FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Not having much luck
Not having much luck
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
Hi op
No reply simply means not interested but they could be busy also.your bio could do with some work,so if you search within the forum Search profile help results from previous folk whom asked similar as yourself and use the tools load of helpful advice so you can create something that fits around you personally.  |
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By *ammo89Man
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
You're still pretty new man, so stick at it and find out what works for you  . Getting the first meet and verification is the hardest, but once you get a good veri, your reputation will improve and you'll see more success. Never be afraid to seek advice from the women on here too - they are always nice and eager to help |
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Your pics are not enticing. You cannot accomodate (presumes attached) and this will go against you. Your bio says nothing about you or what you are offering.
Profile screams you are here to get your dick wet. So not surprising you aren't getting much attention when plenty other male profiles to choose from |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
OP.
You have only been on here for a few weeks. This isn't an Instant Success site.
You've joined after a Covid pandemic. Prior to it starting 2 years ago, it could take guys over a year to get success.
Nowadays, it's even longer!
There are 100's of guys in your area all seeking the same goal. So YOU have to make your Profile stand out! Otherwise, the women can afford to be picky from the wide choice of Males.
You have to "sell yourself" just like a CV would for a job!
Your profile is only 3 lines! You have to say what you can bring to a meet, plus what you would expect at one too!
You don't accommodate but don't say why; that's a Red Flag to a lot of ladies or Couples.
Your pics? Come on, could you at least smile in one of them?
Any success is down to yoyr own effort. You'll need Patience and Perseverance in abundance, plus a thick skin to handle all the rejections or simply No Replies (which mean recipients aren't interested in you!).
It's tough out there for Single guys. Getting yourself noticed works, so get to Clubs or Socials in your region.
It can work. Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
Some of your photos look like you are trying to work out how to use your camera. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
Yeah, we are all miserable. How dare we not reply to every message in our inboxes from guys we aren’t interested in. It’s out of order if you ask me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!!
Yeah, we are all miserable. How dare we not reply to every message in our inboxes from guys we aren’t interested in. It’s out of order if you ask me. "
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
Calling women miserable on the forums won't help your cause either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!!
Calling women miserable on the forums won't help your cause either. "
Totally agree  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a numbers game OP. I'm currently accepting messages of men, hence I have 764 unread ones in my inbox at this moment. I do the odd scroll, I do chat to some, I'll bulk delete a lot!... I can give you my login if you fancy being my free PA for a week? But failing that I actually do have a job myself. So spending hours messaging back 'no ta' is not worth my time |
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By *exy johnMan
over a year ago
glenrothes fife |
Hi every one right the thing that most of us men don't think about is the other people most the women on here have life out side of the site its a getaway from real life for some not there hole life so if thay don't get back to you it could be for a lot of things it just may take some time even if you are luck to hear from them till you do be nice to ALL THE WOMEN on the site as thay have feelings to |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
No wonder your finding it difficult |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
Cracking way to get on lots of ladies block list!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many people here will look at a profile before reading the message attached.
Often they've already decided on whether or not their interested before opening the message.
Use your profile to sell yourself, express in your bio what you are seeking and what you can offer.
Currently your bio tells us nothing but you're looking for what the majority here are seeking.
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My advice is join a club or go to a social get your self out there
Expand on your bio ...look at mine for example and even then I'm still making changes to get the best out of it, with fab you need to put 100% effort in to get 10% back ...but be paitent and keep chipping away at the block
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You are completing with guys when for every woman there 100 blokes.
What probably doesn't help you is having just 2 lines on your profile and not being able to accommodate at your age, which usually indicates to most that you aren't single. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated |
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"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated "
It's better but the photos need to be re done. |
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"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated "
It's better....but Swinging isn't Cheating and with your mug shot on show hopefully she'll find out!
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"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated "
"Must be safe sex but would do bareback if the lady prefers" doesn't really make sense. |
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"So are you saying that there is no married people on here looking for a bit of NSA fun?? And if that's the case how do I get round it on my profile?"
Not saying there are none, but it does put a lot of folk off. If I was looking for a guy (I'm not), I would stop reading the minute I saw you were married. T |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So are you saying that there is no married people on here looking for a bit of NSA fun?? And if that's the case how do I get round it on my profile?"
Of course there are married people on the site, getting around it isn't an option is it, that is making it worse.
