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Cheating
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship??  |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Because the majority of people here are not swingers...
Now start a thread on that ..... They are NOT swingers I tell you !"
I am... I swing my floppy bollocks to dry em after a shower........
cheeky biatch xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because the majority of people here are not swingers...
Now start a thread on that ..... They are NOT swingers I tell you !"
I beg to differ! I've seen Austin Powers and I know what swingings all about
I've seen a few skin flicks too on the subject.
In fact once I felt a ladies bum on the number 6 bus near Clacton when we were stood up and went over a pot hole.
Put that in yer pipe n smoke it!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because the majority of people here are not swingers...
Now start a thread on that ..... They are NOT swingers I tell you !"
I've long held the thought that there are two worlds colliding on here.
The 'Scene' and those who utilise an array of websites for NSA. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship?? "
Because they can........ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They join any site as I have been on a social network site (not Facebook) and most of the males on there that were married, were cheating on their wives so this being a swinging site seems to be irrelevant; its wherever there are females that they can chat up and hopefully persuade to meet them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How can you tell someone is cheating ?
I have been told I have a face that looks married ???
I said yes it has been married but its been single for the past 3 years ( seperated and now divorced . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A lot will depend on your definition of swinging, for me its about no strings attached sex with one or more people on a casual relaxed basis
My reasons for being here are I very much enjoy sex and new experiences, my reasons for doing it behind my wife's back are my own as are the consequences.
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship?? "
Cos they are horny and any hole will do...but wont visit a sex worker, which would be more honest, as they believe they should be liked, wanted, for themselves...basically they are looking for validation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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lol I'm not looking for validation, just some decent sex! 
Plus couple already find it hard to find the elusive single bi female, get rid of the individuals and they'd really struggle lol
Plus you'd be suprised at the amount of 'happily married and only play together couples' who actually send sneaky messages to meet alone   |
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I never judge each to there own one lady last year told me she had not any sex for eight months off her husband. Said at times she felt humiliated. As she spent a lot on new clothes lost weight etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship??
Cos they are horny and any hole will do...but wont visit a sex worker, which would be more honest, as they believe they should be liked, wanted, for themselves...basically they are looking for validation."
I dont understand how visiting a sex worker makes it more honest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So what if people cheat!
What harm are they doing you?
Don't like it? Ignore them and move on..."
If only some married men would take "will not meet married men" at face value, not push it, ignore and move on! |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Northants |
They are on here because the dating and singles sites are normally pay sites.. Can't have the little lady or man finding a line on the credit card statement!
"A lot will depend on your definition of swinging, for me its about no strings attached sex with one or more people on a casual relaxed basis."
If that was the case, everyone who goes to a pub or club to "score" would be a swinger!
Just because you are on a swingers site, doesn't make you a swinger! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never judge each to there own one lady last year told me she had not any sex for eight months off her husband. Said at times she felt humiliated. As she spent a lot on new clothes lost weight etc "
Eight months is a long time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
If that was the case, everyone who goes to a pub or club to "score" would be a swinger!
Just because you are on a swingers site, doesn't make you a swinger! "
Like I said it depends on what you define swinging as....I didn't claim to be a swinger heaven forbid I sully the term.... |
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By *z ThongzWoman
over a year ago
Lanarkshire |
In my opinion they are on this site because they believe women who swing to be easy, but how wrong can they be. They think swingers will shag anyone and have no morals or opinion on folks who cheat so we are a target site for them to get laid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For many It’s not as simple as just wanting to get laid outside of a relationship we all have our reasons for being on here. Yes for some it is purely as you have stated to get laid no matter what However for others it is due to necessity for many reason like a partners long term ill health , maybe they are stuck in a sexless marriage but for financial reasons cannot leave (children maybe).
To generalise on this wrong For instance if you want a moral code then the church or general society would condemn all of us for being on here why else would we be on here and not blatantly advertising ourselves in the local newspaper. So as far as I am concerned it is for each individual to judge him or herself not for others, who are the so called perfect ones on here.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In my opinion they are on this site because they believe women who swing to be easy, but how wrong can they be. They think swingers will shag anyone and have no morals or opinion on folks who cheat so we are a target site for them to get laid. "
Nice use of IMO to validate a sweeping statement
I am sure your opinion is valid for some but certainly not all. I know it doesn't cover me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They don't want to keep the playmate, just play. They are not leaving their partner, just playing away.
