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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The fabber above you.

Usual rules, it must be funny

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Had this man of mystery over for who know's what. It's still all a mystery now, better call the Scooby and the gang to solve this one.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well I'm not sure about them being a "Naughty Twosome" - all I said was park on the driveway and seventeen of them showed up in a transit with a caravan.

On the plus side - they made a lovely job of the tarmac....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Not the most colourful of characters but at the end of the day it's all there in black and white

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By *dwalu2Couple  over a year ago

Bristol

Frankly hopeless. Was all fingers and thumbs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I saw Mysteriousguy last night. He donned a super hero suit, and flew through the night sky with such fluidity, fighting crime with ease. Who is this Mysterious Guy?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met up with Ejay yesterday. He's completely different to what's in his photos. Bald, at least 65 years of age and toothless. His "tattoos" are actually scribbled on with permanent marker.

A complete disappointment.

I ran for the hills.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met Boldgirl recently and was surprised to find out that she's really really timid. Never even got to first base, never mind score a home run!!

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By *ittle Pocket PerveWoman  over a year ago

Portsmouth

Had a drama free girls night out with boldgirl last night... Drinks and laughs all round

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met up with Ejay yesterday. He's completely different to what's in his photos. Bald, at least 65 years of age and toothless. His "tattoos" are actually scribbled on with permanent marker.

A complete disappointment.

I ran for the hills. "

It's true

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met Boldgirl recently and was surprised to find out that she's really really timid. Never even got to first base, never mind score a home run!!

"

Met PolarBear in the Kings Arms - 4'7" and ginger - no wonder his pics are all B&W!

PS - the white shirt? His Mum's work blouse

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By *isscheekychopsWoman  over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I pissed up his lamp post and wiped my arse on his Knights armour

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bumped into Knight the other day at the boozer. Top bloke, spent hours listening to his stories of dragon slaying.

Glad we arranged to meet again soon. C U next Tuesday mate

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I saw Mrpolarbear at the pub last night with knightslayr. The guys a fraud. He isn't even a real polar bear. What the fuck?

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By *igzag1Man  over a year ago

hartlepool

Can't write a funny one when the guy is gorgeous and a wanna suck his dick

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met Ejay at the "Fab's Hottest Men 2015" club (we're VIP members). I stroked his beard, he stroked mine. We proceeded to make sweet coitus with the promise we wouldn't tell anyone of our delicious secret.

Oh wait...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ejay more like DJ as he really knew how to spin those tunes and had us dancing all night long

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Met Ejay at the "Fab's Hottest Men 2015" club (we're VIP members). I stroked his beard, he stroked mine. We proceeded to make sweet coitus with the promise we wouldn't tell anyone of our delicious secret.

Oh wait..."

Fucking hell hahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Meeting by cam: saw these two on sainsburys cctv shoplifting.. sexy couple, expensive taste in groceries!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Whilst having a quiet beer the other day was rudely interrupted my the young whiper snapper EJay. No matter how many times he boasted about the number of cruches he did before leaving the house he just wouldn't get the message until I bought him a Pina colada with a sparkler and a wee umbrella. He skipped off happily after that.

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By *ensual temptressWoman  over a year ago

Southampton

Mr polar bear left me shaken and stirred (in all the right ways ).double o heaven for sure .

The role play was great .....got that shelf put up I wanted ...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

After watching the way he moved across the dance floor I realised who Ejay was - when he passed out and face planted into the managers table I realised that was a Roofie Colada.... Mind the umbrella broke his fall.... or his nose

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

After many naughty messages finally met up with Sensual Temptress last night. What can I say, she's a demon in the bedroom, very demanding!! Watch out for her ulterior motives though guys, make sure you're tooled up.

Oh btw Sensual you still owe me for the screws!

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By *ensual temptressWoman  over a year ago

Southampton


"After many naughty messages finally met up with Sensual Temptress last night. What can I say, she's a demon in the bedroom, very demanding!! Watch out for her ulterior motives though guys, make sure you're tooled up.

Oh btw Sensual you still owe me for the screws!"

Lmao ! ! I always pay my debts hehe ! X

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By *ola.Woman  over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

Slayr man of mystery. Well was mysterious as he never turned up. He later phoned to say his mum wouldn't let him out.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Her name is Lola and yes she really is a showgirl.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lola - she was a showgirl..

