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Sex with disabled people
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By (user no longer on site) OP 28 weeks ago
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Hello swinger
I have noticed that my disability has put a lot of women off from coming to meet with me, I have a dick that would stretch any vigina.
So I’ve want people to come on this conversation to discuss there fears of having sex with a disabled person, please ask questions and don’t hold back and I’ll do my best to explain.
We all had the same sexual feelings, but we didn’t same opportunities.
Please discuss   |
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I can sympathise with this as i fall jnto the category of being girthy and what would be seen as a passionate lover but i have a disability and people immediately write me despite everything being functional |
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Disability has never been an issue for me. Two of my previous gf were disabled. One who had lost her left arm and another with CP. Both were absolutely gorgeous and beautiful in everyway.
It’s often the traits that abled and disabled share that are the deal breaker. |
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By *loydyMan 28 weeks ago
British |
"Hello swinger
I have noticed that my disability has put a lot of women off from coming to meet with me, I have a dick that would stretch any vigina.
So I’ve want people to come on this conversation to discuss there fears of having sex with a disabled person, please ask questions and don’t hold back and I’ll do my best to explain.
We all had the same sexual feelings, but we didn’t same opportunities.
Please discuss "
obviously it depends on the disablement |
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As above, it depends on the disability. You're not making it very clear on your profile what sort of disability it is, all you're talking about is how thick your dick is. Maybe that is off-putting to people rather than the fact you've got a disability? A physical disability would be a challenge for me, the kind when the man can only have penetrative sex with the woman on top of him as I have a limited mobility in my hips. Otherwise the disability wouldn't matter to me as long as I connected with the person. |
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By *oobaaMan 28 weeks ago
Sth Tyne |
I have no fear of having sex with a disabled person,male or female or vigina..whatever that is.
The fear I have is when a male bangs on about how big and great his cock is..any potential meet ends there for me. |
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"Stop referring to women as 'vaginas' "
This, women are people..
My other half is classed as disabled, so I don't have a fear of it.
He's been turned down by others because he's upfront about it. Made me laugh that one couple he chatted to, said no thanks when they found he uses a stick to walk & they're always banging on about time wasters!.
Maybe elaborate if you're comfortable to and don't just talk about yourself in terms of having a dick,its not really appealing op.
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By *olo_89Couple 28 weeks ago
Kettering |
"Hello swinger
I have noticed that my disability has put a lot of women off from coming to meet with me, I have a dick that would stretch any vigina.
So I’ve want people to come on this conversation to discuss there fears of having sex with a disabled person, please ask questions and don’t hold back and I’ll do my best to explain.
We all had the same sexual feelings, but we didn’t same opportunities.
Please discuss "
I'm not sure its your disability, I think its more just you. You whole attitude is off putting and your whole personality seems to be your dick. |
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Single men often think it's a specific point about them, whatever it is, that stops them getting meetings. But the vast majority of all of us are only mutually compatible with a very tiny minority of other people. This will include attraction as well as interests, preferences, availability of accommodations and much more. Don't assume that your disability is the deciding factor. Many disabled are frequent club goers, which gives others the chance to get to know each other.  |
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"Hello swinger
I have noticed that my disability has put a lot of women off from coming to meet with me, I have a dick that would stretch any vigina.
Please discuss "
Is it bigger than a baby’s head? If the answer is no, it’s not going to stretch it. 
I suspect this is a post to drive traffic to your profile. As others have said the disability is unknown, and I suspect many won’t ask so that they don’t cause offence if it’s not for them.
Maybe being explicit about it will allow people to self select as to whether it’s something they are okay with.
Equally more personality less (not that girthy) dick talk might also help? Most women want to engage with people first and foremost. Dicks are dicks, many want to make sure it’s not attached to one. |
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"Maybe clubs hotel sauna etc should have more understanding of this most places have the play rooms upstairs "
Very good idea and the OP’s personality can come through and make a connection. The disability may no be an issue in the flesh. Text and profiles can be tough. Especially for single guys where we know the numbers are dramatic skewed. |
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I have a disability too, I was born with kidney failure which was picked up on my mums scan before I was born, my old paediatric consultant kept that very photo to help teach medical students . Ive undergone a huge list of major operations including the removal of both my old kidneys due to the reflux from the bladder which caused large amounts of kidney infections , I had a kidney transplant in April 2009 & still going strong , its just over 16 years since I had it done . I never knew who my donor was but all I was told is that he was similar age to myself & was in a motorbike accident , I wrote a letter to the family , which I got a response which said “ where ever I go a part of him will always go with me “ which was so touching . |
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By (user no longer on site) 28 weeks ago
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I genuinely don’t even know where to start with this profile. Firstly, as someone who works in the caring profession, the way you’ve worded around asking the carers to help, I should effin hope not! We’re at work, I should hope that’s a lapse in wording rather than feeling because that was disgusting.
