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Single mum and 10 year old son
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"It IS blood flow but stimulated physically than mentally.Some young kids might just worry if they think it's always sexual.It would be difficult for some young lads to think that they are 'sex obsessed' and discuss it with their mothers...that's all I meant." He doesnt know that his willy does stuff that envolves sex as he is too young to understand that. I was more interested in simple answers that I can give to him and thought that the blood in his willy was a nice simple explanation and would also cover when he starts saying that when he is excited it also sticks up. Its so difficult to know what to say when I dont have a willy. No doubt single dads would be in the same situation with a daughter. Appreciate your help xx | |||
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"Have you thought of asking the health visitor at your doctors surgery? There must be 100s of women in your situation they are probably leaflets about all you need to know. Good luck x "Damn good idea. Never thought about that. Will contact them | |||
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"With regards to his 'where do babies come from' and 'what are my balls for?' - you can answer both questions in one go for him. Tell him that babies are made when the sperm from the man meets the egg in the woman (head off his immediate question after you say that by saying 'and you don't need to know how they meet right now'). Tell him sperm looks like little tadpoles. Once he's got the idea of tadpoles and eggs in his head to make babies, you tell him that the tadpoles are made in his balls and without them he has no tadpoles, and that's why he has to look after them. With regard to the morning erections, be honest with him. He'll appreciate it. Tell him that a willy is used for more than just going for a pee and is also involved in making babies (but again, 'you don't need to know how right now'), and then follow it up with "and when you wake up and it's all stiff it's just your body testing it out to make sure it's working properly and it's nothing to worry about." Now, once he's understood all that, it's still gonna happen - regularly, and when he eventually discovers the joys of playing with it for too long there is no way in this world you are ever going to stop him doing it. It's a part of life and when he does eventually ejaculate (if he hasn't already) he'll *know* what semen is and have an inkling of where it has to go to make babies. That's when you tell him that he needs to be earning at least £20k per annum before he can make babies. "Sounds like good advice to me...but I would say at least £50k  | |||
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"I am a single mum whos son is now 13, Id just like to say the schools start sex education at the age of 9, so hes proberly got some idea. Like you I had to ask my sons father to do a sex talk and the poor bugger came back more confused as ever so I just braved it and one night I did the whole chat. And now anything going on he just comes out and asks so in a way it was best it came from me. " best way i suppose | |||
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"as a father of 3,oldest 12 this year,the best advice i can give you is go to your nearest bookshop and get a childs guide to puberty,,, i have done this with my eldest lad and my niece,who is 13,talk with them first then have a quick look at the book with them,get them to write down any questions they may have and then you can ansewer to best of your ability and if you cant,you have the book" do the tadpoles turn into frogs or toads ??... | |||
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As for anything else, I just tell him the truth but in a clean way.
Well done to that mother!
Tony | |||
"as a father of 3,oldest 12 this year,the best advice i can give you is go to your nearest bookshop and get a childs guide to puberty,,, i have done this with my eldest lad and my niece,who is 13,talk with them first then have a quick look at the book with them,get them to write down any questions they may have and then you can ansewer to best of your ability and if you cant,you have the book" My mum did this for me. The book had pictures in it showing how the body changed during puberty. I had my first wank to the pic of the boy with an errection | |||
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What a truly nice thread. I love you guys!!!