You are who you are and you're living your life the way you are, if someone from here wants to be part of it then it's up to them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
Wow! Or maybe they're just not interested in you?
The fact that you are calling women miserable just because you aren't getting the results you feel you deserve is very telling in itself |
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By *elkieWoman
over a year ago
Durham |
"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
We’re all busy fucking other people. HTH!!! |
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"So are you saying that there is no married people on here looking for a bit of NSA fun?? And if that's the case how do I get round it on my profile?"
I'm sure there are others, but the majority will want to avoid you and stick with the honest folk.
The only real way around it is by being honest with your partner....or by getting caught! |
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The women you are messaging, have you read their profiles and what they are looking for?
I wouldn’t reply as I don’t meet privately nor with people without their partners knowledge.
I think your expectations of the site and the people on here probably differ to others. |
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Hmmm. I've been here awhile. Just a single meet in nearly 2 years. I know covid was around. Getting lots of messages from nice people/couples and singles usually miles away. Where are people closer to me? Happy for any feedback on my profile. Not sure what I'm doing wrong. It's clear that I'm older Asian and not very tall! Maybe that's the reason.lol. Go on then forum? up for suggestions and I can take a bit of contructive (or otherwise) criticism |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ? "
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hmmm. I've been here awhile. Just a single meet in nearly 2 years. I know covid was around. Getting lots of messages from nice people/couples and singles usually miles away. Where are people closer to me? Happy for any feedback on my profile. Not sure what I'm doing wrong. It's clear that I'm older Asian and not very tall! Maybe that's the reason.lol. Go on then forum? up for suggestions and I can take a bit of contructive (or otherwise) criticism "
Not being funny but you should start your own topic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for "
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for "
You should them for some pointers.
You're best off keeping in mind that no one owes you anything. It's not a shop where you go and get something off the shelf |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life "
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start |
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"Hmmm. I've been here awhile. Just a single meet in nearly 2 years. I know covid was around. Getting lots of messages from nice people/couples and singles usually miles away. Where are people closer to me? Happy for any feedback on my profile. Not sure what I'm doing wrong. It's clear that I'm older Asian and not very tall! Maybe that's the reason.lol. Go on then forum? up for suggestions and I can take a bit of contructive (or otherwise) criticism "
Your profile says you are not meeting at present |
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"Not being funny but you should start your own topic "
May be but then there would be hundreds of forum posts pretty much all replicating the same thing.
Although this topic comes up very regularly; it could be a blog item. 'How to improve your profile and get guaranteed meets' |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start "
You could bring the wife along you never know she might enjoy it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So are you saying that there is no married people on here looking for a bit of NSA fun?? And if that's the case how do I get round it on my profile?
Not saying there are none, but it does put a lot of folk off. If I was looking for a guy (I'm not), I would stop reading the minute I saw you were married. T"
Me too but leave it on your profile OP as it will allow people to filter you accordingly and save you time messaging those who won’t meet married guys (behind their wife’s back) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start "
Socials ARE the place to start.
With so many blokes on here looking to get their dick wet, its almost impossible to stand out.
Chatting in a pub, face to face and proving youre a nice guy who actually looks like the photo makes it much easier to stand out.
Not to be funny, a social also tends to out those who cant put some time and effort into a relationship. Yes. Its a relationship even if only overnight. Cheat if you wish, nothing to do with us but be aware that very few people are willing to jump to attention when a guy says he only has an hour or two free, or can only do certain times because his mrs might find out.
One who can meet up in a pub and hold a conversation about life, politics, dogs vs cats or cheese and onion vs salt and vingear is much more likely to end up naked in a hotel room with a nipple in his mouth.
Im fairly sure that was how we all used to do it before the internet came along and turned the whole of society into a meat market.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start
Socials ARE the place to start.
With so many blokes on here looking to get their dick wet, its almost impossible to stand out.
Chatting in a pub, face to face and proving youre a nice guy who actually looks like the photo makes it much easier to stand out.
Not to be funny, a social also tends to out those who cant put some time and effort into a relationship. Yes. Its a relationship even if only overnight. Cheat if you wish, nothing to do with us but be aware that very few people are willing to jump to attention when a guy says he only has an hour or two free, or can only do certain times because his mrs might find out.
One who can meet up in a pub and hold a conversation about life, politics, dogs vs cats or cheese and onion vs salt and vingear is much more likely to end up naked in a hotel room with a nipple in his mouth.
