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We speak up
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'We speak up' is the tag line for this year's White Ribbon Day on 25th November, preceded by International Men's day on 19th.
Just out of interest, how many of the men here are aware of White Ribbon Day and what is asked of them?
What are your thoughts on it?
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Please don't DM me. If you have something to say, post in the thread.
By the way, it's interesting that you think that men speaking out against violence towards women and girls is virtue signalling, rather than addressing a very real and increasing problem in the UK. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention. |
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"I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention."
I would imagine there's an element of researching each one and evaluating whether it's one with which a person wishes to support. A bit of personal agency.
This one was started in 1991 in Canada after a misogynistic attack. The UK charity was established in 2004.
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
I'd like to think that all the men professing to be protecting the women and children in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating.  |
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"I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention.
I would imagine there's an element of researching each one and evaluating whether it's one with which a person wishes to support. A bit of personal agency.
This one was started in 1991 in Canada after a misogynistic attack. The UK charity was established in 2004.
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
I'd like to think that all the men professing to be protecting the women and children in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating. "
What were you doing on the 15th of March? |
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"
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
You make it sound like those two things are connected...
"
If more men called out other men for inappropriate behaviour, then there probably would be less violence towards women and girls.
The Dear Daddy film on YouTube might help. |
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"I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention.
I would imagine there's an element of researching each one and evaluating whether it's one with which a person wishes to support. A bit of personal agency.
This one was started in 1991 in Canada after a misogynistic attack. The UK charity was established in 2004.
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
I'd like to think that all the men professing to be protecting the women and children in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating.
What were you doing on the 15th of March?"
World Consumer Rights Day?
Hungarian National Day?
Constitution day in Belarus? |
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"If more men called out other men for inappropriate behaviour, then there probably would be less violence towards women and girls."
We're in this weird situation where men are clearly responsible for violence to women, but men aren't allowed to have an opinion on how to reduce it. Women clearly best understand the impact of violence, but ask most women why some men do these things, and they'll say "I really don't have a clue - it's a complete mystery to me".
So while I'd agree with your statement above, the key question is how do we get there, and just shouting at people isn't going to make them change.
So here's the thing. I actually live in the sort of society that you want. None of my male friends have ever made a comment that gives the slightest implication that violence towards women is acceptable, nor have any of their female partners shown the slightest sign of being victims. I'm not saying that it never happens amongst the sort of people I've known, just that there has never, ever been something for me to call out. We all know that expressing a pro-violence opinion would get us rapidly shunned.
Now you may say that that's because I come from a privileged, well educated background. And you wouldn't be far wrong, but I do occasionally get out beyond my friendship group, and I have to say it's a pretty scary place. The big thing that strikes me is just how acceptable violence in general is to most people.
So you get macho posing like "if someone touches one of my children, I'd kill him". Which is really saying you'd put yourself before your children, because the last thing that they would need is you getting locked up as well. I'm not saying that killing them isn't justified, just that vengeance shouldn't be your top priority.
And boxing. How is that even a thing?
But the really strange thing is that the glorification of violence in general seems to come as much from women as men.
A lot of women seem to be attracted to macho posing. Why is it acceptable to say "I've always had a thing for bastards"?
And the truth is that most young men are VERY focused on getting laid. So you have to ask why do so many young men think that their best chance of succeeding with women is to be macho and violent? And the really uncomfortable answer is that they're probably right.
So there you go. Now you can shout me down because I'm just a man, or you can wrongly accuse me of victim shaming (to make it clear, no woman deserves this).
And you can carry on shouting and ignoring male voices, and nothing will change.
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I'm not sure why you think men can't have an opinion on how to reduce violence towards women, or provide suggestions on the topic.
I think most women will have an idea as to why it happens. 1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime. It's a lived experience for many.
I also don't understand why you think anyone is shouting?
Have you seen the 'dating coaches' on the Internet? One man claims that men should date women 1/3 of their body weight, so that the woman knows he could end her life at any time. This is dating advice???? And that's only one of many dating coaches spewing misogyny and patriarchy.
