FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Big Fab House Party

Big Fab House Party

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

You're all hypothetically invited to my Hypothetical House Party. It's a Weekender.

Hypothetically I've moved into a small country manor. It has plenty of rooms to put you all up. There's a huge fully stocked kitchen, bbq, hotub and indoor pool.

What are you bringing to the table? What's your party trick? Who would you like a dance with? What tunes do you want?

I've met all my responsibilities as the host.. The rest is up to you.

*Ghengis is seeking to lure at least one Lurker into his thread, so if it's your first post, give a shout out to yourself* Faliure is not an option.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Theme is Pirates and it's fancy dress.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'll dance with you and I'll be a female pirate waving my massive dildo around like a sword and dancing to Jump around!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Aaarrr!! I'll bring my wooden leg and wank the plank.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Aaarrr!! I'll bring my wooden leg and wank the plank."

*walk

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

I'd like to come.. dressed like Adam ant

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'll dance with you and I'll be a female pirate waving my massive dildo around like a sword and dancing to Jump around! "

You're so coming!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Aaarrr!! I'll bring my wooden leg and wank the plank."

First answer accepted, second declined

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'd like to come.. dressed like Adam ant

*Ghengis eyes you with contempt, p

because you successfully got around his rulebook* If you must.. enter friend.

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By *wisted999Man over a year ago

North Bucks

I’m in charge of the BBQ. Give me a beer and an apron and fucking leave me to it.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

I'll know it when I find it.

I'll be a pirate wench, complete with corset and doing my party trick of balancing pints on my boobs. Music wise I'd throw on Aerosmith.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I’m in charge of the BBQ. Give me a beer and an apron and fucking leave me to it. "

You fucking legend! Come with me.. Coal or gas? What's your set up, I've got it all. Some guests may be bringing food of their own. So be prepared for requests. Unless you're a chef? In which case.. What's on the BBQ Friday night because I'll be starving.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'll be a pirate wench, complete with corset and doing my party trick of balancing pints on my boobs. Music wise I'd throw on Aerosmith. "

Pleased to have you.. I'll take one of those pints please.. *Whoops* Sorry, I meant to grab the pint I swear!

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By *apascouseMan over a year ago

Liverpool

My leg leg would fit in well, only need the parrot on my shoulder

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By *isaB45Woman over a year ago

Fabville

I am the treasure

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yay!! I love Pirate fancy dress

I’ve got just the outfit with a huge hat!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I will bring a chocolate fountain so we can do some chocolate body painting!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I’m in charge of the BBQ. Give me a beer and an apron and fucking leave me to it. "

I've had a request from Gemini Man. He's asked if you'll just wear the apron and nothing else.

It's up to you buddy.. Grease spitting burns aren't pleasant, till you get used to it *Fab Chef Cooking Cock* It's like how chefs and waiting staff pick up hot plates.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can bring canapés, fizz and karaoke

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My leg leg would fit in well, only need the parrot on my shoulder

There are a lot of missing limbs at my party, loving it. What parrot would you pick? African Grey? Cockatiel? Macaw?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I shall wander around asking people to show me their booty

oh and vodka!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

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By *inkysexpotMan over a year ago

leeds

Going with the theme.... I would have to bring a massive selection of toys and outfits and hide them around the place with treasure maps aswell

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I will bring a chocolate fountain so we can do some chocolate body painting!"

Nice. Where are you going to set up? Lounge? A bedroom? Garden?

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By *apascouseMan over a year ago

Liverpool

"My leg leg would fit in well, only need the parrot on my shoulder

There are a lot of missing limbs at my party, loving it. What parrot would you pick? African Grey? Cockatiel? Macaw?"

Well I’m 6’5 so African grey would fit

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I can bring canapés, fizz and karaoke

Do pirates eat canapes and drink fizz? Love a good sing a long though.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I shall wander around asking people to show me their booty

oh and vodka!"

You had me up until "Vodka". It's Rum m'dear.

*Ghengis moonys you*

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I will bring a chocolate fountain so we can do some chocolate body painting!