Im fairly sure that was how we all used to do it before the internet came along and turned the whole of society into a meat market.
"
^^^ This, one hundred percent
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start
Socials ARE the place to start.
With so many blokes on here looking to get their dick wet, its almost impossible to stand out.
Chatting in a pub, face to face and proving youre a nice guy who actually looks like the photo makes it much easier to stand out.
Not to be funny, a social also tends to out those who cant put some time and effort into a relationship. Yes. Its a relationship even if only overnight. Cheat if you wish, nothing to do with us but be aware that very few people are willing to jump to attention when a guy says he only has an hour or two free, or can only do certain times because his mrs might find out.
One who can meet up in a pub and hold a conversation about life, politics, dogs vs cats or cheese and onion vs salt and vingear is much more likely to end up naked in a hotel room with a nipple in his mouth.
Im fairly sure that was how we all used to do it before the internet came along and turned the whole of society into a meat market.
^^^ This, one hundred percent
"
It’s difficult to meet in public when you’re cheating on your wife - people might see you. Socials have got to be relaxed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Told me if was looking for a bit of fun to try on here as they had done with success
Have you had a look at their profile ?
They not on any more said they got plenty of what they were looking for
You should go to any organised socials and get to know people, and they get to know you and your home life
Would be quite nervous on my own wouldn't know where to start
You could bring the wife along you never know she might enjoy it "
^^^ And also this... OP, you mention in your profile that the spark has gone out of your relationship? Maybe you should focus on that instead of sneaking about on a swingers networking site? You, surprise your partner with a candlelit dinner, bottle of wine. That sort of thing. And do the dishes after... |
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I had the same when I started a couple of years ago, don't worry about it, I come on the forum and put something Similar and was told just be honest and to be patient as a lot of people sign up wanting a quick turn around.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I had the same when I started a couple of years ago, don't worry about it, I come on the forum and put something Similar and was told just be honest and to be patient as a lot of people sign up wanting a quick turn around.
"
That's what I thought be honest, seen others put on their in a relationship, just have to be patient |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh no not another single guy profile bleating about his lack of success on here. Cold hard fact is that “single” guys are plentiful on here so you have to be exceptional or damn lucky to get a meet. Suck it up mate cos couples and single women are not attracted to whingers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well as someone put already ...Cheating isn't swinging ??? but saying that ?? seems a fair few of "Single" males aren't ??  "
I think you mean single people, even some couples aren't real couples just fb's. |
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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago
Fabville |
" Well as someone put already ...Cheating isn't swinging ??? but saying that ?? seems a fair few of "Single" males aren't ??
I think you mean single people, even some couples aren't real couples just fb's."
Really? How shocking..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Well as someone put already ...Cheating isn't swinging ??? but saying that ?? seems a fair few of "Single" males aren't ??
I think you mean single people, even some couples aren't real couples just fb's.
Really? How shocking.. "
Have a good day |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You're more likely to get a reply in the forums as you can probably see. Maybe that's the foot in the door but yeah, women here do get a lot of messages and replying to every single message would be tiresome. I've said in the past that Fab should introduce a feature that makes it easier to determine. If a message is opened, there should be perhaps two buttons beside the reply box. 1. Not interested. 2. Busy but will get back to you. This way we'd know for sure, I reckon. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
Whoa there!!
Calling out women as Miserable will do you NO favours at all!
Have you really looked at your profile?
Firstly, 3 pics of your Dick!
Really? Do you think that potential meet people will recognise you by your Cock? Ditch these 3 photos to Friends or Private and put up a Face and / or Torso pic!
Your profile is written as a list of Bullet Points. You need to move it into Paragraphs.
Also, research has shown that starting each point or sentence with "I" in any written description, puts people off reading it.
But read your first line again. The inclusion of "not meeting due to a health issue" is a perfect example of shooting yourself in the foot!
Just say you are looking to chat first and take it from there.
Look on the Firum Index for other threads all asking the same as you and heed the advice.
Look at the FAB advice page for Newcomers. It states quite clearly that a No Response or Reply, is indicative of the recipient ISN'T INTERESTED! It's clear to see!
Consider that women get swamped with messages, running into 100's. They don't have time or the inclination to wade through all these messages and reply to each one!
