FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Am I a hideous abomination?
Am I a hideous abomination?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I know this is going to come across as the standard "I'm a single male and can't get meets" forum post, but I'd really appreciate some tips. I'd like to think I was a respectful, genuine kind of guy, yet whenever it gets to the exchanging picture stage, I never get a reply. Like, poof, gone never to be heard from again. I don't think I look like I've been kicked in the face by a horse, but maybe I'm wrong! Any tips out there for me? X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I totally get that, although due to my job I need to be discreet. I have private face pics I'm not shy on sharing however! "
Must be an English teacher as he used the correct discreet rather than "discrete". Its a fair cop mate come on then, let's see your mug!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can't answer your question for the obvious reason and unless you show people you'll get a dozen similar answers.
Your profile tells people nothing either so you need to re-visit that and put a bit more thought into it.
Effort in = Rewards out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No offence to the o p but far too many use the its my job that means no pics.
I have face pics I only show when there is realistic chance of meet but in this case he is asking for feedback this is not blind date. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I totally get that, although due to my job I need to be discreet. I have private face pics I'm not shy on sharing however!
Must be an English teacher as he used the correct discreet rather than "discrete". Its a fair cop mate come on then, let's see your mug!! "
Science, actually! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest?  "
The more suggestions you entertain, the less YOUR profile reflects YOU.
Some things you have to work out for yourself. Only you can 'sell' yourself to the people you wish to attract. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest?
The more suggestions you entertain, the less YOUR profile reflects YOU.
Some things you have to work out for yourself. Only you can 'sell' yourself to the people you wish to attract."
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a template of what to fill my profile with by any means. And "selling" myself makes it seem far too much like a transaction for me haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest?
The more suggestions you entertain, the less YOUR profile reflects YOU.
Some things you have to work out for yourself. Only you can 'sell' yourself to the people you wish to attract.
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a template of what to fill my profile with by any means. And "selling" myself makes it seem far too much like a transaction for me haha"
It was a metaphor.
Think of your profile as your shop window to display your 'goods'
The women/couples of fab are your 'customers'
Whilst we're not saying you literally sell yourself. The principles of it are the same. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest?
The more suggestions you entertain, the less YOUR profile reflects YOU.
Some things you have to work out for yourself. Only you can 'sell' yourself to the people you wish to attract.
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a template of what to fill my profile with by any means. And "selling" myself makes it seem far too much like a transaction for me hahaIt was a metaphor.
Think of your profile as your shop window to display your 'goods'
The women/couples of fab are your 'customers'
Whilst we're not saying you literally sell yourself. The principles of it are the same."
lets that that shop window analogy a bit further.....
one shop window is dull and drab!
the other shop window is bright and sparkly....
which is more likely to grab peoples attention.......
maybe the true answer for you is to go away, sit down with a pen and a pad... and actually think about what you want to say about you.. and what you want to get across.....
who knows you better than you!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest?
The more suggestions you entertain, the less YOUR profile reflects YOU.
Some things you have to work out for yourself. Only you can 'sell' yourself to the people you wish to attract.
Please don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a template of what to fill my profile with by any means. And "selling" myself makes it seem far too much like a transaction for me hahaIt was a metaphor.
Think of your profile as your shop window to display your 'goods'
The women/couples of fab are your 'customers'
Whilst we're not saying you literally sell yourself. The principles of it are the same.
lets that that shop window analogy a bit further.....
one shop window is dull and drab!
the other shop window is bright and sparkly....
which is more likely to grab peoples attention.......
maybe the true answer for you is to go away, sit down with a pen and a pad... and actually think about what you want to say about you.. and what you want to get across.....
who knows you better than you!!!!"
This is great advice and something I'll definately do! Thanks! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I totally get that, although due to my job I need to be discreet. I have private face pics I'm not shy on sharing however!
Must be an English teacher as he used the correct discreet rather than "discrete". Its a fair cop mate come on then, let's see your mug!! "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Appreciate all the tips guys. I'll consider putting my face pic as public for sure, and I'll revisit my profile. Anything else to suggest? "
Have you tried sending someone else's face pic when asked to send one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Delete the first couple of paragraphs.
You sound like a loon  "
This. And add some better photos and some capital letters (upper case) at the beginning of your sentences. A lazy sloppily written profile just equals a lazy sloppy lover to a lot of people.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No offence to the o p but far too many use the its my job that means no pics."
I don't really see this as a valid excuse, for the very simple reason that anyone who see's your pictures are on here too - so if they out you, they out themselves.
