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Stag and submissive vixen?
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I’ve recently become interested in what I think might come under the Stag and Vixen bracket. I don’t particularly go for labels but conscious they can be helpful in explaining a bit better what you’re looking for, even if these things are really what you choose to make of them.
I’m submissive with the right man and love the idea of being shared by a regular partner/FWB for the evening, potentially with more than one man. But I’m not looking for anything forced or non-consensual - no throw me on a bed and welcome to all comers so to speak. For me it’s more a ‘what do you think of him, let’s go for it’ approach. A key factor is that it is my partner’s ultimate decision and choice to share me - but I guess in a respectful way.
Is there another description for this or would Stag and Vixen cover it well enough? Does anyone play with this dynamic? |
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"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts? "
To an extent but then isn’t that the same of any hotwife/stag and vixen scenario? The key factor for me is being shared, not necessarily with just one man either. And taking the back seat to let the decision be made by someone else rather than a mutual decision to invite someone to join you both. The consent bit is more about him making decisions he knows I would be happy with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve recently become interested in what I think might come under the Stag and Vixen bracket. I don’t particularly go for labels but conscious they can be helpful in explaining a bit better what you’re looking for, even if these things are really what you choose to make of them.
I’m submissive with the right man and love the idea of being shared by a regular partner/FWB for the evening, potentially with more than one man. But I’m not looking for anything forced or non-consensual - no throw me on a bed and welcome to all comers so to speak. For me it’s more a ‘what do you think of him, let’s go for it’ approach. A key factor is that it is my partner’s ultimate decision and choice to share me - but I guess in a respectful way.
Is there another description for this or would Stag and Vixen cover it well enough? Does anyone play with this dynamic? "
Hi,
We would describe ourselves as stag/vixen and pretty much mirror what you are describing. R likes playing with guys and can be submissive (and demanding at the same time!) but I is more alpha, enjoys watching R satisfied and having fun but then joining in rather than being cuckold as such.
For us it is more if a joint decision to play rather than one of us taking the decision to share but we very much approach the situation to just go to a club, see who is there and who we might get on with. Whilst we are ultimately looking for another guy or couple to join us, we need to know everyone is comfortable and respectful and like you are not looking for a free for all (though we have nothing against those who are more adventurous). We like the conversation and having a laugh and if things end up getting hot then that’s a bonus.
We really like this dynamic as it takes the pressure off us feeling that we need to perform or impress and means that when things do happen then they are more relaxed and we know everyone will enjoy themselves without anyone being left out. Although we are just starting out on the journey (big old cliche!), we find a stag/vixen mindset really hot, open and respectful, so it works well for us. Hope you find what you are looking for too and sure you will enjoy it if you do explore as a stag/vixen X |
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"Hi,
We would describe ourselves as stag/vixen and pretty much mirror what you are describing. R likes playing with guys and can be submissive (and demanding at the same time!) but I is more alpha, enjoys watching R satisfied and having fun but then joining in rather than being cuckold as such.
For us it is more if a joint decision to play rather than one of us taking the decision to share but we very much approach the situation to just go to a club, see who is there and who we might get on with. Whilst we are ultimately looking for another guy or couple to join us, we need to know everyone is comfortable and respectful and like you are not looking for a free for all (though we have nothing against those who are more adventurous). We like the conversation and having a laugh and if things end up getting hot then that’s a bonus.
We really like this dynamic as it takes the pressure off us feeling that we need to perform or impress and means that when things do happen then they are more relaxed and we know everyone will enjoy themselves without anyone being left out. Although we are just starting out on the journey (big old cliche!), we find a stag/vixen mindset really hot, open and respectful, so it works well for us. Hope you find what you are looking for too and sure you will enjoy it if you do explore as a stag/vixen X"
Thanks glad you are enjoying it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds to me like a lot of real world D/s relationships. Any D that consistently pushed their s in to activities or situations they were unhappy with would end up an ex-D. 
The s is the D's most cherished "possession" and as such wants them to be happy, their needs sated. If that means that the s has to be "told" to behave in an abandoned manner with others a smart D does so. They also make sure those chosen to take advantage of the s are suitable.
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"Sounds to me like a lot of real world D/s relationships. Any D that consistently pushed their s in to activities or situations they were unhappy with would end up an ex-D.
The s is the D's most cherished "possession" and as such wants them to be happy, their needs sated. If that means that the s has to be "told" to behave in an abandoned manner with others a smart D does so. They also make sure those chosen to take advantage of the s are suitable.
"
Thanks - I guess no surprise there - it's very much my thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts?
