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Help!!! Am I Gay???
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
Near you |
Ok… this probably gets posted a lot. But I’d really like to know your lovely lots opinion on this one.
So, I consider myself straight (oh that classic statement). I fancy women and have always identified as a straight man. Football, pub, rock music etc.
However from the moment I started masturbating as a teen, when super horny I’d sometimes stray to gay porn.
As soon as I finished though… not interested at all. As I got older… on nights out when d*unk I’ve built up the courage to hook up with guys. Just to see if I like it. But the same again… I finish and not interested.
I’ve done this on and off for the last 20+ years.
I can appreciate a good looking man but I don’t fancy them the same way I do woman but as I said when horny… it’s all I want.
Now I’m married but the itch is still there. Has anyone else experienced this and eventually fallen for a man. I mean I’d love it if that did happen. I just kind of feel in limbo of that makes sense?
So… I know we hate to label but I’d love to know what you all think. Am I gay or just a straight guy with a kink. Please be nice 😘😂 |
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
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"Maybe you’re just somewhere in the middle and need to accept it, and then you’d start to feel less weird. Have you tried MMF? Maybe that would be better?"
no never tried that but that’s a great shout. I think I just need to relax maybe. If I start telling people I’ve experienced things with men maybe that will help
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Sounds like you are bisexual. But that has a range on it too. Have you tried having your wife peg you? Might satisfy the urge for anal and see how you feel with it being a woman?
Perhaps you’re struggling with some internalised homophobia.
Or maybe you just have a different preference romantically vs sexually. It’s all a spectrum
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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Sounds like your bi. Does it really matter? There's worse things in the world to be than interested in the same sex. You say the itch has always been there. You might regret not acting on it when it's too late 🤷♀️ |
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You can be sexually attracted to more than one gender. It doesn't make you "gay" to fancy men, you might be bisexual or pansexual if you still have an attraction to other genders. You may not be biromantic, so you might be sexually attracted to men but not interested in them romantically. That's okay. I'm a believer in sexuality being fluid and changing as we evolve and develop as people.
You don't need to label yourself. Especially while you're figuring things out and discovering yourself.
I'd suggest talking to your partner about how you are feeling. |
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
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"Sounds like you are bisexual. But that has a range on it too. Have you tried having your wife peg you? Might satisfy the urge for anal and see how you feel with it being a woman?
Perhaps you’re struggling with some internalised homophobia.
Or maybe you just have a different preference romantically vs sexually. It’s all a spectrum
"
love this thank you. I get that. Maybe it is just a sexual attraction. I think I just wish I could have the romantic side too. I’m top so the pegging wouldn’t be for me unfortunately 😂 |
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
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"You can be sexually attracted to more than one gender. It doesn't make you "gay" to fancy men, you might be bisexual or pansexual if you still have an attraction to other genders. You may not be biromantic, so you might be sexually attracted to men but not interested in them romantically. That's okay. I'm a believer in sexuality being fluid and changing as we evolve and develop as people.
You don't need to label yourself. Especially while you're figuring things out and discovering yourself.
I'd suggest talking to your partner about how you are feeling. "
That’s not the worst idea. Maybe I just need to tell someone. Just always kept it to myself |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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I wouldn't get too hung up on it. It sounds to me like youre probably somewhere on bisexual spectrum rather than gay. Personally I class myself as bi, but really anything more than sex with a man doesn't appeal. I just dont feel the same about men as I do about women. But I accept that as ok and just the way I am. |
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Definitely speak to your wife. She might be open for you to satisfy that sexual urge with men. Maybe she’d even be open for you to explore them romantically to see how you feel dating a man. Or you may have to decide whether your relationship fulfils you enough to stay if she’s not open to either of these. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Ok… this probably gets posted a lot. But I’d really like to know your lovely lots opinion on this one.
So, I consider myself straight (oh that classic statement). I fancy women and have always identified as a straight man. Football, pub, rock music etc.
However from the moment I started masturbating as a teen, when super horny I’d sometimes stray to gay porn.
As soon as I finished though… not interested at all. As I got older… on nights out when d*unk I’ve built up the courage to hook up with guys. Just to see if I like it. But the same again… I finish and not interested.
I’ve done this on and off for the last 20+ years.
I can appreciate a good looking man but I don’t fancy them the same way I do woman but as I said when horny… it’s all I want.
