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Must be exceptional ?
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"It means they don't want to deal with mediocrity  what do you class as mediocrity ? . Beer belly ? Small cock ? ."
I'm guessing they want to highlight they not looking for anyone / everything available. |
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"It means they don't want to deal with mediocrity what do you class as mediocrity ? . Beer belly ? Small cock ? .
I'm guessing they want to highlight they not looking for anyone / everything available. "
i dont have a problem with that . People gave types . Just find it bit odd when they put exceptional or high standards. Each too there own . |
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"It means they don't want to deal with mediocrity what do you class as mediocrity ? . Beer belly ? Small cock ? .
I'm guessing they want to highlight they not looking for anyone / everything available. i dont have a problem with that . People gave types . Just find it bit odd when they put exceptional or high standards. Each too there own . "
I think if you're going to state that you have high standards you should give a hint as to what they are. I usually assume that I wouldn't meet them, It's safer and avoids that awful moment when they run screaming for the hills.  |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life."
i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic. "
No reason you can't shoot your shot. Most people will be exceptional for someone.
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic. "
Yes, I would but then I would expect someone to demonstrate they meet our standards, rather than just say it. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic. "
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
No reason you can't shoot your shot. Most people will be exceptional for someone.
"
true but i guess after my post they'll think im a exceptional bell end lol. All good fun live and let live . |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction."
It’s a buyer’s market. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction."
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations "
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently"
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently"
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook? |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms."
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
|
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook?"
This is a false equivalence.
In order to attract customers a chef actually does have to say it if they have that star.
Fab is set up in a particular way with a gallery to display photos and a bio to share information.
There isn't any way to 'demonstrate' anything beyond that unless you meet.
Of course there is verifications but in my opinion if someone is already so up themselves as to set unreachable standards then there is gonna be no pleasing them on any terms.
|
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook?"
What reason (apart from the smoke alarm and smell of burnt toast) have I to disbelieve you?
If I say I'm a decent person, very attractive facially with a great body would you believe me? |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms.
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
"
when i was on fab many years ago i didnt do brilliant. But got some good reviews if thats the right word from people in clubs . Does that help ? |
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"It means they don't want to deal with mediocrity what do you class as mediocrity ? . Beer belly ? Small cock ? ."
People that don't excite me.
The aesthetics or physical build are pretty irrelevant to me. Personally |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms.
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
when i was on fab many years ago i didnt do brilliant. But got some good reviews if thats the right word from people in clubs . Does that help ? "
In what way? |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms.
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
"
For sure the 'nice guy' thing is definitely it's own thing.
An attractive profile is more then the sum of its parts and some things, particularly things that are very subjective, can be redundant and don't need to be said literally.
There's more than one way to make an impression though. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms.
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
when i was on fab many years ago i didnt do brilliant. But got some good reviews if thats the right word from people in clubs . Does that help ?
In what way? "
to get a meet |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
What does that even mean? How do you show it? Are we talking live demonstrations?
I don't think would take anyone seriously if they spoke in those terms.
There was a thread the other day about men describing themselves as 'nice' or a 'gentleman '. This was designated by some as a red flag.
when i was on fab many years ago i didnt do brilliant. But got some good reviews if thats the right word from people in clubs . Does that help ?
In what way? to get a meet"
Honestly, I have no real idea. I wish I did because it would solve a lot of people's problems  |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic. "
You show that you're exceptional. You don't claim it. (I've never asked for exceptional or claimed to want it, but when I've asked for things like "someone who respects me as a person" or something like that - people who say "yeah babe I totally respect you" get nowhere, whereas people who demonstrate respect might get somewhere) |
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"It means they don't want to deal with mediocrity what do you class as mediocrity ? . Beer belly ? Small cock ? .
People that don't excite me.
