FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Is it that hard ?
Is it that hard ?
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Assuming you’re looking for single women, if they’re getting 100+ messages a day, many from men who can’t take no for an answer, it’s unsurprising they don’t reply. Disappointing, but not that surprising |
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Most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. They can only know if you are, by viewing our profiles. There are lots of posts on how to sell yourself here. But only if you want to and will invest the effort. Get to socials and clubs to meet in person, starting to sell who you are.
Negativity isn't usually attractive |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing  "
With a profile like yours, I can imagine it would be extremely difficult to get a reply. Personally, I don't think being a member and being verified counts for much. |
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"OP, you've been on here for at least 11 years (as that's how old your only verification is). Have you not learned in that time that nobody owes you a reply, as well as no reply= no, thank you? "
A single meet veri in 2014?! The guy is on a roll! Good on ya mate! 😂 |
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By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
Are you a couple? Your status would suggest that. |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
We only reply to well constructed profiles.
Even if a message is great, if someone puts insufficient info and visuals into their profile it screams lack of effort and we'll likely ignore the message.
As for the 'I'm verified' bit? We look for recent veris. A huge gap since the last one showing tells us a lot. |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
So many red flags in your profile. |
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You have to put the work in
That goes for everything, profile, headline, pics, that also includes the volume of singular messages you send, and the contents within them
Delete your sent box the moment you send a message, you're not left wondering then, a no peeking if they've read it from their profile either
Whatever comes back to you, comes back, see what you can do from there |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing
We only reply to well constructed profiles.
Even if a message is great, if someone puts insufficient info and visuals into their profile it screams lack of effort and we'll likely ignore the message.
As for the 'I'm verified' bit? We look for recent veris. A huge gap since the last one showing tells us a lot. "
This |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
So you think you're entitled to a reply?
Well, surprise, surprise. Most couples avoid entitled single males like the plague. |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
No idea what your first messages are like but I always look at a profile before reading the message so instantly your status (who are we it's a single profile). Lack to f photos and information would be a meh... If your message was okay and you had sent the pic I requested in my profile at least it'd show you may have read it and you'd probably get a reply even if it was no thanks |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
I don't think that's the OP's problem."
nope me neither but mynpost is most probably true |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
I don't think that's the OP's problem. nope me neither but mynpost is most probably true "
It's a convenient excuse a lot of guys use when they don't make the site work for them. |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
I don't think that's the OP's problem. nope me neither but mynpost is most probably true
It's a convenient excuse a lot of guys use when they don't make the site work for them."
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
I don't think that's the OP's problem. nope me neither but mynpost is most probably true
It's a convenient excuse a lot of guys use when they don't make the site work for them."
wjat my quote yeah maybe its a excuse but its true |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point"
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DD |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes. Ah well you will get over it
Mrs DD"
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DD"
ah well you will get over it not in school anymore |
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"You have to put the work in
That goes for everything, profile, headline, pics, that also includes the volume of singular messages you send, and the contents within them
"
THIS !!
This is why 99% of blokes never get anywhere and the other 1% have multiple meets a year. Nothing to do with looking like a male model or having washboard abs or an 8" cock, but the understanding that you need to put a shitload of work in. |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DD"
We do too. Anything that has to be read 3 times before it even begins to make sense is a complete red flag. It speaks volumes! |
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By *andb69Couple 35 weeks ago
leeds |
There's much much more to swinging than sending someone you don't know a message a few lines long and expecting a free fuck in return. Work the scene, go to clubs and meet real people face to face, build a circle of friends who will verify you etc. |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DDah well you will get over it not in school anymore "
You say that like we are the ones loosing out. Our inbox is always full of requests to meet and we play regularly...so who'se the looser here? Not us. |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DD We do too. Anything that has to be read 3 times before it even begins to make sense is a complete red flag. It speaks volumes!"
Exactly. Our view is that if someone can't show they communicate well from the off, then we have no confidence that they will communicate well around consent and boundaries. |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
I don't think that's the OP's problem. nope me neither but mynpost is most probably true
It's a convenient excuse a lot of guys use when they don't make the site work for them.wjat my quote yeah maybe its a excuse but its true "
It's not the way I choose to meet and I know others are the same.
My experience of people who say that only those people meet is one of a few things. One, their profile is awful (crap text, mediocre pictures). Two, they're completely unable to compose a decent first message (respectful, related to the profile, respecting the person's wishes). Three, they only aim at the people in hot pics.
(Sometimes four, their first messages are unhinged!) |
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"If you aint an adonis with a big dick own house etc amd.now wveryone wants a fave pictire when they wont send one themselves no point
As well as everything else everyone has mentioned, we delete messages that have no punctuation and multiple spelling mistakes.