I can see from your status you have no re written your profile, you’re basically asking for a woman to “care for you sexually” as in wanting favours.
I’d suggest, deleting the profile text completely and starting again, actually wanting to meet people rather than “needing to” would likely be a good start, it sounds like you don’t actually want to put the effort in.
Now, as someone who has worked with people with all forms of disabilities for many years, It wouldn’t put me off meeting anyone, but your attitude would.
C |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 28 weeks ago
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All comments gratefully received and the error of my ways has been noted, one comment has made me think is this right for me. At this point in life I don’t think it is, so in 24 hours after posting this my account will be deleted,
Thank you all for your compassion |
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Way back in the dim and distant when I was a single guy. Long before FAB.
From one of my Loot ads (remember them?) I was approached by a couple who wanted to meet in a motorway services hotel. I had a few phone conversations with the hubby but not once did he mention any disability.
On the actual day I thought it a bit strange that he gave me the room number and told me to go straight there. We'd never met and I expected to at least meet for a coffee beforehand. But I did as I was instructed, knocked on the door and was invited in.
His Mrs was lying on the bed in her underwear and I thought she was quite attractive and it didn't take long (with hubby's encouragement) to get down to business.
She was pretty insatiable and with a couple of drink breaks I fucked her 3 times (I was a lot younger and fitter in those days)
The only other strange thing was that she wouldn't change positions. It was missionary only.
It was only when she got off the bed to go to the bathroom that I realised why. She had a deformed spine and walked with a quite severe limp. In all the time I'd been fucking her I really hadn't noticed. Maybe I was just too focused on her gorgeous tits and lovely shaved pussy.
Long and short of it. I thoroughly enjoyed the meet and would have gone back in a flash if given the chance.
So folks don't be too put off by disability. It really can be a rewarding experience.
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A slight tangent and I'm not wishing to derail the thread but the clubs I've visited haven't appeared to be especially disabled friendly (to wheelchair users). Lots of steps, narrow doors etc, as commercial establishments wondering how they get away with not making access for wheelchair users. |
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"A slight tangent and I'm not wishing to derail the thread but the clubs I've visited haven't appeared to be especially disabled friendly (to wheelchair users). Lots of steps, narrow doors etc, as commercial establishments wondering how they get away with not making access for wheelchair users."
The legal requirement is only to make reasonable adjustments. So they don't have to install a lift if the building doesn't have one, but having a ramp so that a wheelchair could get up a front step probably would be required.
But the biggest problem is that enforcement generally relies on the disabled person to make some sort of public complaint. And there aren't many people who'd be happy to do that.
It's a bit like most club's pricing policies are probably illegal under equalities law. |
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A year and a half ago I had a stroke.
My right arm is paralysed and my right leg has a degree of mobility . I can’t drive anymore.
I am coming to terms with my disability but it has been a long hard road !
My wife , since before my stroke, no longer has any sex drive and I have !
All my pictures are taken before my stroke.
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I must admit, one of the things that surprised me when I started attending clubs, is how many disabled people are on the kink and swinging scene.
I don't know why I was surprised, disabled people have sexual needs too.
I'm sorry to admit that it's hard for me to be sexually attracted to someone that I feel that I need to 'take care of'. My compassion and concern overrides my sexual attraction.
I think that probably makes me "ableist". But I'm sorry I can't help it.
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"I must admit, one of the things that surprised me when I started attending clubs, is how many disabled people are on the kink and swinging scene.
I don't know why I was surprised, disabled people have sexual needs too.
I'm sorry to admit that it's hard for me to be sexually attracted to someone that I feel that I need to 'take care of'. My compassion and concern overrides my sexual attraction.
I think that probably makes me "ableist". But I'm sorry I can't help it.
"
No, I do agree.