There are a number of serial victims of domestic abuse, but there are many reasons behind that - the argument that women are attracted to bad boys oversimplifies the situation and is very damaging, and dare I say it? Smacks of victim blaming.
I'm happy that you are in a position where you have no need to challenge your friends about inappropriate comments or behaviours. That's how it should be.
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"I'm not sure why you think men can't have an opinion on how to reduce violence towards women, or provide suggestions on the topic."
Good!
"I think most women will have an idea as to why it happens. 1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime. It's a lived experience for many. "
This is one of those modern fallacies. Being a victim of something does not make you an expert on why it happened. If I'm walking down the road and someone hits me with a fish, it doesn't suddenly make me an expert on why people hit people with fish.
Also, if 75% of women are "lucky" enough not to experience domestic violence, then it's probably true that most men haven't committed it. So be wary of stereotyping statements about men - you want to keep the good guys on board.
"I also don't understand why you think anyone is shouting?"
If you don't think anyone is shouting about domestic violence, then you haven't been listening!
"Have you seen the 'dating coaches' on the Internet? One man claims that men should date women 1/3 of their body weight, so that the woman knows he could end her life at any time. This is dating advice???? And that's only one of many dating coaches spewing misogyny and patriarchy."
Given what I said about my social circle, do you really think that I ever read that stuff? (-:
But the really key question is why does it exist? I don't think that they're creating a new problem, they're just reflecting one that has long existed. In a society where violence is glorified, is it really that surprising?
"the argument that women are attracted to bad boys oversimplifies the situation and is very damaging, and dare I say it? Smacks of victim blaming. "
Perhaps, but that wasn't what I said. What I said was that women who say that it's fun to be attracted to bastards should be called out.
I share the same end goals as you, but I'm not an "ally", because that seems to involve mindlessly accepting whatever women say is the cause of domestic violence, even when I don't agree. |
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"1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime."
Given that the definition of "domestic abuse" includes having a stand up argument with your partner, I'm surprised the figure is that low. |
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"I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention.
I would imagine there's an element of researching each one and evaluating whether it's one with which a person wishes to support. A bit of personal agency.
This one was started in 1991 in Canada after a misogynistic attack. The UK charity was established in 2004.
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
I'd like to think that all the men professing to be protecting the women and children in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating.
What were you doing on the 15th of March?
World Consumer Rights Day?
Hungarian National Day?
Constitution day in Belarus? "
International day to combat Islamophobia, a United nations designated day.
I'd like to think that all the people professing to be against Islamophobia in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating  |
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"I think people have become totally numb to these things.
Hardly a day goes by that isn’t “International XYZ Day”.
At one time there were just a few of them but now every charity and corporate wants to cash in on this or that day.
I’m not saying that the causes aren’t worthy but with so many of them happening all the time it’s difficult to pay any of them much attention.
I would imagine there's an element of researching each one and evaluating whether it's one with which a person wishes to support. A bit of personal agency.
This one was started in 1991 in Canada after a misogynistic attack. The UK charity was established in 2004.
21 years of this campaign and male violence towards women and girls is increasing.
I'd like to think that all the men professing to be protecting the women and children in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating.
What were you doing on the 15th of March?
World Consumer Rights Day?
Hungarian National Day?
Constitution day in Belarus?
International day to combat Islamophobia, a United nations designated day.
I'd like to think that all the people professing to be against Islamophobia in the UK would have already known about this and proudly be participating "
So start a thread to promote it |
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"Never heard of it.
What is it?
It's for men to be allies for women and girls, showing support against violence by men towards women and girls. "
I wonder how many fifth columnists, double agents and traitors will turn out to be amongst the ranks? |
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"1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime.
Given that the definition of "domestic abuse" includes having a stand up argument with your partner, I'm surprised the figure is that low. "
Most people wouldn't say a verbal argument with their partner is domestic abuse, but Home Office counting rules and all that. 🤷
The 1 in 4 figure comes from research by Refuge. |
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"
What were you doing on the 15th of March?
World Consumer Rights Day?
Hungarian National Day?
Constitution day in Belarus?
...and,of course, Stab Caesar in the Back Day!"
Beware, the ides of March! |
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"1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse in their lifetime."