Dopey bint forgot to take the headdress off - thing was so big it blocked the doors in Costa - hence having to be back at Mums before the curfew!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Was asked to stop off at the kebab shop on the way round to Lolas. She likes her dirty meat apparently. Was a bit miffed though that I spent the rest of the night on all fours on her kitchen floor scrubbing. Pfft!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mr polar bear by far he was hot n well trust me end of night i wasnt cold anymore

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By *ola.Woman  over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

Polar..Seiously send a cub round to do a man's job!! When I told him to get on all fours he started to clean my floors with his tongue. Strange man, but got a shiny clean floor.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lola 02.

Don't meet her she's boring and rubbish in bed. Within 10 minutes I was half asleep and wanted to leave.

* Obviously designed to keep you to myself*

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Moan moan moan moan moan

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Forgot to mention it but PolarBear's dementia can be a little worrying - Knights not Dragon's.

Oh and sorry about her sitting on the Landlords car - its the tail.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I want to play...... I don't really know if I'm supposed to know you guys a little better than I do though

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I want to play...... I don't really know if I'm supposed to know you guys a little better than I do though "

Just jump in - feet first.

We won't be offended.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I want to play...... I don't really know if I'm supposed to know you guys a little better than I do though "

Go for it, we'd love you to play x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

It was dark, he hid in the shadows, couldn't actually see him but he had a very high pitched voice. I got the feeling it may have been a very short lady standing on a tea chest.

Very firm handshake though. The fist is still very tender

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It was dark, he hid in the shadows, couldn't actually see him but he had a very high pitched voice. I got the feeling it may have been a very short lady standing on a tea chest.

Very firm handshake though. The fist is still very tender "

had just trapped my balls in my fly & had to stand on the tea chest to ensure it didn't get knicked

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Probably won't show this veri as we didn't see eye to eye

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"Probably won't show this veri as we didn't see eye to eye "

We had a great time, despite a misunderstanding about him not coming as Saruman for my Lord of the Rings themed party. All he had to do was whitewash his hand, but no, he just lowered his hand by 3 inches and claimed it was Gimli son of his dad's loin.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Probably won't show this veri as we didn't see eye to eye "

Really disappointing meet. Was so looking forward to those hands but he wouldn't take his mittens off

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Probably won't show this veri as we didn't see eye to eye

Really disappointing meet. Was so looking forward to those hands but he wouldn't take his mittens off "

Mis-representation in its greatest form!

DIdn't moan once

Wasn't a twat

And no bollocks

Although the Barmaid did run screaming from the Snug.....

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By *igeiaWoman  over a year ago

Bristol

He turned up claiming to be hung like a horse but instead arrived clapping coconuts together to make an equine sound. He then insisted I wear a helmet like in Knightmare and proceeded to spend the meet ordering me to go left a bit, right a bit etc. Plus I beat him at chess and he didn't slay either of my knights in the process.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

She read to me the dictionary. But, i could not complain. I was truly mesmerised by seeing those lips move.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The beard didn't tickle my fancy

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Felt a little put off by the fact that they kept taking notes

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

A mere shadow of what I had expected

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A mere shadow of what I had expected"

Met this man a few nights ago.Great with his hands, but the rest is still a mystery, can't wait to meet the rest of him xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Gave a great blow job but her maths was shit

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Gave a great blow job but her maths was shit "

Thought we were meeting Howard marks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Unfortunately went UNLOS after our meet. No more Mr Nice guy.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Took there time to get here, blamed traffic - was shocked to learn it was Her in the suit

Mind he does have great legs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Needed a tin opener but otherwise not too bad

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Needed a tin opener but otherwise not too bad "

Had boobs. Didn't hear a word that was said

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Can I have my knickers back there under the bed.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

his legs were not as long or slender as the profile pics suggest. They were also considerably more hairy.. very deep voice which threw me right off..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Needed a tin opener but otherwise not too bad

Had boobs. Didn't hear a word that was said "

have gun will travel...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I have my knickers back there under the bed. "
left her knickers under the bed so she could pop back to 'pick them up'

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Sandl40 - it was lovely to see them, but they could have told me they were crime fighting vigilantes prior to this, as they left part way through the meet to save an old lady from Scunner Campbell

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Have been carrying my tits around in my handbag since she left. Seemed such a nice person too. Why she felt the need to steal my entire bra collection I don't know. I would have given her one if she asked nicely. Seems our bust measurement is the only thing we have in common after all.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bloody hell! They're real

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Hadn't realised the person in their av was actually her

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/02/15 22:42:09]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mysterious -

I got excited when he said ive got finger puppets.... It wasn't the show I was expecting

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wondergurl :

I wondered what all this swinging was about and what they all get upto. This lovely lass left me in no doubt whatsoever.