The aesthetics or physical build are pretty irrelevant to me. Personally "
 |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
You show that you're exceptional. You don't claim it. (I've never asked for exceptional or claimed to want it, but when I've asked for things like "someone who respects me as a person" or something like that - people who say "yeah babe I totally respect you" get nowhere, whereas people who demonstrate respect might get somewhere)"
I think if you respond to profiles requesting exceptional you are claiming it. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
You show that you're exceptional. You don't claim it. (I've never asked for exceptional or claimed to want it, but when I've asked for things like "someone who respects me as a person" or something like that - people who say "yeah babe I totally respect you" get nowhere, whereas people who demonstrate respect might get somewhere)
I think if you respond to profiles requesting exceptional you are claiming it. "
Well, assuming the profile text has been read.
But I think overtly claiming it makes people look a bit full of themselves (so is asking for it, but that's another thread) - whereas I suppose it can be demonstrated, like respect. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
You show that you're exceptional. You don't claim it. (I've never asked for exceptional or claimed to want it, but when I've asked for things like "someone who respects me as a person" or something like that - people who say "yeah babe I totally respect you" get nowhere, whereas people who demonstrate respect might get somewhere)
I think if you respond to profiles requesting exceptional you are claiming it. "
I agree but with the caveat that you are only claiming the possibility of it in that particular subjective case |
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"Im more confused lol. So if someone puts you must be exceptional, is it ok for people to ask what they mean ? If it doesnt state on there profile . "
My experience is that asking those questions doesn't tend to get good results.
I agree that it's not clear what it means and is probably unhelpful. (It's why I don't say it) |
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"Im more confused lol. So if someone puts you must be exceptional, is it ok for people to ask what they mean ? If it doesnt state on there profile . "
I don't think it matters. You have nothing to lose by throwing your name in the hat if you find someone attractive and you think you might be a match based on the info on their profile or even just from the overall vibe you get based on what you can see. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook?
This is a false equivalence.
In order to attract customers a chef actually does have to say it if they have that star.
Fab is set up in a particular way with a gallery to display photos and a bio to share information.
There isn't any way to 'demonstrate' anything beyond that unless you meet.
Of course there is verifications but in my opinion if someone is already so up themselves as to set unreachable standards then there is gonna be no pleasing them on any terms.
"
For us it would be about how the person interacts with us, their pictures will have a part to play too, but largely it’s about the interaction. We will talk to someone we think might be right for us before we decide. We don’t expect people to be exceptional but we do have standards.
Some people, men especially (but not just men), seem to think that they are owed something because they send a message or that people should set out criteria that if they can show they meet then they get free entry to someone’s pants. But life, and attraction, don’t work like that.
When it comes down to it life isn’t fair, and everyone has the option to just move on if they don’t like what someone puts on their profile. |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook?
This is a false equivalence.
In order to attract customers a chef actually does have to say it if they have that star.
Fab is set up in a particular way with a gallery to display photos and a bio to share information.
There isn't any way to 'demonstrate' anything beyond that unless you meet.
Of course there is verifications but in my opinion if someone is already so up themselves as to set unreachable standards then there is gonna be no pleasing them on any terms.
For us it would be about how the person interacts with us, their pictures will have a part to play too, but largely it’s about the interaction. We will talk to someone we think might be right for us before we decide. We don’t expect people to be exceptional but we do have standards.
Some people, men especially (but not just men), seem to think that they are owed something because they send a message or that people should set out criteria that if they can show they meet then they get free entry to someone’s pants. But life, and attraction, don’t work like that.
When it comes down to it life isn’t fair, and everyone has the option to just move on if they don’t like what someone puts on their profile."
fair point me personally if i was going say to a meet or just to a club id never expect to play . If you play thats a bonus. I know from before that some guys go expecting some action then sulk when they dont get any . |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? . "
It probably has different meaning to different people. Having standards or looking for exceptional spices is great. Stating that in a profile is a bit arrogant imho. It’s like someone entering a bar and shouting aloud that she/he/they have high standards. I am staying clear of such profiles. People with manner know they don’t need to shout I HAVE MANNERS.
|
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
There is but I've seen so many people lately say that you need to show that you're good not say it. Saying it means you can't be it apparently
I can say I'm a Michelin star chef, would you believe me without tasting the food I cook?
