FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Jelousy and envy in cuckolding dynamics
Jelousy and envy in cuckolding dynamics
Jump to: Newest in thread
As most of my adventures have been as a 'lone wolf', I often wonder how you cuckold men deal with the jealousy of your partner fucking someone else.
Does it cause drama, do you get over it easily, or does it simply not affect you?
What about the traditional view of the man being in charge, and the negative societal opinions of cuckolding?
And, how do you deal with the envy of not getting any sex, or her doing things that she would never do with you - plus staying monogamous and teased, while her body-count rapidly grows?
I guess it isn't a one-size fits all answer - and I know many of you are too turned on to think about it.
But I'm also sure plenty of you experienced some quite powerful feelings when you first embarked on this.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If I wasn't able to handle my emotions, I wouldn't have entered the lifestyle.
And I certainly wouldn't have projected any of it onto others if I was having conflicting feelings anout any aspect of it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I wasn't able to handle my emotions, I wouldn't have entered the lifestyle.
And I certainly wouldn't have projected any of it onto others if I was having conflicting feelings anout any aspect of it. " But did you actually know how you'd react before dipping your toe in? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site) 17 weeks ago
|
Never seen my wife with another guy but I honestly don’t think I’d get jealous at all.
I’ve wanted to see her with another guy for so long now that I don’t think that would even come into it.
It would be such an exciting and amazing experience that I’d only feel pleasure I’d hope. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Never seen my wife with another guy but I honestly don’t think I’d get jealous at all.
I’ve wanted to see her with another guy for so long now that I don’t think that would even come into it.
It would be such an exciting and amazing experience that I’d only feel pleasure I’d hope. "
This guy is asking about full on cuckolding. Not just your wife enjoying casual sex in a stag/vixen manner. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If anything it should be easier in a cuckold dynamic than a dynamic where you just give each other a level of sexual freedom. After all isn't that a huge part of the kink with cuckold dynamic?
But I guess for cucks and guys who just enjoy their women having freedom to pursue their desires the handling is the same. Basically it's a total trust and security in each other and the relationship. And a lot of how that is built is completely open and honest communication. Being able to be completely frank with each other about your desires and how you feel about each other. And when you can open your sex life to others as individuals and fear not from a place of security I'd say you're a very strong and powerful couple indeed. But it's not easy (for some more than others). I can take time, lots of talking and just experience and exposure. I think all of us on here regardless of dynamic learn from experience as we go along. We debrief and work out what has gone right and what has gone wrong. And this is important because sometimes you don't know for sure what will work and what will not work till you do/experience it.
Mr |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If I wasn't able to handle my emotions, I wouldn't have entered the lifestyle.
And I certainly wouldn't have projected any of it onto others if I was having conflicting feelings anout any aspect of it. But did you actually know how you'd react before dipping your toe in?"
I'm not a reactionary person when it comes to this. In other things yes, where it warrants it.
I knew I would feel things, as opposed to react to things. Those feelings drove my desire to dive deeper and explore, but everything rests on those involved.
Every time is and was different , depending on who is involved and what style it's done in.
I'm a very secure person, I fear nothing and deal straight with people. Same in relationships. It made it easier for guys to be involved because they could trust the environment and my girlfriends knew I wasn't easily fazed or angered. Believe it or not, but that balanced approach made the guys try harder with my partners and my partners try different things to wind me up! Great fun.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Been in two cuckold relationships, with me in full time chastity cage so all my gf penetrative sex came from others. We were both submissive, always loved seeing her been taken my worthy cock although not being allowed sex or even to wank was difficult it first.
Although I didn't have sex we had more intimate time than before cuckold with kissing cuddling holding hands and lot and lots of oral |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"As most of my adventures have been as a 'lone wolf', I often wonder how you cuckold men deal with the jealousy of your partner fucking someone else.
Does it cause drama, do you get over it easily, or does it simply not affect you?
What about the traditional view of the man being in charge, and the negative societal opinions of cuckolding?
And, how do you deal with the envy of not getting any sex, or her doing things that she would never do with you - plus staying monogamous and teased, while her body-count rapidly grows?
I guess it isn't a one-size fits all answer - and I know many of you are too turned on to think about it.
But I'm also sure plenty of you experienced some quite powerful feelings when you first embarked on this.