It doesn't work that way! The ladies can afford to be picky and choose to contact the guys who have put in the effort in both their profile and approach.
They also note those Males who come out with negative comments on FAB.
TRUST the advice given to varied similar threads on here.
Good Luck! |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
3 photos of your cock dont really entice.
Your bio is a contradiction to the top part.
While you have got t blurb it basically sums up to i dont care i just want sex.
As for what is wrong with the people you messaged, maybe you don't meet their requirements.
They are not obliged to reply.
Maybe they're just too busy being happy getting fun elsewhere
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Keep the face pictures and the part about being in a relationship but ditch the rest of the bio. No one is interested in the blurb.
Women like honesty and will trust you now you’ve mentioned your status.
You’ve pretty much nailed it mate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ll be straight with you mate, put the phone down and go outside and put that effort in to connecting with someone in real life. Fabs alright and that but can be a frustrating lonely place for a man. Don’t let it get you down. ( sorry if I come across patronising). |
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
In that third photo are you wanking?
I know it is a personal opinion but it isn't an attractive photo.
Oh, and as you will see not many people respect cheats. |
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
Welcome to the world of a solo guy profile in Fab mate. Do this, do that, cock pics, no cock pics, long message, short message, exciting profile, concise but precise profile, who knows mate? It is what it is 
God luck though, you are not alone |
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By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
Think seriously OP about trying to get your relationship partner involved . Plenty of advice on the forums about that. Failing that find the courage to go to a group social,usually in a pub ,in your area |
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You are not alone OP. I rarely meet someone from site. I visit clubs regularly and in general have good experiences. Having said that, clubs can also be as hard as here depending which one you choose to visit, your social skills and sex appeal.
My advice, if it is starting to get under your skin maybe is time to have a break. |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
You have 3 dick pics and you live with someone... You're profile is very basic. |
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By *ilfMan
over a year ago
GLOUCESTER |
"You're cheating on your partner... That'll be why."
Absolute pet hate.
If you don't love your partner enough to give the bare minimum respect to being faithful, split up so they can get someone better  |
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself.
Welcome to the world of a solo guy profile in Fab mate. Do this, do that, cock pics, no cock pics, long message, short message, exciting profile, concise but precise profile, who knows mate? It is what it is
God luck though, you are not alone "
We have read your profile.
Can you not accommodate at home?? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself.
Welcome to the world of a solo guy profile in Fab mate. Do this, do that, cock pics, no cock pics, long message, short message, exciting profile, concise but precise profile, who knows mate? It is what it is
God luck though, you are not alone
We have read your profile.
Can you not accommodate at home??"
No |
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself.
Welcome to the world of a solo guy profile in Fab mate. Do this, do that, cock pics, no cock pics, long message, short message, exciting profile, concise but precise profile, who knows mate? It is what it is
God luck though, you are not alone
We have read your profile.
Can you not accommodate at home??
No "
Partner? |
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"I had the same when I started a couple of years ago, don't worry about it, I come on the forum and put something Similar and was told just be honest and to be patient as a lot of people sign up wanting a quick turn around.
That's what I thought be honest, seen others put on their in a relationship, just have to be patient "
Even the socials turn on married men trust me I’ve been there |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself.
Welcome to the world of a solo guy profile in Fab mate. Do this, do that, cock pics, no cock pics, long message, short message, exciting profile, concise but precise profile, who knows mate? It is what it is
God luck though, you are not alone
We have read your profile.
Can you not accommodate at home??
No
Partner?"
Check my profile |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're cheating on your partner... That'll be why.
I guess I'm the only person on this site that cheating....mmmm"
So if everybody else on site jumped off a cliff would you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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there are plenty on here who meet married men or women but we all know thats not the real problem ...the real problem is per woman there are 100s of men the choice is plenty but even then you have to be desirable to someone for a meet to happen ... many men dont stand a chance just because of this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
You should do that if you're cheating on a woman. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong"
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong |
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong "
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way."
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh the irony of someone on here in a relationship but not involving their partner complaining about not enough interest. They just don't get it. "
Just because your on here as a couple it's easy for you to say that, if only every couple in the world was the same what a wonderful place it would be |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Oh the irony of someone on here in a relationship but not involving their partner complaining about not enough interest. They just don't get it.