"Given that the definition of "domestic abuse" includes having a stand up argument with your partner, I'm surprised the figure is that low."
"Most people wouldn't say a verbal argument with their partner is domestic abuse, but Home Office counting rules and all that."
"The 1 in 4 figure comes from research by Refuge."
Refuge didn't do any research of their own, they are using the ONS figures, which includes 'argument = domestic abuse'. |
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The definition of domestic abuse used by the ONS is the legal definition from the Domestic Abuse Act 2021...
1 Definition of “domestic abuse”
(1) This section defines “domestic abuse” for the purposes of this Act.
(2) Behaviour of a person (“A”) towards another person (“B”) is “domestic abuse” if—
(a) A and B are each aged 16 or over and are personally connected to each other, and
(b) the behaviour is abusive.
(3) Behaviour is “abusive” if it consists of any of the following—
(a) physical or sexual abuse;
(b) violent or threatening behaviour;
(c) controlling or coercive behaviour;
(d) economic abuse (see subsection (4));
(e) psychological, emotional or other abuse;
and it does not matter whether the behaviour consists of a single incident or a course of conduct.
(4) “Economic abuse” means any behaviour that has a substantial adverse effect on B's ability to—
(a) acquire, use or maintain money or other property, or
(b) obtain goods or services.
(5) For the purposes of this Act A's behaviour may be behaviour “towards” B despite the fact that it consists of conduct directed at another person (for example, B's child). |
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"The definition of domestic abuse used by the ONS is the legal definition from the Domestic Abuse Act 2021...
1 Definition of “domestic abuse”
(1) This section defines “domestic abuse” for the purposes of this Act.
(2) Behaviour of a person (“A”) towards another person (“B”) is “domestic abuse” if—
(a) A and B are each aged 16 or over and are personally connected to each other, and
(b) the behaviour is abusive.
(3) Behaviour is “abusive” if it consists of any of the following—
(a) physical or sexual abuse;
(b) violent or threatening behaviour;
(c) controlling or coercive behaviour;
(d) economic abuse (see subsection (4));
(e) psychological, emotional or other abuse;
and it does not matter whether the behaviour consists of a single incident or a course of conduct.
(4) “Economic abuse” means any behaviour that has a substantial adverse effect on B's ability to—
(a) acquire, use or maintain money or other property, or
(b) obtain goods or services.
(5) For the purposes of this Act A's behaviour may be behaviour “towards” B despite the fact that it consists of conduct directed at another person (for example, B's child)."
We can always rely on Fabs very own Mr Wiki-Google. |
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"The definition of domestic abuse used by the ONS is the legal definition from the Domestic Abuse Act 2021..."
And how are you determining that? Given that the ONS don't publish the questions in the CSEW, what leads you to believe that they used that particular definition? |
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"And how are you determining that? Given that the ONS don't publish the questions in the CSEW, what leads you to believe that they used that particular definition?"
I typed ons definition of domestic abuse into google and the AI overview said...
"The Office for National Statistics (ONS) defines domestic abuse as any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive, threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial, or emotional) between adults aged 16 and over who are or have been intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexuality. Children who see, hear, or experience the effects of this behaviour are also considered victims under the Domestic Abuse Act 2021. "
But I don't rely on AI so I clicked on the first link which was to the following ONS page on the matter...
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bulletins/domesticabuseinenglandandwalesoverview/november2023
It gives Crime Survey estimates of about two million people experiencing domestic abuse a year. Then looks at police recordings, charges and convictions.
It explicitly references the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 so I then looked that up and copied and pasted the legal definition of what domestic abuse is.
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** Reposting with a truncated gov.uk link as the full one messed up the formatting **
"And how are you determining that? Given that the ONS don't publish the questions in the CSEW, what leads you to believe that they used that particular definition?"
I typed ons definition of domestic abuse into google and the AI overview said...
"The Office for National Statistics (ONS) defines domestic abuse as any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive, threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial, or emotional) between adults aged 16 and over who are or have been intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexuality. Children who see, hear, or experience the effects of this behaviour are also considered victims under the Domestic Abuse Act 2021. "
But I don't rely on AI so I clicked on the first link which was to the following ONS page on the matter...
https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bull...