Nice. Where are you going to set up? Lounge? A bedroom? Garden? "

Bedroom of course!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Going with the theme.... I would have to bring a massive selection of toys and outfits and hide them around the place with treasure maps aswell "

I like it. Is the "X" on my genitals?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My leg leg would fit in well, only need the parrot on my shoulder

There are a lot of missing limbs at my party, loving it. What parrot would you pick? African Grey? Cockatiel? Macaw?

Well I’m 6’5 so African grey would fit "

Beautiful creatures.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I shall wander around asking people to show me their booty

oh and vodka!"

Ooooh vodka for me please!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I will bring a chocolate fountain so we can do some chocolate body painting!

Nice. Where are you going to set up? Lounge? A bedroom? Garden?

Bedroom of course!"

Good, I was worried about the wasps

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I shall wander around asking people to show me their booty

oh and vodka!

Ooooh vodka for me please!"

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

I'll bring bottles of rum

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can bring canapés, fizz and karaoke

Do pirates eat canapes and drink fizz? Love a good sing a long though."

This Pirate sure does...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'll bring bottles of rum"

Marry me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m in and will bring the barrels of beer and tankards don’t want a dry party oh and anything by Coldplay

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What music are we having? My requests would be some Foo Fighters, Royal Blood and Hozier

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"I'll bring bottles of rum

Marry me

"
just poured myself a tot. Cheers.. down the hatch

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What music are we having? My requests would be some Foo Fighters, Royal Blood and Hozier"

Aerosmith, Coldplay and whatever you just picked so far.. plus my favourite tracks.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

Yes! No mind games though.

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

ooo..and ice ... I'll get some ice too

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By *isaB45Woman over a year ago

Fabville

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?"

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What music are we having? My requests would be some Foo Fighters, Royal Blood and Hozier

Aerosmith, Coldplay and whatever you just picked so far.. plus my favourite tracks. "

And your favourite tracks are?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'll bring bottles of rum

Marry me

just poured myself a tot. Cheers.. down the hatch

Men are basta*d's.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What music are we having? My requests would be some Foo Fighters, Royal Blood and Hozier

Aerosmith, Coldplay and whatever you just picked so far.. plus my favourite tracks.

And your favourite tracks are?"

You'll have to wait and see. Pretty much all of the 60s and 70s for a start.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

Where? No shivered timbering going on in my hot tub! Pool can take it.. but I'll have your gonads off if there's a funky tub at the end of the weekend.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Dirrrrrrrty gets!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

Where? No shivered timbering going on in my hot tub! Pool can take it.. but I'll have your gonads off if there's a funky tub at the end of the weekend."

Would the gangplank be ok

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

Yes! No mind games though."

No mind games here me hearty

, sorting out the packs of tights and balloons as we speak!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

Where? No shivered timbering going on in my hot tub! Pool can take it.. but I'll have your gonads off if there's a funky tub at the end of the weekend.

Would the gangplank be ok

I think Rubidoux is Wanking it. I'd ask her first. She's a feisty one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

Yes! No mind games though.

No mind games here me hearty

, sorting out the packs of tights and balloons as we speak!"

Are they black? With Jolly Rogers on?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

Where? No shivered timbering going on in my hot tub! Pool can take it.. but I'll have your gonads off if there's a funky tub at the end of the weekend.

Would the gangplank be ok

I think Rubidoux is Wanking it. I'd ask her first. She's a feisty one."

I would get my cutless out and give her a prod

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would have an beautiful bird at my side and we would shiver our timbers

Where? No shivered timbering going on in my hot tub! Pool can take it.. but I'll have your gonads off if there's a funky tub at the end of the weekend.

Would the gangplank be ok

I think Rubidoux is Wanking it. I'd ask her first. She's a feisty one.

I would get my cutless out and give her a prod

*Ghengis abandons what he was doing and goes to watch the ensuing carnage*

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By *isaB45Woman over a year ago

Fabville

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Pink gin, Prosecco and I’ll sing....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta"

It’s not real PMF...is it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta"

There's a sauna, room for two. You can sit in there if you like?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

Saaaaaaayy-muthafucking-whaaaaaaat!?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Pink gin, Prosecco and I’ll sing....

