FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > The lack of swingers
The lack of swingers
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find "
Not put off in the slightest here... and odd that on a swinging site people are put off by other members swinging! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Are you wanting a relationship tho and keep on swinging alone?
Or are they wanting a shag but to be exclusive?
Must admit only 1 to me have I came across a guy that was quite judgemental of me being on here but that was because I called him out on the fact he said if he was married he wouldn't let "his" wife meet anyone else. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are you wanting a relationship tho and keep on swinging alone?
Or are they wanting a shag but to be exclusive?
Must admit only 1 to me have I came across a guy that was quite judgemental of me being on here but that was because I called him out on the fact he said if he was married he wouldn't let "his" wife meet anyone else."
No its men only wanting 121 fun n as conversation carrys on to me going to cjs or they see iv veris they then grt judgy |
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By *anditMan
over a year ago
irvine |
Personally if i meet someone id be looking to swing with them after all it is a swinging site but the feedback i recieve back from people i chat to seems to be the majority of single males on here want to have a ride and ealk away or have nsa but exclusively. Again only my view and each to their own but if thats what you want why be on a seing site clues in the name |
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"Are you wanting a relationship tho and keep on swinging alone?
Or are they wanting a shag but to be exclusive?
Must admit only 1 to me have I came across a guy that was quite judgemental of me being on here but that was because I called him out on the fact he said if he was married he wouldn't let "his" wife meet anyone else.
No its men only wanting 121 fun n as conversation carrys on to me going to cjs or they see iv veris they then grt judgy "
your view of swinging is very diffrent to others view of swinging |
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By *aughty bbMan
over a year ago
here there everywhere |
"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find "
I agree with you on this
Ive met some great people over the year including blokes women and couples to either just socialise with or to play with
On other sites it rarely happened as they were pay sites but occasionally it cropped up where people came on more for a relationship rather than to swing with different people
On here I see it more and more where people are looking for more 1 to 1 on a regular basis and get annoyed when the mention of playing with orhers
I can remember on SH chatrooms the topic would crop up and the debate could get quite heated “Is two single people meeting and playing alone actually swinging “ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get that many men still think that they can shag indiscriminately and yet wouldn't want to date a woman who had done the same.
I don't care what people think about me. The only person who's opinion matters is me.
Fuck em or not as the case may be! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find
I agree with you on this
Ive met some great people over the year including blokes women and couples to either just socialise with or to play with
On other sites it rarely happened as they were pay sites but occasionally it cropped up where people came on more for a relationship rather than to swing with different people
On here I see it more and more where people are looking for more 1 to 1 on a regular basis and get annoyed when the mention of playing with orhers
I can remember on SH chatrooms the topic would crop up and the debate could get quite heated “Is two single people meeting and playing alone actually swinging “"
If you're not one of the two single people, what does it actually matter?
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By *aughty bbMan
over a year ago
here there everywhere |
"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find
I agree with you on this
Ive met some great people over the year including blokes women and couples to either just socialise with or to play with
On other sites it rarely happened as they were pay sites but occasionally it cropped up where people came on more for a relationship rather than to swing with different people
On here I see it more and more where people are looking for more 1 to 1 on a regular basis and get annoyed when the mention of playing with orhers
I can remember on SH chatrooms the topic would crop up and the debate could get quite heated “Is two single people meeting and playing alone actually swinging “
If you're not one of the two single people, what does it actually matter?
"
exactly
But it used to get heated and wuite funny watching people argue that it was or wasnt |
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"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find "
I can relate to this.x |
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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
I see what you mean MissCherry.
There are lots of people who believe if they meet someone then that person should only meet them from now on. But that’s not swinging to me.
To me, everyone can do whatever they want. As long as they are happy why should it worry me?
It’s when guys start getting judgy because a woman has met lots of guys. It’s double standards I’m afraid.
Even if I met Miss Perfect on fab, if she wanted to continue swinging, I wouldn’t stop her as long as she was happy and safe.