NSA springs to mind.
If people don't want a relationship, married playmates are perfect, if you can live with the low profile. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship??
Cos they are horny and any hole will do...but wont visit a sex worker, which would be more honest, as they believe they should be liked, wanted, for themselves...basically they are looking for validation."
Jem, I think I have asked this before but can't remember if you answered .
Why do you think going to an escort is acceptable if you are married but having sex for free isn't? |
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship??
Cos they are horny and any hole will do...but wont visit a sex worker, which would be more honest, as they believe they should be liked, wanted, for themselves...basically they are looking for validation.
Jem, I think I have asked this before but can't remember if you answered .
Why do you think going to an escort is acceptable if you are married but having sex for free isn't?"
excellent question.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Here's one to put the cat in with the pigeons
after two single male stalkers from here one of who required serious advice from my gorgeous man
we will only meet married men when we look for an other male to join us and for that matter married or attached ladies
Hides now x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here's one to put the cat in with the pigeons
after two single male stalkers from here one of who required serious advice from my gorgeous man
we will only meet married men when we look for an other male to join us and for that matter married or attached ladies
actually as i said in a previous thread i don't think that is uncommon lots of ladies and couples choose to meet only married people for a variety of reasons xxxxx
Hides now x"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Here's one to put the cat in with the pigeons
after two single male stalkers from here one of who required serious advice from my gorgeous man
we will only meet married men when we look for an other male to join us and for that matter married or attached ladies
Hides now x"
Well I just hope you don't get their wives/girlfriends stalking you then |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I never judge each to there own one lady last year told me she had not any sex for eight months off her husband. Said at times she felt humiliated. As she spent a lot on new clothes lost weight etc "
........ but then again not to not believe you, but how many times have we told people there are two sides to every story... with the truth being somewhere in the middle.... |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
it is probably quite easy to have fun with a married person..... as long as they are this anonymous person it is easy to say "not my problem, not my issue"
not so easy to say "not my problem, not my issue" when that person has a voice on the other end of a phone for example.... or heaven forbid is staring you face to face and looking you in the eye.....
see...if you now are specifically looking to meet a married person behind the other's back then you are complicit in that deception.....
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By *landleeCouple
over a year ago
near hull |
in my eyes singles that are attached and swing are not happy with there current partner and they get there kicks out of it this way as they aint got the balls excuse the pun to tell there partner |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"We havn't yet
but then how many check marital status when playing at a greedy girls night in clubs
or at parties
"
I don't go to greedy girl nights at clubs.. they are not really my thing so I couldn't comment, but when I go on clubs on mixed nights people have asked me, and I am honest and have nothing to hide.... I don't feel the need to lie to get my leg over.....
but in a sense.. you can only go on what people tell you.... if they then lie as least you can say "i didn't know.. i asked"
at the point where you find at the culpability has gone... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Our first single guy stalker after having been told no in several profiles and blocked in several profiles followed me and my mum round asda in such an obvious and intrusive way that mum started to get a bit worried and then when i walked away to get some milk came over and got hold of my arm while he talked at me
our second single guy stalker after having played a couple of times with us turned up at our front door and explained to my teenage daughter that he was my new boyfriend . as she and my gorgeous man were watching the rugby at the time this confused her to say the least .
So we then made two brilliant decisions the first being no more single guys or ladies as a sentence that starts does your other half know tends to get their attention
and we got a little two bed flat our Shag Pad to play in so now we never play at home .
Its also worth mentioning thaty gorgeous man finds married or attached ladies much more easy to find than i do married men |
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We have very strong _iews on cheating......its an absolute No No and if either of us were to cheat then it would be the end. We are a full swap couple and our reasons for this are simple...we get extremely turned on seeing each other sexually aroused and second we are pure filth. We get a maximum high out of sharing the way we give pleasure with others. We love the cheeky looks we exchange whilst being naughty. |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Northants |
I wonder how the opinions of the "It's not my problem" crew would change if they discovered their partner had cheated on them? Worse still, a number of times with strangers from a swingers site!
