FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Misleading Profile?
Misleading Profile?
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Hi All, Happy New Year
I have for the last few days been chatting to a couple who are on here both listed as straight. After establishing contact and some encouraging messages around a cuckold situation/threesome I was asked (presumably by the male half) if I would play bi, male on male. I initially said no, not my thing, but eventually agreed that I would not mind being touched by the husband but not oral/or full on male on male but came under persistent pressure to allow more. I have subsequently bowed out (politely) from the contact but now wonder if I should report this as a misleading/dishonest profile? My inclination is just to let it lie but should I report it for the sake of other members? |
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By *ancgent74Man
over a year ago
Denton, Manchester |
What would you report it for?
Surely that's what the discussion before a meet is for? You didn't like what was on offer so declined. That s how it should work
Just move on and save the reporting for serious issues so Admin can focus thier attention better 
|
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Thanks for that, it was what I was inclined to do but feel folk should be upfront. If the guy wants to play with or is curious about playing with men it should be on their profile. I leave it lie. OP |
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"What would you report it for?
Surely that's what the discussion before a meet is for? You didn't like what was on offer so declined. That s how it should work
Just move on and save the reporting for serious issues so Admin can focus thier attention better
"
We think the issue is the OP feeling pressured into doing something he was not comfortable with, by someone who claimed they were straight. So yes, the couples profile he mentions is somewhat misleading. That's if it was actually a couple and not a single male getting off on the conversation.
OP, never entertain the idea of doing anything you feel the slightest discomfort with. Good on you for making the right decision and backing out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I (the female) personally think you’ve been mislead.
To me it sounds like the guy is Bi but hasn’t got the balls to put that in his profile.
Lucky you had decent conversations beforehand and established what was what.
I’d be frustrated having invested time this couple
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely this is the whole point of messaging with people before meeting them. Not everyone is compatible. They may have their reasons for not disclosing about the male being bi in their profile, but they've been upfront and honest by telling you before you met them.
We see no reason for reporting whatsoever. |
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By *ancgent74Man
over a year ago
Denton, Manchester |
"
We think the issue is the OP feeling pressured into doing something he was not comfortable with, by someone who claimed they were straight. So yes, the couples profile he mentions is somewhat misleading."
Oh please don't get me wrong, I agree if they say straight on the profile it is misleading, but there is an amazing amount of guys on here with "straight" on thier profile that message me on bothe this and out couples profile looking for a Bi meet. When I question the status they always say "because some people don't like to play with bi guys".
Exagerated and misleading profiles are plentiful on all sites like this as people try to "advertise" themselves in the best possible light forgetting that the end game is a meet and all be eventually found out :D
What's important is that, although it's frustrating to OP, no actual harm was done. If it had happened on an actual meet, I'd agree it would be a reportable issue. As it happens, OP was savvy enough to not agree to something he wasn't comfortable with (although agreeing to touching may have been seen as a green light) so no actual harm was done.
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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago
Maidstone |
Bisexuality is pretty wide in its definition so always good to check.
Since I transitioned, my male sexual partners have varied tremendously.
Some guys I've been with are fully bisexual, so would have full sex with Women/TV/TS or Men... Others, like my ex BF would have sex with cis-Women and other TV/TS but would not touch men. |
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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago
Maidstone |
"When I question the status they always say "because some people don't like to play with bi guys".
"
I get that a lot too - they have no traces on their profile other than vanilla straight - no Verifications or even Friends who are TV/TS as yet they approach me for sex.
The implication is that being anything other than "straight" is somehow tarnishing their reputation. |
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By *reykiwi500Man
over a year ago
West Kent (near Tonbridge) |
In my opinion, the profile is a bit mis-leading, but unfortunately there are so many instances of someone being 'Fab straight' on this site it would be a bit difficult to report. I've encountered this a few times over the years and find it irritating but one of those things you have to put up with on here.
Good on you OP for bowing out once you felt uncomfortable and I agree with the earlier comment that at least it happened before you were on a meet! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No matter what it is, we expect honesty from the start. If a couple turns into a single, or a single suddenly announces a friend wants to join in or they state accommodate but they can't; we just delete messages and block.
