The last thread got too big it seems.
Well I still slightly have this feeling, but not as much. I think it is just the fact your are fed your whole life the stereotypical lifestyle and image of how life goes. Cuckolding doesn't really fit with that.
There is definitely still the "post nut clarity" that several people have messaged me about. And there are times when i'm cleaning my cum up, as they both still have sex, where I do feel a bit stupid.
But maybe that's also the point and the thrill. Anyway, I appreciate everyone's engagement so just wanted to say thanks. |
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I think "mixed feelings" after sexual encounters of the dynamically-charged, extramarital kind are very common.
I think with these feelings it's important to let them settle before thinking too deeply about them, because a lot of the time it's just that you need a bit of time to "normalise" the experience. Our subconscious mind draws on a lifetime of being taught that such things are "wrong" and can accordingly make us feel badly about what was in fact a good experience. |
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"I'd be careful about normalising something that could ultimately be damaging a relationship, after all once you have cracked an egg you can't put it back into the shell."
Agreed, it's still important to examine the feelings, but it's better to not do it in the moment, to have a little bit of distance and perspective. And to talk about it with one's partner, which goes without saying. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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I’ve often pondered the Richard Burton quote “…the minute you start fiddling around outside the idea of monogamy, nothing truly satisfies…”
He was a notorious shagger, so I suspect he was making an oblique point about the risk of normalisation. In my experience a cuckold encounter (which I’ve only experienced as a bull, many years ago) is exceptionally intense for the couple especially, but also one that I came back to only sparingly to preserve that intensity.
I’ve been very mindful of this in conversations with my wife about exploring the possibility. |
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"I’ve often pondered the Richard Burton quote “…the minute you start fiddling around outside the idea of monogamy, nothing truly satisfies…”
He was a notorious shagger, so I suspect he was making an oblique point about the risk of normalisation. In my experience a cuckold encounter (which I’ve only experienced as a bull, many years ago) is exceptionally intense for the couple especially, but also one that I came back to only sparingly to preserve that intensity.
I’ve been very mindful of this in conversations with my wife about exploring the possibility. "
The thing with Burton is that he was frequently unfaithful.
Personally I think of infidelity as incompatible with normalisation. If the habitually unfaithful thrive on the necessary imbalance that comes with dishonesty, it's in fact undesirable for them to "normalise", because that implies that the new situation becomes at least acceptable if not desirable to all parties - which is not what habitual cheaters want.
Hence why to me, normalisation is achieved both through careful self-examination and through open communication. |
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By (user no longer on site) 39 weeks ago
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Nicely put.
Perhaps normalisation is better described in this case as the re-framing of an activity which could be seen as risky to a relationship, to something which is recognised as counter-cultural but embraced nonetheless in the context of intimacy and trust.
At least that’s how it’s played out in conversations with my wife. |
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Over time we've figured out what we like and what we don't like. I (cuck) need to be part of it in some way to not feel any worry. Sometimes thats pictures and videos, but normally its being there, cleaning up and being teased. When I dont know whats going on, I worry about her safety more than the sexy side of things. I never finish until the other guy has left either, so have never had any post-nut issues. |
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By (user no longer on site) 39 weeks ago
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I've said it before. It's the best thing that happend to us.
Wife was very shy and still is, until I'm there but always reserved ie unil she goes all the way (not done for yearsnow just massage and pussy rubbing bar one guy this year)
all in all - i wish we were younger as we never had the massive help from the internet and meeting were via Gumtree personal ads you paid for and got messages via post - then we meet some people, contacts at a nautirust beach and a few times in Eureak but we only went there weekdays on our days off so mostly men
No regrets other than I just wished we met a lot more guys when Mrs L was a lot younger and had the time which we do now |
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