Now I’m married but the itch is still there. Has anyone else experienced this and eventually fallen for a man. I mean I’d love it if that did happen. I just kind of feel in limbo of that makes sense?
So… I know we hate to label but I’d love to know what you all think. Am I gay or just a straight guy with a kink. Please be nice 😘😂"
I wouldn't say bi curious if you done that more than 1 time 😅 but if you're not attracted to men emotionally only sexually then you're bisexual |
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
Near you |
"Ok… this probably gets posted a lot. But I’d really like to know your lovely lots opinion on this one.
So, I consider myself straight (oh that classic statement). I fancy women and have always identified as a straight man. Football, pub, rock music etc.
However from the moment I started masturbating as a teen, when super horny I’d sometimes stray to gay porn.
As soon as I finished though… not interested at all. As I got older… on nights out when d*unk I’ve built up the courage to hook up with guys. Just to see if I like it. But the same again… I finish and not interested.
I’ve done this on and off for the last 20+ years.
I can appreciate a good looking man but I don’t fancy them the same way I do woman but as I said when horny… it’s all I want.
Now I’m married but the itch is still there. Has anyone else experienced this and eventually fallen for a man. I mean I’d love it if that did happen. I just kind of feel in limbo of that makes sense?
So… I know we hate to label but I’d love to know what you all think. Am I gay or just a straight guy with a kink. Please be nice 😘😂
I wouldn't say bi curious if you done that more than 1 time 😅 but if you're not attracted to men emotionally only sexually then you're bisexual "
haha yes it’s definitely more than once. Never sober though 🤷🏻♂️ I mean I play with myself sober 😂 I think I get scared people will find out. Nothing to be ashamed of either. |
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By *agic.MMan 42 weeks ago
Kent/London |
OP I'd say that if you watch football you are GAY, but that's just me being sarcastic... if you want to put a label to your sexuality, you go by the definition of it...if you are a man that has sex only with women, you are heterosexual... if you are a man that has sex only with men, you are homosexual...if you are a man that has sex with both men or women, you are bisexual...and if you are a man that has sex with mostly women but is curious about sex with other men, than you are bi-curious (which is probably the "label" you fall under) and deviating from these and falling somewhere on between or on some spectrum becomes way to complicated to even try to understand it. Either way, your journey is your own and given enough time you will come to understand yourself and who you are 🙏 |
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By *adger22 OP Man 42 weeks ago
Near you |
"Definitely speak to your wife. She might be open for you to satisfy that sexual urge with men. Maybe she’d even be open for you to explore them romantically to see how you feel dating a man. Or you may have to decide whether your relationship fulfils you enough to stay if she’s not open to either of these. "
I think I might. I really think it’ll be a massive weight off my shoulders. Maybe she’ll be into it
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By *enk15Man 42 weeks ago
Evesham |
Oh man, now I gotta break it to my gay mate that he can't watch football down the pub listening to Black Sabbath 😅
It's probably not worth the stress, OP. We aren't all going to fit perfectly into society's boxes.
You like what you like, when you like it. |
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"It’s the feeling in limbo but I hate. It’s like I want to be gay. It’s weird. "
Sexuality is often peculiar, such that you don't potentially like each gender in the same ways. It's fairly common for predominantly straight men to have desire just for cock and to have no interest in the red of a man. Similarly, some men can find others physically attractive but they have no romantic interests in them.
When in fog, or underwater in poor visibility, we try to get to see as well as in usual conditions that we're used to. Trying to clarify something in our very complex personality can be similar, especially when we clearly grasp being straight.
Have you considered that you might not be free of internalised homophobia? Self acceptance may mean you could have less pressure that we then feel.
Perhaps a fuck buddy could be someone you could both have sex with as well as talk and open up to, with him. |
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You're probably just bi, but it's also worth remembering that most people are turned on by the thought of things that they consider "a bit naughty". It's just that what they mean by that phrase is different for everyone.
The fact that you only get turned on by guys when your inhibitions are inhibited does make it a bigger possibility. |
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"Definitely Bi, but honestly who cares, being put in boxes isnt fair or even accurate in most cases these days"
This. 100%.
The whole "I'm this" so I do "this" thing is totally bullshit.
If you find you like something... do it.
