four years and you're unhappy enough to be questioning and posting about it... it doesn't sound like it's making you happy."
Definitely what Meli said fir your own mental health that can't be good.
Also is it actually a real relationship if you don't meet. |
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By *CExeCouple 11 hours ago
Hong-Kong/Exeter |
Yep, Chels is in Hong-Kong for the foreseeable future. However, she has been in the UK for the last few years and we've met up regularly in that time. We've found swinging and playing solo a great way to keep our spark there.
A long distance relationship where you've never met in several years though sounds very testing. |
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"Any one else ever been in a long distance relationship? I've been in one for 4 years now... But honestly the chances of us actually meeting is really low.
He doesn't want to progress because of that which is sad "
Why haven't you met?
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I'm currently getting to know someone really nice that is hundreds of miles away not ruling out the possibility of meeting but it would be tricky at the minute we're enjoying getting to know each other. Like everything else its just see how it goes. |
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Yes I have but then in perspective the distance wasn’t huge just needed planning.
I think distance brings its own problems and strains. You need to communicate better than in closer relationships. Make sure you make that time for each other and be more honest about things.
If after 4 years you haven’t met even once, then I would question it entirely and if this is something that has a future or is holding you back. |
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Been in one for nearly 7 years. Very casual at the beginning- amped up since last year. But we have always met regularly. More so now that it is more “serious” so to speak.
My husband and I were also in a transcontinental relationship for a few years 25 years ago. We would meet every six months or yearly. We decided we couldn’t do it for longer so got married and I came here.
I would not call a relationship being in contact with someone and not meeting them in person. Sorry! 🎀 |
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OP, as others have said, it's not a true relationship if you've never met, you're just pen pals. And if he doesn't want to meet, what's the point of continuing? I just hope it's not any form of a romance scam. |
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I started off with a FWB I met on here, contact and meets we're frequent enough but lately both have eased off. So to answer the question... If it eases off anymore I'm walking away because I'm not getting out of it what I want from the situation |
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Surprised some are saying it is not a relationship. It may not be a sexual relationship, but even pen pals are in a relationship.
I was in a relationship with my first lover for years before we ever met, initially it was just chat rooms, then moved to yahoo messenger or skype, phone calls, and finally the thorough joy of meeting for the first time.
Good luck OP, hope things work out. |
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By *ypersoonMan 11 hours ago
WHITCHURCH, Shropshire |
Was in 1 long-distance relationship for 8½ years, wasn't too bad but my partner had a few problems mostly the fact she didn't drive so she had to rely on public transport. When the pandemic hit she then lost trust in public transport & expected me to put in the miles to collect her if she wanted to visit me 🙄 (she lived under 25 miles away from me)
Also she was under the thumb of her mother who insisted on her caring for her dad 24/7 (& looking after the family in the process) plus her brother was incredibly weird (some of those habits revealed a couple of years after breaking up 😳)
Not sure I'd want another long-distance relationship unless she had more independence & capability to travel 🤨
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By *az2019Man 11 hours ago
Yorkshire & Manchester |
"I started off with a FWB I met on here, contact and meets we're frequent enough but lately both have eased off. So to answer the question... If it eases off anymore I'm walking away because I'm not getting out of it what I want from the situation "
Spot on... wether its a long distance relationship or close.... if either side isn't getting what they need etc... then either fix it or leave it.
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"I started off with a FWB I met on here, contact and meets we're frequent enough but lately both have eased off. So to answer the question... If it eases off anymore I'm walking away because I'm not getting out of it what I want from the situation
Spot on... wether its a long distance relationship or close.... if either side isn't getting what they need etc... then either fix it or leave it.
"
I've tried 'fixing it' seems to be all one way at the moment 🤷🏼 |
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LDR are tough. I couldn't do it. I need physical contact. 4 years is a long time though. It sounds like you are pen pals. Or in an online relationship.
It's up to you to make the best decision for yourself. |
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4 years without meeting is a long time, my needy little heart couldn't take not having regular access to the person I love, I need intimacy and affection to feel loved. I couldn't do it and to be fair it doesn't sound like it's worth it from what you've said. I wish you luck but it's a no thank you from me.
Mrs x |
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"4 years without meeting is a long time, my needy little heart couldn't take not having regular access to the person I love, I need intimacy and affection to feel loved. I couldn't do it and to be fair it doesn't sound like it's worth it from what you've said. I wish you luck but it's a no thank you from me.
Mrs x"
This 👆🏼 👌🏼 |
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"Any one else ever been in a long distance relationship? I've been in one for 4 years now... But honestly the chances of us actually meeting is really low.
He doesn't want to progress because of that which is sad "
Tell me what makes this a relationship please ? |
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Don't judge the guy or assume what's not stated.
The context may not be that he's uninvested.
Could be that he has hung in this long because of real, genuine interest.
But honestly if, as you said, meeting isn't ever going to happen then he is setting a boundary that he needs to move on in life.
Which is completely reasonable.
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The thing is, time goes past so quickly you don’t want to spend time on a person (and 4 years IS a long time) only to find it goes nowhere. You can’t get that time back.
It’s not so bad if you’re in your late teens/early twenties, but do you really want to spend more years on a “maybe we will go somewhere/maybe not” situation?
And if it were me, If they lived in another Country (just summizing) and took holidays abroad but never came to see me, I’d get really annoyed. But that’s just me.
Life is too short to dilly dally about I reckon. |
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"Yes we chat on cam every day and will occasionally play.
He encourages me to see people here in the UK which is the main reason I'm on fab to be honest.
We do want to meet but it's expensive "
You could have saved up in 4 years.
Waste of your time, delete block and move on. |
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By *CExeCouple 7 hours ago
Hong-Kong/Exeter |
"Yes we chat on cam every day and will occasionally play.
He encourages me to see people here in the UK which is the main reason I'm on fab to be honest.
We do want to meet but it's expensive "
What country is he in? |
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"Yes we chat on cam every day and will occasionally play.
He encourages me to see people here in the UK which is the main reason I'm on fab to be honest.
We do want to meet but it's expensive
What country is he in?"
You haven’t sent him any money have you? |
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I think it depends on what you both agreed when you started up?.
Did he give you the impression you'd meet? If so and it hasn't happened after 4 years and you want to, I'd probably cut my losses.
If it's never been agreed, then that's different I think.
But, if it's not fulfilling you or your needs, maybe time to rethink it op. Good luck. |
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