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True Story - My Young Colleague

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Have you ever felt that silent, electric crackle connect you to another person? Someone with whom you've never even spoken to?

A shared knowledge between two people that isn't yet known. An intimate agreement that hasn't been made but is binding.

Where this story begins I don't know, but I think truthfully it must have been on a large 50+ person Teams call. Perhaps we are already denied the status of erotic story?

My first real memory is of her framed face, small in the bottom corner of my screen as I sit at home at the last moments of lockdown, on yet another tired, counterproductive, wellbeing get together. My role as a senior manager being to make people energised and happy about feeling completely drained and disconnected. But I can be funny, offbeat even, and my refusal to follow set patterns was enjoyed by some I thought.

Long dark hair, curled bangs framing her fresh looking face. Glasses, slightly serious in style, almost hiding feline, rather Asiatic eyes. But it was her lips I noticed. Uncolored, but dramatic in shape and fullness. A bottom lip that was oversized, engorged like an over-ripe berry. Yes, those lips.

I noticed other things.

Her composure and seemingly studied professionalism. When she spoke an even voice, efficient, no frills came fourth. Her voice seemed to conceal an accent, was it Glaswegian?

Her twitching quick smile when amused - which was equally quickly controlled and put away.

Who was she? I needed to know.

O was her name. I had that much.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I was quick to learn her name and that she had joined a team who were part based in my still hardly used office in the city. My pulse quickened no doubt at the vague sense that, one day, I might meet her in person. These are vague memories, half recalled but present. That early sense of possibility, just identifiable and no more. Traces.

I was not disappointed with my new knowledge but I wasn't yet consumed. Yet.

The next moment I recall was several months later and indeed in the now just coming back to life office, still deathly quiet for the most part and my team the only regular occupants.

She sat tucked in the corner, focussed on her screen. I was standing talking to a wider group of the team to which she belonged, drawing attention to myself through some elaborate story or similar and eyes were turned to me, smiling faces, eyes on me.

Not her though. I felt her resisting. Maybe even annoyed. As I talked I could feel my eyes falling on her, looking over the more willing participants in my story telling. Why wasn't she looking round? I felt irritated even, was she looking down on me, silently, but there? A clownish narcissism she'd become tired of in men maybe?

She didn't look round once.

I was provoked.

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By *ormladMan over a year ago

Glasgow/ Kilmarnock

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By *nexpectedExplorerMan over a year ago

manchester

Enjoying so far!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I saw that she was slim, had extremely thick lustrous hair and that her bottom lip was achingly real.

She seemed slight of build, but difficult to tell, though I think I understood her breasts to be smaller not larger. She had a large gleaming diamond on her finger. I wasn't disappointed, I'm married myself, it was merely... information.

I walked past, no doubt deliberately, as they were leaving, and I have in my memory a crisp image from this moment. She stood and was putting on a large, sensible dark jacket to go with her sensible glasses, when I saw on the white of the wall behind her, reveal in reverse silhouette, a tiny white triangle, where the tops of her thighs curved back towards her body allowing light to pass through.

I was transfixed. I remember distinctly thinking 'she must do yoga' and then 'what sort of man could get a woman like her?'

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By *untooMan over a year ago

manchester

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I had to keep these three images, carefully nurture and assisted in my mind, with me for several more months as there was no contact of any sort.

I felt something between us though. From nothing, I felt it.

Wishful thinking maybe but it was there. The next meeting gives us more to talk about.

It was the evening of our annual conference and in the city centre pub we had booked for afters. Her back to me, across the room sitting with members of my team. She wore a light, slightly shimmering sleeveless top, her beautiful hair falling over her back. Her waist drawn dramatically slim from those slightly broader shoulders.

My eyes on that back as I talked to a series of colleagues seeking, hopelessly though they didn't realise, some of my attention and approval.

Later, much later, drink had been taken by all, the group falls from thirty, fifteen,ten, now six and, yes, she's still there. Closer now, at my table, on the edge, but there. The youngest, the newest, quiet, but she's still there.

Her eyes almost never on me. I noticed that.

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By *3victorMan over a year ago

Didsbury

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *J GeminiTV/TS over a year ago

Northumberland

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By *unandadventureMan over a year ago

Here, There, Everywhere

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

We had finally waited out the others, the last two left, using the (to my mind interesting) fact of our living relatively nearby in the south of the city as the reason.