Just ignore the assholes, you’re better off without them  |
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"On "fabswingers" when it comes to single men most men i chat to on fab are put off by the fact im a swinger, even though thev messaged me on a swinging site, so surely it shouldn't come as that big a surprise? Im more having a rant it seems finding the elusive happy to swing male is indeed hard to find "
Single men who actually 'get' what swinging is about are the true unicorns on here. It's no longer a swinging site should be renamed fabhookups instead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i know most single guys aren’t clued up on the swinging scene and looking for a hookup. I’m here for the social aspect of swinging firstly and make friends that have the same mindset as me but if a meet turned into a more serious relationship I’m still happy to continue as a couple. I’m also well aware that I could go without meeting anyone at all and I accept that too. |
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Think this thread kinda answers itself and shows the uphill struggle many single guys face.
First, I agree with the sentiments that may have driven the OP.
However, is that not what initial chats are supposed to address? You ask relevant questions and find out what the person is about and thinks and believes and expects. There have been a hell of a lot of suppositions in this thread of what a guy will be like (albeit probably gained through experiences) and what they think. I have watched a change in Fab over the years as more and more "chancers" (both male and female) try to obtain a quick shag and the swinging ethos has become secondary at times. But that was almost inevitable, I guess.
I try to stick with the swinging lifestyle but often feel I am met with responses from women who have prejudice against the pariah that is the single male's role on here. There is little time or effort taken to try and find out if you are different or how you think, despite putting lots of info in your initial message. (An aside: Women often complain guys give little info, but more and more get told sending "extensive" or "long" message. This after being accused of sending too little info! You only seem to get one chance too, these days. No convo entertained.)
In sticking with the swinging ethos, I have never been refered to as a unicorn. Probably more of a narwhal these days!! Keep swinging! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I've been a fairly consistent swinger a while now....not really as active than in the 'olden' days lol
I guess I'm not exactly as impulsive either
this years been particularly terrible for a variety of reasons
though I'd have to say I'm not in the 100% must attend clubs/socials to meet or have sex with people as some appear to now use as a base of being a 'swinger' - some people attend the places and essentially do fuck all thats connected with the sexual aspect of swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What are these " casual hookups" and where can I get some?
Swinging to me has changed now as when we 1st joined we only met as a cpl...as the yrs go by it's harder to find cpls we both like and are both free to play with hence now we meet alone it's easier
.well it should be but it's totally not!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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finding the right person that fits into what you want and desire and available when you are in regards to swinging is actually very hard, some strike it lucky, some don't.
Some people want exclusivity, some don't want to get too close. being honest and open with each other is a start and that can only be with chatting.
The site has changed, not too many into swinging, just quite a lot trying to fuck straight away but if your state your intentions on your profile and ask the right questions hopefully you find out the ones who interest you for what your looking for and don't bother with the rest   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"finding the right person that fits into what you want and desire and available when you are in regards to swinging is actually very hard, some strike it lucky, some don't.
Some people want exclusivity, some don't want to get too close. being honest and open with each other is a start and that can only be with chatting.
The site has changed, not too many into swinging, just quite a lot trying to fuck straight away but if your state your intentions on your profile and ask the right questions hopefully you find out the ones who interest you for what your looking for and don't bother with the rest "
And don't forget the ones who aren't into swinging but also take their time to find someone to fuck and ask the right questions.
Let's be all inclusive now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You’re obviously too choose has there’s plenty of men on jer who are actually swingers and keen to meet people!"
Suppose nutting wrong with being choosey but there can be any reason why it wont work out with those who want the same thing.
Perseverance works, sometimes  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Best lady I ever met was a real swinger...blew my mind sexually and mentally.
Did she have the certificate of authenticity "
Lol...she was the real deal..?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In the main I find it's full of creepy single guys who think it's ok to pester to try and get the female half of a couple to meet alone with or without the males consent.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In the main I find it's full of creepy single guys who think it's ok to pester to try and get the female half of a couple to meet alone with or without the males consent.