It gives Crime Survey estimates of about two million people experiencing domestic abuse a year. Then looks at police recordings, charges and convictions.
It explicitly references the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 so I then looked that up and copied and pasted the legal definition of what domestic abuse is.
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"If you google ONS Domestic abuse in England and Wales overview: November 2024 you'll find a more detailed and up-to-date report."
I know, I've read it. I've also read the methodology statements, which give no detail on which questions were asked, or how "have experienced domestic abuse" is defined. |
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Let's be clear. The police will record a verbal argument between partners and certain family members due to home office counting rules. That doesn't mean the people involved believe any abuse was involved.
I was hoping that the ONS would publish the actual questions, but I suspect they had their reasons for not doing so.
However, the ONS data is probably more reliable, for the reasons above.
No matter where the data comes from, the fact remains that domestic abuse is gendered disproportionally with women as victims of men.
So how do we address this?
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"No matter where the data comes from, the fact remains that domestic abuse is gendered disproportionally with women as victims of men.
So how do we address this?"
We don't.
I don't believe that there is something inherent in men that causes them to beat up women. In my view this is physically strong (but mentally weak) people beating up someone less physically strong. Unless you're proposing eugenics, you can't change the way humans are built. If there are still mentally weak people that take out their frustrations on their partners, there will always be disproportionately more men dishing out the violence.
To make my point clear, we can address the issue of domestic violence and reduce the amount of it, but we can't change the fact that women will disproportionately be victims of men. |
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"No matter where the data comes from, the fact remains that domestic abuse is gendered disproportionally with women as victims of men.
So how do we address this?
We don't.
I don't believe that there is something inherent in men that causes them to beat up women. In my view this is physically strong (but mentally weak) people beating up someone less physically strong. Unless you're proposing eugenics, you can't change the way humans are built. If there are still mentally weak people that take out their frustrations on their partners, there will always be disproportionately more men dishing out the violence.
To make my point clear, we can address the issue of domestic violence and reduce the amount of it, but we can't change the fact that women will disproportionately be victims of men. "
Reducing the amount of domestic abuse towards women is the aim. I'm not naive enough to think that it will ever be eradicated, but the numbers keep increasing.
White Ribbon is about men acknowledging the issue and pledging to challenge any negative comments or behaviours about or towards women. By showing other men that what they are doing is not OK, that at least is a starting point. |
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By *rFilthMan 31 weeks ago
Rossendale |
Is the violence towards women raising in domestic violence or more on the street?
There seems to be a bit of a correlation towards violence towards girls and women increasing all across Europe in all the countries that have high levels of non European immigration. You know people who have had completely different backgrounds, can have completely different outlooks on life!
There’s a whole can of worms with this but western men are a lot more timid than 20 30 years ago so i doubt the violence is increasing from them! |
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"I know, I've read it. I've also read the methodology statements, which give no detail on which questions were asked, or how "have experienced domestic abuse" is defined."
The 2023-24 Crime Survey for England and Wales Adult Questionnaire is published by the UK Data Service and is available online. Although it took me multiple attempts to find.
It's a PDF file so the forum rules won't allow me to share a link.
It's 408 pages and pretty complex but if you download it and search for abuse you will see the specific and detailed questions asked.
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"Is the violence towards women raising in domestic violence or more on the street?
There seems to be a bit of a correlation towards violence towards girls and women increasing all across Europe in all the countries that have high levels of non European immigration. You know people who have had completely different backgrounds, can have completely different outlooks on life!
There’s a whole can of worms with this but western men are a lot more timid than 20 30 years ago so i doubt the violence is increasing from them! "
There is no data on how many asylum seekers or refugees are responsible for any of the stranger assaults, because the legal citizenship is not recorded.
Stranger incidents are amongst the lowest number of assaults against women and girls - they are far more likely to be assaulted by an intimate or ex intimate partner than anyone else.
There is also a correlation between the number of rioters last summer who were arrested and had also had reports against them for domestic abuse.
Correlation is not the same as causation. |
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By *otMe66Man 31 weeks ago
Terra Firma |
"Is the violence towards women raising in domestic violence or more on the street?