A vague taxi based excuse for the oldest man and youngest woman to remain alone together in a cosy, dimly lit night spot late into the night.

What is striking is that we hadn't spoken directly to eachother before that moment. Ever.

And when we did it was revealed to me that she knew a lot about me and that she had some strong views on me. Particularly, negative views about my character, my leadership style and my chosen topics of conversation and humour.

She launched into a direct and chastening attack on my person. I listened, amused but feeling exposed and disarmed at the accuracy and insight in her remarks. I watched her mouth, I couldn't stop watching her mouth. I cast my eyes down to her bare arms lest I be trapped by that bottom lip, inviting me as it was to linger, to lust.

I bought a bottle of wine, romantic. We drank it as the vitriol continued towards me.

I pushed back, I pointed out her inexperience, her youth, her ignorance. She enjoyed the challenge, renewed her attacks, sharpened her claws. I parried and struck back, seeing her riled when her knowledge or expertise questioned.

We were enjoying ourselves.

From nothing.

But she had been watching, from afar. I filed that away.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

But the facts were these: I was at least fifteen years her senior, she was engaged to a rich young man, I was married and happy, we were colleagues, I was in a responsible position in the organisation and it was a school night.

Also facts: She had been watching me and and I her.

Our connection moved from distant, silent and notional to physically possible, emotionally real and implicitly erotic.

She let me look. I saw that. She didn't hide.

But it was a school night and it was 1am and I was 3 hours later than I said I would be.

I said we needed to get that taxi and she looked sad but agreed. We walked together in the cold, shoulders noticeable bumping in a couple of occasions.

"Just kiss her".

No. I couldn't.

"She'll let you".

No. Don't. You are d*unk and so is she. She is so young.

Silently, we took the journey to the south of the city, looking out opposite windows. Goodbye.

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By *inky grandadMan over a year ago

Spain

👍🔥🔥

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By *hrisukbishareCouple over a year ago

Edinburgh

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

If this were a film, a montage with suitably affecting music would be used to show the passing of time as she slowly came towards me. Circling as if caught willingly into a whirlpool with me at the centre.

She gradually came to the office more, booking desks closer and closer to mine until she settles on the one directly behind mine where she still sits today. Lunch taken with me, occasionally then everyday. Timings not matching then aligned. Conversation never offered but always accepted. Glasses suddenly worn less. Disparaging remarks about get fiancé now heard occasionally - he sounds somewhat, beta?

Several months pass. Nothing more but this slow silent aligning of our rhythms. The most noticeable effect for me is that every night before sleep I realise I'm fixated on her lips, imagining that first kiss, that impossible erotic luxury that is surely beyond reasonable reach. Every night I return to the image.

I realise after a chance review of a social media post that she bears a remarkable (really) resemblance to a young Sophia Loren. I tell her casually, secretly, at work. She didn't know who that was. Looks it up on her phone. Her cheeks redden, she is momentarily lost for words. She feels the compliment, composure and reserve lost. She makes a muddled reply but that erotic tension is revealed. She knows. I know.

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By *ic loves to lickMan over a year ago

Birmingham

i'm hooked

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By *ew man 1976Man over a year ago

Limavady

Fantastic story

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Shall I continue?

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By *akedMMan over a year ago

Witney

This is great

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By *ld perverted VoyeurMan over a year ago

winchester

👏👏

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

Great

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Lunch times become my moments to explore, to provoke.

I recall her saying to a colleague that she's happy in her relationship and I audibly reacted with a questioning groan. She flashes her eyes at me, angered but I sensed vulnerable .

I take the opportunity to tell, in detail, the story of Echo and Narcissus to the lunchtime company. She is sitting across from me and she understands the unsubtle allusions. I hold her gaze a couple of times, brazenly, and she turns away, caught. She looks at me with an almost reverant expression, visibly enjoying my company.

The Christmas party looms. We can both feel it in the air weeks away.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Her lips become, at this point, a kind of obsession.

I focus my erotic energy on them, they become mythic in power and form. Unknown to her, I bestow upon them silent compliments, pour my hopes and desire upon them.

Pour.

I imagine them closed, pursed, my tongue tracing them, wetting them, they are acting as proxy for her more intimate places.

I imagine my own lips pressed to them, slowly, wetly, that impossible fullness cushions me, invites me closer.

I see my thick creamy semen dripping viscously from them, her mouth slightly parted. The colourful contrast of her red lips and my spent desire poured upon her face.