This is a false equivalence.
In order to attract customers a chef actually does have to say it if they have that star.
Fab is set up in a particular way with a gallery to display photos and a bio to share information.
There isn't any way to 'demonstrate' anything beyond that unless you meet.
Of course there is verifications but in my opinion if someone is already so up themselves as to set unreachable standards then there is gonna be no pleasing them on any terms.
For us it would be about how the person interacts with us, their pictures will have a part to play too, but largely it’s about the interaction. We will talk to someone we think might be right for us before we decide. We don’t expect people to be exceptional but we do have standards.
Some people, men especially (but not just men), seem to think that they are owed something because they send a message or that people should set out criteria that if they can show they meet then they get free entry to someone’s pants. But life, and attraction, don’t work like that.
When it comes down to it life isn’t fair, and everyone has the option to just move on if they don’t like what someone puts on their profile."
I agree with this. I think that's reasonable and isn't the same as demanding someone demonstrate that they are exceptional.
Of course some people will have a sense of entitlement. It's also very common to encounter this as a single guy as some people seem to be under the impression that as there is a surplus of men that they don't need to show respect. And of course it doesn't help that there are been that are willing to be trod on so they can get there end away in any circumstances.
Speaking for myself, I do seek out unique and exceptional people and experiences. That's not any kind of unreasonable standard I've set or expect anyone to measure up to. I couldn't define it.
It's just my preference and I know it when I see it. |
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"
I agree with this. I think that's reasonable and isn't the same as demanding someone demonstrate that they are exceptional.
Of course some people will have a sense of entitlement. It's also very common to encounter this as a single guy as some people seem to be under the impression that as there is a surplus of men that they don't need to show respect. And of course it doesn't help that there are been that are willing to be trod on so they can get there end away in any circumstances.
Speaking for myself, I do seek out unique and exceptional people and experiences. That's not any kind of unreasonable standard I've set or expect anyone to measure up to. I couldn't define it.
It's just my preference and I know it when I see it. "
I agree with this, too.
I don't know if what I'm looking for is "exceptional", in terms of my standards, and like you I know it when I see it.
I don't put it on my profile partly because it's so difficult to define, and even more so if you're not in my head! |
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I think everyone is being very coy today - we all know what “exceptional” means in a fab context on those profiles: it is related to one of a few physical characteristics.
Exactly what characteristic the profile is asking for might vary slightly but it invariably means one of attractiveness, physical fitness, size etc.
We can all throw our hands up in mock horror and shock but let’s not beat around the bush that we don’t know what’s being talked about. |
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"
I agree with this. I think that's reasonable and isn't the same as demanding someone demonstrate that they are exceptional.
Of course some people will have a sense of entitlement. It's also very common to encounter this as a single guy as some people seem to be under the impression that as there is a surplus of men that they don't need to show respect. And of course it doesn't help that there are been that are willing to be trod on so they can get there end away in any circumstances.
Speaking for myself, I do seek out unique and exceptional people and experiences. That's not any kind of unreasonable standard I've set or expect anyone to measure up to. I couldn't define it.
It's just my preference and I know it when I see it.
I agree with this, too.
I don't know if what I'm looking for is "exceptional", in terms of my standards, and like you I know it when I see it.
I don't put it on my profile partly because it's so difficult to define, and even more so if you're not in my head!"
I find it so difficult to say what it is that I find attractive, I can far more easily say what I don’t. You can be tall or short, fabulous or slim, redhead or brunette. It genuinely doesn’t matter so long as you have that ‘something’. |
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By *rpeggioCouple 15 weeks ago
Baughurst |
It means very little to us and definitely a red flag for us.
It means people who are likely to open a Fab thread, or contribute to it, complaining that it's impossible to find in Fab great men/women/couples/tv-ts or whatever they are looking for.