There seems to be a bit of a correlation towards violence towards girls and women increasing all across Europe in all the countries that have high levels of non European immigration. You know people who have had completely different backgrounds, can have completely different outlooks on life!
There’s a whole can of worms with this but western men are a lot more timid than 20 30 years ago so i doubt the violence is increasing from them!
There is no data on how many asylum seekers or refugees are responsible for any of the stranger assaults, because the legal citizenship is not recorded.
Stranger incidents are amongst the lowest number of assaults against women and girls - they are far more likely to be assaulted by an intimate or ex intimate partner than anyone else.
There is also a correlation between the number of rioters last summer who were arrested and had also had reports against them for domestic abuse.
Correlation is not the same as causation. "
The rioters: Likely to be from disruptive and troubled backgrounds, male and female.
How many of the reports were alleged reports from partners, how many were actual convictions for assault, and what was the ratio of male to female victims in the reports?
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"Reducing the amount of domestic abuse towards women is the aim. I'm not naive enough to think that it will ever be eradicated, but the numbers keep increasing."
But are the numbers increasing because more of it is happening, or is it just that more of it is being reported? |
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"The 2023-24 Crime Survey for England and Wales Adult Questionnaire is published by the UK Data Service and is available online. Although it took me multiple attempts to find.
It's a PDF file so the forum rules won't allow me to share a link.
It's 408 pages and pretty complex but if you download it and search for abuse you will see the specific and detailed questions asked."
I finally managed to find it.
Thanks for the help. |
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By *d4ugirlsMan 31 weeks ago
Green Cove Springs |
"The definition of domestic abuse used by the ONS is the legal definition from the Domestic Abuse Act 2021...
1 Definition of “domestic abuse”
(1) This section defines “domestic abuse” for the purposes of this Act.
(2) Behaviour of a person (“A”) towards another person (“B”) is “domestic abuse” if—
(a) A and B are each aged 16 or over and are personally connected to each other, and
(b) the behaviour is abusive.
(3) Behaviour is “abusive” if it consists of any of the following—
(a) physical or sexual abuse;
(b) violent or threatening behaviour;
(c) controlling or coercive behaviour;
(d) economic abuse (see subsection (4));
(e) psychological, emotional or other abuse;
and it does not matter whether the behaviour consists of a single incident or a course of conduct.
(4) “Economic abuse” means any behaviour that has a substantial adverse effect on B's ability to—
(a) acquire, use or maintain money or other property, or
(b) obtain goods or services.
(5) For the purposes of this Act A's behaviour may be behaviour “towards” B despite the fact that it consists of conduct directed at another person (for example, B's child)."
Perfect, ground work has been set to shove digital currency and upcoming bank withdrawal policies up the guvernmant backside. |
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"If more men called out other men for inappropriate behaviour, then there probably would be less violence towards women and girls.
We're in this weird situation where men are clearly responsible for violence to women, but men aren't allowed to have an opinion on how to reduce it. Women clearly best understand the impact of violence, but ask most women why some men do these things, and they'll say "I really don't have a clue - it's a complete mystery to me".
So while I'd agree with your statement above, the key question is how do we get there, and just shouting at people isn't going to make them change.
So here's the thing. I actually live in the sort of society that you want. None of my male friends have ever made a comment that gives the slightest implication that violence towards women is acceptable, nor have any of their female partners shown the slightest sign of being victims. I'm not saying that it never happens amongst the sort of people I've known, just that there has never, ever been something for me to call out. We all know that expressing a pro-violence opinion would get us rapidly shunned.
Now you may say that that's because I come from a privileged, well educated background. And you wouldn't be far wrong, but I do occasionally get out beyond my friendship group, and I have to say it's a pretty scary place. The big thing that strikes me is just how acceptable violence in general is to most people.
So you get macho posing like "if someone touches one of my children, I'd kill him". Which is really saying you'd put yourself before your children, because the last thing that they would need is you getting locked up as well. I'm not saying that killing them isn't justified, just that vengeance shouldn't be your top priority.
And boxing. How is that even a thing?
But the really strange thing is that the glorification of violence in general seems to come as much from women as men.
