"Shyness? Do you like it? Or does it put you off?
I am guessing most swinging couples prefer the people they meet to be very outgoing.
... though they do say 'the quiet ones are the worst' "
I've met lots of shy people. If you have the ability to put them at their ease - it's not a problem. It's quite an endearing quality actually... |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
Being more upfront and proactive is something I'm trying to do in a group meet or club situation. It doesn't come naturally; and I think the fact I'm quite shy is a bit of a hindrance in the whole swinging realm. Luckily I have wingmen and wingwomen who know me and are gracious at prodding me out of my shell when necessary. |
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"Doesn't bother me, I tend to be good with shy people, make them feel at ease.
I was painfully shy myself once and it feels crap."
 I totally agree with that last statement. I was very shy as a child and it does feel like crap.
I'd have no problem meeting someone who was a little shy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doesn't bother me, I tend to be good with shy people, make them feel at ease.
I was painfully shy myself once and it feels crap.
How did you stop being shy?"
Fake not being shy until it feels natural. I used to be shy as well.
I realised there was no need to be shy and that people who didn't know you wouldn't know you were shy either.
I like shy and calm guys myself, i'm still fairly introverted and someone loud, extrovert, or hyper would probably annoy me. |
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"Doesn't bother me, I tend to be good with shy people, make them feel at ease.
I was painfully shy myself once and it feels crap.
How did you stop being shy?"
A longish story but I can PM you if you like? |
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By *GHertsCouple
over a year ago
North Herts |
As it says in our profile we're both quite shy really and take some prising out of our shells, which doesn't help when most of our meets so far have been in club environments where shyness can be a limiting factor. So we're always grateful when someone comes along that makes that opening gambit.
Guess we need to learn to be a little braver and realise that the worst that can happen is someone will say a polite thanks but no thanks.
Mr G |
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By *ewels74Woman
over a year ago
Dundee/Angus/Blackpool |
Sometimes it just can't be helped,but as those that know me really well now know how to get me calm...and yes im fine eventually but have to admit, I was or must be getting better as I went to swingers club alone which I'm proud of doing in itself lol, but i wont butt in conversations but yes sorry spent the time chatting to various people over the days I went,my recent meet just literally came up to me and hugged me, then jokingly went on to say I could be an arm rest lol I'm that short, so I was at ease instantly
Plus I'm starting to be brave |
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"Shyness? Do you like it? Or does it put you off?
I am guessing most swinging couples prefer the people they meet to be very outgoing.
... though they do say 'the quiet ones are the worst'"
People often think I'm shy... Especially in this scene, I get asked all the time...
The reality is, I'm the opposite to most here, I used to be really outgoing, extroverted and (still can) chat like crazy...
But as time has progressed, I have learned and felt the need to bite my tongue.
Now that has become my natural state, to the point where I can quite easily say nothing for a whole night... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mr here id love to know how people get over shyness im massively outgoing in all social settings people always say im the life and soul etc but when it comes to women and intimacy i am massively shy i know its down to insecurity about myself but hkw did people get over this |
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By *lla_maiWoman
over a year ago
staffordshire |
I used to be really really shy and quiet, in socials with couples I'm not too bad now and can usually chat comfortably, but in large gatherings or clubs, i tend to go quiet and shy, could never see myself going to a club alone because of it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to be really really shy and quiet, in socials with couples I'm not too bad now and can usually chat comfortably, but in large gatherings or clubs, i tend to go quiet and shy, could never see myself going to a club alone because of it "
Im not sure you have any need to be shy you have an incredible figure.... Just wow  |
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By *lla_maiWoman
over a year ago
staffordshire |
"I used to be really really shy and quiet, in socials with couples I'm not too bad now and can usually chat comfortably, but in large gatherings or clubs, i tend to go quiet and shy, could never see myself going to a club alone because of it
Im not sure you have any need to be shy you have an incredible figure.... Just wow "
Thankyou. . Its not about the figure though, although I'm content with it. For me it all stems from childhood, thankfully compared to how I was, I've changed. Even from how I was a few years ago I'm completelt different. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doesn't bother me, I tend to be good with shy people, make them feel at ease.
I was painfully shy myself once and it feels crap.
How did you stop being shy?"
I made myself be the first to speak. Every time I was in a group of strangers I'd force myself to say something believing everyone else was as nervous as I. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
When I'm feeling shy I ask myself if I want to do whatever it is. If no, I stop. If yes, I stop thinking and just do it.
It can make me seem a bit matter of fact, or even cold or clinical about things to start with sometimes, but I'd rather that than let my anxieties stop me from doing things I want to do. |
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I'm shy and get nervous and sometimes doubt myself
Hopefully by the time I meet someone some of that has evaporated through natural conversation but there are times when I still haven't been able to relax into the social (never mind consider more)
I guess my shyness is either liked by some or I'm not their cup of tea. ... it's just how it goes
X |
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I'm still working up to going to a club (that isn't a spa) on my own. I find it can feel awkward to start talking to people when it seems like everyone already knows each other.
Once I start to establish a conversation, I'm usually fine. It's starting off when I don't know anyone that feels tough. |
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