FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Fabswingers in the news
Fabswingers in the news
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"Don't see it anywhere" There's a video report on it, about coercion within married couples on the site. Was only posted 10 or so mins ago | |||
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"We have reported safe guarding concerns several times and had no response and the concern remains. We have said they need to do more on this to keep people safe. Time to take things seriously Fab. Will wait for this post to be taken down and account deleted by admin as they will listen to this comment i bet and take action. Screenshots are a wonderful thing.👍" I know someone who got a permanent ban from the forum as they said Fab was only interested in the money and not safety | |||
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"Its on now expect lots of new people here tomorrow " My thoughts exactly. | |||
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"Those that complain get banned, those who abuse, get away with it. Like others, I know of a few females who have been hounded off the site." Complaining gets you banned?  | |||
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"Those that complain get banned, those who abuse, get away with it. Like others, I know of a few females who have been hounded off the site. Complaining gets you banned? "Quite often yes, some moderators on here are real clipboard warriors | |||
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"I'm listened to the 1st episode of the podcast. In it, this website provides a statement that when they are made aware of non consensual acts, it's a priority of theirs to cooperate with the police. The police told me that they didn't receive cooperation in my case. Moreover, the police said they had zero expectation of any cooperation. Instead, I provided the evidence, which was believed, acted upon, and the man arrested. He admitted his guilt, thankfully, because he hadn't thought he'd done anything wrong. CPS felt differently. The crime was stalking. Because we'd met on here, and there had been sexual contact, the crime was labelled as domestic abuse, which didn't sit well with me. We weren't in a relationship, a situationship, or were even FWB. I'm grateful I didn't have to testify, but I was prepared to. This dumbass thought he could terrorise me, and that I'd be too ashamed or embarrassed to report everything to the police. He was wrong. And found guilty. But I got no support from this site. " That is absolutely shocking! Lots of weirdos on here and plenty of misogynists that don’t give a shit if they upset! | |||
"I'm listened to the 1st episode of the podcast. In it, this website provides a statement that when they are made aware of non consensual acts, it's a priority of theirs to cooperate with the police. The police told me that they didn't receive cooperation in my case. Moreover, the police said they had zero expectation of any cooperation. Instead, I provided the evidence, which was believed, acted upon, and the man arrested. He admitted his guilt, thankfully, because he hadn't thought he'd done anything wrong. CPS felt differently. The crime was stalking. Because we'd met on here, and there had been sexual contact, the crime was labelled as domestic abuse, which didn't sit well with me. We weren't in a relationship, a situationship, or were even FWB. I'm grateful I didn't have to testify, but I was prepared to. This dumbass thought he could terrorise me, and that I'd be too ashamed or embarrassed to report everything to the police. He was wrong. And found guilty. But I got no support from this site. " So sorry to hear that, some blokes on here are just full on arseholes. And it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that you received no support from this site, as long as folk pay their subscriptions, that's all they are worried about. So many bots on here too | |||
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"Having seen this thread, read the report, and podcast... I'm no longer content being associated with this website. " Your seeing 1 situation. 1 report. One side of it also. More importantly, 1 situation where even she said she was acting enthusiastic to meet. I hardly find that to be a true reflection of this site, or what most of us want from here. You get bad people in every walk of life sadly. | |||
"Having seen this thread, read the report, and podcast... I'm no longer content being associated with this website. " Bye bye | |||
"Having seen this thread, read the report, and podcast... I'm no longer content being associated with this website. Your seeing 1 situation. 1 report. One side of it also. More importantly, 1 situation where even she said she was acting enthusiastic to meet. I hardly find that to be a true reflection of this site, or what most of us want from here. You get bad people in every walk of life sadly. " I think it's important to state that the woman who is the subject of the podcast has stated that the prosecution took some messages out of context. The full situation was that sometimes she felt she had to perform a role play of acting enthusiastic. There are texts to her abuser saying "How do you want me to answer? The real answer or the role play one?" | |||
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"Those that complain get banned, those who abuse, get away with it. Like others, I know of a few females who have been hounded off the site. Complaining gets you banned?