I think what's worse is people have to apologise for saying what they think |
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By (user no longer on site) 28 weeks ago
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I think the point of this thread was just an opportunity for the OP to come on and tell everyone he has a dick, with the front of disability. He did not get the reaction he wanted, got hand-grenaded and then stated he was pulling the plug on his profile (still here by the way). I had the pleasure of meeting with a lady with MS, she was an absolute joy and never let it get on the way of a brilliant session. I have a disability myself, it is a condition, not an excuse. |
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We all have likes and dislikes, things we say yes or no too.
There isn't anything wrong with that.
I would just say (respectfully) though that just because someone is disabled doesn't mean they are looking for someone to look after them.
Many disabled people already have a carer and are looking for a relationship, same as anyone else.
Other disabled people live life in a way that is adapted to their needs, and are fully independent no carer required.
Like anything else there is a spectrum  |
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By (user no longer on site) 28 weeks ago
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I have a spinal injury and not had intercourse for over 33 yrs as my injury prevents any feeling or function below my waist
Other than that aspect I am very very strong in my upper body doing training each week with my PT and love life to the full driving and socialising
I have met a few off here and had lovely feed back but is so difficult for people to see beyond the disabilities and see me as me the person with skills and personal traits unique to me Please feel free to contact and ask me anthing at all |
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Most people on the scene are very superficial so they worry about optics and what people say/think far too much.
The example of the man getting rejected bc of his walking stick is funny (sorry for laughing) but typical of the stories ive heard. One guy i know gets the same treatment for his lazy eye. Even though he's a good looking bloke.
Fabs is already messy enough but I couldn't imagine approaching people on here with a disability. People generally are so shallow. Must be a nerve racking experience.
Disability comes in many forms of course and many of us already had a relationship with someone who has. I've never dated anyone with a noticeable physical one and not that I'm trying to avoid such people.
Only met one gorgeous gal few years ago. After chatting for some time it was clear that she didn't want to meet for fear of rejection and her perceived compatibility issues. I had to respect her wishes. |
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"I would just say (respectfully) though that just because someone is disabled doesn't mean they are looking for someone to look after them.
"
To be fair to _smadasitgets, she didn't say that disabled people are looking for someone to look after them - what she said is that she can't help feeling that she should be looking after them. And I think that's a common issue - most of us don't have much experience interacting with disabled people, so it's not surprising that people don't know how they're meant to behave.
And especially in the modern climate where getting it wrong, however well intentioned, can lead to you being condemned.
On top of that, people tend to be most comfortable with the people that they feel that they have most in common with. Of course they may have loads in common with a disabled person, but they just don't realise.
And then swinging tends to be a pretty superficial activity - not many of us are looking to develop a deep understanding of the people we have sex with.
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I agree she didn't say that, I hope my words are taken in the spirit they are intended, which was to be educational rather than condemning 
Maybe if someone hasn't much experience with disabled people, my words serve as a new perspective for them to consider. |
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If an opening message from a guy said, 'I have a dick that could stretch any vigina!' He'd be going on the block list wether he was disabled, able bodied, black, white or a dead ringer for Aquaman  |
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"We all have likes and dislikes, things we say yes or no too.
There isn't anything wrong with that.
I would just say (respectfully) though that just because someone is disabled doesn't mean they are looking for someone to look after them.
Many disabled people already have a carer and are looking for a relationship, same as anyone else.
Other disabled people live life in a way that is adapted to their needs, and are fully independent no carer required.
Like anything else there is a spectrum "
Absolutly!! Not looking for to be cared for looking for actual human connection.
I have a few conditions which are disabling.
I'm open about it in chats and 'hint' at it in my profile. While expressing the type of scenarios I could manage with my disabilities
For the most part on here I get told I'm 'draining the tax system', asked if I'm 'part of the anxiety club' or in response to be trying to slow a chats desired speed down. From checking of similar likes and dislikes and arranging a meet to actually taking the time to get to know someone abit like a friend would I'm essentially repeatedly told 'why are you even on fab' despite me for warning those who are clearly looking for swift brief interactions that I would be a waste of their time, they placate 'let's chat then' and rarely last more than a few more messages before they are essentially telling me I am not suitable for the site. |
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Personally adding I'm disabled to my profile hasn't put anyone off that I've noticed
Anyone can become disabled at any time and most people know this so don't have an issue with it. And disabilities come in all shapes and sizes.
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