FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Why is it so hard to organise a threesome?
Why is it so hard to organise a threesome?
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I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. |
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By *JohnMan 5 weeks ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
I think a part of it is that the number of men who are comfortable being naked and having sex with another man around is relatively small. Even if you're the focus, there's a lot going on in a small space, and incidental contact is going to happen. That puts a lot of them off.
Clubs and socials are a good place to look. You've already filtered out the fantasists who are never going to leave the house. You get to see what they're like in person and haven't wasted any time if they're not the ones for you. And at a club you've got a better chance of finding men with experience of group sex.
Even with that, it's still not always easy. I have seen, more than once, a woman lying naked on a bed, surrounded by a dozen men wearing only towels, begging for someone to fuck her. I do not understand people sometimes.
If you go the club route, socialise a lot and tell people what you want. If they're interested you can invite them to a private room. At a social, book a room in a hotel nearby so you've got somewhere to go. With a lot of socials there'll often be one hotel that many of the guests stay at, and not everyone remains in their room the whole night.
Good luck!
(The temptation to say "I hear you" was too strong. I am so sorry) |
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Hahaha don't apologise for quoting Matt Berry.
I have attended clubs, both occasions me and my partner found it... Not great. Maybe I need to venture away from Leeds clubs.
I'd love to go to a social, I just don't ever know when and where they are on.
Can you hear me Stephen? |
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Have you considered looking at the MM profiles on here? Most of these MM profiles tend to be a couple of guys who work together on the scene for 3somes/group play rather than gay male couples (as you might imagine). Some of these tag team profiles are held in high regard and have great verifications from women. Naturally they are experienced and comfortable in each others company and with the dynamic. Which is great because a great MFM or MMF is all about teamwork. Could provide you with an easy to organise over ready 3some (and hopefully far more successful than an oven ready Brexit).
Mr |
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By *JohnMan 5 weeks ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
We've been to both of the Leeds clubs - Quest is a bit small, so very dependent on who's there that night, and Pandora is intimidatingly huge. I find ClubF in Stanley is a good size - large enough to have a variety of people, small enough that you can actually talk with them. And there's also Shhh in Newcastle, which I don't have much experience with.
Socials aren't the easiest thing to find. There's the Swinging Club/Event ads forum, which is a nightmare - it's mostly club nights, in SHOUTY ALL CAPS, with no way of filtering. I don't know how people find anything in it.
Then there's the Meets, Events page. Select "list meets", and you can filter by area and "Organised social". I've just tried it for the north east, and there are only three - and only two of those are actual socials. York at the end of next week, and Newcastle in August.
It's a lot of work, however you do it. But a threesome (or a moresome) can be a lot of fun. It's worth the effort. |
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I have had the same issue but I wouldn't says it's because they catch feelings.
I'd probably say it's more likely they are in close proximity to another man and or they don't feel confident enough in front of another man.
There are lots of MM couples on here unless you live in my neck of the woods and then it's tumble! |
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By *bi HaiveMan 5 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
I'd suggest either utilising someone you've already met who has experience with couples, or just bite the bullet and go browsing. MM couples exist, but there's always the chance of you not being interested in/attracted to both, so two singles guys might be the easiest route to finding good matches.
Clubs can be a useful idea, but it would be well worth picking a night where there's a pre-event group chat, so you can get a feel of the guys attending and chat to potentials 1-2-1. It's usually easy to spot guys comfortable in MMF scenarios as they'll have good veris from couples. The fact it would be three singles involved isn't that different a situation.
And yes, definitely worth exploring clubs further afield. There's plenty in the Midlands to choose from and a good variety of different events too.
Happy hunting. 😉 |
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By *bi HaiveMan 5 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Is this aimed at me? I don't own a dick...
Your profile is quite a list of dos and donts though"
They're called preferences.
To be honest it's nice to see something clear and descriptive. It helps people work out if they might be compatible and also comes in very handy for easily identifying those that haven't read a profile. 🤷♂️ |
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By *jonesMan 5 weeks ago
south west |
Quest and pandoras are nice clubs but I can see how you might struggle finding two guys up for a threesum. Chameleons near Birmingham has quite a lot of regular guys that are definitely up for a three sum and even if you went as a single lady the guys often know each other well enough that it you chatted to one they could help you find another...
 |
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By *ister_EMan 5 weeks ago
Hayling Island |
Reply to forum post "Why is it so hard to organise a threesome?"
It really shouldn't be that hard for an attractive women like yourself....