Quite often yes, some moderators on here are real clipboard warriors "who uses a clipboard on line- should that not be keyboard?  | |||
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"I think as adults we all need to take accountability for our own actions , I get she feels a certain way about events that happened and going by the story that's been told could might well have been a coersive relationship , but its only one side of the story that being told . The CPS didn't feel there was enough to charge the ex and I get that can be complex ..however .. She willingly went to and had sex with multiple men , she even arranged meets by herself and videod it .Having regrets after the fact doesn't mean she was coerced... All to often its easier to put the blame onto a guy rather than take accountability for your own actions .She was active on the site as part of the couple and as playing solo doing "hotwife" meets. .. It doesn't quite add up for me . there's always 3 sides to a story , theirs , the ex and the somewhere in the middle. kinda screams shady when shes sold a story and now on a podcast making money from the said story ." It's hard on here to agree to that kind of opinion without getting pelters, but I agree. Having read the story, she was doing 4 a day. Sorry, that's not taking one for the team! Definitely not a good situation for her in any way, but this does seem like a strong case of regret. As she was not technically swinging (she was hotwifing and dogging), What she was doing could have been done via any hook up site. | |||
"I'm listened to the 1st episode of the podcast. In it, this website provides a statement that when they are made aware of non consensual acts, it's a priority of theirs to cooperate with the police. The police told me that they didn't receive cooperation in my case. Moreover, the police said they had zero expectation of any cooperation. " There's a well established process through which we assist the police when we receive a lawful request. It's not an optional thing that we can choose not to co-operate with. If the request is lawful, we have to (and do) comply, so the information you have seemingly been given about our apparent lack of co-operation in your case, is not correct. The legislation underlying this is the Investigatory Powers Act 2016 and the full legislation is here: https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2016/25/contents Admin | |||
"I'm listened to the 1st episode of the podcast. In it, this website provides a statement that when they are made aware of non consensual acts, it's a priority of theirs to cooperate with the police. The police told me that they didn't receive cooperation in my case. Moreover, the police said they had zero expectation of any cooperation. There's a well established process through which we assist the police when we receive a lawful request. It's not an optional thing that we can choose not to co-operate with. If the request is lawful, we have to (and do) comply, so the information you have seemingly been given about our apparent lack of co-operation in your case, is not correct. The legislation underlying this is the Investigatory Powers Act 2016 and the full legislation is here: https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2016/25/contents Admin"  | |||
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"I think as adults we all need to take accountability for our own actions , I get she feels a certain way about events that happened and going by the story that's been told could might well have been a coersive relationship , but its only one side of the story that being told . The CPS didn't feel there was enough to charge the ex and I get that can be complex ..however .. She willingly went to and had sex with multiple men , she even arranged meets by herself and videod it .Having regrets after the fact doesn't mean she was coerced... All to often its easier to put the blame onto a guy rather than take accountability for your own actions .She was active on the site as part of the couple and as playing solo doing "hotwife" meets. .. It doesn't quite add up for me . there's always 3 sides to a story , theirs , the ex and the somewhere in the middle. kinda screams shady when shes sold a story and now on a podcast making money from the said story ." I think this view is really backwards. It’s so easy to judge her actions from the outside but that overlooks the emotional abuse and manipulation that takes place in these kinds of relationships. I’ve sadly witnessed domestic abuse and how it can make the victims act in ways and do things they never would have done because they’ve become so desperate to please and scared of their partner at the same time. Even if she did end up enjoying some of those experiences, it doesn’t change the fact that she was coerced into this lifestyle by a man who was abusing her. Also, she’s not making money. People don’t get paid to talk to journalists, least of all the BBC who are publicly funded. The amount of ignorance and victim blaming I’ve seen on here about this poor woman is really alarming. Its clear from the article that the husband is at fault, but also that this site is not doing enough to keep women safe on here. | |||
"I think as adults we all need to take accountability for our own actions , I get she feels a certain way about events that happened and going by the story that's been told could might well have been a coersive relationship , but its only one side of the story that being told . The CPS didn't feel there was enough to charge the ex and I get that can be complex ..however .. She willingly went to and had sex with multiple men , she even arranged meets by herself and videod it .Having regrets after the fact doesn't mean she was coerced... All to often its easier to put the blame onto a guy rather than take accountability for your own actions .She was active on the site as part of the couple and as playing solo doing "hotwife" meets. .. It doesn't quite add up for me . there's always 3 sides to a story , theirs , the ex and the somewhere in the middle. kinda screams shady when shes sold a story and now on a podcast making money from the said story . I think this view is really backwards. It’s so easy to judge her actions from the outside but that overlooks the emotional abuse and manipulation that takes place in these kinds of relationships. I’ve sadly witnessed domestic abuse and how it can make the victims act in ways and do things they never would have done because they’ve become so desperate to please and scared of their partner at the same time. Even if she did end up enjoying some of those experiences, it doesn’t change the fact that she was coerced into this lifestyle by a man who was abusing her. Also, she’s not making money. People don’t get paid to talk to journalists, least of all the BBC who are publicly funded. The amount of ignorance and victim blaming I’ve seen on here about this poor woman is really alarming. Its clear from the article that the husband is at fault, but also that this site is not doing enough to keep women safe on here. " There is nothing ignorant about my view . There is one side of a story being told and from a biased perspective .I have witnessed domestic violence so to assume otherwise is ignorant . Emotional abuse or any other kind of abuse is damaging i agree ... however its one persons word this took place .. I have however also witnessed the toll it takes on a man being accused falsely by a vindictive , spiteful woman because of regret in there actions after the fact .. its so much easier for a woman to be believed than a man because automatically women are believed victims .. Having regret after the fact doesnt make a victim , sometimes we have to live with the decisions and action we make in this life . There wasnt a case to answer with the police and CPS , perhaps theres a reason for that , the news channels and media outlets love a salacious and sensationalist headline especially when it comes to the alternative sexual lifestyle . | |||
" , but also that this site is not doing enough to keep women safe on here. " Also how is it that we are not responsible for our own safety , its not down to fabswingers to keep us safe , its down to us ourselves , we are responsible for our own lives not a website. | |||
" , but also that this site is not doing enough to keep women safe on here. Also how is it that we are not responsible for our own safety , its not down to fabswingers to keep us safe , its down to us ourselves , we are responsible for our own lives not a website. " it’s called safeguarding. we all have a responsibility to safeguard each other from harm when we encounter it, and that includes fabswingers. | |||
"I think as adults we all need to take accountability for our own actions , I get she feels a certain way about events that happened and going by the story that's been told could might well have been a coersive relationship , but its only one side of the story that being told . The CPS didn't feel there was enough to charge the ex and I get that can be complex ..however .. She willingly went to and had sex with multiple men , she even arranged meets by herself and videod it .Having regrets after the fact doesn't mean she was coerced... All to often its easier to put the blame onto a guy rather than take accountability for your own actions .She was active on the site as part of the couple and as playing solo doing "hotwife" meets. .. It doesn't quite add up for me . there's always 3 sides to a story , theirs , the ex and the somewhere in the middle. kinda screams shady when shes sold a story and now on a podcast making money from the said story . I think this view is really backwards. It’s so easy to judge her actions from the outside but that overlooks the emotional abuse and manipulation that takes place in these kinds of relationships. I’ve sadly witnessed domestic abuse and how it can make the victims act in ways and do things they never would have done because they’ve become so desperate to please and scared of their partner at the same time. Even if she did end up enjoying some of those experiences, it doesn’t change the fact that she was coerced into this lifestyle by a man who was abusing her. Also, she’s not making money. People don’t get paid to talk to journalists, least of all the BBC who are publicly funded. The amount of ignorance and victim blaming I’ve seen on here about this poor woman is really alarming. Its clear from the article that the husband is at fault, but also that this site is not doing enough to keep women safe on here. There is nothing ignorant about my view . There is one side of a story being told and from a biased perspective .I have witnessed domestic violence so to assume otherwise is ignorant . Emotional abuse or any other kind of abuse is damaging i agree ... however its one persons word this took place .. I have however also witnessed the toll it takes on a man being accused falsely by a vindictive , spiteful woman because of regret in there actions after the fact .. its so much easier for a woman to be believed than a man because automatically women are believed victims .. Having regret after the fact doesnt make a victim , sometimes we have to live with the decisions and action we make in this life . There wasnt a case to answer with the police and CPS , perhaps theres a reason for that , the news channels and media outlets love a salacious and sensationalist headline especially when it comes to the alternative sexual lifestyle ." women aren’t automatically believed as victims though. false reports account for less than 1% of all r*pe allegations, but 95% of r*pists are never convicted, most never even facing trial. thats partially because the way the law and the burden of evidence work in this country does not favour victims of sexual / domestic violence. its a systemic issue. but the data suggests that false allegations are exceedingly rare, while (at least) 1 in 3 women experience sexual assault at some point in their lives. i do agree that the taboo nature of swinging and alternative sexual lifestyles is a juicy topic and the media will sensationalise that aspect. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t believe victims when they come forward. | |||
