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narcissism
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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...and don't let the irony be lost - this topic will go as silent as the grave. Watch carefully in the other threads. You'll have an in depth topic, then, out from the blue someone will add their own personal anecdote to the topic. They'll take no interest in what was said before their addition and just feel better about themselves that you now know a bit more about them! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Didn't know about narcissism until I went out with one. Blimey!
I married one. Wanna start a recovery group?  "
The only way to recover from a narcissist is to stay the fuck away from one!     |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My mates ex is extremely narcissistic.
Her 17 yr old son took an overdose and as her ex husband was trying to talk about it she swiftly turned the conversation around to be about younger men fancying her and she was giggling like a school girl.  |
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"...and don't let the irony be lost - this topic will go as silent as the grave. Watch carefully in the other threads. You'll have an in depth topic, then, out from the blue someone will add their own personal anecdote to the topic. They'll take no interest in what was said before their addition and just feel better about themselves that you now know a bit more about them!"
So are you a psychologist. You seem like so dead clever.
What do you call a person that sells themselves for nsa sex with other people’s photos  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"...and don't let the irony be lost - this topic will go as silent as the grave. Watch carefully in the other threads. You'll have an in depth topic, then, out from the blue someone will add their own personal anecdote to the topic. They'll take no interest in what was said before their addition and just feel better about themselves that you now know a bit more about them!
So are you a psychologist. You seem like so dead clever.
What do you call a person that sells themselves for nsa sex with other people’s photos "
You flatter me, but really, this thread is not about me!
I have no idea what someone that sells themselves for nsa sex with other peoples photos is called. I'd question their motives though!  |
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!"
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My mates ex is extremely narcissistic.
Her 17 yr old son took an overdose and as her ex husband was trying to talk about it she swiftly turned the conversation around to be about younger men fancying her and she was giggling like a school girl. "
You mean she had zero empathy or understanding of the suffering of others and everything which mattered just concentrated or orbited around her. Yup, that's behaviour consistent with a narcissist. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests."
The key is the ability to empathise with others for the condition not to be pathological. Everyone has an element of narcissism. A narcissist cranks it up to 11. |
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests.
The key is the ability to empathise with others for the condition not to be pathological. Everyone has an element of narcissism. A narcissist cranks it up to 11. "
I get that, but the ability to diagnose narcissism by observation or anecdote is a rare skill, and there's always a risk, I suspect, that narcissistic behaviour as a symptom of other issues might be mistaken for narcissistic personality disorder. Sometimes people behave badly for reasons that are exogenous, not the consequence of a disorder. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests.
The key is the ability to empathise with others for the condition not to be pathological. Everyone has an element of narcissism. A narcissist cranks it up to 11. I get that, but the ability to diagnose narcissism by observation or anecdote is a rare skill, and there's always a risk, I suspect, that narcissistic behaviour as a symptom of other issues might be mistaken for narcissistic personality disorder. Sometimes people behave badly for reasons that are exogenous, not the consequence of a disorder."
That's an interesting point. Do exgenous reasons exclude a diagnosis of NPD or mitigate one? |
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests.
The key is the ability to empathise with others for the condition not to be pathological. Everyone has an element of narcissism. A narcissist cranks it up to 11. I get that, but the ability to diagnose narcissism by observation or anecdote is a rare skill, and there's always a risk, I suspect, that narcissistic behaviour as a symptom of other issues might be mistaken for narcissistic personality disorder. Sometimes people behave badly for reasons that are exogenous, not the consequence of a disorder.
That's an interesting point. Do exgenous reasons exclude a diagnosis of NPD or mitigate one?"
No idea. I'd guess you do the appropriate diagnostics, including taking a full history, then apply the relevant clinical skills.
I'm only a talented amateur with analogous skills, but one of the things I'm hugely wary of is the tendency for hyperbolic labelling; so people describe someone who's a bit of a shit as a psychopath, when, for all practical purposes, we just need to know someone is a bit of a shit. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wow I must have failed English gcse I just had to Google the meaning!!
A dictionary is only one of the starting points. Narcissism is a fascinating topic, but I always wonder at how people who are keen to diagnose it in others would do on even the most basic of self diagnostic tests.
The key is the ability to empathise with others for the condition not to be pathological. Everyone has an element of narcissism. A narcissist cranks it up to 11. I get that, but the ability to diagnose narcissism by observation or anecdote is a rare skill, and there's always a risk, I suspect, that narcissistic behaviour as a symptom of other issues might be mistaken for narcissistic personality disorder. Sometimes people behave badly for reasons that are exogenous, not the consequence of a disorder.
That's an interesting point. Do exgenous reasons exclude a diagnosis of NPD or mitigate one?No idea. I'd guess you do the appropriate diagnostics, including taking a full history, then apply the relevant clinical skills.
I'm only a talented amateur with analogous skills, but one of the things I'm hugely wary of is the tendency for hyperbolic labelling; so people describe someone who's a bit of a shit as a psychopath, when, for all practical purposes, we just need to know someone is a bit of a shit."
I see your point. Mislabelling helps no one. Someone being a shit isn't necessarily a narcissist, but a narcissist is always a bit of a shit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My mates ex is extremely narcissistic.
Her 17 yr old son took an overdose and as her ex husband was trying to talk about it she swiftly turned the conversation around to be about younger men fancying her and she was giggling like a school girl.
