Hi all
want to introduce the wife to the club scene or bringing a couple home but shes not interested at all.bewtween the sheets shes really dirty but wont have any of the swinging scene
any advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not for everyone OP.
It's a lifestyle and if it's not for her then it will never work out.
I wouldn't force the issue, just accept that it's not her thing. "
Yeah sorry dude but I completely agree. There are very real reasons why swinging isn't for everyone. A wife being dirty in bed and her wanting to or wanting you to fuck other people are MASSIVELY different things. |
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"It's not for everyone OP.
It's a lifestyle and if it's not for her then it will never work out.
I wouldn't force the issue, just accept that it's not her thing. "
Not necessarily true...
Even 10 months ago I'd never have dreamed in a million years I'd be here, although husband always fantasised about it.
And yet here I am. And loving it possibly more than him!!
Never say never!! |
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"Thanks so how did he change your mind"
You could suggest that you visit a club together... just in a purely voyeuristic capacity. Just to see what it's like and how things work. Make it clear that there will be no suggestion of playing with others, just chat and watch. In return, you promise that if she is still dead against the idea, that you'll never mention it again.
Cal |
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Watch some episodes of playboy swing together, it's a sexy show anyway but it also debunks some myths about swinging and makes it less mysterious and scary, I think if she enjoys the show she may eventually consider the possibilities, just don't be pushy
But as others have said if the answer is still no then respect her wishes
My wife didn't want to swing at all when we talked about it ten years ago but things sometimes change |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks so how did he change your mind
You could suggest that you visit a club together... just in a purely voyeuristic capacity. Just to see what it's like and how things work. Make it clear that there will be no suggestion of playing with others, just chat and watch. In return, you promise that if she is still dead against the idea, that you'll never mention it again.
Cal "
This is a very good idea. |
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"I do respect her wishes by not doing it but thought she might be a bit interested"
If she said no that means there's no 'might' about it.
Either be faithful or divorce and meet a swinger. It's that simple  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does she know that you’re on here?
And how can you say you can accommodate?! "
Probably in the same way a married guy on here did when we asked. "When she is out" he said "and only in the spare bedroom". We were genuinely shocked :- O |
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"Thanks so how did he change your mind
You could suggest that you visit a club together... just in a purely voyeuristic capacity. Just to see what it's like and how things work. Make it clear that there will be no suggestion of playing with others, just chat and watch. In return, you promise that if she is still dead against the idea, that you'll never mention it again.
Cal
---------
This is a very good idea. "
All my ideas are good  |
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"Hi all
want to introduce the wife to the club scene or bringing a couple home but shes not interested at all.bewtween the sheets shes really dirty but wont have any of the swinging scene
any advice"
Why don’t you set up a single guy profile and do it without her ... oh yes you already have !
Maybe one of the reasons she firsvt feel comfortable with swinging is because she doesn’t trust you .. looks like she could be right |
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"Thanks so how did he change your mind"
'He' didn't. 'I' did. And that's the difference. He never gave up suggesting. But I never felt pressured either.
I wasn't suggesting you could change her mind. Just that she might change it herself! Loads of different events led me down this path! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi all
want to introduce the wife to the club scene or bringing a couple home but shes not interested at all.bewtween the sheets shes really dirty but wont have any of the swinging scene
any advice
Why don’t you set up a single guy profile and do it without her ... oh yes you already have !
Maybe one of the reasons she firsvt feel comfortable with swinging is because she doesn’t trust you .. looks like she could be right "
Quite seriously Trust is so very important. |
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"Hi all
want to introduce the wife to the club scene or bringing a couple home but shes not interested at all.bewtween the sheets shes really dirty but wont have any of the swinging scene
any advice
Why don’t you set up a single guy profile and do it without her ... oh yes you already have !
Maybe one of the reasons she firsvt feel comfortable with swinging is because she doesn’t trust you .. looks like she could be right
Quite seriously Trust is so very important. "
Paramount  |
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By *azielMan
over a year ago
Midlands |
I wouldnt push it. Maybe find a couple to talk to and how they manage it. Or ask someone mentioned earlier go to a club n just have a wander round. Don't have to get involved. Just watch and chat. But at the end of the day if it's not for her then it's not for her. Good luck |
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I'm with the 'respect her wishes' crowd.
If you think her issue would be the multiple partners, but she may not have an issue with sex happening around her, you could consider taking her to a sauna-based club (such as Chams, but I'm sure there are other good ones) on a couples-only night and spend the time playing together rather than with anyone else, and see if she digs the vibe or not, and drop it if she doesn't.
Many years ago, our first foray into the scene was at the Bristol Gardens Health Spa in Brighton on a quick trip to the seaside. It's not strictly speaking a swingers club and has great spa facilities but it was a great way to dip our toes in the water with zero pressure and decide if we want to take it further. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Leave it for a while then gently suggest it again. Discuss it fully with her, listen to her, explain your opinions and views on why you think it may be good for your relationship, after all, your wants and needs are important too. But if she definetley won't entertain the idea, then you have to decide if you can settle for staying how you are, or if you're prepared to explore other options. Good luck, and hope you work something out wherever the both of you are happy and content.
Angel |
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Seeing as you haven't answered some of the questions raised by other couples (which is what swinging is really about) you don't respect your wife as it does appear you've gone behind her back with the single guy profile. Only the strongest of loving relationships can survive this lifestyle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get her crazy pissed and take her to a club. That works for loads of husbands.
Yes and how doomed is that!"
I know. Didn't say it was a good idea.
But it still happens.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get her crazy pissed and take her to a club. That works for loads of husbands.
Yes and how doomed is that!
I know. Didn't say it was a good idea.
But it still happens. "
You are absolutely right! It still happens and it’s a very bad idea. |
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