People who confuse being rightfully ultra selective and wanting all their boxes ticked before meeting someone, with finding people of exceptional qualities on characteristics that are subjective to the person/couple.
Anyone is exceptional for someone if they meet all the expectations of that someone. |
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By *oxy jWoman 15 weeks ago
somerset |
for me sexual attraction is a must there has to be that before anything else but its not the only thing because i also need to know that we will get on and generally things feel right for a meet that will mean 99.99% will not be for me but even with 99.99% of people not being for me you'll be surprise how many that leaves to pick from...
the thing is with couples as specially as time rolls by ie the more years your on the scene (with single women too i think)you get to know more and more swingers you get to have the phone numbers of those you like and have played with and those who are just great friends so seeking fun is easy after 30+ years on the scene i could if i wish play every single day with people im sexually attracted to just from my little black book meanimg i dont really need fab (i do as i like new people too) so alot of swinmging couple on here dont even need fab to play...
men have it extremely tough on here 100 men to 1 woman/couple some areas those numbers are alot higher then add in 1000s of men joining daily and very few womrn / couples joining in fact i think more have left sadly .... then with those numbers factor in 75% of women /couples dont need fab to meet/dont meet/ not swingers / or fake profiles that are indeed just more men then you'll find attraction is the least of your worries just being spotted will be hard...
theres a lovely person on here whos quoted on these forum something thats very true most people do not like other people and its very true every body has a preference of what the want when it comes to swinging some very strictly stick to it (holds hands up) and some noot so but there has to be attraction of some sorts so when someone says must be exceptional they are saying they wont fuck anyone that what most women / couples do sadly i i do mean sadly most men are not the same the just see the anyhole a goal and infact alot of men will look for women who are the complete opposite of who they whould date so they dont feel to guilty when cheating on wife / girlfriend and ;ets face it at least 75% of men on here are in relationships....
the one thing that is correct and that is your on the best site for swinging but are most of the men who joined looking for the lifestyle or just a wet hole to release there frustration 
ps i love men and im only here for men... women and couples are easier away from the internet
lastly thos men who only meet with others whom they are sexually attracted to ie picky tend to do very well i wonder why?? if guys where to be more selective than fuck anything for the sake of empty balls i suspect they would get more rather than less or zero |
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"It means very little to us and definitely a red flag for us.
It means people who are likely to open a Fab thread, or contribute to it, complaining that it's impossible to find in Fab great men/women/couples/tv-ts or whatever they are looking for.
People who confuse being rightfully ultra selective and wanting all their boxes ticked before meeting someone, with finding people of exceptional qualities on characteristics that are subjective to the person/couple.
Anyone is exceptional for someone if they meet all the expectations of that someone."
Well said! |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? . "
I don't know, it's very subject isn't it? Personally I take this a bit of a red flag as regards their nature/personally. It's gives off vibes to me that don't meet my standards attitude. Definitely not a statement that attracts me to a profile. |
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By *oxy jWoman 14 weeks ago
somerset |
"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
More often than not , it means absolutely nothing.
They've seen it on another profile."
i agree with this ...and sometimes its to help with filters.. i think its just another way of saying we wont fuck anyone |
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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations "
This is what has me flummoxed. You have someone saying I'm amazing, I am the zenith... Your describing amazing? Yes and your describing me, amazing...etc but how is that knowing your value? I know that's not what you said, but it got me thinking.... Is my value any less because so and so says they are perfection.....? Doesn't everyone have the same value? We all shit and piss one way or another, why when someone says they are amazing....does it seem like they are trying to differentiate themselves from everyone else and seem as if they are better? everyone is amazing, why is your amazingness noteworthy?
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
This is what has me flummoxed. You have someone saying I'm amazing, I am the zenith... Your describing amazing? Yes and your describing me, amazing...etc but how is that knowing your value? I know that's not what you said, but it got me thinking.... Is my value any less because so and so says they are perfection.....? Doesn't everyone have the same value? We all shit and piss one way or another, why when someone says they are amazing....does it seem like they are trying to differentiate themselves from everyone else and seem as if they are better? everyone is amazing, why is your amazingness noteworthy?