Easy to sit in front of a keyboard and say it wouldn't affect you, but in the reality of romantic life, there is nothing more gut wrenching than finding out that you have been decieved... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder how the opinions of the "It's not my problem" crew would change if they discovered their partner had cheated on them? Worse still, a number of times with strangers from a swingers site!
Easy to sit in front of a keyboard and say it wouldn't affect you, but in the reality of romantic life, there is nothing more gut wrenching than finding out that you have been decieved..."
been there done that.. Took my share of the blame..
I actually hadnt been decieved though as I pretty much knew... I have also been the one cheating.. although didnt get caught and got to play the OMG how dare you card..
Yes it was perhaps a little dishonest of me.. irony is now I wouldnt dream of cheating on my Master...  so I think if the relationship is right that people wouldnt cheat.. but that you have to be honest with people. As not every is made to be monogamous... and if you try to inforce that on someone its going to end in tears..
If I stopped wanting sex for whatever reason I certainly wouldnt expect my partner to not want it.
my ex wanted a woman that didnt want sex all the time.. So went and found one tha wasnt always in the mood.. and I met and found my Master.. all happy
Cali |
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By *ub bbwWoman
over a year ago
oldbury |
"in my eyes singles that are attached and swing are not happy with there current partner and they get there kicks out of it this way as they aint got the balls excuse the pun to tell there partner"
I have been on the receiving end of this my now ex who is still on this site cheated on me for the whole of the relationship we started swinging together and then he asked us to stop turned out he didnt. I found out and kicked him to the kerb but found this site and joined as i miss the lifestyle i have no doubt i have met married guys in clubs but do try not to meet attached guys any other way unless playing with their partner too. I have chatted to many and when i ask if they are married or attached just lessen the contact with them i am a swinger not someone for them to cheat on their wives of gfs with. I now play as part of a couple and he has the same opinion as me on it so we try our best to stick to genuine singles or couples |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"
Easy to sit in front of a keyboard and say it wouldn't affect you, but in the reality of romantic life, there is nothing more gut wrenching than finding out that you have been decieved..."
I think for some the " wouldn't affect me " is more they won't play with marrieds so it wouldn't affect them one way or another ( thats what we mean when we say it ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Easiest way is to swing with couples if we all did this there would be no need for singles in the scene married or otherwise.
"
You are so bang on right with this response, simples!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder how the opinions of the "It's not my problem" crew would change if they discovered their partner had cheated on them? Worse still, a number of times with strangers from a swingers site!
Easy to sit in front of a keyboard and say it wouldn't affect you, but in the reality of romantic life, there is nothing more gut wrenching than finding out that you have been decieved..."
Well obviously...
Having sex with someone who is cheating ... isn't my problem
Someone cheating on me ... is my problem |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Our first single guy stalker after having been told no in several profiles and blocked in several profiles followed me and my mum round asda in such an obvious and intrusive way that mum started to get a bit worried and then when i walked away to get some milk came over and got hold of my arm while he talked at me
our second single guy stalker after having played a couple of times with us turned up at our front door and explained to my teenage daughter that he was my new boyfriend . as she and my gorgeous man were watching the rugby at the time this confused her to say the least .
So we then made two brilliant decisions the first being no more single guys or ladies as a sentence that starts does your other half know tends to get their attention
and we got a little two bed flat our Shag Pad to play in so now we never play at home .
Its also worth mentioning thaty gorgeous man finds married or attached ladies much more easy to find than i do married men "
These stories sound so scarey. I'm delighted you've managed to solve your accommodation problems, away from home. We've never played at home and definitely won't be starting now. Thanks for sharing your experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Easiest way is to swing with couples if we all did this there would be no need for singles in the scene married or otherwise.
You are so bang on right with this response, simples!! "
Not entirely...we're a couple-we're together full time now but before that, while we were swinging together, one of us was married...
We were always upfront about it as we know how strongly some people feel about it, but it never stopped us getting meets...and a lot of the single people we met were married too...
We never sought relationship advice from the people we met and the state of their own relationships was entirely their own business and none of ours...it's not about judgement or morals and we're not Relate-it's casual, often one off sex with strangers |
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship?? "
Individual's join this site because couples want them too and because we can!
Remember some singles here might have been or are also couples here.
Outsides of relationships? Well let think, perhaps because they have minds of their own and they can for what ever personal reasons they have that aren't any bodies business but their own and we're not here to judge.