Every night I think on these thoughts. Lying there, aroused, waiting for tomorrow and another glimpse.

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By *ongbowmanMan over a year ago

Grantham

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By *inky grandadMan over a year ago

Spain

👍🔥🔥

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By *iMassageAddictMan over a year ago

Northampton-East

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By *j47Man over a year ago

limerick

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The day of the Christmas party arrives and she's been in my head to the exclusion of everything else.

I prepare a provocation, I want her to know, but without telling her.

At the drinks in the office before our meal I give a short speech thanking everyone and introduce a couple of games. I also do something completely different - I read a short story I had found the night before, looking for a way to psychologically prepare the ground. I took a risk.

I read aloud, slowly and with feeling, to a silent, completely baffled office crowd “Housewife” by Amy Hempel—

"She would always sleep with her husband and with another man in the course of the same day, and then the rest of the day, for whatever was left to her of that day, she would exploit by incanting, “French film, French film.”

Everyone was completely thrown and a few nervous laughs and awkward smiles followed by my refusing to answer questions as to what it was about.

I looked at her and nothing. She only glanced at me, no smile.. Uncertain I thought? But she must have realised?

I thought I had completely lost my mind for a moment, driven insane with desire.

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By *abmale7979Man over a year ago

Treorchy

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

Certainly different

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By *cotty909Man over a year ago

tranent

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By *ornybarMan over a year ago

clonmel

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sometimes in life, it's the only way

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By *alldarkhandsomedaveMan over a year ago

Derby

I’m in…intrigued to say the least!

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By *ongbowmanMan over a year ago

Grantham

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

More to come...just basking in the sun just now...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The meal part of the party got off to the perfect and somewhat fortuitous start. We were seated on one of those anti social long tables and I had an awkward seat near the far end and as people arrived they chose the seats nearest so the last remaining seat was next to me.

O was last to arrive, having been, we discovered on her telling, detained at the door by the bouncers who weren't accepting her ID. On her surveying the scene and seeing the space next to me I noticed the urgency with which she stole towards me.

I could feel the energy between us already and I complimented her on her ordeal with the bouncers, being mistaken for 17 when you are 27 no mean feat I told her. She coldly rejected the public compliment and gave some feminism infused commentary on what that experience was really like.

She was wearing a white sleeveless top and I thought had no bra on. The faint outline of her nipples visible every so often as she moved. I love that and could barely stop myself from looking.

We were close, very close, arms touching as we ate and pretended to converse with the others looking towards us, innocent. I could barely look up at her face, afraid I'd give myself away immediately.

As these things tend to, we drank, we played the parts of gregarious colleagues and worked the room in our own ways as we shifted to a couple of bars before we finally settled, only ten or so of us now, in a tasteful, low lit, late night piano bar. By now everyone extremely merry, conversation close in your ear over the music, rounds of drinks nobody needed, animated, touching, a good night out.

We waited, and waited, till finally just a few left, we were seated next to eachother in the corner. At last, we bade farewell to our last colleagues, our taxi party excuse a little thin as the others lived nearby also - but we used it anyway. Subtlety not high on the agenda any more.

We looked at eachother. I admiringly, lustfully even. She standoffish, defensive, somewhat challenging. I tried to engage her and she was sharp tongued in reply. I didn't understand. I tried again, smiles, lightness. Nothing back.

Then she surprised me. She looked at me and said directly - "What do you want?"

I thought a moment, but I had understood her tone, she wasn't joking.

Braver than I expected - "You".

She looked back, not displeased, a faint smile across those impossible lips. A pause, and then - "We can't, and you know it. But I like the idea too".

Satisfied isn't the word. I think I mostly felt vindication, I wasn't insane after all, I did detect all those faint signs, the glances, the looks away, the tone, the defensive and combative conversations, the alignment, it was all real. It's good to know you have been carrying on an 18 month fantasy in your mind.

I protested a little, just a hug, just a kiss, to see, just once. You know the lines, the pleading tone, the coaxing, the plaintive smiles.

All to no avail.

"We have to go, I've ordered an Uber" she said coldly.

And she had.

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By *umpstyleMan over a year ago

North

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

18 months, two private conversations, an acknowledgement, some knowing glances and some silent taxi rides.

And yet, the intensity of the connection, the sheer undisguised beauty she possessed, the sense of depth she emanted and the everyday promise of 'something' left me feeling energised, excited, not disappointed or frustrated.