Just because your on here as a couple it's easy for you to say that, if only every couple in the world was the same what a wonderful place it would be "
Ever thought about counselling salvage your relationship and get back that spark I despise cheating had it done.. but on a serious note will be others in similar circumstances you just need to find them pal |
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"Oh the irony of someone on here in a relationship but not involving their partner complaining about not enough interest. They just don't get it.
Just because your on here as a couple it's easy for you to say that, if only every couple in the world was the same what a wonderful place it would be "
We haven't been on the scene long. I spoke to Mrs about it last year. She agreed to go to our local club. It's quite small and maybe that helped. Anyway we had a bit of fun and still taking things slowly. The point is much better going on that journey with her than leaving her at home.
That doesn't detract from the point if everyone just plays away there just aren't enough women to go around (so to speak). But you get the idea. |
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way.
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth "
Yes there probably are and the real truth is?
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way.
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth
Yes there probably are and the real truth is?
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way.
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth
Yes there probably are and the real truth is?
"
Not everyone is honest, how many people 'cannot accommodate' would give the real reason they can't. Either in a relationship or live parents |
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way.
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth
Yes there probably are and the real truth is?
Not everyone is honest, how many people 'cannot accommodate' would give the real reason they can't. Either in a relationship or live parents "
Totally get that and I'm sure there plenty who aren't as open as you, but being a cheat doesn't make you a remotely honest person. See it this way, why would a stranger on here trust someone to have reapect for them when they clearly don't have any respect for their own partner? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong
Yeah, we'd say it is!
There are much better ways to re sparking a relationship. What you are doing is just the cowards way.
Must be 1000's of cowards on here, they just don't admit the real truth
Yes there probably are and the real truth is?
Not everyone is honest, how many people 'cannot accommodate' would give the real reason they can't. Either in a relationship or live parents
Totally get that and I'm sure there plenty who aren't as open as you, but being a cheat doesn't make you a remotely honest person. See it this way, why would a stranger on here trust someone to have reapect for them when they clearly don't have any respect for their own partner? "
This. If your relationship is that bad then finish it. I had to let go of a decade long partnership because we'd drifted apart and wanted different things. Yes it was painful, probably one of the most difficult times of my life but we're both better off now than being stuck in a dead end... |
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong "
So OP; Mrs fancies you, we invite you round and I sit back as you both have mind blowing sex; how exactly does that help put the spark back into YOUR relationship?
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"I had the same when I started a couple of years ago, don't worry about it, I come on the forum and put something Similar and was told just be honest and to be patient as a lot of people sign up wanting a quick turn around.
That's what I thought be honest, seen others put on their in a relationship, just have to be patient
Even the socials turn on married men trust me I’ve been there "
Are you surprised??
Really? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"he should do what he wants to do ?? it not for anyone to tell him right or wrong
Thanks for that, not looking for sides just wanted to be honest on my profile. Yes I perhaps shouldn't be cheating but sometimes long relationships need a spark....is that so wrong "
i dissagree with everything your doing but its not my place to say you cant do this or that |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!!
Whoa there!!
Calling out women as Miserable will do you NO favours at all!
Have you really looked at your profile?
Firstly, 3 pics of your Dick!
Really? Do you think that potential meet people will recognise you by your Cock? Ditch these 3 photos to Friends or Private and put up a Face and / or Torso pic!
Your profile is written as a list of Bullet Points. You need to move it into Paragraphs.
Also, research has shown that starting each point or sentence with "I" in any written description, puts people off reading it.
But read your first line again. The inclusion of "not meeting due to a health issue" is a perfect example of shooting yourself in the foot!
Just say you are looking to chat first and take it from there.
Look on the Firum Index for other threads all asking the same as you and heed the advice.
Look at the FAB advice page for Newcomers. It states quite clearly that a No Response or Reply, is indicative of the recipient ISN'T INTERESTED! It's clear to see!
Consider that women get swamped with messages, running into 100's. They don't have time or the inclination to wade through all these messages and reply to each one!
It doesn't work that way! The ladies can afford to be picky and choose to contact the guys who have put in the effort in both their profile and approach.
They also note those Males who come out with negative comments on FAB.
TRUST the advice given to varied similar threads on here.
Good Luck!"
Over 60 getting regular meets and never whining or complaining, can you not just start a fab master class or something, take these guys to hand |
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Hmmmm…. You’re not painting yourself in the best light here OP I can’t lie.