I would tentatively suggest finding a bi fuckbuddy and choosing a third together.
If he is bi then he won't have any issues with other guys joining in and there won't be any stress over proximity, crossed swords, or stray bodily fluids.
Plus both will still love kissing you after you have sucked the other guy off or licking you while the other one is fucking you etc.
Don't be put off if they are Bi, you can still ask them to focus entirely on your pleasure during 3sums. Most of the time when I play with bi couples it still tends to be us guys working together to pleasure her as much and as many times as possible  |
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As a couple I let mr play without me, he’d find a friend in no time to join so I’m surprised this has been hard for you, if you ever consider that route look for the profiles that state they play separately xx |
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It can be hard to get diaries to match up and life does try to get in the way of decent debauchery but you make an effort for things that bring you joy.
One thing that I hear people moan about and experience myself is the no shows / ghosters. I guess if you arrange a club meet if they dont show you can find someone to replace them quickly. |
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" I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome. "
Since a MMF threesome is a male bisexual threesome you’d be best going to a bisexual club event.
A problem to note is too many guys claim to be bi but when it comes to it just play with the women making it more of a MFM threesome. |
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By (user no longer on site) 5 weeks ago
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" I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Since a MMF threesome is a male bisexual threesome you’d be best going to a bisexual club event.
A problem to note is too many guys claim to be bi but when it comes to it just play with the women making it more of a MFM threesome."
To a lot of people MMF simply means 2male 1female, it doesn't mean bi men..
|
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"I have had the same issue but I wouldn't says it's because they catch feelings.
I'd probably say it's more likely they are in close proximity to another man and or they don't feel confident enough in front of another man.
There are lots of MM couples on here unless you live in my neck of the woods and then it's tumble! "
I’ve been involved in a handful of threesomes and twice the other guy has struggled to get it up under pressure |
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By *jonesMan 5 weeks ago
south west |
" I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Since a MMF threesome is a male bisexual threesome you’d be best going to a bisexual club event.
A problem to note is too many guys claim to be bi but when it comes to it just play with the women making it more of a MFM threesome.
To a lot of people MMF simply means 2male 1female, it doesn't mean bi men..
"
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"Have you considered looking at the MM profiles on here? Most of these MM profiles tend to be a couple of guys who work together on the scene for 3somes/group play rather than gay male couples (as you might imagine). Some of these tag team profiles are held in high regard and have great verifications from women. Naturally they are experienced and comfortable in each others company and with the dynamic. Which is great because a great MFM or MMF is all about teamwork. Could provide you with an easy to organise over ready 3some (and hopefully far more successful than an oven ready Brexit).
Mr"
___
I think the advice above is the easiest. Clearly you have tried clubs but you'll end up with random single blokes who attend clubs alone and might end up competing with each other for you, the trophy, to be the alpha. And of course, getting two singles together today sunny know ready other will be the same.
If you were to come to one of our parties you'd have not one but 3 MFM threesomes in one night (and we only invite couples and single women), but finding the right party as a single woman might be tricky.
Lena (Mrs Arpeggio) had a MFM 3some recently at a party that we attended hosted by someone else while I was occupied elsewhere, so it's quite normal for single women and women in couples to have these opportunities at parties.
So our advice is, as says above, approach a team of MM that regularly plays together as a tag team. |
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By *enelope2UWoman 5 weeks ago
Doesn't matter cant block distances |
The sites full of fake fraudsters who have no real social skills to even enable a two sum so a three sum is a long shot. Best is to go to an actual club at least there, those presents are past a keyboard screen and are real and are more likely to be the type that can follow through.
Hope your first is a success it's a wonderful experience with someone experienced.
Spoiled flashbacks!!! |
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"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. "
If your looking on here I'd say look for a MM profile who are looking for women to join.
You might need to travel a bit but I've seen a few.
Wishing you luck x |
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By *elkieWoman 5 weeks ago
Durham |
FOR ME: I play with people who understand I have loose legs and get off on watching me fuck other men, and then I fuck two or more of them at once. The best way of finding such men, IME, is at greedy girls events or swingers events - though I’ve also done well at Euphoria, tbh. |
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I mean you said it yourself. One guy is flaky enough. Getting 2 is double trouble. Add to that you need 2 people who are comfortable with each other & you need to be comfortable as well.
It's gonna be tough. As someone else said, try a club. Although that has its challenges too. |
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By *am882Man 5 weeks ago
Northampton |
"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. "
Just message me and I will make it happen |
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Hi everyone, thanks for your advice and comments. Appreciate it.