My late evenings remained the same, me pre sleep routine of desire focussed on her face, her lips. My arousal now permanently about her.

I wasn't without guilt or pause, and perhaps this holding pattern allowed that excitement without risk for both of us?

I didn't have her number, I wouldn't ask and she would offer. It was a silent agreement that had it's own perverse logic. But I wanted it, a new avenue, new connection, I wanted it.

So I got it.

I asked a colleague to give it me on pretence of some semi plausible office logistics question.

I messaged first on a Friday evening. Something light and innocent

She replied Monday morning without salutation. "I didn't agree to this" she seemed to say in her curt reply on whatever I asked her on the Friday.

That coldness that I couldn't resist.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By *J GeminiTV/TS over a year ago

Northumberland

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By *ohn 66Man over a year ago

South Birmingham

I'm really enjoying this

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By *hekaiserMan over a year ago

Glasgow

Interesting

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

She finally gave me something.

The Xmas holidays were days away and I think it dawned on her she wouldn't see me for two weeks and she didn't like it. So she was... nice to me.

She replied to messages, she was interested in the music I sent her (email for details...), she told me a little about her life and, I heard this loud and clear, her occasional unhappiness at home, the lack of attention and recognition she receives.

Her fiancé was from money, had money, earned lots of money and, although apparently kind and pleasant, just assumed himself to be more than her, she a mere commoner.

I connected with this immediately, possessing as I do, a tremendous and unmovable working class chip on my shoulder.

She suggested, to my astonishment, that we go for a drink after the last day on work on the Friday evening. Alone.

Electricity isn't the word.

It was agreed.

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By *eter4383Man over a year ago

Norfolk

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By *ustHornyOldMeMan over a year ago

Exeter

A great read by a true wordsmith! 👍

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

For those who know Glasgow, my choice of Waxy O'Conner's as the venue might seem strange. But I followed this logic: nobody I know had been in there in twenty years, students and tourists the main draw, layout full of nooks and crannies and my colleagues all too posh to even consider going in. It was perfect.

And I found just such a desired nook on the second floor and the lighting was low, lending the mood I wanted. Of the 4 tables in my nook the other three were taken and I knew not a soul.

I texted her to come.

She arrived about 15 minutes later and I was struck by how nervous I was, and clearly she.

I got up to greet her and she hurried me to the bar dismissively so as to avoid a hug or kiss on the cheek. An inauspicious start.

The conversation was at once awkward but equally direct. We didn't pass the time on chit chat or reviewing the latest must watch TV series. No, we talked about ourselves and she insisted, over and over, that this was ridiculous and impossible.

She said clearly - "I can't ever kiss you because uf I do there is no going back. So that's why it'll never happen"

I said something like - "I'm not forcing you. You are here because you want to be."

She squirmed a little. She looked defensive. She said again - "I will not kiss you tonight so don't try. I'm going out for a meal with him and his family later. It's ridiculous I'm here".

We went on in this vein.

I was disappointed but I think also relieved. The life changing decision was taken for me and I didn't have to feel any guilt.

She looked incredible. Radiant, unreal, feminine. Dressed simply in plain work clothes, only a little make up. Yet her thick dark curls, worn down for her occasion, slanted knowing eyes holding my gaze and drawing us together, and that mouth, oh that mouth. A literal forbidden fruit.

Tantalus himself would have known lesser torture than I in those moments.

For a third time I was denied and for a third time I travelled home feeling like a life that could be lived was passing me by.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By *otwifes tribMan over a year ago

cannock

Amazing story

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By *inky grandadMan over a year ago

Spain

👍🔥

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

👏👏

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By *cotty909Man over a year ago

tranent

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By *ohn_1983Man over a year ago

South of Norwich

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By *umpstyleMan over a year ago

North

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By *rSteel95Man over a year ago

N.Somerset

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Keep trying . She will eventually give in to her hidden desires

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By *abmale7979Man over a year ago

Treorchy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Incredibly well written story. So many affairs happen in such away. Looking forward to the next instalment

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By *allye77Man over a year ago

Leicestershire

Absolutely superb writing.

It's a familiar feeling subject, maybe too familiar... memories 😕😕

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By *ongbowmanMan over a year ago

Grantham

we all have one 'that got away'

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Two hours later in at home, I'm trying to make sense of it all.