How about Dumb and Dumper..more like it... 
Sorry, meaning?"
Sorry, no offense. I just find the whole d/s thing stupid and I cant stop myself posting in these forums... |
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"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts?
How about Dumb and Dumper..more like it...
Sorry, meaning?
Sorry, no offense. I just find the whole d/s thing stupid and I cant stop myself posting in these forums..."
What a shame you can't walk on past something that doesn't do it for you instead of leaving a judgemental comment.
There are many different types of D/s relationship and while they are not for everyone, if it gives someone pleasure does that matter? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts?
How about Dumb and Dumper..more like it...
Sorry, meaning?
Sorry, no offense. I just find the whole d/s thing stupid and I cant stop myself posting in these forums...
What a shame you can't walk on past something that doesn't do it for you instead of leaving a judgemental comment.
There are many different types of D/s relationship and while they are not for everyone, if it gives someone pleasure does that matter?"
It doesnt matter. Its just because in most cases its a situation of misogynist bullying men taking advantage of women like you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts?
How about Dumb and Dumper..more like it...
Sorry, meaning?
Sorry, no offense. I just find the whole d/s thing stupid and I cant stop myself posting in these forums...
What a shame you can't walk on past something that doesn't do it for you instead of leaving a judgemental comment.
There are many different types of D/s relationship and while they are not for everyone, if it gives someone pleasure does that matter?
It doesnt matter. Its just because in most cases its a situation of misogynist bullying men taking advantage of women like you."
Think this is getting a long way from the stag/vixen theme that it started out as. In terms of S/V relationships, it’s the woman who has the power really in that she is free to play and in most cases (certainly ours) is the one who decides if she wants to and with who.
The only element that could be linked to D/s really is that the pleasure and enjoyment of the vixen is the centre of the stags attention - he is more interested in her needs than his own. Other than that, there is no coercion or taking advantage of each other, it’s just about us having a good time and her knowing she is free to do what she wants.
The reason we identify as stag/vixen more than anything else is that despite the stag being a straight, highly driven guy, he is not that interested in playing with other women all that often (although is free to do so if we find someone or a couple we both like). Instead he is happy for the vixen to experience something new that she wants to try rather than put his own needs first.
For us, the build up, flirting, eye contact when playing etc mean that although she may be with someone else the main connection remain between us and the whole experience is about enhancing what we have.
There should be no bullying or submission in a stag/vixen relationship - it’s about respect, trust and new experiences X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
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"Sounds like mmf to me. I don’t go along with all these animalistic labels.
How about squirrel and nuts?
How about Dumb and Dumper..more like it...
Sorry, meaning?
Sorry, no offense. I just find the whole d/s thing stupid and I cant stop myself posting in these forums...
What a shame you can't walk on past something that doesn't do it for you instead of leaving a judgemental comment.
There are many different types of D/s relationship and while they are not for everyone, if it gives someone pleasure does that matter?
It doesnt matter. Its just because in most cases its a situation of misogynist bullying men taking advantage of women like you.
Think this is getting a long way from the stag/vixen theme that it started out as. In terms of S/V relationships, it’s the woman who has the power really in that she is free to play and in most cases (certainly ours) is the one who decides if she wants to and with who.
The only element that could be linked to D/s really is that the pleasure and enjoyment of the vixen is the centre of the stags attention - he is more interested in her needs than his own. Other than that, there is no coercion or taking advantage of each other, it’s just about us having a good time and her knowing she is free to do what she wants.
The reason we identify as stag/vixen more than anything else is that despite the stag being a straight, highly driven guy, he is not that interested in playing with other women all that often (although is free to do so if we find someone or a couple we both like). Instead he is happy for the vixen to experience something new that she wants to try rather than put his own needs first.
For us, the build up, flirting, eye contact when playing etc mean that although she may be with someone else the main connection remain between us and the whole experience is about enhancing what we have.
There should be no bullying or submission in a stag/vixen relationship - it’s about respect, trust and new experiences X"
Great post  |
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Thanks Curious. I think the beauty sometimes of the forum is that it helps to refine your thinking.
I guess what I’m asking is, can it be compatible? I’m looking for somehow who is happy to share and gets enjoyment from my enjoyment so I think, looking at the type of D/s play I enjoy, that is compatible.
I was also interested in finding out if there was an existing term for that to help me articulate what it is I’m looking for.
Thanks for the responses! |
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Is there a name for a reverse stag and vixen? I absolutely adore watching my partner fuck other women. Neither of us are submissive and definitely not into humiliation, but the thought of truely sharing while I am made to watch drives me wild. |
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