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How to get started in this lifestyle?
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Hiya we’re new to this lifestyle and looking to chat to other couples and women as to how you went about getting started ? Female would really like to chat to others more to find out about things and get our confidence up more !!! Looking forwards to hearing from you all xx |
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Get to organised group socials would be the main advice. No expectation of play and just lots of swingers chatting. Everyone is friendly and you'll love the experience.
You could also visit a club and just stick to the social areas. No one will expect you to play and you can get a sense of what goes on. |
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Hi op and welcome.
Here's my advice, I'm half a couple.
If you want to attract ladies and couples, you need pics of both people really. Bi ladies are massively in demand here and need to be attracted to 2 people, if they can't see the man, chances are they'll pass you by.
Also maybe add a bit in your text about who you are, what you look for and offer any meets.
Again, with no info people will likely swerve your profile for one that's more informative.
Do a search for couples on here and have a look at their profiles for some ideas.
Failing that, try a club or as Sally said above, a ladies night, if it's for the lady to meet other women alone. |
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"Hiya we’re new to this lifestyle and looking to chat to other couples and women as to how you went about getting started ? Female would really like to chat to others more to find out about things and get our confidence up more !!! Looking forwards to hearing from you all xx"
Organised group socials are a great way of meeting people with no expectations. It’s a great way to get to know people and make friends xx 😘 |
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By *aandLoCouple 8 weeks ago
Southampton |
Going to concur with what's been said: you need more on the profile for members to get a feel for who you are.
We're not really looking for couples at the moment but when that's been our dynamic I would skip by a profile with no photos of the guy - or where there's only a dick pic.
If he's part of the play he needs to be part of the profile. |
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We are a Hotwife couple so looking for single guys but if we were looking for a couple like others have said we would want to see pics of you both. Also you definitely need more on your profile, tell people about yourself and what you are looking for.
Get to clubs too, it can be daunting going for the first time but they are friendly places. We started going on nights when there were no events so it was quiet then started going to events once we were more comfortable. |
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I think for us the physical world of swinging works far better than trying to do this online. Just getting out there in the real world meeting real people. From the start pretty much all or experiences and friendships we've made have been from going to club, parties or just naughty people we've met out in the vanilla world. Personally for us you just can beet you getting out there and stuck in.
I think if we'd started online only we would have found it difficult to get started and find our people. But out in the real you get to meet lots of people (sort of speed dating) and you pretty much know from the start who's going to work for you and who's not. And you get to do it on yours terms without having to match arrangements with other people. |
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Get your self to a club or a social, some clubs even have newbie nights and the staff show you around and introduce you to people, that really helped us when we first went and we were so nervous ( me more so ). If anyone on here is decent and worth your time they will understand you are new in your journey and help you through it and not be pushy or demanding. We happy to answer any other questions you may have  |
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Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group. |
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"Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group."
That’s a brilliant idea.
You should definitely do this.
What could possibly be wrong about it?
I mean, you’re actually doing g her a favour if you think about it.
Expanding her mind and all that. |
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"Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group.
That’s a brilliant idea.
You should definitely do this.
What could possibly be wrong about it?
I mean, you’re actually doing g her a favour if you think about it.
Expanding her mind and all that. "
🤣
My thoughts exactly! 🤦🏼♀️
F x |
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"Hiya we’re new to this lifestyle and looking to chat to other couples and women as to how you went about getting started ? Female would really like to chat to others more to find out about things and get our confidence up more !!! Looking forwards to hearing from you all xx"
You've been given some solid advice on here so far. Social events are a fantastic way to meet people and the vibe is always really relaxed with no pressure.
We'd highly recommend getting more pictures of yourselves on your profile, not just close-ups and if the male half is involved he needs to be visible too. We can recommend good editing apps for blurring faces or identifying features like tattoos (if you're worried about being recognised).
Feel free to send us a message!
F x |
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"Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group."
What a brilliantly thought out plan.
Your wife has no interest in swinging so you'll secretly place her on some form of chat group.
Sounds like a well thought out, considerate course of action.
Let us all know how you get on.
Maybe shop around for a decent divorce lawyer while you're at it. |
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By *sm265Woman 7 weeks ago
Perthshire |
Agree with all the advice already given.
Even in scenarios where I would be playing with only the woman, and the man would purely be a spectator, I would still expect there to be pictures of both of them on the profile. |
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"Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group."
Please don't do this. It's pressuring her when she's clearly given you her answer. |
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By *aandLoCouple 7 weeks ago
Southampton |
"Hello everyone,
During an intimate moment with my wife, I broached the subject of visiting clubs. She firmly rejected the idea, questioning why individuals would engage in sexual activities in public, as she views it as something taboo. I suggested that it could be enjoyable and liberating, but her response remained a resounding NO.
In any case, I am curious if there are any chat groups or WhatsApp groups exclusively for women, where they can freely converse and discuss various topics. I might consider discreetly adding my wife to such a group.
Please don't do this. It's pressuring her when she's clearly given you her answer. "
I'd go so far as to say it's verging on bullying! Definitely duplicitous which is the opposite to the openness and trust essential to couples on the scene. |
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We started by doing a watch only meet. It made me feel at ease because nothing was expected.
I did end up giving him a bj but it was me that suggested it, not him.
It took the pressure off our first meet as a couple and eased us into going further.
Katie |
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"Hiya we’re new to this lifestyle and looking to chat to other couples and women as to how you went about getting started ? Female would really like to chat to others more to find out about things and get our confidence up more !!! Looking forwards to hearing from you all xx"
We started with clubs. Which may have been a bad start. Not that they weren’t enjoyable but we just haven’t got anywhere in part because we are both socially awkward. So our next plan is to attend some more social events get to know people who also visit the clubs we do, outside of that environment |
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