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PTSD....

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By *yr_Odinson OP   Man  over a year ago

Hanley

I wrote this at the darkest time.. I;ve found it resonates with some.. and they relate.

This is my own work, its been published and is registered as my interlectual property.

The Monster from the ID

I yell into the night..

towards the void with all of my might..

trying to find the key, to unlock...

the doors of the prison,

that hold all the socks..

The monster within,

yearns to be free,

The power I have is dwindling to nil,

It seems to escape me,

rampage it seeks,

hurt and desire, its triumph delights

as it stalks its prey in the night.

The way is so dark,

I see no escape,

the light has gone out,

never to wake..

Where am I going, which way do I turn,

all for naught as the monster returns.

It smashes my head, breaks all my bones,

Only to laugh as I lie and moan.

My bodies desire is to sleep as I tire

Yet my mind it still leaps in its search for desire

I banish the thoughts, that stop me from sleeping,

only to find them back in my head they are creeping..

I turn over and lie, in a position more comfy,

sleep still eludes me no matter the peace

My mind still returns to the face I adore

The eyes ever searching,

for something I'm not,

That hard cased monster, you think you forgot.

He lurks still behind my eyes as I speak,

his influence grows, each day I grow weak.

How soon he breaks free, I just dont know..

How long can I hang on, to his chains in this place

My strengths almost gone,

he quickens his pace.

God help the fellow, who catches his wrath.

I defo wouldnt want to be in his path.

He growls and he screams,

he punches and ch0kes,

the angrier he seems, to many a bloke

He rips and he shreds,

whomever he sees

Like a titan from old, he screams his defiance,

Zeus and Apollo are impotent at his violence.

The words on the page,

help settle and cage,

The beast it rises,

when some here do say,

"you cant do that here"

"not here, that way"

"goodbye, you are nutz" they shout and they spray

They go and they take their hatred away,

"Fuck them, I dont need them" I say

But it hurts all the same,

when friends go their way,

saying I'm crazy..

What do they want, for me just to lie,

say I'm ok, and pretend not to die?

This outlet I have, for me to control..

out pour my thoughts, my feelings, my souls.

The monster within,

is beaten back still,

when I scream and shout on with words on a page

his anger and rage

at things he cant read,

his understanding is limited

to mindless violence and greed....

He stalks thru my head looking for cracks..

his hand reaches out,

never to touch,

but too punch

and to grab,

his anger defines,

his life up to date,

in his small confines..

He wants more, more than I give..

Takes what he wants,

and leaves me a husk..

This monster inside.... this ID from the ego

I try to surpress,

You all think I'm niceness and cuddly,

but dont mess..

I'll rip your head off and shit down the hole..

just beware the buttons you press..

This warning I give, the time is not right..

The monster is waiting,

lurking to fight..

beware, those that want to be friends

it will rip and kick, and tear out your souls..

its taken mine, and torn it to shreds,

The strength it posses beats mine no contest,

I'm tired and i'm wearied at fighting so long,

"No more please, you win, just leave"

I cry and I cry, tears of pain,

but no one ever sees, so I cry in vane

My heart is too big,

it worries for others,

ignore its own pain,

it might go away,

Never will, never does,

I'm always the same..

hurt and alone, in a corner I stay..

Til the monster calls me to play....................

This is my own work, its been published and is registered as my interlectual property.

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By *ary1001xMan  over a year ago

Hillsborough

as a fellow sufferer

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By *ndyandMandyCouple  over a year ago

swansea

Know this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/11/22 14:28:03]

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