If they fibbed or were a bit shady about something, what else are they lying about? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi All, Happy New Year
I have for the last few days been chatting to a couple who are on here both listed as straight. After establishing contact and some encouraging messages around a cuckold situation/threesome I was asked (presumably by the male half) if I would play bi, male on male. I initially said no, not my thing, but eventually agreed that I would not mind being touched by the husband but not oral/or full on male on male but came under persistent pressure to allow more. I have subsequently bowed out (politely) from the contact but now wonder if I should report this as a misleading/dishonest profile? My inclination is just to let it lie but should I report it for the sake of other members?"
Let it gooo, let it goooo |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Misleading no
you was gonna allow a man to touch you ( was this pressuried or wanting a meet so badly u agreed)
Stick to your boundaries what you are comfortable with and no is no both sides |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi All, Happy New Year
I have for the last few days been chatting to a couple who are on here both listed as straight. After establishing contact and some encouraging messages around a cuckold situation/threesome I was asked (presumably by the male half) if I would play bi, male on male. I initially said no, not my thing, but eventually agreed that I would not mind being touched by the husband but not oral/or full on male on male but came under persistent pressure to allow more. I have subsequently bowed out (politely) from the contact but now wonder if I should report this as a misleading/dishonest profile? My inclination is just to let it lie but should I report it for the sake of other members?"
If you report every misleading profile you see it’d become a full time job. |
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Maybe all the straight men who are bi, bi men who are straight and bi fems who are pillow princesses doing it for their hubby should be reported too. That's the who point of messaging and defining boundaries. Not everythibg is black and white. |
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"Are you sure it was actually a couple that you were chatting with?
Sounds like the single guy fake couple profile to us.  "
This.
Reporting someone for the wrong sexuality won't go anywhere. They were upfront before the meet and it can be changed at will anyway.
Just forget it and move on. |
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Thank you all for your comments, advice and observations. As most of you noted I did at least learn about this prior to arranging a meet which might have been much more difficult to begin with. I probably conceded too much by agreeing that 'he' might handle me but I had been persuaded that 'she' would be especially turned on by this. We live and learn. Happily, I am not 'desperate' as one contributor suggested so I ended the chat. Although not desperate I was enthusiastic as the lady was very attractive and I would have been well pleased to help her partner give her a special time.
Whether they were genuine perhaps remains an open question? There was one verification but not by meet, from someone who said they 'knew them and that they were friendly and fun'. Probably a mate from the pub!
Again thanks for the help and advice, leave them be and turn my attentions to the genuine on here is the adopted plan. Have a swinging 2018 all of you, and if you are straight and interested in an older.... please say hello...Alan OP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think their profile is misleading yes definitely, the man should probably list as bi curious at least. I doubt there's anything could be done to make people more honest though. It just shows to prove the importance of chatting before meets. XXX |
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Its annoying that people do lie on their profiles,you only have to look at the amount of Bi men threads a week,to know people will claim things for meets.
I have no bi tendencies what so ever ,so this would have annoyed me quite a bit.
If you are not comfortable do not be pressured,simply block and move on.
If they seek Bi play,it should be made clear from the off and on their profile ,save wasting anyones time.
Miss |
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"Its annoying that people do lie on their profiles,you only have to look at the amount of Bi men threads a week,to know people will claim things for meets.
I have no bi tendencies what so ever ,so this would have annoyed me quite a bit.
If you are not comfortable do not be pressured,simply block and move on.
If they seek Bi play,it should be made clear from the off and on their profile ,save wasting anyones time.
Miss"
Yes but the anti label police don’t like people telling the truth. That just makes life far too easy  |
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"Its annoying that people do lie on their profiles,you only have to look at the amount of Bi men threads a week,to know people will claim things for meets.
I have no bi tendencies what so ever ,so this would have annoyed me quite a bit.
If you are not comfortable do not be pressured,simply block and move on.
If they seek Bi play,it should be made clear from the off and on their profile ,save wasting anyones time.
Miss
Yes but the anti label police don’t like people telling the truth. That just makes life far too easy "
I would much rather have the truth ... |
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"Its annoying that people do lie on their profiles,you only have to look at the amount of Bi men threads a week,to know people will claim things for meets.
