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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Hi, newbies to the world of fab.
Mrs has an interest in handcuffs, blindfolds and restraints.
Nothing heavy, just looking for advice and suggestions.
New to BDSM too."
The world of BDSM is vast with so many twists and turns.
Without knowing more about what it is that interests your partner then I can only offer some basic advice.
1. Safety, safety, safety.
2. With restraints always consider the body position, and try not to put too much force or stress on limbs and joints. Keep an eye on their circulation and watch for any numbness or pins and needles, ensure restraints are not too tight.
3. Restraint type - I would recommend some velcro style ones to begin with - perhaps under bed restraints - as they can be removed quickly and with little fuss. Don't go for full leather/metal locking restraints straight away. I also wouldn’t bother with handcuffs until you are a bit more comfortable with what you want to do.
4. Blindfold - look at a mindfold on amazon. Best blindfold I have picked up as its comfy and blocks out the light more than the thin fabric ones.
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"Hi, newbies to the world of fab.
Mrs has an interest in handcuffs, blindfolds and restraints.
Nothing heavy, just looking for advice and suggestions.
New to BDSM too.
The world of BDSM is vast with so many twists and turns.
Without knowing more about what it is that interests your partner then I can only offer some basic advice.
1. Safety, safety, safety.
2. With restraints always consider the body position, and try not to put too much force or stress on limbs and joints. Keep an eye on their circulation and watch for any numbness or pins and needles, ensure restraints are not too tight.
3. Restraint type - I would recommend some velcro style ones to begin with - perhaps under bed restraints - as they can be removed quickly and with little fuss. Don't go for full leather/metal locking restraints straight away. I also wouldn’t bother with handcuffs until you are a bit more comfortable with what you want to do.
4. Blindfold - look at a mindfold on amazon. Best blindfold I have picked up as its comfy and blocks out the light more than the thin fabric ones.
"
We noticed so many variables. Don't really know where to start except at home with what's in our pictures. Not much lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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May I suggest visiting one of the well known Fet markets, e,g London Alternative Market
Thee will lots of stands with helpful people and you can actually see and feel the items .
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"May I suggest visiting one of the well known Fet markets, e,g London Alternative Market
Thee will lots of stands with helpful people and you can actually see and feel the items .
"
LAM and it's northern varient LAMchester are fab.
When starting out I'd recommend read, read, read and read.
Sure reading and research seem boring but confidence, knowledge and understanding when playing is soooo sexy... Believe me.
I have a list of books a mile long but if you want helpful books to read that also give you ideas and suggestions for play then;
Safe, Sane, Consensual and Fun by John Warren
And
Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge
Are really good places to start, they help with a basic level of knowledge while helping you navigate your first steps safely. |
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"May I suggest visiting one of the well known Fet markets, e,g London Alternative Market
Thee will lots of stands with helpful people and you can actually see and feel the items .
"
good advice... Bit far will look if anything like that in the Northwest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Join a certain fetish lifestyle website and search for local Munch Meetings.
Get through your nerves and go to the meets. There are loads of kinksters there, who are more than willing to offer advice to newbies.
We attended our first Munch 15 yrs ago. It was the best thing we did. We are still great friends with people we met at that first meeting.
Just have fun, experiment and don't forget where the handcuff keys are!!  |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"I believe LAM now goes to Manchester, which may be worth them checking out when and if lockdown is loosened and we arrive at the new normal.
Suspect not this year, however, let’s hope."
Yep this year. Was on last month. Is on again on the 27th...
I was going to have a stall but the stock hasn't arrived yet. |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Join a certain fetish lifestyle website and search for local Munch Meetings.
Get through your nerves and go to the meets. There are loads of kinksters there, who are more than willing to offer advice to newbies.
We attended our first Munch 15 yrs ago. It was the best thing we did. We are still great friends with people we met at that first meeting.
Just have fun, experiment and don't forget where the handcuff keys are!! "
Which munch? It might have been mine! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Communication, boundaries and consent are the most important thing.
The books recommended above are good.
Just take it steady, and have fun. We have very fluid boundaries, so whilst it’s always with very clear boundaries and consent, we talk, and our play evolves all the times.
If anyone tells you that you don’t need safe words, run. |
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"Hi, newbies to the world of fab.
Mrs has an interest in handcuffs, blindfolds and restraints.
Nothing heavy, just looking for advice and suggestions.
New to BDSM too."
Bondage is fun and a nice place to start a BDSM journey.
Bondage tape or electrostatic tape (it’s the same but cheaper) is nice to try, also rope , metal chains off the roll at b&q - 7mm link is a good thickness, plus everyday items like leather belts and silk ties are fun and can be planned but feel more spontaneous. I try to avoid anything in the bdsm sections of ann summers or regular sex shops |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Join a certain fetish lifestyle website and search for local Munch Meetings.
Get through your nerves and go to the meets. There are loads of kinksters there, who are more than willing to offer advice to newbies.
We attended our first Munch 15 yrs ago. It was the best thing we did. We are still great friends with people we met at that first meeting.
Just have fun, experiment and don't forget where the handcuff keys are!!
Which munch? It might have been mine! "
Our first Munch was Manchester Munch at Via Bar in Canal Street. The nerves were twitching but we made it down into the depths and never looked back.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Suggest a number of starter things
As suggested go to a larger 'public' fetish market to get a feel of the atmosphere. BBB in Brum is due to start again soon.
Does your Mrs want to take charge or submit? Start with just an improvised blind fold, with just touching and the other being in charge totally of the play
Consider both going to see a professional Dominant for an hour or two of professional play in a dungeon, learn what you do and don't like in that time, then walk away and discuss it,then discuss some more, then leave it come back to it and discuss again, then try. Finding an excellent pro Dom will take research though. PM me for some more hints on this.
Most of all enjoy exploring together.
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Which munch? It might have been mine!
Our first Munch was Manchester Munch at Via Bar in Canal Street. The nerves were twitching but we made it down into the depths and never looked back. "
It was 
I love meeting people I helped corrupt hehehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you want to play together with a purpose whilst meeting others and getting a great feel for the BDSM scene and culture. Suggest go to a beginner rope play workshop, get to play non sexually as a couple with others around you doing much the same, observe learn and discuss with your partner what does and doesn't work for you both.
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