We are a long term and very happy couple and very excited to get into this scene, taking us a while with work & kids as for lot of people. We have had a few socials but not got round to actually doing anything yet sometimes held back from us talking about it all and how we feel, scared and nervous. We have only ever been with each other so far aswell.
Wanted to hear some couples advice/opinions on how you got into it and how you deal with it all, how do you go for it and fuck away so to speak lol, |
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By *Effy-Woman 4 weeks ago
Scotland |
Lots and lots and lots of open conversations about it before we even thought about meeting anyone.
Take things slow, socials are a good start. Don't forget to check in with each other before, during and afterwards.
If it's not fun, stop. |
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"Lots and lots and lots of open conversations about it before we even thought about meeting anyone.
Take things slow, socials are a good start. Don't forget to check in with each other before, during and afterwards.
If it's not fun, stop. "
This... |
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Just jump in head first and see what comes out in the wash.
If it’s great then do it again.
If it’s bad then don’t do it again.
Bit like baking a cake, experiment with the ingredients until it works to your tastes.
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Talk. A lot.
To eachother and anyone who plan on potentially getting naked with. Just diving in may sound like an option but is fraught with danger. It's common with couples that the woman will get more attention than the guy (both from singles and other couples) and that can lead to them feeling marginalised and left out. If it seems that one half is getting all the focus and having more interaction than the other then it can lead to jealousy and feelings of resentment.
Communication really is key. Discussions on everything from boundaries, desires and limits, to what to do if one half isn’t happy, need to be had repeatedly until you're 100% satisfied that you're both singing from the same hymn sheet. There's nothing worse than thinking you’ve agreed things between you only to find when the time comes to get naked with others, one of you gets carried away in the moment and forgets what's been agreed.
The first time is usually the hardest. Once you're over that hurdle it's key then to talk to eachother about the experience and for each to explain how they felt it went, what they enjoyed and anything they didn’t.
It sounds like a lot of pre and post play analysis, but it really is an important part of involving others.
The more comfortable you both become, the less you'll need to do it, but remember the golden rule - either of you is entitled to say no at any time and the other needs to respect that. 😉 |
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Talk, talk and then talk again.
We did a few nudist beaches to be naked around others.
We tried sites like FAB at first but became discouraged by the fakes, timewasters and dreamers but people recommended visiting a club.
Off to a club we went.
Many years ago now but we were quivering wrecks the first few times but slowly, but surely people started to chat to us and we became more confident.
From there private party invites came through and we started swingers weekends and holidays to Gran Canaria and Cap D'Agde.
Its a great, exciting, fun, journey. |
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I met my partner here so it was slightly different I think. When we decided we wanted to meet couples together, we had a social and then a hotel meet with a couple.
We talked, as others have said and established our boundaries and nos.
It was hot watching my other half with a woman, whilst I was playing with her husband.
Try and remember you're going home with each other, this is just an extra as and when you want to.
Never do something you haven't both agreed to, as this is what can cause issues or jealousy.
Try and relax and remember others suffer nerves too. Maybe try a club and just play together and observe.
Have fun. |
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