I'm having to tolerate all these non-pirate drinks for sing-a-long sea shanties. I'm not happy, but glad you came.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you want some games to break the ice....I have a few up my sleeve

ooo..and ice ... I'll get some ice too

"
ice is good

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By *ohn Wilson96Man over a year ago

from inside your wardrobe

With all these pretty lady pirates at the party, will any of them be doing the "Angry Pirate" lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"With all these pretty lady pirates at the party, will any of them be doing the "Angry Pirate" lol"

Hmmmmm

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs.

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

Saaaaaaayy-muthafucking-whaaaaaaat!?

Whaat? I brought quite a bit ????

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

Saaaaaaayy-muthafucking-whaaaaaaat!?

Whaat? I brought quite a bit ????"

*hiccup*

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By *isaB45Woman over a year ago

Fabville

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

Saaaaaaayy-muthafucking-whaaaaaaat!?

Whaat? I brought quite a bit ????"

It was the Captain....

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I am the treasure

You Smoothie. Are you the Governers Daughter then?

I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk..

"Have some more Deary"

The rum is gone...

Saaaaaaayy-muthafucking-whaaaaaaat!?

Whaat? I brought quite a bit ????

It was the Captain...."

We may be low on coca cola too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs."
yea no probs

I’ll just take a few lady slaves the ones in chains with no clothes on

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs.yea no probs

I’ll just take a few lady slaves the ones in chains with no clothes on "

Provided they agree to it, I've no problem with that.. you may need a few more. I need a second Galleon now. Seems there are two parties now.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs.yea no probs

I’ll just take a few lady slaves the ones in chains with no clothes on

Provided they agree to it, I've no problem with that.. you may need a few more. I need a second Galleon now. Seems there are two parties now."
im on it boss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'd like to come.. dressed like Adam ant

Damn.... I wanted to be Adam ant

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs.yea no probs

I’ll just take a few lady slaves the ones in chains with no clothes on

Provided they agree to it, I've no problem with that.. you may need a few more. I need a second Galleon now. Seems there are two parties now.im on it boss "

Keep that attitude up and there's a bonus keg of grog in it for you matey

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'd like to come.. dressed like Adam ant

Damn.... I wanted to be Adam ant "

Go on then

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By *ot-AshMan over a year ago

London

Ahoy me harties..Is there any hidden treasure to be found at the party arr!...

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"I'd like to come.. dressed like Adam ant

Damn.... I wanted to be Adam ant

Go on then

"
we can be prince charming and the dangly highwayman

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Ahoy me harties..Is there any hidden treasure to be found at the party arr!..."

For you Ash? Always. What drink can I get you before you go treasure hunting?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Aaarrr!! I'll bring my wooden leg and wank the plank."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m a builder so unfortunately I’ll have to wear my builder belt and nail something hard and fast just in case it brakes other than that can I be the parrot

Can you build me a Galleon in my back garden, next to the pool? Before Friday? I'll pay whatever it costs.yea no probs

I’ll just take a few lady slaves the ones in chains with no clothes on

Provided they agree to it, I've no problem with that.. you may need a few more. I need a second Galleon now. Seems there are two parties now.im on it boss

Keep that attitude up and there's a bonus keg of grog in it for you matey

"
io io captain

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta

It’s not real PMF...is it

"
still i aint keen

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta

There's a sauna, room for two. You can sit in there if you like? "
ma im good ta

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Naa i dont like large groups i like to be 1 on 1 with people ta

It’s not real PMF...is it

still i aint keen "

well you're welcome back if you change your mind.

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By *ensuallover1000Man over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I have just one question: This country house mentioned......it isn’t in the County of Midsomer is it?

If so, I’m not venturing there even if paid. It will all end inevitable tears and murder.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I have just one question: This country house mentioned......it isn’t in the County of Midsomer is it?

If so, I’m not venturing there even if paid. It will all end inevitable tears and murder."

No wonder it was so cheap

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By *ot-AshMan over a year ago

London

"Ahoy me harties..Is there any hidden treasure to be found at the party arr!...

For you Ash? Always. What drink can I get you before you go treasure hunting? "

Can ye get me a double rum please me matey...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ah. You're off to Croome after all. Would be an amazing party there

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I would bring the bacon.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Ahoy me harties..Is there any hidden treasure to be found at the party arr!...

For you Ash? Always. What drink can I get you before you go treasure hunting?

