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Couples Attraction

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By *isa2018 OP   Couple  over a year ago

East Northamptonshire

So, we've been around for a while.on here and also go to clubs but were still waiting for that elusive all.round attraction with another couple.

We are both fussy in our own way. If I find a lady I like the look of then the guy doesn't take her fancy or vice versa. With single guys it's easy as it's mainly her attraction and then me being comfortable with the gents attitude.

So, where couples are concerned, are we just too fussy in wanting to find 4 way attraction or are people really in a situation where, when they play with other couples, someone is compromising or 'taking one for the team' so to speak.

Interested in other people's views as it seems patience is a virtue here. I'm fully aware that S gets let of the attention, from single gents, male half of couples or bi-ladies, and there isn't going to be a fraction of the same attention for me from ladies when there are lots of eligible and fit young guys to be chosen from.

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By *i de BiCouple  over a year ago

Leicester

Good to hear you are both very considerate of each other and the `taking one for the team ` is not how you swing.

We have got more fussy the longer we have played , looking for more than just sexual attraction.

We did the club scene for nearly 10 years and think we have now gone past that & happy to play now & then when the urge arises .

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By *illyjohnyCouple  over a year ago

brighton


"So, we've been around for a while.on here and also go to clubs but were still waiting for that elusive all.round attraction with another couple.

We are both fussy in our own way. If I find a lady I like the look of then the guy doesn't take her fancy or vice versa. With single guys it's easy as it's mainly her attraction and then me being comfortable with the gents attitude.

So, where couples are concerned, are we just too fussy in wanting to find 4 way attraction or are people really in a situation where, when they play with other couples, someone is compromising or 'taking one for the team' so to speak.

Interested in other people's views as it seems patience is a virtue here. I'm fully aware that S gets let of the attention, from single gents, male half of couples or bi-ladies, and there isn't going to be a fraction of the same attention for me from ladies when there are lots of eligible and fit young guys to be chosen from."

We have the same problem as we are both straight and the 4 way attraction just doesn't seem to happen , So mfm seems easier than couples .

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By *mm and HerCouple  over a year ago

Hertfordshire

To each their own of course but we would agree on there needing to be four way attraction for us. I won't play with the man, but equally I have to feel comfortable with her with him and vice versa. We have a rule - a no questions asked veto.

Her also gets lots of attention so I think you also have to have a different perspective- they're not rejecting you but reinforcing how lucky you already are.

Hmm

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By *ade and VanessaCouple  over a year ago

Central Scotland

W wouldn't play with the other man but, like you said, he would need to be comfortable in sharing me with him. There has to be an attraction for us for them and we would expect the same. It does definitely make things trickier but not impossible. So you're not alone. I wouldn't want to think any one was 'taking one for the team' with either of us!

V x

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By *ipi2001Couple  over a year ago

Birmingham

Well the issue you highlighted is common among straight couple. Attraction is important, however we understood that lower the expectations and level of attraction helps. Plus we experienced that its very improbable to find attraction... Utopia. We prefer now couples good in playing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Is it possible to find a couple that you both feel 100% physically attracted to? I’m not sure. We have learned to place more importance on the mental connection. We will always be in agreement if a couple are good company and have an erotic imagination.

V

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By *mm and HerCouple  over a year ago

Hertfordshire


"Is it possible to find a couple that you both feel 100% physically attracted to? I’m not sure. We have learned to place more importance on the mental connection. We will always be in agreement if a couple are good company and have an erotic imagination.

V"

That's very true. Sometimes you have to have an open mind. Met some people we wouldn't have thought we'd be attracted based on their profiles

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When I played as a couple someone always had to take one for the team or we would have never played.....

My ex was really picky with the height and endowment of the male half of the couples...

I was more go with the flow.....

We had a few “ I’ll play with them , but you better hurry up and cum “ conversations....

This is why going forward I will only play as a single male....

