FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Maybe I'm just too weird??
Maybe I'm just too weird??
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Hi all, this may turn out to be just another man moaning about how difficult it is on here but I'll try to avoid it!
I had some success on fab a couple of years ago but last year I must have messaged well over 100 women and got virtually no replies. I always write messages based on the profile, no "hey wanna fuck" or endless copy paste spamming, so it takes quite a bit of time and is frankly a bit soul destroying to get nothing back. Most women don't even appear to read the message or view my profile (although I understand its possible to view a profile without the person knowing?)
I'm just wondering if anything changed at some point? Are women being even more inundated by men over the last year? Or is it me? Maybe by trying to stand out I just come across weird lol 
Any suggestions gratefully received oh wise and all knowing fabbers x |
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I think it is a well written profile with tasteful photos. Maybe don't mention you live in a motorhome and hygiene can be tricky ? If you do feel the need to mention it, I would put it at the bottom, rather than the top. It's you who is most important to potential meets, not where you live.
Good luck.
Is your cat called Nemo ? |
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"Hi all, this may turn out to be just another man moaning about how difficult it is on here but I'll try to avoid it!
I had some success on fab a couple of years ago but last year I must have messaged well over 100 women and got virtually no replies. I always write messages based on the profile, no "hey wanna fuck" or endless copy paste spamming, so it takes quite a bit of time and is frankly a bit soul destroying to get nothing back. Most women don't even appear to read the message or view my profile (although I understand its possible to view a profile without the person knowing?)
I'm just wondering if anything changed at some point? Are women being even more inundated by men over the last year? Or is it me? Maybe by trying to stand out I just come across weird lol
Any suggestions gratefully received oh wise and all knowing fabbers x"
Well your profile certainly caught my eye.. however unfortunately I shall be turning 45 in a couple of weeks and distance is a bit of a problem...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I liked your profile too. Your choice for no face photos but you've got cool glasses, can't we have a closer shot?
Your age range, could you add on a couple of years? It would open up more possibilities for you.
But it's your choice always x |
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"I think it is a well written profile with tasteful photos. Maybe don't mention you live in a motorhome and hygiene can be tricky ? If you do feel the need to mention it, I would put it at the bottom, rather than the top. It's you who is most important to potential meets, not where you live.
Good luck.
Is your cat called Nemo ?"
Thanks, I've rearranged it and reworded things slightly, not Nemo I'm afraid lol. |
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"You're too athletic and handsome, that's the prob. If you were balding with middle aged spread like me you'd be fending off the ladies with that stick in pic #1 "
Well I did hear Dad bods are the in thing, maybe its worth a shot lol |
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"Hi all, this may turn out to be just another man moaning about how difficult it is on here but I'll try to avoid it!
I had some success on fab a couple of years ago but last year I must have messaged well over 100 women and got virtually no replies. I always write messages based on the profile, no "hey wanna fuck" or endless copy paste spamming, so it takes quite a bit of time and is frankly a bit soul destroying to get nothing back. Most women don't even appear to read the message or view my profile (although I understand its possible to view a profile without the person knowing?)
I'm just wondering if anything changed at some point? Are women being even more inundated by men over the last year? Or is it me? Maybe by trying to stand out I just come across weird lol
Any suggestions gratefully received oh wise and all knowing fabbers x
Well your profile certainly caught my eye.. however unfortunately I shall be turning 45 in a couple of weeks and distance is a bit of a problem... "
Distance doesn't really matter in a motorhome lol, just timing! I've already driven around the country once this year! |
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"I liked your profile too. Your choice for no face photos but you've got cool glasses, can't we have a closer shot?
Your age range, could you add on a couple of years? It would open up more possibilities for you.
But it's your choice always x"
Oh yeah I dont think I've updated that age range since I joined, good point! 
I'm always worried that its the face pics that are off-putting lol, I send them with a first message anyway but there's not much I can do about the mug  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just my opinion obvs but I thought your profile was well written, concise …and just a bit too white bread. Basically it reads you will make a woman orgasm and you own a motor home. Nice photos, but the whole thing just needs some energy and individuality. Show your personality. |
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I’m not sure how attractive living in a motor home is to people, you may be fishing in a small pond in that respect.
Otherwise it’s perfectly fine, perhaps a bit bland, almost you’re trying to not be unappealing, maybe you need to take a risk a show a bit more personality? |
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"Just my opinion obvs but I thought your profile was well written, concise …and just a bit too white bread. Basically it reads you will make a woman orgasm and you own a motor home. Nice photos, but the whole thing just needs some energy and individuality. Show your personality. "
Thanks, I kept removing stuff i thought might be off-putting and I guess it has gone a bit too far the other way  |
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"I’m not sure how attractive living in a motor home is to people, you may be fishing in a small pond in that respect.