*hides tear* | |||
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"Sorry about all the typos, I'm on my phone. "That's OK, just don't crash the car | |||
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"My lad is a lovely lad really and very emotionally aware. He isnt really a little shit of course as am very proud of him but is naturally pushing boundaries and boy does he get it in the neck if he steps too far over the line. Luckily I am an assertive person so doesnt get to swing the lead too far without consequences lol He hasnt mentioned what he hears from school about sex but will keep a listen out for anything he says. I will make sure I start reminding him to wash his bits and piences and see what he wants me to call it when reminding him to wash it. So far we just call it his willy or I often say bits and pieces. Thanks for your suggestions xxx" You need to make sure he knows to clean under the foreskin. As the white mucas that collects there can cause infection and can also carry cancerous cells (learnt this bit from watching embarrasing illness program) | |||
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"...So please anyone that can offer some helpful advice or suggestions as I really want him to turn into a nice young man but am aware it isnt going to be easy. Thanks in anticipation x" Not being a Mum, I don't have any advice to offer you, but I just wanted to say congratulations on the thought and effort you're putting in on this subject, and I'm sure your son will turn out to be a lovely young man. From my own experience of being brought up by a single parent, the only thing I would say is ... don't underestimate how much he has already heard from school/friends. Even 35 years ago, I had heard all sorts in the playground, before my Mum thought I was 'old enough for THE TALK'. I can remember that, when I learned that some boys were growing pubic hair (I was probably about age 8), I thought it was some kind of illness or disease. When I learned that 'worms' go into 'front bottoms' (LOL probably aged about 7) I decided to marry Kevin Smith because I thought that, since all Kevin's classmates were taller than him, that I'd be less likely to notice him put his worm into my front bottom. Eh, if only I'd known! LOL  | |||
"It IS blood flow but stimulated physically than mentally.Some young kids might just worry if they think it's always sexual.It would be difficult for some young lads to think that they are 'sex obsessed' and discuss it with their mothers...that's all I meant." what a great response. without over-complicating | |||
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"Mind you he has just finished a 15 min conversation with me about the fact that he feels less love from me than his younger brother gets since his brother was 3(coincides with little one becoming more annoying).." You're doing fine. But remember, sometimes kids are just being kids. He'd moan about his wee brother even if circumstances were different. He's a ten year old boy. Never underestimate his ability to try emotional blackmail as a means to a new xbox, bike etc etc etc! | |||
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"as a father of 3,oldest 12 this year,the best advice i can give you is go to your nearest bookshop and get a childs guide to puberty,,, i have done this with my eldest lad and my niece,who is 13,talk with them first then have a quick look at the book with them,get them to write down any questions they may have and then you can ansewer to best of your ability and if you cant,you have the book My mum did this for me. The book had pictures in it showing how the body changed during puberty. I had my first wank to the pic of the boy with an errection "see it does work,,,lol | |||
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"My lad is a lovely lad really and very emotionally aware. He isnt really a little shit of course as am very proud of him but is naturally pushing boundaries and boy does he get it in the neck if he steps too far over the line. Luckily I am an assertive person so doesnt get to swing the lead too far without consequences lol He hasnt mentioned what he hears from school about sex but will keep a listen out for anything he says. I will make sure I start reminding him to wash his bits and piences and see what he wants me to call it when reminding him to wash it. So far we just call it his willy or I often say bits and pieces. Thanks for your suggestions xxx" It was only until I could peel my foreskin back that I really managed to clean it properly. Some boys (and men) have tight foreskins which doesn't help. I could never really retract mine until I was about 19 - it was just too painful to contemplate. I found inserting the tip of my little finger and trying to ease it helped. Trouble is - that sort of treatment just gave me an erection - which sort of defeated the point of what I was trying to do. It's sort of the case of letting him get used to handle his bits n pieces - he'll soon find out (if he hasn't already) that it's pleasurable. I always found it easier to answer questions rather than say: right lets talk about .... | |||
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"Update... My lad is now happy "twiddling" with his ky gel and very proud to show me how far his foreskin can go down now as he is getting more brave with it. One of the books "willies and other boys bits" has arrived and read some passages from it to him which he was pleased about. He is off to his dads this weekend so have to have the conversation and explain about what is happening to his dad lol From past experience I wont hold my breath that his dad will chat with him about willies as he has said he would. I expect the "time wont be right " so will be forgotten about. Wish I was a fly on the wall lol" if only you was a fly on the wall, you would be amazed just how us men would deal with such a topic. lol i wish you all the luck with this as iam pretty sure that your gut instinct is 100%. | |||
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"taking notes from this thread for when it is my turn to go through it all with my son...lol he is only 5 so hopefully I still have a few years before the really big questions come...lol " iam sure by then there will be an iphone app for that lol | |||
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"I may beat him to death with my bare hands if I find one more fucking sock left on the floor." Don't worry, soon enough his crusty Fuck Sock will be able to stand up by itself! | |||
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