Yes my profile is blunt. Yes I have preferences. I'm not to everyone's taste. I just hate answering messages and like to save time.
Yes I've been to clubs often, it has never been a successful time for me at both Leeds clubs. Townhouse was great though. Maybe I need to travel further.
Just to clarify, for anyone interested, I don't have a preference if a guy is bi or straight.
I'd love to find a bisexual buddy to join me at a club or potentially find someone on here to join us.
Let's hope diaries align and I can live life a little... Again, remember I was asking for advice. |
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"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. "
never had pleasure to enjoy just as yourself maybe we could make first for both? Be fun i sure |
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"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. "
Can you not get one of the guys you have met to find another guy? |
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"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango.
Can you not get one of the guys you have met to find another guy?"
I keep trying but they don't seem to want to share, or our diaries clash |
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Definitely go to a club, your be inundated with requests for MFM or more! And you can choose who you like - as long as they also like you of course. But this is the best way of meeting another male to join you
Good luck and be careful. |
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"Definitely go to a club, your be inundated with requests for MFM or more! And you can choose who you like - as long as they also like you of course. But this is the best way of meeting another male to join you
Good luck and be careful. "
I actually was thinking about a club today but I figured it would be quiet due to father's day. |
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Try to find someone who has experience setting, 3 somes, 4 somes, gang bangs etc.
Thay will have a list of guys who can perform, show up and have experience.
Keep away from dreamers, fantasists and half wits.
Been there, done that, never again. We all live and learn.
They may not entertain you if you have no experience yourself, as guys we know have been let down so often.
Alternatively, go to a club and chat to people there.
Good luck, take your time and ask lots of questions about who attends etc
As always, time spent up front is well worth it. |
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It shouldn’t be that difficult to find 2, or more guys to join you for some group fun. I have Fab mates I have teamed up with to give ladies the ‘greedy girl’ experience, it only boils down to genuine people and a venue really…..?
As ever, the Fab Forum mainstay of “just go to a club” has popped up…..  If you want to experience this with complete strangers you know nothing about, in an uncomfortable, non-relaxing environment, a club may suit you well… |
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First find a Man you get on with who will attend a club with you. As a couple in a club it's fairly easy to get a threesome with another Man, if you choose a club night when "single" Men are allowed. |
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"I think a club is a much safer environment than a home or hotel. "
In this last week alone, I have been told of three incidents of men trying it on with unprotected sex in a club, one involving a very prominent events host couple, where the female half was supposed to be looking out for another female who was in a greedy mood. I wouldn’t class that as particularly ‘safe’ at all… |
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"Why do you think it would be safer in a house or hotel where is less supervision ?"
I'm confident no woman would arrange to meet a couple of guys she's not met before, and therefore trusts to not take liberties....? |
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By *elkieWoman 3 weeks ago
Durham |
"Why do you think it would be safer in a house or hotel where is less supervision ?
I'm confident no woman would arrange to meet a couple of guys she's not met before, and therefore trusts to not take liberties....?"
Joke’s on you then, mate. Because sometimes we do. There’s a whole world out there you have no ifea about. And what’s worse is that often the person who takes liberties is a trusted friend, someone we have played with more than once, who “forgets” a limit and does some damage. Or worse, we’ve been groomed. No man worth his salt will ever ask a woman to meet privately if she says she prefers clubs.
What makes clubs safer is not that they guarantee nothing will go wrong. It’s that we’re surrounded by people who will help us recover when it does. That’s why they’re important. |
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"I've got a fuck it list that I really want to tick off before I hit 40.
I've never had a threesome. I'm straight so looking for an MMF threesome.
Everytime I meet a guy that's up for joining me, they either get feelings and say they don't want to share me or they disappear.
Is it really this difficult to organise group sex?
What's the best way to make this happen?
Advice please.
A frustrated Clem Fandango. "
It's a shame you're so far away as this what I look for, although I do travel every now and then. |
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I'm pretty often approached by MM couples who specify that they're straight men who like to do MFMs together. I'd expect those to be your best bet as they're already comfortable with each other and hopefully have actual experience of fucking in the same vicinity so there's less likely to be any self conscious panic about not being as hot/muscled/endowed as the other one or just being put off by there being another penis present. Plenty of guys who say they'd be well up for it but have no experience or don't know the other guy first end up having issues when they're in that situation for the first time.
Good luck OP 💜 |
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