I have been approached by a lady out of a couple twice and have said no because I won't be part of something at least not knowingly.
I have no idea if I've been played by a fem of here or any other site but we can only ask the questions that seem relevant to meeting and taking care of your self..
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship?? "
the internet has changed the face of swinging |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single woman so I'm not cheating on anyone but I do not meet anyone who is cheating to be honest"
But how can you be sure of that. They may be lying to you too
There are lots of reasons why people are on this site and there seem to be different definitions of cheating |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a single woman so I'm not cheating on anyone but I do not meet anyone who is cheating to be honest
But how can you be sure of that. They may be lying to you too
There are lots of reasons why people are on this site and there seem to be different definitions of cheating "
... We meet single guys, some of which are no doubt married, there is little we can do to confirm this either way. But if a guy from a couple asked to meet and play alone, he'd be told to do one, unless his partner knows and gives her blessing, this would need confirming directly from her to us, by phone or after meeting in the flesh with them both and her giving her blessing. We never, ever, KNOWINGLY meet blokes that are either looking to or actually already cheating on their partners. |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Northants |
"the internet has changed the face of swinging"
Only on free sites! We are members of pay sites and although there are singles on them, they are not usually attached! If they were, their other halves would be bound at some point to find the payment details.
Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but in general we find it stands. There is also a much lower membership by singles of both sexes on pay sites, especially males.. Makes us wonder if they are just in it for a quick free shag! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For many It’s not as simple as just wanting to get laid outside of a relationship we all have our reasons for being on here. Yes for some it is purely as you have stated to get laid no matter what However for others it is due to necessity for many reason like a partners long term ill health , maybe they are stuck in a sexless marriage but for financial reasons cannot leave (children maybe).
To generalise on this wrong For instance if you want a moral code then the church or general society would condemn all of us for being on here why else would we be on here and not blatantly advertising ourselves in the local newspaper. So as far as I am concerned it is for each individual to judge him or herself not for others, who are the so called perfect ones on here.
"
Its still cheating no matter what the reason is |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"lol I'm not looking for validation, just some decent sex!
Plus couple already find it hard to find the elusive single bi female, get rid of the individuals and they'd really struggle lol
Plus you'd be suprised at the amount of 'happily married and only play together couples' who actually send sneaky messages to meet alone "
actually would be thats why the ladies that r happy with there partner still get loads of feckin hassle as they assume we all do xx |
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By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Northants |
"There are lots of reasons why people are on this site and there seem to be different definitions of cheating "
Wrong! Cheating is when you go behind your partners back for romantic or sexual gratification! No excuses, not reasons.. It is ALL cheating!
We also hear that "You would be surprised at the number of marrieds try to meet me alone" Great line to make you feel better, but in 13 years of Internet swinging, we have never had anyone do that!
Cheating is wrong, no if's, ands or buts... Put yourself in the place of the innocent party.. How would you feel? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"in my eyes singles that are attached and swing are not happy with there current partner and they get there kicks out of it this way as they aint got the balls excuse the pun to tell there partner"
 Totally agree |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plus you'd be suprised at the amount of 'happily married and only play together couples' who actually send sneaky messages to meet alone "
This does surprise me (Mrs). As a couple only play together and never alone the thrill for us is to see each otherbeing pleasured. The only thing we would feel by playing alone secretly is guilt and I'm sure that would be no fun at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"After reflecting on a previous post that I'd read I began to wonder why would a swingers site seemingly attract males or females who are on the site to play away from their unsuspecting partner? Surely one of the fundamental reasons why couples swing is to strengthen their relationship and add a bit of spice. It also steers the individuals away from cheating on their partners. I would have thought that swingers would have held stronger _iews on cheating. So why then do indivduals join this kind of site in order to get laid outside of a relationship?? "
Because lots of people are in dysfunctional marriages, which is usually the result of their own stupidity, and rather than having the courage to end them, they prefer to sneak about behind their partner's backs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many men would be surprised how many wives KNOW they cheat and leave them to it..
I know I knew when my ex was.. I was just waiting for him to tell me or something I could obviously catch him out on.
didnt bother me.. but then I was hardly an angel anyway.
Till my Master I have never once been faithful in any relationship ever...
Cali |
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