Mrs DDah well you will get over it not in school anymore "
Or they'll not meet people who write poorly. It's their preference 🤷♀️ |
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By *CExeCouple 35 weeks ago
Hong-Kong/Exeter |
OP - Your bio barely says anything and you have 1 photo that shows your tummy....maybe a bit of effort...
Agreed on spelling, punctuation and grammar. Instant turn off when we get a 'wot r u doin 2nite' type message. Given that mobile phones have autocorrect etc, there's no excuse for being all Vicky Pollard in messages. |
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By *il-widgeMan 35 weeks ago
Stone Staffordshire |
"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
Just read this thread before checking out th OP's profile, I was wondering what sort of well written profile would I find.....well the reason you aren't getting much success is starting you in your own profile pal.....zero effort, a one liner and one picture. Standing out isnt being an adonis or hung like a horse, its about making an effort, if you can't be arsed with your profile what would you be like with another person..... |
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By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
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Solution is don’t message ppl. We sent a few, saw how it is and don’t bother now. Literally no point.
The profile is just a lottery ticket now. It’s technically possible for us to be found by someone suitable, however unlikely. I (the male) find the forums amusing so it worth being here just for that. |
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By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
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It's just a numbers game mate, and due to the number of guys to women/couples , the odds are stacked against.
However, you just need to make the best of what you have.
Update your profile, include more detail, put on a number of quality photos, and be honest.
Not everyone will like you, but just give yourself the best chance.
Good luck |
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Hey guys and girls, read your replies and your nice and not so nice advices, I don’t know what an Adonis is and I’m not the biggest D. It just baffles me that it’s that hard to receive a reply. No, my message does not contain slang, I am polite and not entitled as some of you suckers are saying. No offence and thanks for you replies. I have a good sex life outside of fab, FYI. I think some of you here are really entitled to their opinions lol |
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By *il-widgeMan 35 weeks ago
Stone Staffordshire |
"Hey guys and girls, read your replies and your nice and not so nice advices, I don’t know what an Adonis is and I’m not the biggest D. It just baffles me that it’s that hard to receive a reply. No, my message does not contain slang, I am polite and not entitled as some of you suckers are saying. No offence and thanks for you replies. I have a good sex life outside of fab, FYI. I think some of you here are really entitled to their opinions lol"
Hello mate, if you cut aside from the sarcastic comments and read what folk have said you perhaps need to put a bit more effort into what is showing on your profile. The message you send could be great, but then when they look at your profile its like....and....? Upto you what you do, just saying 😉😘 |
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By (user no longer on site) 35 weeks ago
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"Hey guys and girls, read your replies and your nice and not so nice advices, I don’t know what an Adonis is and I’m not the biggest D. It just baffles me that it’s that hard to receive a reply. No, my message does not contain slang, I am polite and not entitled as some of you suckers are saying. No offence and thanks for you replies. I have a good sex life outside of fab, FYI. I think some of you here are really entitled to their opinions lol
Hello mate, if you cut aside from the sarcastic comments and read what folk have said you perhaps need to put a bit more effort into what is showing on your profile. The message you send could be great, but then when they look at your profile its like....and....? Upto you what you do, just saying 😉😘"
Yep, despite the advice being given (which he asked for) he's not changed anything on his profile. Well as long as he's happy with it that's all that matters  |
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"Hey guys and girls, read your replies and your nice and not so nice advices, I don’t know what an Adonis is and I’m not the biggest D. It just baffles me that it’s that hard to receive a reply. No, my message does not contain slang, I am polite and not entitled as some of you suckers are saying. No offence and thanks for you replies. I have a good sex life outside of fab, FYI. I think some of you here are really entitled to their opinions lol"
Well, if it's working for you, have at it I guess. |
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"Honestly how hard is it to get a reply back? I’m young, verified, am a silver member… I read many women are upset with horrible let down, then there’s me with nothing "
Like almost everything in life, it's all about effort and being in the right place at the right time.
From experience, to be in the 1 right place at the right time, you have to be in the wrong place at the wrong time 99 times.
The effort thing, is entirely down to you and a look at your profile, not an awful lot showing.
If you want to put in some effort, get to socials and clubs, use FAB to locate these places but move away from FAB for meets.
Good luck.
Let us know how you get along. |
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You have nothing for anyone to go on op.
You don't tell us what you're into or offering and have one pic from over 2 years ago.
If I get a message, the first thing I do is read the profile. If it's lacking in info, I delete the message without reading it.
I know you said you had info before, but without knowing what that was, it's hard to say why you didn't get replies. |
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every time you come on.