She's now 3 miles away in the city centre having a meal with her fiancé and his family yet that electric crackle between us has me feeling like she's sitting next to me, I can hear her breathing, I can smell her.

I have a sort of epiphany: 'don't kiss me', 'don't touch me', 'I won't let you'. She's thinking about it all the time. She's imagined it all in detail, it's exactly what she wants. She's inviting me.

I picked up my phone and I took a risk. Following my instinct, very little plan, with a sudden precise sense of where things lay - "I'm thinking about you there. Can you tell me what you are wearing"

No reply.

30 minutes later, finally - "I'm sorry. It's a family rule of theirs, no phones out at the restaurant. I'm wearing a white dress, you've not seen it, it's close fitting, simple style."

Barely a pause -"Can you go to the toilet and squeeze, no, pinch your nipples firmly for me. Really feel it. Then return to your seat. Tell me about it later."

Sent.

Two blue ticks.

Seen.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I knew it was in the right zone, I was finally convinced. I was satisfied with myself, my intuition.

I believe firmly that people can be connected, silently, in ways that they simply can't explain themselves, and I further believed you could sense it, if you just opened up to it. I had always sought these connections and she was simply the perfect example, the strength of connection existing before we had ever met.

I waited for the reply.

But it didn't come. I knew she couldn't but my composure and powerful conviction began to erode with each passing minute of silence.

An hour later I now realised I'd made a huge mistake, caught up with desire, making leaps of imagination on my own, not together. I wanted to delete it, to take it back.

I re-read our conversations, I replayed our time alone in the bar. Yes, a warmth, yes, the ever present electricity, but all unsaid, except for her saying the word "kiss" nothing in the previous year and a half had gone directly towards the sexual. And yet I had taken us directly to darker, more secret, more intimate places without a thought.

I felt exposed, excruciatingly exposed.

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By *aythan68Man over a year ago

Near Birmingham

Love itv

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By *ustHornyOldMeMan over a year ago

Exeter

You are also a master of suspense sir! All willing you on for a fruitful and amazing outcome! 👍

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *ongbowmanMan over a year ago

Grantham

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By *lirts.R.usCouple over a year ago

lanarkshire

Great story she's going to come round to you in the end

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

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By *lugoneMan over a year ago

rathmicheal

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By *ubbersoulMan over a year ago

south

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By *j47Man over a year ago

limerick

Talking about a tease

I salute you sir

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By *otonfoxMan over a year ago

Southampton

I’d like to read more of this masterpiece

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By *tretchYouMan over a year ago

East of the Midlands

Without doubt.. the best written story I’ve read on here. Great job

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By *ensual4playMan over a year ago

glasgow

Yes, great story so far and so well written!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Great story and so arousing and keeps me on tender hooks

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By *addy9675Man over a year ago

cardiff / south wales

Really good story loving it

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By *otwifes tribMan over a year ago

cannock

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By *cotty909Man over a year ago

tranent

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By *itboyslim2Man over a year ago

stevenage

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By *rSteel95Man over a year ago

N.Somerset

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Very kind

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By *ritter1Man over a year ago

Dundee

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By *rancois DillingerMan over a year ago

cwmbran

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By *ikki SmithTV/TS over a year ago

London

Loving the story xx

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By *r Blue999Man over a year ago

caerphilly

👍👍👍👍

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By *istresskaty1981TV/TS over a year ago

brigg

Loving this so far

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Those silent connections are real.

Your intuition, if you've opened to it, truly, will be right.

And so it was.

It was late when it arrived. Her directness on these matters, that I was just learning, present.

She told me, what I later learned was half a story. - "I'm home. I did as you asked. I did it when you told me as I was in a toilet cubicle when you messaged. I took the straps of my dress from my shoulders and exposed myself. I did it hard. It hurt but I loved it. When I replaced my dress my nipples were showing so clearly I panicked. I was too embarrassed to leave the toilets. But they wouldn't soften so I had to go out. When I sat down I thought the whole restaurant was looking at me and I was sure I saw the waiter notice. J's mother asked if I was okay. It was excruciating. I loved it. Thank you."

It's difficult to put words to my reaction but I recall the physical sensation more. I was sitting up in bed reading when it arrived and I felt myself overwhelmed with pleasure, the flow of blood almost instant. Next I recall a sense of being on a high wire, I had stepped out onto it and now I had to keep going but I wasn't sure if my next step.