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"You can be sexually attracted to more than one gender. It doesn't make you "gay" to fancy men, you might be bisexual or pansexual if you still have an attraction to other genders. You may not be biromantic, so you might be sexually attracted to men but not interested in them romantically. That's okay. I'm a believer in sexuality being fluid and changing as we evolve and develop as people.
You don't need to label yourself. Especially while you're figuring things out and discovering yourself.
I'd suggest talking to your partner about how you are feeling. "
Perfectly put  |
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Why does everyone need a label these days, undiagnosed this and that and I need so many labels and letters it’s no wonder people are confused, just be yourself without the stigma of a label. Some people today don’t know if they’re human or identify as a teapot. |
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Having lived the same way for years, your bi, I prefer to label myself, easier to give an answer if someone asks, but yes your 99% bi, welcome to the club you jus doubled your chances of getting ur willy wet haha now tell everyone you know before that chews you up inside, ask me how I know lol |
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"Ok… this probably gets posted a lot. But I’d really like to know your lovely lots opinion on this one.
So, I consider myself straight (oh that classic statement). I fancy women and have always identified as a straight man. Football, pub, rock music etc.
However from the moment I started masturbating as a teen, when super horny I’d sometimes stray to gay porn.
As soon as I finished though… not interested at all. As I got older… on nights out when d*unk I’ve built up the courage to hook up with guys. Just to see if I like it. But the same again… I finish and not interested.
I’ve done this on and off for the last 20+ years.
I can appreciate a good looking man but I don’t fancy them the same way I do woman but as I said when horny… it’s all I want.
Now I’m married but the itch is still there. Has anyone else experienced this and eventually fallen for a man. I mean I’d love it if that did happen. I just kind of feel in limbo of that makes sense?
So… I know we hate to label but I’d love to know what you all think. Am I gay or just a straight guy with a kink. Please be nice 😘😂"
Labels are for tins but if you are sexually attracted to both men and women, there’s a word for that: bisexual.
It sounds like you form emotional attachments to women while your attraction to men is purely physical and sexual, hence your comment about having no interest once you reach climax.
Although your concluding comment about loving the idea of falling for a man makes me wonder otherwise.
Just do what makes you happy.
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You're a bi guy.I reckon everyone is bi to some extent.Sexuality is a spectrum.Sadly there's still a stigma attached to bi males..usually by other men..Whereas everyone loves a bi female...especially men.
I used to meet a lovely couple and when we played as a 3sum he'd only ever wank me...nothing more.When I'd meet him on my own he couldn't keep his mouth off my cock.
I'm totally bi...some men like a bit of touching and wanking.Some like to take it further...oral ,even anal.Wherever you are on the sexual spectrum...enjoy it.! |
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By *aven3Man 40 weeks ago
Street |
" You're a bi guy.I reckon everyone is bi to some extent.Sexuality is a spectrum.Sadly there's still a stigma attached to bi males..usually by other men..Whereas everyone loves a bi female...especially men.
I used to meet a lovely couple and when we played as a 3sum he'd only ever wank me...nothing more.When I'd meet him on my own he couldn't keep his mouth off my cock.
I'm totally bi...some men like a bit of touching and wanking.Some like to take it further...oral ,even anal.Wherever you are on the sexual spectrum...enjoy it.!"
Like your post.Interesting.I have a T.V friend,who dressed to meet men at clubs.If there are not many women at the club,or men are there,on their own,they go for my friend.If there are more women there,or men are with a female partner,they won't go for my friend.Shame so many relationships still can't be open and accept bi sexuality. |
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By *ay2571Man 40 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
Sexuality is a scale and we are all on it. Very few are extreme one way or the other. Most are simply towards one end.
But like all scales it changes from time to to as you go through phases.
Mine can literally change by the hour  |
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"I dont find me attractive at all, im certainly not romantically attracted to men, but i do like cock, it's all about the physical sensations, there's nothing nicer than a good hard fucking. "
Very well put.
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"Sexuality is a scale and we are all on it. Very few are extreme one way or the other. Most are simply towards one end.
But like all scales it changes from time to to as you go through phases.
Mine can literally change by the hour "
I'm at the extreme end of "having no interest in boobs, vagina or feminine bodies."
Still haven't had a change in that in nearly 44 years.
My autistic brain is very decisive and doesn't like change.  |
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exible x
ha