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POSITIVE

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By *exycleaner OP   Woman  over a year ago

pontefract

in order to be less negative i have decided to steer clear of men ,

that way they cant use me for sex and i not get hurt or upset when they ignore me

afterwards .simples really.....

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I think you do yourself a disservice, life throws things at us from time to time and it may impact how we see things.

You have clearly made progress and that is great to see.

Once you get your confidence back, you will be shagging those blokes, wishing them well and enjoying your time to the max.

It is a state of mind and you are winning

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"in order to be less negative i have decided to steer clear of men ,

that way they cant use me for sex and i not get hurt or upset when they ignore me

afterwards .simples really....."

Is this the right site for you to be on then do you think ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Easy answer is dont let men use you for sex, use them, then move on and shout next !!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't you use men for sex?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Easy answer is dont let men use you for sex, use them, then move on and shout next !!"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Surely your using the men as much as they are using you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Surely your using the men as much as they are using you? "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Try match.dom

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The fact you say they are using you for sex suggests you want more from them? If so are you looking in the right place.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"in order to be less negative i have decided to steer clear of men ,

that way they cant use me for sex and i not get hurt or upset when they ignore me

afterwards .simples really....."

Unless you're looking for a relationship with them, does it matter that they are ignoring you afterwards? I don't chat to everyone after I've met them, and I certainly wouldn't expect them to. Maybe your expectations are not being communicated beforehand? Either way, it sounds like you are doing the right thing if it is making you unhappy.

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By *exycleaner OP   Woman  over a year ago

pontefract

im not looking for a relationship but just wanted to have guys as friends but i;m still not over my hurt still way too vulnerable not to be taken advantage of so i need to stay clear of men ,i cant put my opinions of them on here cos you will all tell me off ,so just need time away from men x

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By *isscheekychopsWoman  over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Its not about telling you off....Its about reading the posts you put on the forums...I don't think its the men doing anything wrong unless they are promising you diamonds...however i still take things at face value with people on here and don't look to deep into a situation. I think you are battling your own issues and i think you need to resolve those....people prey on people weakness and use it to their gain...I think the issues lie with you and not the men involved...you are coming across at times as a bitter man hater...its not a good trait as men will run a mile even as friends...Work on yourself and things will turn around and you will be in a position to use men rather than they use you...good luck

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By *bony in IvoryCouple  over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

Sometimes we all need a break from things... Time to take stock, reflect and move forward. Hoping not to let the past spoil what in the future,( could be so good! ) Dont rely on others for your contentment, and happiness... What we are on the inside shows on the outside! Own your own possitivity!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Are you giving out a positive image?

That goes a long way to how people perceive you.

How they perceive you will affect how they react to you and how you will be treated

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not the best place for the thin-skinned or frail of heart the world of swinging.

I think you need to be very secure and broad-shouldered to totally enjoy it.

Take a break, concentrate on you and you alone but try not to just blame the guys, we're all here looking for stuff we can get from each other and give to each other such is the nature of the community, not just the fellas!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You've come so far SC. A big high five to you for that. Take your time and things will come good for you. We wish you well xx

jules and dave

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By *sagent81Man  over a year ago

leeds

Try being a man on this site ! Then you will truly know about rejection and being ignored. If the roles were reversed on fab all the women would quit in tears within a week. Just get on with it an put your feelings a side. If you can't your in the wrong place.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman  over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Try being a man on this site ! Then you will truly know about rejection and being ignored. If the roles were reversed on fab all the women would quit in tears within a week. Just get on with it an put your feelings a side. If you can't your in the wrong place."

err you think?

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By *isscheekychopsWoman  over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Try being a man on this site ! Then you will truly know about rejection and being ignored. If the roles were reversed on fab all the women would quit in tears within a week. Just get on with it an put your feelings a side. If you can't your in the wrong place.

err you think? "

women suffer rejection and being ignored just the same as men...the difference is we don't moan about it...

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Try being a man on this site ! Then you will truly know about rejection and being ignored. If the roles were reversed on fab all the women would quit in tears within a week. Just get on with it an put your feelings a side. If you can't your in the wrong place.

err you think?

women suffer rejection and being ignored just the same as men...the difference is we don't moan about it..."

I do! I just don't moan about it on the forums.

This is probably not the best site for anyone with self esteem issues, as even chatting to people could lead to feeling let down when the bloke chooses to chat elsewhere. Hide the profile and have some non-swinging fun!

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By *bony in IvoryCouple  over a year ago

Black&White Utopia


"Try being a man on this site ! Then you will truly know about rejection and being ignored. If the roles were reversed on fab all the women would quit in tears within a week. Just get on with it an put your feelings a side. If you can't your in the wrong place."
really?! Lol .... No one on Fab would have me in tears! Unless tears of laughter!

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

If this is the strategy that is going to work for you OP then give it a go for a while.

I avoided men for 14 years until 4 years ago. It wasn't positive but it did mean I stopped crying about men for 13 years.

Get over your marriage loss and find out who you are and what you want.

It is possible to have male friends on here and not be attached to them. The three men I met when I was in a couple on here remain men I still see three years on. If they don't want to see me it's not a big deal as I know we are friends and will get together when time allows.

When your head and heart feel like yours again then you can build the friendships.

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