I remembered composing and editing various responses, trying to find the tone. I eventually stepped back from full dom mode and settled into something less staged and more like what I felt - "I'm glad. I loved you telling me that. I thought I had overstepped."

Quickly now - "You know you hadn't overstepped"

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By *ensualpleasures69Man over a year ago

leeds

Excellent!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *otonfoxMan over a year ago

Southampton

Wow!?

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By *1sexypairCouple over a year ago

Retford

Fantastic

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By *enuine photographerMan over a year ago

Swansea

Bravo

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By *espect11Man over a year ago

Scotland

Very well written

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By *ed_BlueCouple over a year ago

Loughborough

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By *_ianMan over a year ago

Washington

What a great story and brilliantly written.

Can't wait to see where it goes next!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Brilliant story

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By *portbilly1976Man over a year ago

manchester

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By *itboyslim2Man over a year ago

stevenage

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By *ellsuitedMan over a year ago

Elstree

Beautiful

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By *he-ProfessorMan over a year ago

cheltenham

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Lovely the long build up keeping me hard reading it. Looks like she's going to get fucked sooner or later.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I think people would like me to continue the story, so I will.

It's all true.

In the meantime, I have a couple of other story threads up from previous times that you can look at. Search in the forum search:

"My instructions"

"The chooser"

5 stories there for you all.

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By *untooMan over a year ago

manchester

Thanks for continuing. I love these stories

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By *unandadventureMan over a year ago

Here, There, Everywhere

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *ral4fun69Man over a year ago

Near Warrington

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By *JSWINGSTARMan over a year ago

carshalton

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

We were now disconnected. She was to spend the holidays largely with her in-laws and then with her family in her provincial home town. I was travelling to see my own family hundreds of miles away.

Despite this distance, we were now bound by an increasingly revealed erotic bond, a signal slowly steadying in the static.

We began an urgent conversation, ranging from topic to topic, that was direct, honest and almost thrilling just for the sense of discovery.

She gave so little away in that first 18 months that each new piece of information she gave me felt like a precious part of a puzzle I was assembling.

I was fascinated by her. Her seemingly impossible contrasts, her innocent and knowing selves coexisting, and most of all, her sexual nature that she seemed to guard most closely.

I learned that she was a precocious child, standing out academically but from a poor, broken family and that a teacher had been her mentor and eventually helped her attend a famous English university. She hated it, felt out of place and limped through averagely, feeling in the end that she had wasted her chance. But she has met her fiancé and they now lived the the perfect life. Money, beautiful house, holidays, part of his wider safe happy world. But she was being squashed, ignored, unattended, a lovely ornament to his story.

The told me they slept in separate bedrooms. That fact amazed me, caught my attention unlike anything else she said. I felt it an invitation, an encouragement, a pleading even. But, like the others, it was given up carefully and not without effort. She was fighting herself.

She didn't say but I had a strong sense that she had not had a physical sexual conversion for a long time. I asked, gently, apprehensively, had I pushed too far?

But no, she was direct as ever - "We haven't had sex in a long time, maybe three years".

In this telling I'm actually lost for words as to what that made me feel and think. I think, mostly, it aroused my paternalistic, caring self, I wanted to give her what I felt she desperately needed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

We shared a love of reading and I recall her sending me a photo of her current book. The day after she had followed my instructions to touch herself intimately, painfully and then return to her fiancé.

The photo shows the cover of the book and you can see her white bed spread in the background but her thumb is visible holding the book and then nail is painted red. Her hands are inferred to be slender and oh so feminine.

It feels a curated, perfectly provocative moment. I was certain she was deliberately showing me this part of herself, sensual, traditionally feminine, beautiful. It was just a nail but I felt she knew what it would do to me.

And it had.

I told her. She protested. This was how it went.

Sometimes I was near convinced that she didn't know herself.

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By *otonfoxMan over a year ago

Southampton

This journey is so beautiful

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By *ornybarMan over a year ago

clonmel

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By *ed_BlueCouple over a year ago

Loughborough

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By *ton_maleMan over a year ago

Shoreham

So good!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So well written

...almost intriguing

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I felt myself to be carefully opening the petals of a flower, seeking the centre, the hidden and full perfection. But I needed to avoid damaging any part, so my fingers worked slowly and delicately.

This sense of her sexual self having been repressed, forgotten and neglected now belonged together atop the hierarchy with her bottom lip in my swirling obsessions.