There is a setting somewhere (I forget exactly where) that restricts access to pics strictly to fab users. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Back to your original question OP, I would say (and this is of course without knowing what you look like) that, more than likely, it is your profile that may be the root of your lack of success.
There's not much there that tells anyone anything about you.
There are loads of similar threads by single guys asking for profile advice and why they're not getting anywhere. I would suggest you search the forum and see what advice has been given to others and see if you can apply any of it yourself.
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By *4nc3rCouple
over a year ago
Clacton-On-Sea, Essex |
"No offence to the o p but far too many use the its my job that means no pics.
I don't really see this as a valid excuse, for the very simple reason that anyone who see's your pictures are on here too - so if they out you, they out themselves.
There is a setting somewhere (I forget exactly where) that restricts access to pics strictly to fab users."
I'll grab my popcorn in anticipation for the can of worms you just opened
Unless you're a celebrity or high profile management, get over it!
Believe it or not, not everyone on fab is on the dole.
Most of us have jobs! lol
Face is THE most important feature on a guy imho if that part isn't right for me then that's as far as it goes - therefore if there is no face picture there is no conversation... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No offence to the o p but far too many use the its my job that means no pics.
I don't really see this as a valid excuse, for the very simple reason that anyone who see's your pictures are on here too - so if they out you, they out themselves.
There is a setting somewhere (I forget exactly where) that restricts access to pics strictly to fab users.
I'll grab my popcorn in anticipation for the can of worms you just opened
Unless you're a celebrity or high profile management, get over it!
Believe it or not, not everyone on fab is on the dole.
Most of us have jobs! lol
Face is THE most important feature on a guy imho if that part isn't right for me then that's as far as it goes - therefore if there is no face picture there is no conversation..."
This!!
Jesus why is it so hard for guys to get the fact that we are not attracted to cocks, merely FACES!
Someone can spend time writing a lovely worded message but in the midst of many inbox messages, I am only looking for an attractive face. I'll delete immediately any that haven't attached pics. |
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"No offence to the o p but far too many use the its my job that means no pics.
I don't really see this as a valid excuse, for the very simple reason that anyone who see's your pictures are on here too - so if they out you, they out themselves.
There is a setting somewhere (I forget exactly where) that restricts access to pics strictly to fab users.
I'll grab my popcorn in anticipation for the can of worms you just opened
Unless you're a celebrity or high profile management, get over it!
Believe it or not, not everyone on fab is on the dole.
Most of us have jobs! lol
Face is THE most important feature on a guy imho if that part isn't right for me then that's as far as it goes - therefore if there is no face picture there is no conversation..."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ok so my advice.
Your profile reads as "I'm trying to be everything to everyone"
You're into most things? I can bet you're not or you're greatly limited in your imagination.
Be specific about what you like, and what your after.
Your gonna think "oh but if I'm specific I'm ruling people put an I won't get meets" but trust me specific = the folk who are right for you will find you. Generic = you disappear into the huge crowd of everything to everyone's.
People aren't going to message you to ask if your into xyz they're just gonna look for someone who says they're I to it.
Say a bit about yourself and add some good ice breakers people can use to write a message.
One tip is read your profile right now and try to write yourself an interesting first message.
Bet you find it hard to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has anyone got any tips/opinions to help my profile out? Do I have a head like a melted wellie? "
First sentence is pointlessly negative the rest is uninformative.
Would you message you? |
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By *at69driveMan
over a year ago
Wisbech and A47 corridor |
"I know this is going to come across as the standard "I'm a single male and can't get meets" forum post, but I'd really appreciate some tips. I'd like to think I was a respectful, genuine kind of guy, yet whenever it gets to the exchanging picture stage, I never get a reply. Like, poof, gone never to be heard from again. I don't think I look like I've been kicked in the face by a horse, but maybe I'm wrong! Any tips out there for me? X"
. Your profile is what sells you. If you are selling a house ,you would not just state " house for sale " you add pictures and a full description of the property .You will need. a detailed well written profile with hobbies and interests plus full body oicpictures . Currently all we know is that you are male with little other info
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To be brutally honest some of us here would love to tell you what's REALLY wrong but we're far too polite; I include myself in this and wouldn't dare tell you what's wrong. And it's nothing to do with not having a face pic on display - far from it. Others might agree but not say so; but we know what we're thinking. Also, I do not believe for a second that you don't have a facepic cos of your job; that's far too lame a reason and YOU know that  |
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