"
Not all single guys are like that but I will say I think its a great thing these sad single guys show their true colours. If they are creepy or try and get the Mrs by herself then your getting the heads up of the type of person they really are so should be a straight block. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Not all single guys are like that but I will say I think its a great thing these sad single guys show their true colours. If they are creepy or try and get the Mrs by herself then your getting the heads up of the type of person they really are so should be a straight block. "
Agreed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing. "
That's just nonsense |
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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense "
Why is it nonsense? Lots of people block all single men because they’re fed up with the assholes and idiots. Therefore, the genuine ones get tarred with the same brush as there is no way of blocking just the idiot single guys |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
Why is it nonsense? Lots of people block all single men because they’re fed up with the assholes and idiots. Therefore, the genuine ones get tarred with the same brush as there is no way of blocking just the idiot single guys "
And lots don't
It's generally only guys who aren't getting their dick wet that complain about getting lumped in with the idiots |
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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
Why is it nonsense? Lots of people block all single men because they’re fed up with the assholes and idiots. Therefore, the genuine ones get tarred with the same brush as there is no way of blocking just the idiot single guys
And lots don't
It's generally only guys who aren't getting their dick wet that complain about getting lumped in with the idiots"
But my point still s_ands |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
Why is it nonsense? Lots of people block all single men because they’re fed up with the assholes and idiots. Therefore, the genuine ones get tarred with the same brush as there is no way of blocking just the idiot single guys
And lots don't
It's generally only guys who aren't getting their dick wet that complain about getting lumped in with the idiots
But my point still s_ands "
And therefore so does mine |
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By *andsCouple
over a year ago
Edin |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense "
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested. |
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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested. "
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested. "
Yeah if you're an unsuccessful single guy on here, it's because you're a tit, I'm happy with the small amount of swinging I get to experience on here, probably get to experience a lot more if it wasn't for, the tits  but still happy |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested. "
You do get jaded with fab. I don’t really meet folk of here but I stick about for some general chat. The no responses to mails and blocking single guys when they’re looking for single guys. Plus regular dating sites get me enough action lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested.
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men "
Do your pedals go forwards too  |
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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago
Falkirk |
"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested.
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men
Do your pedals go forwards too "
Please stop trying to bait people. I made a genuine comment with a genuine and valid point. If you don’t like it because it was me that said it, ignore it please. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested.
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men
Do your pedals go forwards too
Please stop trying to bait people. I made a genuine comment with a genuine and valid point. If you don’t like it because it was me that said it, ignore it please. "
Can you see how that could have been my first comment to you?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested.
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men
Do your pedals go forwards too
Please stop trying to bait people. I made a genuine comment with a genuine and valid point. If you don’t like it because it was me that said it, ignore it please. "
The best thing to do in regards to people on the forum who don't give a shit and try to stir up hassle in a post is just bypass their comment, even if they direct it to you personally.
Back to the thread:
Yes I am a single guy and yes I enjoy the site in the swinging capacity but there are too many who are not interested in swinging, there's even many who don't want to socialise.
If a couple want to block single guys, let them do so, they have their reasons so they can pick the guys they think is right for them.
Over the years I've been contacted by quite a few couples that are not looking fir single guys but I've interested them. I will say, doesn't mean I will jump, I'll just chat for a while to make sure that there's a good chance we are all the right fit.
If someone wants to meet me in a swinging experience then it may happen if someone be doesn't then there is a good chance that it won't happen but no matter our life's will still go on as normal.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Totally agree with you! The genuine guys end up tarred with the same brush down to the mindless lot that are only looking for one thing.
That's just nonsense
I agree with this, single guys that aren’t having any luck can’t say oh it’s down to the idiots and we get tarred with the same brush! Hundreds of blokes do well on this site, there are clearly other reasons people aren’t interested.
Oh, don’t get me wrong. I do ok. But sometimes it’s a shame that people get so fed up they feel they have to block all single men
Do your pedals go forwards too
Please stop trying to bait people. I made a genuine comment with a genuine and valid point. If you don’t like it because it was me that said it, ignore it please.