You mean she had zero empathy or understanding of the suffering of others and everything which mattered just concentrated or orbited around her. Yup, that's behaviour consistent with a narcissist. "
Yep  |
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I dated one for 9 months....at first I coped quite well...but it soon took over the relationship.... and actually started to impact on my well being (mentally).... Thus I made the choice to walk.... albeit I think I felt more pain about the break up than he did when we split....
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Narcissism...the topic for which you can all talk about yourselves..."
we all have a bit of self love and I think in moderation its fine .........continuously seeking attention,which is quite common here is more about gratifying the soul |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So in a nutshell .. what is your definition of one ."
looks in mirror ,kisses mirror ,takes pics everyday in mirror ,talks to oneself and even answers oneself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Most people don't know..until it's too late. Plenty in this environment though when you know what to look for. "
What do you mean 'until it's too late'? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Until you've fallen for a true narcissist you really can't understand how dangerous and destructive they are. Look up Gaslighting if youre interested.
There does seem to be a few with narcissistic tendencies on here so take care x |
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By *ky19Man
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"Until you've fallen for a true narcissist you really can't understand how dangerous and destructive they are. Look up Gaslighting if youre interested.
There does seem to be a few with narcissistic tendencies on here so take care x "
This.
Thankfully I think people are generally becoming more aware. I can spot a real narcissist pretty quick now. Usually they're really nice until the first sign of not getting what they want, then they suddenly change in a blink of an eye and it all starts to come out.
I'm thinking of a few customers on my job, and I just smile to myself when I realise what I'm dealing with, smile because I'm not in their clutches. Though some poor other person probably is... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I watched my female friend fall victim to this...so hard to watch when there is nothing u can say or do to change the situation. thankfully she's out of it now...not an easy process tho |
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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago
Near Marlborough |
Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x |
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By *ky19Man
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x "
No I don't either, but there needs to be a thread for the real thing. Real narcissists are dangerous people, there's no level to which they won't stoop. They destroy everything beautiful in someone. Someone mentioned gas lighting. They always seem to try to convince you you're insane and that everything you've ever loved, believed in, and known to be true is wrong. They will insist to the grave on this and not let go. They are incapable of introspection and emotional growth, instantly throwing the most ludicrous blame and guilt onto you or anyone else, but it will never be themselves. Left unchecked, they will eventually destroy even the strongest person.
I know you know this V, but I think only people who have experienced it can really understand it.  |
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"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x
No I don't either, but there needs to be a thread for the real thing. Real narcissists are dangerous people, there's no level to which they won't stoop. They destroy everything beautiful in someone. Someone mentioned gas lighting. They always seem to try to convince you you're insane and that everything you've ever loved, believed in, and known to be true is wrong. They will insist to the grave on this and not let go. They are incapable of introspection and emotional growth, instantly throwing the most ludicrous blame and guilt onto you or anyone else, but it will never be themselves. Left unchecked, they will eventually destroy even the strongest person.
I know you know this V, but I think only people who have experienced it can really understand it. "
I know it. |
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By *ky19Man
over a year ago
Plymouth |
About the only good thing I can say is a victim who has suffered from a narcissist will be able to be more empathetic to other people. In fact, they prey on empathy to start with.
I think many of us, including me, forget and don't realise, there are more than likely plenty on this site. It was probably a narcissist who reported me for prostitution on here(!) after I made it clear I wouldn't be jumping through all the hoops they wanted me to for them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm sorry I know it can be horrible suffering. Its even worse when its a guy doing it to a Lady IMO."
Since when did one gender become more worthy of sympathy than the other? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x "
It (this thread) was meant to, the opening line was just to stimulate input.
On tthe whole, discussion input is on par with what I hoped...highlighting the confusing, controlling and harmful effects of the narcissist. |
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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago
Near Marlborough |
"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x
It (this thread) was meant to, the opening line was just to stimulate input.
On tthe whole, discussion input is on par with what I hoped...highlighting the confusing, controlling and harmful effects of the narcissist. "
Well it did that
Very interesting what people think it means and a few who have real experience of the effects of narcissism on their lives.
V x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x
It (this thread) was meant to, the opening line was just to stimulate input.
On tthe whole, discussion input is on par with what I hoped...highlighting the confusing, controlling and harmful effects of the narcissist.
Well it did that
Very interesting what people think it means and a few who have real experience of the effects of narcissism on their lives.
V x "
I agree entirely V.
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"Real narcissism is not about stamping your foot because you don’t get what you want. Nor is it about loving the sound of your own voice. A true narcissist can do real emotional harm. I don’t think this thread is really about the real narcissist
V x
No I don't either, but there needs to be a thread for the real thing. Real narcissists are dangerous people, there's no level to which they won't stoop. They destroy everything beautiful in someone. Someone mentioned gas lighting. They always seem to try to convince you you're insane and that everything you've ever loved, believed in, and known to be true is wrong. They will insist to the grave on this and not let go. They are incapable of introspection and emotional growth, instantly throwing the most ludicrous blame and guilt onto you or anyone else, but it will never be themselves. Left unchecked, they will eventually destroy even the strongest person.
I know you know this V, but I think only people who have experienced it can really understand it. "
I was married to a narrsasist for 15 years, had children with him and he broke us all, we have been away from him almost 6 years now and we still have not fully recovered and tbh i can't see it happening any time soon, it took me 5 years from the momemt i knew what i had to do to take that first step into ending the marrage , it was the worst time of my life and I will never forgive him for the mental, emotional and physical harm he inflicted on my children...but we are free completely now as my divorce was finalised 2 months ago after a lengthy battle in court, so yes these people do real serious harm, until you have had any kind of dealings with a narrsasist then you don't truly know what it really is! |
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