Can ye get me a double rum please me matey..."

AARRRRRRRRRR!!! Have a treble

The floor is yours my good man.

This party be ye Oyster, go where thee will. Or share a pew, and share a few.

*Raises his own treble rum to you*

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Ah. You're off to Croome after all. Would be an amazing party there

I've booked it already, just working on the invites.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would bring the bacon."

that's a point.. who is doing the fry up in the morning?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I would bring the bacon.

that's a point.. who is doing the fry up in the morning?

Exactly

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would bring the bacon.

that's a point.. who is doing the fry up in the morning?

Exactly

I'll probably still be awake.. magic ciggy in lip, rum glass in the other.. possibly naked. I'm prepared to start it all off.. but I wouldn't leave me in charge.. I'll need help, I may wander off otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My party trick is getting the party started.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My party trick is getting the party started.

Aaalrighty then.. it starts on Friday.. as soon.. you turn up I guess

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By *rtraymondo76Man over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Aaarrr!! I'll bring my wooden leg and wank the plank.

*walk

I think wank the plank sounds better.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I would bring the bacon.

that's a point.. who is doing the fry up in the morning?

Exactly

https://youtu.be/62eTq8ErUOQ

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would bring the bacon.

that's a point.. who is doing the fry up in the morning?

Exactly

https://youtu.be/62eTq8ErUOQ"

My autobiography

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By *rtraymondo76Man over a year ago

Cheltenham

I've already messaged Robidoux today, but she could help me bury my treasure. Now don't spoil it by asking what or where!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've already messaged Robidoux today, but she could help me bury my treasure. Now don't spoil it by asking what or where!"

You've spoilt it for yourself sailor, you told the crew of your failure! Happens to us all matey... Go get yoursel some grog.

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By *rtraymondo76Man over a year ago

Cheltenham

"I've already messaged Robidoux today, but she could help me bury my treasure. Now don't spoil it by asking what or where!

You've spoilt it for yourself sailor, you told the crew of your failure! Happens to us all matey... Go get yoursel some grog."

Aye, Aye. Cap'n.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I've already messaged Robidoux today, but she could help me bury my treasure. Now don't spoil it by asking what or where!

You've spoilt it for yourself sailor, you told the crew of your failure! Happens to us all matey... Go get yoursel some grog.

Aye, Aye. Cap'n."

Good Man

Plenty more Mermaids in the pool.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My party trick is getting the party started.

Does the carrot have a bandana and eyepatch..

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By *ute Manchester SwingersCouple over a year ago

Manchester

Definitely read the theme as "Pilates "

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Definitely read the theme as "Pilates ""

Come on in

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Shiver me Timbers. Me Cockswain's ordered me Powder Monkey to raise me Jolly Roger. What a Scallywag, that Son of a Biscuit Eater is Three Sheets to the Wind. Feed em all to the Fish ooh-aa-rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I'm giving private lessons on how pirates raised their Jolly Roger. I'm by the pool...naked

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Shiver me Timbers. Me Cockswain's ordered me Powder Monkey to raise me Jolly Roger. What a Scallywag, that Son of a Biscuit Eater is Three Sheets to the Wind. Feed em all to the Fish ooh-aa-rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I'm giving private lessons on how pirates raised their Jolly Roger. I'm by the pool...naked

*Capt. Ghengis's ears prick up, pupils dilate, head bobs like a meerkat and wanders over to the pool in a daze*

"..... Calypso?"

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I bring my smile and bonhomie. I'm already known for greeting and getting people to mingle.

The music has to be ska... and I'll bring the band. I'll try not sustain or inflict any dancing injuries.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I bring my smile and bonhomie. I'm already known for greeting and getting people to mingle.

The music has to be ska... and I'll bring the band. I'll try not sustain or inflict any dancing injuries.

*brought out of his daze by the skippetty beat of the Ska Ghengis boomp-chicka-boomps over to the dance floor all thoughts of women and pirate stuff drifting out of his mind to the rhythm of the beat.

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By *rivateparts!Man over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

You got a spare corner for me to sit in

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By *uxom redCouple over a year ago

Shrewsbury

I treasure chest cake.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You got a spare corner for me to sit in "

Fill yer boots.. pint o rum over there waiting for you

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