" women aren’t automatically believed as victims though. false reports account for less than 1% of all r*pe allegations, but 95% of r*pists are never convicted, most never even facing trial. thats partially because the way the law and the burden of evidence work in this country does not favour victims of sexual / domestic violence. its a systemic issue. but the data suggests that false allegations are exceedingly rare, while (at least) 1 in 3 women experience sexual assault at some point in their lives. i do agree that the taboo nature of swinging and alternative sexual lifestyles is a juicy topic and the media will sensationalise that aspect. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t believe victims when they come forward. " So what about men who are victims of false allegations are they just to be thrown to the wolves.This is a report of a stranger ,Who we dont know and to me there's flaws in her own statements . She spoke about the men abusing her body on meets giving her sti's and also becoming pregnant but she consented with the men who was participating with and put herself in the situation of sex without protection as she was doing solo meets. The burden of blame lies at her feet for that . We are all responsible for our own sexual health and safety. What I took from the story was she entered into the swinging lifestyle the ins and out of her relationship only her and her ex know , but seems shes living with alot of regret for choices she made but instead of owning it the blames purely been shifted at the feet of her ex . As far as women aren't believed thats no true , I agree getting convictions is hard but shes got people from here who dont know her leaping to her defence seems like shes believed to me . We all join this site knowing what it is about so why is it down to the site to safeguard us . Its a way of swingers primarily to get intouch with each other and partake in it any way we want to but ,we are all adults and our safety is down to us and the wider community of fab hence the verification method and due diligence. Seems to me looking for another thing to point the finger instead of taking her own accountability for the actions and lifestyle she did. | |||
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" women aren’t automatically believed as victims though. false reports account for less than 1% of all r*pe allegations, but 95% of r*pists are never convicted, most never even facing trial. thats partially because the way the law and the burden of evidence work in this country does not favour victims of sexual / domestic violence. its a systemic issue. but the data suggests that false allegations are exceedingly rare, while (at least) 1 in 3 women experience sexual assault at some point in their lives. i do agree that the taboo nature of swinging and alternative sexual lifestyles is a juicy topic and the media will sensationalise that aspect. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t believe victims when they come forward. So what about men who are victims of false allegations are they just to be thrown to the wolves.This is a report of a stranger ,Who we dont know and to me there's flaws in her own statements . She spoke about the men abusing her body on meets giving her sti's and also becoming pregnant but she consented with the men who was participating with and put herself in the situation of sex without protection as she was doing solo meets. The burden of blame lies at her feet for that . We are all responsible for our own sexual health and safety. What I took from the story was she entered into the swinging lifestyle the ins and out of her relationship only her and her ex know , but seems shes living with alot of regret for choices she made but instead of owning it the blames purely been shifted at the feet of her ex . As far as women aren't believed thats no true , I agree getting convictions is hard but shes got people from here who dont know her leaping to her defence seems like shes believed to me . We all join this site knowing what it is about so why is it down to the site to safeguard us . Its a way of swingers primarily to get intouch with each other and partake in it any way we want to but ,we are all adults and our safety is down to us and the wider community of fab hence the verification method and due diligence. Seems to me looking for another thing to point the finger instead of taking her own accountability for the actions and lifestyle she did. " being a “victim” of false allegations is not the same as being a victim of sexual/domestic violence. and look at the countless men who’ve had NUMEROUS allegations against them of heinous acts and continue to have successful careers - louis c.k, donald trump, chris brown, woody allen, to name just a few. even men who are guilty of committing these crimes don’t face any real consequences, so the idea that false allegations are ruining men’s lives is ridiculous when even TRUE allegations don’t ruin their lives. we are responsible for keeping ourselves safe sure, but we’re also responsible for each other. it’s not just down to the site, it’s down to the individuals who use it but the site does still have some responsibility to keep its users safe from harm, or at the very least take appropriate action when harm is reported. i don’t think anyone is saying that fabswingers is solely responsible for what happened to this woman, but they didn’t do enough to act on the reports that were made about her husband. of course she shouldn’t have been having unprotected sex with strangers, but ask yourself what kind of headspace you’d have to be in to take on that level of risk and to completely disregard your own health and safety like that. it’s clearly not the actions of someone who’s confident and secure in themselves, and given that she was clearly being abused and coerced by her husband, i think she deserves a little bit of grace. what about the men who slept with her unprotected and spread diseases - they seem to be getting off pretty scot-free in this discussion. | |||