A lot of women seem to be attracted to macho posing. Why is it acceptable to say "I've always had a thing for bastards"?
And the truth is that most young men are VERY focused on getting laid. So you have to ask why do so many young men think that their best chance of succeeding with women is to be macho and violent? And the really uncomfortable answer is that they're probably right.
So there you go. Now you can shout me down because I'm just a man, or you can wrongly accuse me of victim shaming (to make it clear, no woman deserves this).
And you can carry on shouting and ignoring male voices, and nothing will change.
"
What the fuck has boxing got to do with men abusing women you absolute snob? |
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I think anyone would be hard pushed to argue that domestic abuse and violence towards women and girls is not heavily gendered, in that the majority of perpetrators are men and boys.
So, what can be done?
Should anything be done?
If so, who should do it? |
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By *iseekingbiCouple 31 weeks ago
N ireland and West Midlands |
"Please don't DM me. If you have something to say, post in the thread.
By the way, it's interesting that you think that men speaking out against violence towards women and girls is virtue signalling, rather than addressing a very real and increasing problem in the UK. "
Wow! Really? Utterly shocking, rather than interesting. I'm glad you outed him here. |
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"
...
What the fuck has boxing got to do with men abusing women you absolute snob?"
Could it be something to do with the message it gives out that physically assaulting another person is OK if you disguise it as a sport? |
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"Please don't DM me. If you have something to say, post in the thread.
By the way, it's interesting that you think that men speaking out against violence towards women and girls is virtue signalling, rather than addressing a very real and increasing problem in the UK."
"Wow! Really? Utterly shocking, rather than interesting. I'm glad you outed him here."
They didn't out him (because that would be against forum rules). We have no idea who it was. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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Quite a sexist thread.
Personally, I'd be more inclined to get on board with something to raise awareness to humans about being abusive and violent to other humans. Genderising the issue creates more division, and adds fuel to the narrative around 'toxic' masculinity... whatever that is.
I've seen and received more than my own fair share of toxic femininity over my years. But nobody ever seems to raise awareness of the ways women are perpetrators of men. It's more subtle, but it absolutely exists more abundantly than people care to see, and with equally damaging consequences.
We're all victims and perpetrators, regardless of gender.
If we have to genderise it, Then I'd perhaps like to raise awareness of violence of men towards men as much as men towards women. I've been on the receiving end of two unprovoked attacks in 3 years (one an attempted mugging, and one random man who came out of nowhere wanting to "knock me out" - yesterday in fact). Both were fucking scary, and both had a psychological impact. I've had a knife put to my throat by a total stranger. As far as I'm aware, both my mother and sister have never come remotely close to the potential violence I have. They get the privilege of white ribbon day, I get a crime number.
Violence is violence, no matter who is perpetrating, and who is receiving. It all needs to stop. All of it. |
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"Quite a sexist thread.
Personally, I'd be more inclined to get on board with something to raise awareness to humans about being abusive and violent to other humans. Genderising the issue creates more division, and adds fuel to the narrative around 'toxic' masculinity... whatever that is.
I've seen and received more than my own fair share of toxic femininity over my years. But nobody ever seems to raise awareness of the ways women are perpetrators of men. It's more subtle, but it absolutely exists more abundantly than people care to see, and with equally damaging consequences.
We're all victims and perpetrators, regardless of gender.
If we have to genderise it, Then I'd perhaps like to raise awareness of violence of men towards men as much as men towards women. I've been on the receiving end of two unprovoked attacks in 3 years (one an attempted mugging, and one random man who came out of nowhere wanting to "knock me out" - yesterday in fact). Both were fucking scary, and both had a psychological impact. I've had a knife put to my throat by a total stranger. As far as I'm aware, both my mother and sister have never come remotely close to the potential violence I have. They get the privilege of white ribbon day, I get a crime number.
Violence is violence, no matter who is perpetrating, and who is receiving. It all needs to stop. All of it. "
I agree, that it would be beneficial to address all forms of violence.
No one is saying that men are not abused by women, but the facts are that it is skewed the opposite way.
Additionally, the majority of violence towards men is by men.
What's the common denominator? |
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