The best thing to do in regards to people on the forum who don't give a shit and try to stir up hassle in a post is just bypass their comment, even if they direct it to you personally.
Back to the thread:
Yes I am a single guy and yes I enjoy the site in the swinging capacity but there are too many who are not interested in swinging, there's even many who don't want to socialise.
If a couple want to block single guys, let them do so, they have their reasons so they can pick the guys they think is right for them.
Over the years I've been contacted by quite a few couples that are not looking fir single guys but I've interested them. I will say, doesn't mean I will jump, I'll just chat for a while to make sure that there's a good chance we are all the right fit.
If someone wants to meet me in a swinging experience then it may happen if someone be doesn't then there is a good chance that it won't happen but no matter our life's will still go on as normal.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Is there a difference between having sex with a swinger and a non-swinger? Are their boobs or cock bigger? Is their vaj tighter? Do they taste better?
It's just sex. |
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"Are you wanting a relationship tho and keep on swinging alone?
Or are they wanting a shag but to be exclusive?
Must admit only 1 to me have I came across a guy that was quite judgemental of me being on here but that was because I called him out on the fact he said if he was married he wouldn't let "his" wife meet anyone else.
No its men only wanting 121 fun n as conversation carrys on to me going to cjs or they see iv veris they then grt judgy "
Well that says more about them
They sound like they haven’t even read your profile or veris before messaging you
I know a good few really nice guys that know what this site is all about so they are out there x |
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"I think I've been a fairly consistent swinger a while now....not really as active than in the 'olden' days lol
I guess I'm not exactly as impulsive either
this years been particularly terrible for a variety of reasons
though I'd have to say I'm not in the 100% must attend clubs/socials to meet or have sex with people as some appear to now use as a base of being a 'swinger' - some people attend the places and essentially do fuck all thats connected with the sexual aspect of swinging. "
I was glad to read this response as the social aspect of swinging sends shivers down me
I don’t mean meeting for a social with a single man woman or couple but the whole social evening set up purely to chat
I can socialise with my friends
I am on here to play
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think I've been a fairly consistent swinger a while now....not really as active than in the 'olden' days lol
I guess I'm not exactly as impulsive either
this years been particularly terrible for a variety of reasons
though I'd have to say I'm not in the 100% must attend clubs/socials to meet or have sex with people as some appear to now use as a base of being a 'swinger' - some people attend the places and essentially do fuck all thats connected with the sexual aspect of swinging.
I was glad to read this response as the social aspect of swinging sends shivers down me
I don’t mean meeting for a social with a single man woman or couple but the whole social evening set up purely to chat
I can socialise with my friends
I am on here to play
"
I don't see a problem with what you just said. You are honest and open about that, which is great. Me I enjoy the social side when I can fit in with the times of social events. I'm quite happy to go to a social that is a social only.
Infact, every big social I have ever went to everyone knew beforehand that I wont be playing. Except this coming Xmas one as Ill be looking for 3 fff's to arrange an apartment through the morning so we can go back to after the social and see whose the last one standing  |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
"I think I've been a fairly consistent swinger a while now....not really as active than in the 'olden' days lol
I guess I'm not exactly as impulsive either
this years been particularly terrible for a variety of reasons
though I'd have to say I'm not in the 100% must attend clubs/socials to meet or have sex with people as some appear to now use as a base of being a 'swinger' - some people attend the places and essentially do fuck all thats connected with the sexual aspect of swinging.
I was glad to read this response as the social aspect of swinging sends shivers down me
I don’t mean meeting for a social with a single man woman or couple but the whole social evening set up purely to chat
I can socialise with my friends
I am on here to play
I don't see a problem with what you just said. You are honest and open about that, which is great. Me I enjoy the social side when I can fit in with the times of social events. I'm quite happy to go to a social that is a social only.
Infact, every big social I have ever went to everyone knew beforehand that I wont be playing. Except this coming Xmas one as Ill be looking for 3 fff's to arrange an apartment through the morning so we can go back to after the social and see whose the last one standing "
Better having sex than just standing?
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