I asked about it in different ways and she let out a little more each time. I felt saddened to hear her say that she had keep a diary and had recently re-read passages where she saw her past self trying to convince itself that she was asexual, devoid of desire and that this is why she was happy and even superior to those base others who needed these distractions. She was saddened too she said. I said - "That's not you".

She didn't reply to that.

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By *untooMan over a year ago

manchester

This is such a great story

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *he-ProfessorMan over a year ago

cheltenham

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By *cotty909Man over a year ago

tranent

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By *rSteel95Man over a year ago

N.Somerset

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By *ilbert4450Man over a year ago

paisley

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By *ral4fun69Man over a year ago

Near Warrington

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By *lugoneMan over a year ago

rathmicheal

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By *itboyslim2Man over a year ago

stevenage

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"This is such a great story "

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"This journey is so beautiful "

Thank you

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By *ornybarMan over a year ago

clonmel

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By *ritter1Man over a year ago

Dundee

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By *otwifes tribMan over a year ago

cannock

Amazing story

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By *im66123Man over a year ago

newcastle

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By *lwaysup4it69Couple over a year ago

Kirkby in Ashfield

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By *atesey68Man over a year ago

audley

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Amazing story "

Thank you

Much more to come

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By *akedMMan over a year ago

Witney

This is so so good

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"This is so so good "

Really kind. More to come

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By *appytoadsCouple over a year ago

West Dublin

Well done sir

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By *lderWiserNowMan over a year ago

Kettrin

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Well done sir"

Thanks

More later or tomorrow maybe x

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By *undayfunWoman over a year ago

Peterborough

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By *J GeminiTV/TS over a year ago

Northumberland

Stunning story, unlike any I have read here before.

No need for sexual intimacy, the sexual tension is electric.

Love it!

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By *ohn_1983Man over a year ago

South of Norwich

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Stunning story, unlike any I have read here before.

No need for sexual intimacy, the sexual tension is electric.

Love it!

Xx"

Really kind x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

This period where we were parted was one where every message was felt to have the potential for new heights of excitement, and I'm certain the reader will know exactly what I describe.

The cycle of anticipation, hope, the uncertainty, the sense of a true shared space, a perfect intersubjectivity so rarely known.

Both of us, when able, replying in hurried fashion, eager to share more, to explore this undiscovered country that was our histories, our reasons for being in the conversation at all, (some of) our secrets, and (surprisingly little yet) of our desires.

Her directness over message not entirely different to her self in person, but maybe felt more keenly. Somehow still feeling a little bolder than the person I knew at work.

I enjoyed her strong positions on things, her assured and logical nature, her insightful comments on all manor of topics which belied her age.

Despite this boldness and strength of character, when it came to intimate matters, she was happy to answer but not lead. She needed that from me.

For my part, I was happy to lead but uncertain how to balance, so that high wire act continued with each message. I didn't try to take big steps, I proceeded with the caution the heights and the risks demanded.

I liked her. Really liked her. Her physical beauty, so delightfully guarded and almost intentionally understated, was being complimented by this whole person that I loved to hear from, who was wise beyond her years, who was refreshingly vulnerable but not weak, who provided insight into almost all things from perspectives I hadn't considered or perhaps couldn't articulate.

She liked me. This new me that told her about myself in the minute detail she seemed to crave. She told me too. I like her telling me. She flattered me in ways I was ready to hear.

Our physical parting seemed to precipitate this rush to know everything of the other.

So we shared.

We shared that we were going to be in Glasgow on a shared single day over the holidays. But it didn't work, we had commitments and logistical issues.

We agreed to meet.

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By *obBones63Man over a year ago

Darlington

WOW!!! 🍆 🍆 🍆

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By *untooMan over a year ago

manchester

So clever, always with that edge and sex was drawing closer but still just beyond reach

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By *lderWiserNowMan over a year ago

Kettrin

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By *peedy74Man over a year ago

Thame

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By *otonfoxMan over a year ago

Southampton

Can’t wait for the next episode

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By *lwaysup4it69Couple over a year ago

Kirkby in Ashfield

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *j and c 2Couple over a year ago

mullingar

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By *angtidy42Couple over a year ago

Redditch

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By *oxtrotOscar654Man over a year ago

Framlingham, Woodbridge Suffolk

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By *J GeminiTV/TS over a year ago

Northumberland

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