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. (lyric from a song but i forget which lol)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met up with WonderGurl last night...

She popped my lady cherry, good and proper.

Lovely girl, let me wear her fabulous corset.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

wondergirl

awfuly badly behaved in the beginning of the day and needed treatment to a locally chaifed area

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm crap lol

Can't think of anything

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm crap lol

Can't think of anything "

MrsMadSexyTease

Constipated but lovely with it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Canis turned up very late saying something about being followed by a pack of dogs on heat. I suggested it may have been the Bonio biscuits he had in his pocket. I did have to smack his nose a couple of times when he stuck it where it shouldn't have been and my slippers have mysterious bite marks on them. Only having one ball didn't handicap him in any way,he was all over me like a dog on a meaty bone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

WalkingTaff

Great beach was what he offered but the tide came in too soon

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Like pissing on an electric fence I was buzzing during our meet. What started as a game of strip Connect 4 rapidly descended into 17 minutes of passion. Awesome. We then built a fort with scatter cushions and sheets and drew moustaches onto pictures of famous people whilst eating Skittles.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shybie

The trip on the camel to outer Mongolia was worth it , if just to peep in to this ladies yurt

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ptrichor - was a bit weirded out as the tie really is a pencil...

Apparently theres a larger one keeping his back straight but I didn't want to ask where he was keeping it....

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Knightslayr:

I couldn't wait to get him undressed but it took 2 and half hours to get him out of all that tin suit and chainmail. I was left exhausted and frustrated. He lived up to his name and my night was slain.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Licketysplits:

An amazing pair..

an amazing trick with the tongue...

but I wasn't the only one living up to my name that night...

On the plus side - my armour got cleaned

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Licketyslits, sure lived up to her name, took one look at me and couldn't get away fast enough.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Licketyslits, sure lived up to her name, took one look at me and couldn't get away fast enough. "

If you have seen one silhouette avatar you have seen them all

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Scrumdiddly

Supercalefragelisticexpialidocious!

#enoughsaid

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Scrumdiddly

Supercalefragelisticexpialidocious!

#enoughsaid "

Miss Cariadus:

Wandered in, shouting like that one from Gavin and Stacey...

Necked the two pints that were on the bar, the guys next to them and then proceeded to pilfer a barrel from behind the bar!

To top it off a fight broke out when it turns out she'd borrowed Ejays heels. Poor lad had only popped in to see PolarBear

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Knightslayr - NOT what I was hoping for. His steed was a small moped, with a pizza box on the back, for a starter, as opposed to the mighty destrier I was expecting. His armour was nice and he had gotten a Blue Peter badge for it, but did have a hole in the back, where he'd used some of it for wrapping a piece of salmon in.

He did make up for this by having a mighty sword, but whilst this was great for slicing the Battenberg, it did not make the meet. Top guy, all the same, though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tinatitz

If I remember rightly, it was as wonderful meet with Tina....I'm not precicely sure though as it was 22 months ago...she gave me a tit wank and i've literally just found my way out today....

It does mean I was present for the next 37 meets she had...I've been living lost in her cleavage surviving off biscuit crumbs and semen...

Someone call me an ambulance please!!

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By *oddyWoman  over a year ago

between havant and chichester

I was expecting a smooth gent to turn up instead christos is a 6ft bearded wrestler with hands like shovels highlight of the night was mcdonalds happy meal

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Was either that or half a greggs steak bake I found down the back of the seat on the way over....I thought I'd go the class route

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Met christos yesterday for a social I could see he liked wearing ladies bra's BUT when he arrive dressed up as a full on women I felt cheated!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

She's sweet

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

The meet was pants

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mysterious guy......is actually a mysterious lady!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Mysterious guy......is actually a mysterious lady! "

I lost count of the number of times I had to tell her I didn't need the drive tarmacing....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Mysterious guy......is actually a mysterious lady!

I lost count of the number of times I had to tell her I didn't need the drive tarmacing...."

we didn't actually meet, his drive was too muddy to walk up in stilletos

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I meet knight slayer yesterday for wot i was hoping was going to be a night of him slayin her (me ) but instead he put on srek puss in boots n every time the dam dragon came on he licked the tv svreen

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Nice girl, very pleasant.

Leaves you with rope burns

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