" I think as a seasoned bull the jealousy is a wonderful part of the dynamic of cuckolding, its that urge to see your partner with another man and the jealousy even just a little that he's fucking her and you aren't.
This can be very extreme and almost none existent depending on the couple.
We're all different is the simple answer I guess |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site) 15 weeks ago
|
we live the cuckold lifestyle ie not roleplay and have pretty much since the day we met so thru dating to marriage to now we live this life style for reasons and its what we both alway wanted and did and still doing ... theres never been a ounce of jealousy or drama between us and we are very much a solid couple in all ways .. wew know loads of lifestyle cuckold couples who are the same...
there should be zero jealousy / drama even with all the humiliation involved on fact anyone who says there is jealousy / drama are going about it wrong and wont last as a couple ..
the only jealousy / drama we have experienced is from others ive stopped seeing some guys because of this and years ago had a woman do the same ... if your a club regular then you get to see some jealousy / drama again they dont last..
also remember some see jealousy different ive seen people describe butter fly's or nerves as such but they are just normal emotions not the green eye monster .. jealousy is not good in any form |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *959femxCouple 15 weeks ago
Weston super mare |
"we live the cuckold lifestyle ie not roleplay and have pretty much since the day we met so thru dating to marriage to now we live this life style for reasons and its what we both alway wanted and did and still doing ... theres never been a ounce of jealousy or drama between us and we are very much a solid couple in all ways .. wew know loads of lifestyle cuckold couples who are the same...
there should be zero jealousy / drama even with all the humiliation involved on fact anyone who says there is jealousy / drama are going about it wrong and wont last as a couple ..
the only jealousy / drama we have experienced is from others ive stopped seeing some guys because of this and years ago had a woman do the same ... if your a club regular then you get to see some jealousy / drama again they dont last..
also remember some see jealousy different ive seen people describe butter fly's or nerves as such but they are just normal emotions not the green eye monster .. jealousy is not good in any form"
Exactly 100% this |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"we live the cuckold lifestyle ie not roleplay and have pretty much since the day we met so thru dating to marriage to now we live this life style for reasons and its what we both alway wanted and did and still doing ... theres never been a ounce of jealousy or drama between us and we are very much a solid couple in all ways .. wew know loads of lifestyle cuckold couples who are the same...
there should be zero jealousy / drama even with all the humiliation involved on fact anyone who says there is jealousy / drama are going about it wrong and wont last as a couple ..
the only jealousy / drama we have experienced is from others ive stopped seeing some guys because of this and years ago had a woman do the same ... if your a club regular then you get to see some jealousy / drama again they dont last..
also remember some see jealousy different ive seen people describe butter fly's or nerves as such but they are just normal emotions not the green eye monster .. jealousy is not good in any form
Exactly 100% this "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not Cuckold, so possibly not the best person to reply.
We got into swinging by accident (long story). In short, I said to my Wife I want to go to a swinging club just to experience the environment, not for either of us to play with others.
We both enjoyed the erotic environment and had several visits. Each time one chap in particular spent a lot of time chatting to us in the public areas.
After the 3rd/4th visit, on the way home, the Wife said to me, "I could see his cock whilst chatting" to which I replied "So What" to which she replied "It looked quite nice".
I cannot explain it to this day, but I got an immediate erection and suggested she might like to play with it.
After several more visits and with the same chap, she got more and more adventurous. First it was a massage, then it was a massage with a hand job then a massage with a blow job and finally she put his cock in her.
Again, difficult to explain, on one hand I wanted to punch him, on the other I was so excited and sat there with a rock hard erection.
So in answer to your question, amazing mixed feelings but we absolutely adore having a regular buddy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It is important that as a respectable bull you assess that any jealousy from the cuckold is enhancing the dynamic and not damaging the couples relationship, far to many people play as a bull but the reality is they are just looking for a quick shag and sod the consequences. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not Cuckold, so possibly not the best person to reply.
We got into swinging by accident (long story). In short, I said to my Wife I want to go to a swinging club just to experience the environment, not for either of us to play with others.
We both enjoyed the erotic environment and had several visits. Each time one chap in particular spent a lot of time chatting to us in the public areas.
After the 3rd/4th visit, on the way home, the Wife said to me, "I could see his cock whilst chatting" to which I replied "So What" to which she replied "It looked quite nice".