"
I feel that my value isn't measured by comparison to anyone else. That kind of value is hard won for a lot of people. It's self love and it creates self worth.
The simplest example for me would be avoiding some women because I thought they were out of my league. It took me a long time to stop thinking like that.
So now if I saw a profile that said, 'I am only interested in exceptional men and exceptional experiences and I found that person attractive, I wouldn't hesitate to get in touch because I have at least as much chance of being exceptional in the eyes of that person as anyone else does. So I'll role the dice.
In general I find that the people I am most attracted to appear to me as exceptional. So I can accept I may appear thus to others occasionally. And we all are to someone.
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In our experience, it’s an indication that they’re only looking for the same (or more) in terms of attractiveness. This is often subjective and anchored by the individuals themselves. When I see these terms, if we don’t reflect the style (personal or home decor) of the profile, it’s a fool’s errand to message. |
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I don't know, it's very subject isn't it? Personally I take this a bit of a red flag as regards their nature/personally. It's gives off vibes to me that don't meet my standards attitude. Definitely not a statement that attracts me to a profile."
absolutely this! |
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By (user no longer on site) 14 weeks ago
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
That's the thing about fab and life actually. Its fine to ask for the moon but not ok to say you can offer it. I've never really understood this apparent contradiction.
Don't know if I agree. I think it's ok to say yes there's a really good chance I'm the match your looking for so let's explore that.
I guess there's a fine line between knowing oneself and one's value and just bragging and setting unrealistic expectations
This is what has me flummoxed. You have someone saying I'm amazing, I am the zenith... Your describing amazing? Yes and your describing me, amazing...etc but how is that knowing your value? I know that's not what you said, but it got me thinking.... Is my value any less because so and so says they are perfection.....? Doesn't everyone have the same value? We all shit and piss one way or another, why when someone says they are amazing....does it seem like they are trying to differentiate themselves from everyone else and seem as if they are better? everyone is amazing, why is your amazingness noteworthy?
I feel that my value isn't measured by comparison to anyone else. That kind of value is hard won for a lot of people. It's self love and it creates self worth.
The simplest example for me would be avoiding some women because I thought they were out of my league. It took me a long time to stop thinking like that.
So now if I saw a profile that said, 'I am only interested in exceptional men and exceptional experiences and I found that person attractive, I wouldn't hesitate to get in touch because I have at least as much chance of being exceptional in the eyes of that person as anyone else does. So I'll role the dice.
In general I find that the people I am most attracted to appear to me as exceptional. So I can accept I may appear thus to others occasionally. And we all are to someone.
"
Thanks for that, it's given me a different way to think of things. I get 'I find that the people I am most attracted to appear to me as exceptional. So I can accept I may appear thus to others occasionally. And we all are to someone.' But isn't that general dating/ finding someone? If you find them attractive you go for it, you have as much chance as anyone else...
But the rest I maybe missing your point. As I just find it hard to understand why some find the need to keep reminding the forum that they are awesome, drawing attention to their awesomeness making it noteworthy. What makes their awesomeness more than anyone else's? Does anyone actually care? |
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"When people put that or we have high standards, what exactly does that mean ? .
That they use fab to enhance their sex life, not to have a sex life.i fully understand that but if a dude messaged you and said hi im fred im a exceptional guy who would meet your high standards, wouldnt you think man you sound like a right dic.
Yes, I would but then I would expect someone to demonstrate they meet our standards, rather than just say it."
How would they go about demonstrating their standards? Face pic, then what? |
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"...
But the rest I maybe missing your point. As I just find it hard to understand why some find the need to keep reminding the forum that they are awesome, drawing attention to their awesomeness making it noteworthy. What makes their awesomeness more than anyone else's? Does anyone actually care?"
Bragging is rarely an attractive quality. |
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