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By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Chudleigh

We find ’chatting’ on fab is helpful, but for us it depends how we click on the night in clubs. We can only really go by visuals on here, but in clubs we find that because we can use all our senses we find that their is so much more to like. It is similar to age, we have age limits on here but we don’t go round asking in clubs. But it is always easier to achieve mfm than mffm or mfmf

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think that’s why we play mainly with single guys. One because the Male half is too fussy and he also enjoys watching me more than he enjoys playing. So I am encouraging him to play a little alone so I am not such a distraction.

But at the same time I feel we are really missing out on some incredible couple meets and should really spend sometime finding the right couple to swap with.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is it possible to find a couple that you both feel 100% physically attracted to? I’m not sure. We have learned to place more importance on the mental connection. We will always be in agreement if a couple are good company and have an erotic imagination.

V

That's very true. Sometimes you have to have an open mind. Met some people we wouldn't have thought we'd be attracted based on their profiles "

Yep, this is us to. We’d have missed out on some wonderful times if we hadn’t been willing to compromise.

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By *eardsandboobsCouple  over a year ago

market rasen


"So, we've been around for a while.on here and also go to clubs but were still waiting for that elusive all.round attraction with another couple.

We are both fussy in our own way. If I find a lady I like the look of then the guy doesn't take her fancy or vice versa. With single guys it's easy as it's mainly her attraction and then me being comfortable with the gents attitude.

So, where couples are concerned, are we just too fussy in wanting to find 4 way attraction or are people really in a situation where, when they play with other couples, someone is compromising or 'taking one for the team' so to speak.

Interested in other people's views as it seems patience is a virtue here. I'm fully aware that S gets let of the attention, from single gents, male half of couples or bi-ladies, and there isn't going to be a fraction of the same attention for me from ladies when there are lots of eligible and fit young guys to be chosen from.

We have the same problem as we are both straight and the 4 way attraction just doesn't seem to happen , So mfm seems easier than couples ."

Why does being straight make a difference ? Still needs to be a four way attraction regardless of sexual orientation

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We always play with cpls if only all 4 of us like each other.

It adds to the fun a lot, especially when all 4 play in one bed.

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By *_Yeah19Couple  over a year ago

Lincoln

Absolutely not too fussy, why would you want to be any different?

We’ve been quite lucky it sounds, as there’s often enough of an attraction for us to take things forward, obviously not always.

Don’t give up, and don’t feel you have to lower your standards either

TB

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By *LIRTWITHUSCouple  over a year ago

Chester

We're clubs, social, banter, getting to know people. It's a layered approach. We have a great time as personality plays such a big part, hard to judge a spark off fab. So many like minded couples in clubs & we don't take one for the team

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have the same problem cos of our age gap.

Most say can the hot young female not meet us alone.

Instant block

And we def do not take one for the team, and understand others don't either.

We in no rush to play so it's all ok with us

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By *nvercoupleCouple  over a year ago

Inverness

So where do people stand that are neither attractive or unattractive for the people that wont "take one for the team"? Because for us the vast majority of people on this site are in this very large average bracket.

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By *issmorganWoman  over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Hi op

We struggle with this on our couple profile,plus so many have no pics of the male.

Hence us having a single profile each too.

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By *mber DextrousWoman  over a year ago

Devon

When I was on here as half of a couple we found it really hard to find that double attraction. It happened once if I remember correctly but we largely gave up finding couples on here and relied on clubs instead. Certainly neither of us were going to take one for the team.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi op

We struggle with this on our couple profile,plus so many have no pics of the male.

Hence us having a single profile each too."

We have done exactly the same.We've both now gone down the road of singles profiles as well as our main couples one.Then we arrange meets where all four of us get together as singles as opposed to waiting for 4 of us to click as such.Will report back as to how well it works out!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have given up looking for couples as we can’t find the right one where all 4 involved want to get involved. We tend to stick to finding single guys now( although that has its pitfalls too).

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By *ertsguy2000Man  over a year ago

hertford

Can I ask how you (either female or male of couple) react if you really fancy the male or female of the other couple but don’t really like your opposite number?

Ie lady really attracted to male of other couple, but really don’t like the other female, would you encourage your partner to play with them even though you don’t like them just so you can play with the one you find attractive ?

HG

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So, we've been around for a while.on here and also go to clubs but were still waiting for that elusive all.round attraction with another couple.

We are both fussy in our own way. If I find a lady I like the look of then the guy doesn't take her fancy or vice versa. With single guys it's easy as it's mainly her attraction and then me being comfortable with the gents attitude.

So, where couples are concerned, are we just too fussy in wanting to find 4 way attraction or are people really in a situation where, when they play with other couples, someone is compromising or 'taking one for the team' so to speak.

Interested in other people's views as it seems patience is a virtue here. I'm fully aware that S gets let of the attention, from single gents, male half of couples or bi-ladies, and there isn't going to be a fraction of the same attention for me from ladies when there are lots of eligible and fit young guys to be chosen from."

I suppose every couple is different. We are lucky as both boo and myself have the same taste in women which helps and on the men side as long as Mel likes that and we all get on and have a laugh no worries.

I don't think having wants and preferences can be called fussy. If you don't fancy the people you are to play with then it's unlikely you will enjoy it.

For us personality and the ability to have a laugh goes along way more than looks do within reason .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I ask how you (either female or male of couple) react if you really fancy the male or female of the other couple but don’t really like your opposite number?

Ie lady really attracted to male of other couple, but really don’t like the other female, would you encourage your partner to play with them even though you don’t like them just so you can play with the one you find attractive ?

HG"

We would walk away but some times we even run

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By *isa2018 OP   Couple  over a year ago

East Northamptonshire


"Can I ask how you (either female or male of couple) react if you really fancy the male or female of the other couple but don’t really like your opposite number?

Ie lady really attracted to male of other couple, but really don’t like the other female, would you encourage your partner to play with them even though you don’t like them just so you can play with the one you find attractive ?

HG"

No, we don't. We would never expect either of us to do that, which is Why it is so difficult to find couples where all 4 would like to play together. We've met lots of lovely people to talk to but not yet played yet. If the couple were permitted by each other to play singly then we would consider playing as a threesome but only where we've met both and know that's permitted.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Can I ask how you (either female or male of couple) react if you really fancy the male or female of the other couple but don’t really like your opposite number?

Ie lady really attracted to male of other couple, but really don’t like the other female, would you encourage your partner to play with them even though you don’t like them just so you can play with the one you find attractive ?

HG"

We have the rule that if one of us are not into it then we will politely decline.It's happened often where one of us would love to play with the opposite but there's not an attraction to play by the other one of us.We've been lucky on here we've met some fantastic singles and a few couples where all four of us click.We have never gone down the road of "taking one for the team" as someone put above.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The whole idea of taking one for the team is damaging in the long run as one partner will resent swinging in the end x

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By *ertsguy2000Man  over a year ago

hertford


"Can I ask how you (either female or male of couple) react if you really fancy the male or female of the other couple but don’t really like your opposite number?

Ie lady really attracted to male of other couple, but really don’t like the other female, would you encourage your partner to play with them even though you don’t like them just so you can play with the one you find attractive ?

HG

We would walk away but some times we even run "

Haha that bad huh??

But do you guys have a secret code or something, or is just a look from your other half enough to know that you need to make excuses and leave!!?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When you know your partner well enough, you can tell.

It doesn't have to be a secret code,a look or even shouting for hughy down the big white telephone

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By *ertsguy2000Man  over a year ago

hertford


"When you know your partner well enough, you can tell.

It doesn't have to be a secret code,a look or even shouting for hughy down the big white telephone "

Yeah I assumed that would be the case

HG

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By *offee with MilkCouple  over a year ago

Over the roundabout and then turn right.


"The whole idea of taking one for the team is damaging in the long run as one partner will resent swinging in the end x"

Seconded. We have declined offers to play when either one of us is not fully happy. Taking one for the team is never an option for us. We love each other far too much to even consider it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think like most couples here, we also struggle for 4 way attraction but neither of us would consider taking one for the team.

What may be worth you guys considering though is whether or not you share common ground on some sort of fantasy and then seeing if there are nights that cater to it. That way you are more likely to meet couples who are looking for similar things and there’s more chance of clicking. We had pretty much given up on the scene before we found our niche and now really enjoy our nights out and seeing how things play out xx

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By *ertsguy2000Man  over a year ago

hertford


"I think like most couples here, we also struggle for 4 way attraction but neither of us would consider taking one for the team.

What may be worth you guys considering though is whether or not you share common ground on some sort of fantasy and then seeing if there are nights that cater to it. That way you are more likely to meet couples who are looking for similar things and there’s more chance of clicking. We had pretty much given up on the scene before we found our niche and now really enjoy our nights out and seeing how things play out xx"

Yes I imagine common ground certainly helps, finding people on your wave length is half the battle on here I find.

HG

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

For us, it's about getting on with folk and having a laugh..We do go for certain body types though,but we are not to hung up about looks..of course that does not mean we meet everyone, but we do not expect everyone to look like Brad and Angelina, because we do certainly don't. We are not here to find love or long term partners..it's just about sex and fun.So are quite happy to meet most folk in general.

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By *exytoo2Couple  over a year ago

Newbury

We are wanting to experience more bi sex, so we both have to find you both attractive, but they also have to be attracted to us.

It's difficult looking at just a profile as personalities play a big part in this, also what people put in there profile needs to be an honest reflection of what they want

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By *aughty_Nat69Woman  over a year ago

Glasgow

Not sure the best way to say this. So please give me the benefit of the doubt and be gentle.

I think it’s hard to find a couple where both are worldies, equally hot and attractive physically. So perhaps it’s best to work on minimum acceptable standards for physical attractiveness for both of you.

Generally if both girls are Bi and both guys are straight, then you might weight the scales in favour of attractiveness towards the women??

But as long as minimum levels of attraction are met, then you should the go on personality and connect. As that is most important (I think), that’s what makes or breaks a meet.

Sometimes you just have to go for it and have fun. Get caught up in the sexual excitement and fun.

Hope that makes sense.

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple  over a year ago

Cumbria

Its cool play with what you want and how ..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So, we've been around for a while.on here and also go to clubs but were still waiting for that elusive all.round attraction with another couple.

We are both fussy in our own way. If I find a lady I like the look of then the guy doesn't take her fancy or vice versa. With single guys it's easy as it's mainly her attraction and then me being comfortable with the gents attitude.

So, where couples are concerned, are we just too fussy in wanting to find 4 way attraction or are people really in a situation where, when they play with other couples, someone is compromising or 'taking one for the team' so to speak.

Interested in other people's views as it seems patience is a virtue here. I'm fully aware that S gets let of the attention, from single gents, male half of couples or bi-ladies, and there isn't going to be a fraction of the same attention for me from ladies when there are lots of eligible and fit young guys to be chosen from."

Never ever "take one for the team" ...I had a fuck buddy who expected me too...and we were no longer fuck Buddies once I found out that was his aim....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Not sure the best way to say this. So please give me the benefit of the doubt and be gentle.

I think it’s hard to find a couple where both are worldies, equally hot and attractive physically. So perhaps it’s best to work on minimum acceptable standards for physical attractiveness for both of you.

Generally if both girls are Bi and both guys are straight, then you might weight the scales in favour of attractiveness towards the women??

But as long as minimum levels of attraction are met, then you should the go on personality and connect. As that is most important (I think), that’s what makes or breaks a meet.

Sometimes you just have to go for it and have fun. Get caught up in the sexual excitement and fun.

Hope that makes sense. "

This

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