All of this talk of “records” and messaging “loads of women”. You make it sound like you’re seeking conquests to brag about and gain notches on the bed post.
Maybe you need to dial down on what it is you look for in a woman and message those who match your preferences instead of a scattergun approach. |
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You need to understand that success on swinging site like this takes time and patience - more so if you are a single guy (us lot are ten a penny compared to females and couples). When I joined my first swinging site nearly 20 years ago, I didn't get my first meet until after 10 MONTHS. After that, word of mouth got around with their contacts and friends, and I was recommended to other couples.
If you're serious about swinging, you need to be patient, and persevere. Don't let a refusal or no response knock you back. Just move on, and keep trying.
If it's just a "wham, bam, thank-you mam" you're after behind your partner's back, may I suggest you look for a site advertising working girls, at a cost. |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!! "
A certain word in you bio will put 99.9% of people off |
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By *issyEMWoman
over a year ago
Nearly |
"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated
"Must be safe sex but would do bareback if the lady prefers" doesn't really make sense."
Ffs ! Seriously?!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The rules are different for single men single women couples etc and single men have it harder I suppose. Once you accept that premise you won't be frustrated and it won't get you down. Chin up! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated "
My top tips:
- Your profile is a little bit all about "you", add a bit more about what you have to offer when you meet someone, go beyond the "give pleasure", remember for women sex is an emotional/ physical experience - not just a quick relief.
- You have said discretion is required but you have a face pic in public, that's a red flag for drama
- "average dad bod to suit (actually not in bad shape if I say so myself)" let people be the judge of that. Body attraction is subjective.
- "and am looking for that naughty spark to get me going." sounds like the person you will meet has to do all the work?
- "Can travel, but not at the drop of a hat we would need to message and arrange what works for both parties." this is good but I would say how you respect people's time also. Everyone is busy
Hopefully that helps a little.
When messaging someone, read their profile, ask them about them or something specific on their profile or in their pictures.
XOXOX
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for the advice people, I have altered and lengthened my profile hopefully it will make it a bit better. Anybody want to view it and give me feedback much appreciated
My top tips:
- Your profile is a little bit all about "you", add a bit more about what you have to offer when you meet someone, go beyond the "give pleasure", remember for women sex is an emotional/ physical experience - not just a quick relief.
- You have said discretion is required but you have a face pic in public, that's a red flag for drama
- "average dad bod to suit (actually not in bad shape if I say so myself)" let people be the judge of that. Body attraction is subjective.
- "and am looking for that naughty spark to get me going." sounds like the person you will meet has to do all the work?
- "Can travel, but not at the drop of a hat we would need to message and arrange what works for both parties." this is good but I would say how you respect people's time also. Everyone is busy
Hopefully that helps a little.
When messaging someone, read their profile, ask them about them or something specific on their profile or in their pictures.
XOXOX
"
Thanks for the pointers, some really good advice and I appreciate your input xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself."
Yeah, it's crap on here. I have better luck pulling girls at work. (Jk, jk). I'm just here for the banter and occasional conversation. Anyhow, It's probably not that you aren't attractive enough. It's just you're not niche enough. Being average on here doesn't cut it pal. |
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"I have messaged loads of women on here, but either it never gets read or when it does they don't reply. I know they probably get load's of mail everyday, but just something to say one way or the other would be nice. Starting to think maybe I'm not attractive enough or something wrong with my profile, seriously making think about deleting myself.
Yeah, it's crap on here. I have better luck pulling girls at work. (Jk, jk). I'm just here for the banter and occasional conversation. Anyhow, It's probably not that you aren't attractive enough. It's just you're not niche enough. Being average on here doesn't cut it pal. "
You have been here 4 weeks what exactly did you expect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You have been here 4 weeks what exactly did you expect"
I've used fab on and off for years - never had a single meet up. I'm not bothered, because I don't need it to meet women. However, most guys on here are probably wasting their time if they're expecting meets. It's an endless cycle of messages and ghosting. |
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"You have been here 4 weeks what exactly did you expect
I've used fab on and off for years - never had a single meet up. I'm not bothered, because I don't need it to meet women. However, most guys on here are probably wasting their time if they're expecting meets. It's an endless cycle of messages and ghosting. "
And yet I've not had this problem and continue to get meets and chat with loads of people
Maybe it's the way most guys approach others with there opening message |
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By *eliusMan
over a year ago
Henlow |
"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!!