" women aren’t automatically believed as victims though. false reports account for less than 1% of all r*pe allegations, but 95% of r*pists are never convicted, most never even facing trial. thats partially because the way the law and the burden of evidence work in this country does not favour victims of sexual / domestic violence. its a systemic issue. but the data suggests that false allegations are exceedingly rare, while (at least) 1 in 3 women experience sexual assault at some point in their lives. i do agree that the taboo nature of swinging and alternative sexual lifestyles is a juicy topic and the media will sensationalise that aspect. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t believe victims when they come forward. So what about men who are victims of false allegations are they just to be thrown to the wolves.This is a report of a stranger ,Who we dont know and to me there's flaws in her own statements . She spoke about the men abusing her body on meets giving her sti's and also becoming pregnant but she consented with the men who was participating with and put herself in the situation of sex without protection as she was doing solo meets. The burden of blame lies at her feet for that . We are all responsible for our own sexual health and safety. What I took from the story was she entered into the swinging lifestyle the ins and out of her relationship only her and her ex know , but seems shes living with alot of regret for choices she made but instead of owning it the blames purely been shifted at the feet of her ex . As far as women aren't believed thats no true , I agree getting convictions is hard but shes got people from here who dont know her leaping to her defence seems like shes believed to me . We all join this site knowing what it is about so why is it down to the site to safeguard us . Its a way of swingers primarily to get intouch with each other and partake in it any way we want to but ,we are all adults and our safety is down to us and the wider community of fab hence the verification method and due diligence. Seems to me looking for another thing to point the finger instead of taking her own accountability for the actions and lifestyle she did. being a “victim” of false allegations is not the same as being a victim of sexual/domestic violence. and look at the countless men who’ve had NUMEROUS allegations against them of heinous acts and continue to have successful careers - louis c.k, donald trump, chris brown, woody allen, to name just a few. even men who are guilty of committing these crimes don’t face any real consequences, so the idea that false allegations are ruining men’s lives is ridiculous when even TRUE allegations don’t ruin their lives. we are responsible for keeping ourselves safe sure, but we’re also responsible for each other. it’s not just down to the site, it’s down to the individuals who use it but the site does still have some responsibility to keep its users safe from harm, or at the very least take appropriate action when harm is reported. i don’t think anyone is saying that fabswingers is solely responsible for what happened to this woman, but they didn’t do enough to act on the reports that were made about her husband. of course she shouldn’t have been having unprotected sex with strangers, but ask yourself what kind of headspace you’d have to be in to take on that level of risk and to completely disregard your own health and safety like that. it’s clearly not the actions of someone who’s confident and secure in themselves, and given that she was clearly being abused and coerced by her husband, i think she deserves a little bit of grace. what about the men who slept with her unprotected and spread diseases - they seem to be getting off pretty scot-free in this discussion. " What about men who suffer with serious mental health problems due to false allegations , unless you know someone it has happened to then or experienced it yourself ( you being a woman i doubt that) you can't really comment on what its like for a man . I honestly dont get why thats an alien concept to grasp, they have to go through with that stigma hanging over their heads their whole life because unfortunately their lives and experiences isn't as important to some , there is no comparison right is right and wrong is wrong and its as damaging and as dangerous for men as it is for women , why is it that woman deserve more sympathy and compassion than men .. and hypothetically what happen if what shes said isn't really the truth , people from this guys real life know who he is and by process of elimination will have been outted for no reason . I honestly believe thats as dangerous . Look your never going to change my mind nor me yours so probably best we leave it at that . As far as the site goes and taking responsibility for its users once again we are adults and if there's a problem report it . When the police contact them then they have a duty to co operate .. its harmful if its a case of choosing who to believe and who to punish when its hearsay . The problem is not alot of people choose to report via the authorities due to fear of it hindering them . | |||
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"It's pretty much the reason I left for most of this year. Nothing was done when reported, so I just left the area instead." 🫂💋💘 | |||
"This does not surprise me at all sadly. This is why I have yet to engage with a couple. The feeling has always been very much the male driving the meet. And when called out they become arrogant and aggressive. Big fat red flag right there !!" Don’t blame you at all. I feel quite confident in spotting those accounts now, but some still slip through sadly. Don’t give up hope though, some of us women are real and looking for the fem to join for all the right reasons. | |||
"Having seen this thread, read the report, and podcast... I'm no longer content being associated with this website. Your seeing 1 situation. 1 report. One side of it also. More importantly, 1 situation where even she said she was acting enthusiastic to meet. I hardly find that to be a true reflection of this site, or what most of us want from here. You get bad people in every walk of life sadly. " Yes absolutely!! | |||
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"Its on now expect lots of new people here tomorrow " You called it! Lots of new profiles with pictures too good to be true. | |||