I cannot explain it to this day, but I got an immediate erection and suggested she might like to play with it.
After several more visits and with the same chap, she got more and more adventurous. First it was a massage, then it was a massage with a hand job then a massage with a blow job and finally she put his cock in her.
Again, difficult to explain, on one hand I wanted to punch him, on the other I was so excited and sat there with a rock hard erection.
So in answer to your question, amazing mixed feelings but we absolutely adore having a regular buddy. " this is really common, I call it beautiful agony |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
You have to detach love from sex when your wife is with someone else x
Imagine you’ve given her a present in human form x
It’s just sex x
You can envy a bigger better guy without being jealous x
If you can’t - don’t do it x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You have to detach love from sex when your wife is with someone else x
Imagine you’ve given her a present in human form x
It’s just sex x
You can envy a bigger better guy without being jealous x love this
If you can’t - don’t do it x"
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You have to detach love from sex when your wife is with someone else x
Imagine you’ve given her a present in human form x
It’s just sex x
You can envy a bigger better guy without being jealous x
If you can’t - don’t do it x"
Sounds like wise words  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You have to detach love from sex when your wife is with someone else x
x"
Jeez talk about dehumanising people.
It's because of love, it's done.
Your partner is not an animal for your entertainment while you "detach".
Talk about abandonment in order to put your own feelings first. Ffs.
Do you re-attach for the aftercare then for your wife who needs it for your live sex show that's free for you then? Yep. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It’s a mixture of emotions, from excitement to stomach churning jealousy for me as a cuck.
I’m lucky to have a beautiful wife, but she has a sexual need to be wanted by other men and enjoys being fucked by them.
In all other ways we have a loving marriage for over 30 years, perhaps if I hadn’t been a cuck we wouldn’t be together, but we spoke about it (and still do) and it’s the lifestyle that suits our relationship.
Probably wouldn’t suit lots of others but works for us.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Would love to feel that pang of jealousy of another man giving my wife the satisfaction I can only ever dream of giving her That jealousy then followed by the realisation I'll never get to fuck her again. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
There was an interesting doc on a particular channel about a year ago. Fascinating stuff... I have had partners play with up to 5 men, but I also tended to have fun at the same event. Each to their own... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
When fantasy becomes reality, you don't really know how you will feel about any of it and sometimes you surprise yourself. I find the reality of another man being intimate with Perky very exciting, whether I'm present or not. We've played around with SPH and that was also fun. However when she and a new bull wanted to go for a romantic dinner together I became very jealous. Go figure. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *manteeCouple 1 week ago
Manchester |
Well in the course of this year we have met and Em has fucked 24 different men, we have only had a big issue with one of them because he got into her head, without my knowledge they were in communication with each other until I found out. He has fucked and cum in her 8 times in 3 meets but we will not be ever seeing him again, my rules |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By *w_cuckCouple 7 days ago
Cambridgeshire |
We have a very strong loving relationship and so my wife only gets fucked by other men for pleasure, I know she will still be my wife after.
Do all guys think about their wife when they have a wank? Is it really that much different? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm not a man, but I am have had a dynamic where my Dom, fucks other women while I sit in the corner.
The jealousy is part of the fun. I'm jealous because I know how good he feels, how desperate I am to have him, and being there but not allowed him is torture. It is a reminder that I'm his and he isn't mine. I imagine it is the same the other way around. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
as a rock solid loving couple who sexually lived the cuckold lifestyle for 30 years not role play but for real i can say from our point of view and many friends we know in this lifestyle that theres no jealousy or drama even with high humiliation situations it the same with solid swingi8ng couples theres no jealousy ... how other play is down to them but we've seen jealousy destroy so many couples |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's the whole point of it right? We had meets where I would either just watch K with the guy or I'd join in. It was me who asked her to try different cock after all. She asked if I minded if she met the guy on her own. I couldn't say no could I? That was the honest meet of all. Knowing she was fucking the guy bareback. Sorry if that's wierd but I never felt a pang of jealousy. Its what guys like me want. Isn't it? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Speaking from the perspective of a solo-poly not currently in a loving relationship.
My perspective is so long as there is good communication and aftercare then jealousy need never be a destructive element when it rears its head. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic