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Helping my wife get her confidence back

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By *ottoofar OP   Man  over a year ago

around and about

So my beautiful wife and I have been swinging for a few years now, first as a couple, then meeting alone which we prefer.

But my wife has MS and after a bad relapse now finds it difficult to walk without help. The rest of her body is just fine and works perfectly well. But she’s embarrassed by it and slowly stopped meeting. After some probing she said to me ‘ why would anyone want to meet me ‘when there are so many gorgeous able bodied ladies on Fab to choose from?’

It breaks my heart because she’s normally so confident and I want her to enjoy herself again.

So what I’m asking, so I can show her, would it put you off of meeting her?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No. Of course not,

Anyone worth talking to and meeting. I would like to think aren't that shallow.

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By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman  over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

I have spine issues and can't walk much myself, hasn't put anyone off in the slightest.

I even mentioned some of my issues on my profile and got some nice/supportive messages from people who read it.

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By *musedforlifeMan  over a year ago

Scunthorpe

No, not in the slightest.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If your wife feels uncomfortable meeting,that would put us off.

We would want everyone to feel comfortable in what we are doing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wouldn’t put me off at all, personality counts for so much x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It wouldnt, I'm not a man but what puts me on is lack of manners, boring people, dumbness.. sex Is not Just body and flesh, that's gymnastic. It's a dirty and kinky mind that makes a real difference to me.

I'd try to put down a list of naughty things and role play fantasies she could do and enjoy comfortably, and look for someone for each specific point of the list.

Anyway Im walking similar shoes due to an autoimmune condition and for me It took time,years, to accept a body that is "betraying" me and decide I deserve happiness and fun in spite of It. She has a caring husband so it's already a good start.

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By *omesticated_VixenWoman  over a year ago

sw London

If I was a man no it wouldn’t she is just as beautiful now as she was before she was ill c

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By *JohnMan  over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

It wouldn't put me off. But it's how she feels that's important. Having a bunch of strangers say it is one thing, believing it herself is a lot harder.

If there's a club near you with good enough accessibility, that might be a good approach. She doesn't have to do anything she's not comfortable with, but I'm sure people will show their interest.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Aww OP. I totally empathise with your wife. What she said sounds like me. I also have MS and struggle with walking which I find embarrassing, hence why I’m not meeting. I’ve lost my confidence too. But it’s good to read the replies. Makes me feel better about myself. I hope it eases her mind. We’are both the same beautiful people. Hopefully we will get back on the horse as if were

And we are both lucky having understanding husbands. It makes things much easier

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By *he2someCouple  over a year ago

Middlesex

We have meet a lovely couple, she had MS and could not walk at all. We had a lovely meet. It was not only very good sexually but she had a wonderful sharp and witty brain. Will happily meet any lady again in the same position. Andy xx

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By *rK MrsJCouple  over a year ago

Kidderminster


"So my beautiful wife and I have been swinging for a few years now, first as a couple, then meeting alone which we prefer.

But my wife has MS and after a bad relapse now finds it difficult to walk without help. The rest of her body is just fine and works perfectly well. But she’s embarrassed by it and slowly stopped meeting. After some probing she said to me ‘ why would anyone want to meet me ‘when there are so many gorgeous able bodied ladies on Fab to choose from?’

It breaks my heart because she’s normally so confident and I want her to enjoy herself again.

So what I’m asking, so I can show her, would it put you off of meeting her?"

No it wouldn't everyone deserves fun and a sex life.

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By *inkykitten87Woman  over a year ago

York

Not at all

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A mental spark is actually more important to me than the physical. You could be gym fit, very good looking but have no spark. Or you could have a fantastic mind average looks and the spark is there.

Ms or other disability doesn't put me off, have played with a couple before where the guy was in a wheelchair. Actually happened years ago but is still to this day one of my favourite plays in a club. Fantastic couple and an epic memory.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No definitely not, she is still as beautiful with Ms than she was without

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Might help people to communicate with you if your profile wasn’t hidden?

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By *hill44Man  over a year ago

hinckley

No I would meet her , I hope she gets her confidence back, it may take time, maybe you should both have a break from swinging give her your full attention, she & you maybe in time will get back in to it slowly,

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not in the least I'm already enjoying great encounters with a lady who has the same issues, were both loving it. So what if one or two parts of your body don't work there's lots of other places to explore and enjoy. Mr

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By *he Devil rides outMan  over a year ago

Sheffield

Not in the slightest

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By *arkmanMan  over a year ago

hounslow

Not at all

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By *hesterXXXMan  over a year ago

in your dreams

Me personally? Not at all.

But I would suggest bring honest and upfront with potential meets - that way if it did bother someone then they wouldnt contact you in the first place avoiding any potential upset

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Unfortunately too much emphasis is placed upon physical appearances especially in forums and this can effect how one views oneself. It's difficult to not see oneself through how we think others see us.

The reality is chemistry starts in many ways, the mind being the most powerful and IMO the most fulfilling in any meet.

It's brilliant that you sound positive and are being positive for her too. She sounds like she needs that more than you could imagine. It's well known and documented that getting artistic has a very positive effect on ones confidence. Activities like painting, music, poetry, and dance enable one to express themselves, interact positively with others, and reduce worry and stress levels.

I don't think any decent right minded guy would find the concerns you've mentioned in anyway off putting.

Half the battle for her is won because of your support. You guys sound a great couple.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Absolutely not

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By *obbytupperMan  over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

I met a lovely couple who were in the same situation, we became good friends and met regularly both socially and for fun over a five year period. Her not being able to walk was never an issue, she was a beautiful person outside and in.

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By *icentiousCouple  over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Was?

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By *obbytupperMan  over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley


"Was?"

Yes sadly she passed away six years ago.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Defo not would love to meet x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No not at all

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple  over a year ago

North fife

I also have MS, recently diagnosed at the grand old age of 25, so far no mobility issues but it effects me in other ways that can make meeting daunting at times.

I actually really like meeting others with similar ailments as I feel I can completely be myself. I can understand your wife's feelings and I hope she managed to over come them in time.

L xx

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By *otsaCouple  over a year ago

Middlesbrough

I can totally sympathise as I've lost all my confidence sexwise too because of my health deteriorating. It's crap feeling trapped in a body that won't co-operate, and it makes you really feel vulnerable about whether you're still attractive anymore, especially when it comes to new people.

100% would meet, and I really hope she regains her confidence soon. It's definitely the chemistry that is more important than whether your body is being a bit of a twat.

R xx

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By *earded_kent_GentMan  over a year ago

ashford

Not in the slightest, wouldn’t put me off at all.

I hope she takes all the great comments here and uses them to boost her confidence.

Good luck to you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Me too hope she gets her confidence back real soon x good luck ??

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So my beautiful wife and I have been swinging for a few years now, first as a couple, then meeting alone which we prefer.

But my wife has MS and after a bad relapse now finds it difficult to walk without help. The rest of her body is just fine and works perfectly well. But she’s embarrassed by it and slowly stopped meeting. After some probing she said to me ‘ why would anyone want to meet me ‘when there are so many gorgeous able bodied ladies on Fab to choose from?’

It breaks my heart because she’s normally so confident and I want her to enjoy herself again.

So what I’m asking, so I can show her, would it put you off of meeting her?"

No. I hope all of those who also say they would happily meet boosts her self-confidence and self-esteem. Best wishes.

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