I have no bi tendencies what so ever ,so this would have annoyed me quite a bit.
If you are not comfortable do not be pressured,simply block and move on.
If they seek Bi play,it should be made clear from the off and on their profile ,save wasting anyones time.
Miss
Yes but the anti label police don’t like people telling the truth. That just makes life far too easy
I would much rather have the truth ..."
Me too but I keep getting shot down in flames on this subject  |
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"Its annoying that people do lie on their profiles,you only have to look at the amount of Bi men threads a week,to know people will claim things for meets.
I have no bi tendencies what so ever ,so this would have annoyed me quite a bit.
If you are not comfortable do not be pressured,simply block and move on.
If they seek Bi play,it should be made clear from the off and on their profile ,save wasting anyones time.
Miss
Yes but the anti label police don’t like people telling the truth. That just makes life far too easy
I would much rather have the truth ...
Me too but I keep getting shot down in flames on this subject "
I wont shoot ya down  |
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"Thank you all for your comments, advice and observations. As most of you noted I did at least learn about this prior to arranging a meet which might have been much more difficult to begin with. I probably conceded too much by agreeing that 'he' might handle me but I had been persuaded that 'she' would be especially turned on by this. We live and learn. Happily, I am not 'desperate' as one contributor suggested so I ended the chat. Although not desperate I was enthusiastic as the lady was very attractive and I would have been well pleased to help her partner give her a special time.
Whether they were genuine perhaps remains an open question? There was one verification but not by meet, from someone who said they 'knew them and that they were friendly and fun'. Probably a mate from the pub!
Again thanks for the help and advice, leave them be and turn my attentions to the genuine on here is the adopted plan. Have a swinging 2018 all of you, and if you are straight and interested in an older.... please say hello...Alan OP"
There are plenty of openly bi guys on here. Why anyone would suggest to coerce someone into doing something they’re not comfortable with god only knows. What a risky, unhorny and potentially volatile situation to suggest. This is where “Fab straight” is so so wrong and the assumption therefore that genuinely straight guys aren’t  |
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"Hi All, Happy New Year
I have for the last few days been chatting to a couple who are on here both listed as straight. After establishing contact and some encouraging messages around a cuckold situation/threesome I was asked (presumably by the male half) if I would play bi, male on male. I initially said no, not my thing, but eventually agreed that I would not mind being touched by the husband but not oral/or full on male on male but came under persistent pressure to allow more. I have subsequently bowed out (politely) from the contact but now wonder if I should report this as a misleading/dishonest profile? My inclination is just to let it lie but should I report it for the sake of other members?"
I think you are going way too much into it. He may be bi he may not he may be bi but think he is not who knows peoples sexuality can change you know. If you seriously think its a matter to report someone on then you seriously have issues in life! If you are not interested and move on x
Ps your profile says straight but by your own admission you agreed some man on man action. Do you think people should report you for the same foe par?
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'Fleur', my original post concluded that I would leave this and wasn't inclined to report it. I was interested in the 'etiquette' and whether there would be a consensus in favour of speaking up for honesty in profiles. As far I am concerned this is history and a useful lesson in how to use the site. In any future exchanges I am straight, not negotiable, full stop. Thanks for comments. OP |
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"
Yes but the anti label police don’t like people telling the truth. That just makes life far too easy
I would much rather have the truth ...
Me too but I keep getting shot down in flames on this subject "
There's lots of vocal minorities in the forum, I think most people understand and appreciate the truth. |
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"'Fleur', my original post concluded that I would leave this and wasn't inclined to report it. I was interested in the 'etiquette' and whether there would be a consensus in favour of speaking up for honesty in profiles. As far I am concerned this is history and a useful lesson in how to use the site. In any future exchanges I am straight, not negotiable, full stop. Thanks for comments. OP"
Also a useful lesson in fake spotting. The MO was typical of a fake looking for wank fodder. Live and learn |
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"What would you report it for?
Surely that's what the discussion before a meet is for? You didn't like what was on offer so declined. That s how it should work
Just move on and save the reporting for serious issues so Admin can focus thier attention better
"
exactly  |
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"No matter what it is, we expect honesty from the start. If a couple turns into a single, or a single suddenly announces a friend wants to join in or they state accommodate but they can't; we just delete messages and block.
