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first time swinging
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally with a meet we just like to see where things go and not have the pressure of having to swap, just see where things lead instead of deciding before the meet
We've been swinging 16 months now and with private meets i still get really nervous before hand, I don't think that will ever go away
That's why we like clubs because you can go and there's not any expectations and you can relax and enjoy yourself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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we had our first experience saturday night at infusions blackpool. played together in the blackout room. another couple came in and joined us. fun was had but we do not know who with. it made things easier. |
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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago
Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you) |
We did our first time in a club too....started with each other and it just kinda happened....another couple climbed on the big bed and started to touch us and it was easy....very horny...a bit scary but so much fun - just relax and go at your own pace and it will happen....  |
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OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need. |
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By *enninemarkMan
over a year ago
huddersfield/manchester |
I would say you both need to agree limits..what you are happy each other doing...also a way if stopping if either of you are unhappy once it starts. Its more than porn as it is real and involves the person you love. But I guess that is what makes it so much hornier than porn!
Have fun! |
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By *enithWoman
over a year ago
closer than you think |
"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need."
Very good advice |
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By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago
Sunderland |
Find the right people.
For sure, you're going to want to do that on every meet, but for your first time, don't jump in too quick with just anyone, but find the right people, who will recognise where you are at, and make it easy for you.
That makes a world of difference, and your first meet can be relaxed and open. And if something happens, it happens, if it doesn't, well maybe next time. I'm a big fan of seeing how it goes and going with the flow, rather than planning this must happen or that must happen.
Oh and yeah, if you drink, go easy. Couple of looseners fine, but very very easy to have too much and that's not a great idea.
Good luck
D. |
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By *enninemarkMan
over a year ago
huddersfield/manchester |
"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need.
Very good advice"
I agree. Also difficult to sepearate nerves and excitement. I find every meet or club visit a very heady experience! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need."
I'm.curious as to why they would sit on different sofas or sit apart ? x |
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Separate sofas are needed for the 'leap of faith' where the bravest person strips and leaps from one sofa to the other. If there's only one sofa, one can only do the 'solo bounce' which is funny but not as dramatic. Definately 2 sofas..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think having nerves adds to the excitement of the whole experience. If we lost the nervous feeling i think we would stop playing as we feel it would then become routine and no longer enjoyable.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Were reasonably new to swinging as a couple (shel used to a single on the scene) and nerves are a normal part, if anything they increase the excitement.
I echo the above it's important you talk through your expectations, wants, desires and worries before you meet people go to a club. It's also important to debrief after each meet so you both ensure that you were both 100% happy with everything that has gone on.
I'm concerned what your saying about people saying it will split you up, if you are not a solid couple you shouldn't embark on the journey, if you are a solid couple and you communicate it won't split you up and if anything will bring you closer together. We are stronger than ever and talk all worries through together and our sex life away from swinging is amazing. |
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"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need.
I'm.curious as to why they would sit on different sofas or sit apart ? x"
This was advice we were given as new swingers. Sit apart and split the couples. M from couple a sits with f from couple b and vice versa. Allows those flirty little touches and acts as an ice breaker. Also its a way of breaking that 1st nerves. If you sit together you have a habit of clinging to each other and making those nerves worse. Sitting apart means you can chat with the other couple as individuals. Works surprisingly well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Find the right people.
For sure, you're going to want to do that on every meet, but for your first time, don't jump in too quick with just anyone, but find the right people, who will recognise where you are at, and make it easy for you.
That makes a world of difference, and your first meet can be relaxed and open. And if something happens, it happens, if it doesn't, well maybe next time. I'm a big fan of seeing how it goes and going with the flow, rather than planning this must happen or that must happen.
Oh and yeah, if you drink, go easy. Couple of looseners fine, but very very easy to have too much and that's not a great idea.
Good luck
D."
That's the best advice but just both be confident that you are doing it for fun together and things will be fine !
Hope so still waiting for our first time lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need.
I'm.curious as to why they would sit on different sofas or sit apart ? x
This was advice we were given as new swingers. Sit apart and split the couples. M from couple a sits with f from couple b and vice versa. Allows those flirty little touches and acts as an ice breaker. Also its a way of breaking that 1st nerves. If you sit together you have a habit of clinging to each other and making those nerves worse. Sitting apart means you can chat with the other couple as individuals. Works surprisingly well."
See that is my idea of hell. As I like to stay close to Lee till we play... I have to start playing with Lee then swap after some play has happened but I also like to see how a couple plays together first.
And I've been doing this a while and still freakif I have to sit with someone else's guy x |
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"OK practical advice. Talk talk talk before after and during if need be. Be prepared to stop if either of you need to.
Know your limits and don't cross them.
Don't drink a lot dutch courage to far is lack of consent.
Sit apart but close if there is 2 couches sit on different 1s.
Enjoy the experience.
Let the other couple know its your 1st time and that you are nervous.
Be prepared, don't rely on others for condoms lube or anything else you need.
I'm.curious as to why they would sit on different sofas or sit apart ? x
This was advice we were given as new swingers. Sit apart and split the couples. M from couple a sits with f from couple b and vice versa. Allows those flirty little touches and acts as an ice breaker. Also its a way of breaking that 1st nerves. If you sit together you have a habit of clinging to each other and making those nerves worse. Sitting apart means you can chat with the other couple as individuals. Works surprisingly well.
See that is my idea of hell. As I like to stay close to Lee till we play... I have to start playing with Lee then swap after some play has happened but I also like to see how a couple plays together first.
And I've been doing this a while and still freakif I have to sit with someone else's guy x"
And this shows how people are very different. 
I can only offer advice that worked well for us. Hope it goes well for you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It does as long as I start with my own partner.. and then it just seems to all flow.. and we swap.. but had I tried that at the start I would never have got past the starting point.
As I dont want to start with someone elses partner. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How to deal with being nervous with your first swap  "
A lot are nervous even on the 10th time or more just arrange a meet with no definite plan to play and go with the flow ie a social meet with potential and if it feels right go for it of not you can just leave it as a social one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How to deal with being nervous with your first swap
We have been meeting on and off for ten years,
We still get pre meet nerves."
us too- we kinda like it though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To me it's like watching porn .but it really is up to my wife to set the pace"
only go as fast as the slowest - nobody will feel out of their depth then |
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