Yeah, we are all miserable. How dare we not reply to every message in our inboxes from guys we aren’t interested in. It’s out of order if you ask me. "
It is, shame on you! You’ve let fab down, you’ve let your friends down and most importantly you’ve probably let your knickers down. Go to the naughty step, this instance |
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I’m on here as a couple and a single. Both profile get very little attention. Been here 6 years. I’ve used the forum to maximise my profile. I’ve realised that you should have no expectations get yourself to clubs and socials find a local Kik group show off your personality |
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You are attached so that's an instant no for me and many women. But some really don't care so I guess it's just a matter of finding those people. But I do appreciate the honesty.i presume you have worked on your profile because it looks fine to me.
Good luck and I hope you partner didn't find out. |
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I’m surprised people are getting zero success after several years on here.
I’ve had several meets, mostly very good. (Don’t judge me on quantity of veris. There are enough to show I’m real, nothing else) |
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"I'm in the same boat as you. I've sent alot of messages to women, few have read but most don't read and some of them have blocked me.
I have put alot of info on my profile, but still get no reply. What wrong with these women in these days...miserable I guess!!!
We’re all busy fucking other people. HTH!!!"
|
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"I’m surprised people are getting zero success after several years on here.
I’ve had several meets, mostly very good. (Don’t judge me on quantity of veris. There are enough to show I’m real, nothing else) "
I’m not surprised women have free will and choice. I have verifications, mainly from clubs, but don’t expect anything from anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m on here as a couple and a single. Both profile get very little attention. Been here 6 years. I’ve used the forum to maximise my profile. I’ve realised that you should have no expectations get yourself to clubs and socials find a local Kik group show off your personality "
I've heard this a lot - Men should get themselves down to clubs/socials. Thus, making the website borderline useless for most men. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You are attached so that's an instant no for me and many women. But some really don't care so I guess it's just a matter of finding those people. But I do appreciate the honesty.i presume you have worked on your profile because it looks fine to me.
Good luck and I hope you partner didn't find out."
I thought I should just be honest in my profile, thanks for the advice |
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"I’m on here as a couple and a single. Both profile get very little attention. Been here 6 years. I’ve used the forum to maximise my profile. I’ve realised that you should have no expectations get yourself to clubs and socials find a local Kik group show off your personality
I've heard this a lot - Men should get themselves down to clubs/socials. Thus, making the website borderline useless for most men. "
Socials and clubs are the best way to get verified. Generally if you get good verifications from clubs it shows you are respectful and friendly. The site is always going to be tough as a single guy due to the numbers of single men to single ladies and couples are more interested in ladies then gents. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Just to add to previous comments; I've currently got 208 unread messages from the last 3 days.
I have a life. It's literally impossible for me to reply to everyone!
If you want me to reply - be different. Don't just be another dick pic.
Read my damn profile. Don't just say "hey hows you?". Don't start off the bat asking to meet me in the first sentence.
Give me SOME display of personality! A joke? Something light and flirty?
Also - guys - sending a lady a 400 word bit of erotica about what you want to do to her in your first ever interaction is SUPER off-putting!
You'll figure out your rhythm though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" Also - guys - sending a lady a 400 word bit of erotica about what you want to do to her in your first ever interaction is SUPER off-putting! "
i get this all the time like a scrip to a porn film not only a turn off but its a insant block ..not the sort of guys i want to meet ....im very openminded and no prude i like alot of different sex too but seeing a pre plan script is terrible |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m on here as a couple and a single. Both profile get very little attention. Been here 6 years. I’ve used the forum to maximise my profile. I’ve realised that you should have no expectations get yourself to clubs and socials find a local Kik group show off your personality
I've heard this a lot - Men should get themselves down to clubs/socials. Thus, making the website borderline useless for most men.
Socials and clubs are the best way to get verified. Generally if you get good verifications from clubs it shows you are respectful and friendly. The site is always going to be tough as a single guy due to the numbers of single men to single ladies and couples are more interested in ladies then gents. "
You actually a raise a good point. Getting a verification or two would massively help some men on here. However, this site is literally the worst for ghosting, messages being ignored etc... It's a numbers game for sure. But let's not pretend 'Just adding a few more photos' or 'Editing your profile' will in any way help most men on here. I think we just need to be honest - for many, it's just not worth the hassle. |
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