If they fibbed or were a bit shady about something, what else are they lying about?"
 |
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We have to agree with what seems to be the majority here. Let it go. Block and move on. Pin in the arse (sic) that he or they ( you're not sure ) weren't honest up front but many people are here discovering new things and that's great. Agree they did it the wrong way but at least you didn't find out once tied to bed etc. Far worse false profiles on here which I am sure have all wasted our time and emotions on. Picture hunters. Men acting as women and werifying themselves with false profiles and many other examples.
We love a bit of cock sharing but not all do.  |
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By *iliciousCouple
over a year ago
Sussex/Surrey |
Agree. Bow out, block, move on. It’s annoying when it happens but really no point in reporting. We had a couple recently chat chat chat - they pursued us, not the other way around - seemed nice enough and possibly were. They chased us for a video meet, then said they didn’t know when it could happen, then casually dropped in that they were in expecting their first in February!
They seemed offended when we said that we wouldn’t be in contact again.
Irritating waste of time but there you go - block, move on. |
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By *reykiwi500Man
over a year ago
West Kent (near Tonbridge) |
"Thank you all for your comments, advice and observations. As most of you noted I did at least learn about this prior to arranging a meet which might have been much more difficult to begin with. I probably conceded too much by agreeing that 'he' might handle me but I had been persuaded that 'she' would be especially turned on by this. We live and learn. Happily, I am not 'desperate' as one contributor suggested so I ended the chat. Although not desperate I was enthusiastic as the lady was very attractive and I would have been well pleased to help her partner give her a special time.
Whether they were genuine perhaps remains an open question? There was one verification but not by meet, from someone who said they 'knew them and that they were friendly and fun'. Probably a mate from the pub!
Again thanks for the help and advice, leave them be and turn my attentions to the genuine on here is the adopted plan. Have a swinging 2018 all of you, and if you are straight and interested in an older.... please say hello...Alan OP
There are plenty of openly bi guys on here. Why anyone would suggest to coerce someone into doing something they’re not comfortable with god only knows. What a risky, unhorny and potentially volatile situation to suggest. This is where “Fab straight” is so so wrong and the assumption therefore that genuinely straight guys aren’t "
Couldn't have said that any better |
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"Hi All, Happy New Year
I have for the last few days been chatting to a couple who are on here both listed as straight. After establishing contact and some encouraging messages around a cuckold situation/threesome I was asked (presumably by the male half) if I would play bi, male on male. I initially said no, not my thing, but eventually agreed that I would not mind being touched by the husband but not oral/or full on male on male but came under persistent pressure to allow more. I have subsequently bowed out (politely) from the contact but now wonder if I should report this as a misleading/dishonest profile? My inclination is just to let it lie but should I report it for the sake of other members?"
So it sounds like you were comfortable with a little mutual masterbation (but no further).
Doesn't that qualify you as a teensy weensy bit bi? Yet YOUR profile says straight. |
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"Surely this is the whole point of messaging with people before meeting them. Not everyone is compatible. They may have their reasons for not disclosing about the male being bi in their profile, but they've been upfront and honest by telling you before you met them.
We see no reason for reporting whatsoever."
Totally agree with this.
They did inform you prior to the meet. |
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"Surely this is the whole point of messaging with people before meeting them. Not everyone is compatible. They may have their reasons for not disclosing about the male being bi in their profile, but they've been upfront and honest by telling you before you met them.
We see no reason for reporting whatsoever.
Totally agree with this.
They did inform you prior to the meet."
Absolutely |
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By *rnortholtMan
over a year ago
Waveney Valley & London |
I don't get the "that's what chatting before a meet is for."
Those kind of conversations are to finesse the details of what is or isn't wanted.
This is more akin to a couple, only revealing that she doesn't play and he would like a solo meet in one of their mails.
Some things are pretty fundamental and people should be upfront about them.
That said, many are not and I'm not sure about reporting |
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After chatting for ages I had arranged a meet at a club with a couple. Would have been my first club experience.
I checked and it was a bi night they wanted to meet on. They mislead me a bit so I didn’t feel comfortable meeting with them. Defo not into being stealth licked by the guy while fucking the wife. Put me right off. |
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