Otherwise it’s perfectly fine, perhaps a bit bland, almost you’re trying to not be unappealing, maybe you need to take a risk a show a bit more personality?"
Personality you say? Damn this is gonna be tougher than I thought!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was on here before COVID and like you I write each message to suit the individual and would get replies 7 out of 10 times , some were a polite no thanks , but the reply percentages were better than on plenty of fish, which I always thought
This time round I’ve had just two messages , I’ve got to the point now where I just let the pushy single guys send thousands of messages and at some point I’ll get one from someone interesting
That will make up for the void !! |
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"I was on here before COVID and like you I write each message to suit the individual and would get replies 7 out of 10 times , some were a polite no thanks , but the reply percentages were better than on plenty of fish, which I always thought
This time round I’ve had just two messages , I’ve got to the point now where I just let the pushy single guys send thousands of messages and at some point I’ll get one from someone interesting
That will make up for the void !!"
Yeah its odd, I wonder if covid just brought a lot more men to fab when all the nightclubs were closed! |
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Thanks for the feedback all, I've made a few profile amendments. Although I think my issue is more with the messages I send. I massively overthink most things and in trying to come up with something that's relevant to their profile but also hopefully unique I probably just make people go "what the fuck is this guy on about?"
For example trying to start a conversation by raising the question of the divergence of moral principles and the societies we live in is clearly going to have limited success. On the other hand if you say in your profile you don't like small talk then maybe that's on you  |
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"I think it is a well written profile with tasteful photos. Maybe don't mention you live in a motorhome and hygiene can be tricky ? If you do feel the need to mention it, I would put it at the bottom, rather than the top. It's you who is most important to potential meets, not where you live.
Good luck.
Is your cat called Nemo ?"
Hygiene is very important for meets, and now he will have taken that part out  |
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By *aimeDWoman
over a year ago
Shaftesbury, Dorset |
I’m sorry you’re not having much luck, there’s nothing off putting for me in your profile so I can only think it is just the bold problem of numbers. Hope you have more success soon |
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"For example trying to start a conversation by raising the question of the divergence of moral principles and the societies we live in is clearly going to have limited success. On the other hand if you say in your profile you don't like small talk then maybe that's on you "
I mean, that's exactly the sort of message that I would give more than a dismissive 2 word response to.
But admittedly I am a bit of weirdo. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d echo the comments already made. Your profile looks good.
You've got freedom to travel around and have your own moveable accommodation for overnight stays, so that’s a great position to be in.
Rather than sending messages to different people all the time and getting little back, you’d probably have more fun visiting clubs and getting to know the regular attendees of the club nights that are a good match for what you are looking for. |
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Your profile looks decent to be fair. You are looking for a very small pool on fab…women. And a lot (not saying all) tend to stick to clubs for meeting others. Would definitely recommend an organised social or a club. X |
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"I think it is a well written profile with tasteful photos. Maybe don't mention you live in a motorhome and hygiene can be tricky ? If you do feel the need to mention it, I would put it at the bottom, rather than the top. It's you who is most important to potential meets, not where you live.
Good luck.
Is your cat called Nemo ?
Hygiene is very important for meets, and now he will have taken that part out "
Apparently it's easier rather than tricky! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your profile comes across as very good to us
Nice pictures and an amusing write up.
Think it’s just the numbers going against you buddy.
Keep the faith and play the long game. |
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One of the better profiles on here. If you were closer (or passing through) and able to send face pics, we'd certainly be interested.
Think there's been a huge influx of single guys over lockdown and a large number of them are rude, vulgar, demanding and not even looking for real meets. It means single women and us couples are getting more "junk" mail and more let-downs and that means you just have a bigger haystack to get your needle found in.
(Bry) |
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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago
shropshire |
"Hi all, this may turn out to be just another man moaning about how difficult it is on here but I'll try to avoid it!
I had some success on fab a couple of years ago but last year I must have messaged well over 100 women and got virtually no replies. I always write messages based on the profile, no "hey wanna fuck" or endless copy paste spamming, so it takes quite a bit of time and is frankly a bit soul destroying to get nothing back. Most women don't even appear to read the message or view my profile (although I understand its possible to view a profile without the person knowing?)
I'm just wondering if anything changed at some point? Are women being even more inundated by men over the last year? Or is it me? Maybe by trying to stand out I just come across weird lol
Any suggestions gratefully received oh wise and all knowing fabbers x"
Apart from women getting loads of messages anyway. I think it has changed alot since covid alot have left the site and single guys luck of the draw but don't give up  |
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