FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > "Straight men" and fully bi couples
"Straight men" and fully bi couples
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
Hello all. After having read an interesting thread, I decided to "grab the baton" and ask my own question, and one which I have thought periodically over the last couple of years... It may come across as controversial but I don't think it is meant to be anyhow! So, some of you fully bi couples state openly that you don't appreciate dishonest "straight" men. What if you get approached by a fellow man-woman couple whose male half is closeted bisexual and they only reveal it through private emails? Is the "straight" male half of a man-woman couple not as much of a liar as the "straight" single man? Is it the dishonesty that bothers or is it just deep down a matter of different "power dynamics", i.e. between two couples and between single male and a couple? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"  I love the quotation marks when someone types the word “straight” in the forums on Fab. It’s like nobody believes someone can be straight in here.  "
I'm only copying other people's written methods of expression 
In my particular case, the "" imply a fake, as opposed to the genuinely straight men |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"Seems a bit confrontational, you can be whatever you want, nothing beats discussions when you get to that point"
The point of my initial question wasn't how people describe themselves though....  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Some Men in those couples may go with the flow, if the other couple are attractive to them. It can also depend on the sort of play that takes place. So orally Bi play but no kissing or anal.
If some on here are, for the majority of the time straight, but occasionally don’t mind getting in on a same sex act, they’re entitled as all of us are, to label themselves as they choose.
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
In answer to your question, we wouldn't play with a couple if the male is lying about his sexuality.
We'll happily play with whoever as long as they are honest with us.
If we're going to be inviting people into our home then theres a level of implied trust there i.e. they aren't going to randomly turn up at 3pm on a Sunday when we are doing the kids dinner.
If they can't be honest about their sexuality then that trust doesn't exist. If they easily lie about that then what else are they happy to lie about. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"Some Men in those couples may go with the flow, if the other couple are attractive to them. It can also depend on the sort of play that takes place. So orally Bi play but no kissing or anal.
If some on here are, for the majority of the time straight, but occasionally don’t mind getting in on a same sex act, they’re entitled as all of us are, to label themselves as they choose.
"
Much appreciated for your feedback but, again, that wasn't THE point of my question....The point was to put it bluntly, as I should probably have done, what's the difference between a single male who lies about his sexuality and the male half of a man-woman couple who lies about his sexuality...I don't know how more eloquently I can put it...x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Some Men in those couples may go with the flow, if the other couple are attractive to them. It can also depend on the sort of play that takes place. So orally Bi play but no kissing or anal.
If some on here are, for the majority of the time straight, but occasionally don’t mind getting in on a same sex act, they’re entitled as all of us are, to label themselves as they choose.
Much appreciated for your feedback but, again, that wasn't THE point of my question....The point was to put it bluntly, as I should probably have done, what's the difference between a single male who lies about his sexuality and the male half of a man-woman couple who lies about his sexuality...I don't know how more eloquently I can put it...x"
Who’s saying he’s lying about his sexuality, You ?
In my example he sees himself as straight, just because occasionally he plays with another man in his mind it doesn’t make him bisexual. He’s just indulging in some same sex fun. If he’s in a couple or he’s a single man, it doesn’t matter.
You don’t have the right to tell anyone their sexuality or if they’re lying about it.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question "
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires.... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"In answer to your question, we wouldn't play with a couple if the male is lying about his sexuality.
We'll happily play with whoever as long as they are honest with us.
If we're going to be inviting people into our home then theres a level of implied trust there i.e. they aren't going to randomly turn up at 3pm on a Sunday when we are doing the kids dinner.
If they can't be honest about their sexuality then that trust doesn't exist. If they easily lie about that then what else are they happy to lie about."
Thanks; I'm glad you've taken my point... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires...."
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *akie32Man
over a year ago
winchester |
"In answer to your question, we wouldn't play with a couple if the male is lying about his sexuality.
We'll happily play with whoever as long as they are honest with us.
If we're going to be inviting people into our home then theres a level of implied trust there i.e. they aren't going to randomly turn up at 3pm on a Sunday when we are doing the kids dinner.
If they can't be honest about their sexuality then that trust doesn't exist. If they easily lie about that then what else are they happy to lie about."
this for us all the way |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ? "
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right?"
Well, this is probably more me jumping to hypotheses but, I did get your point about the frequency of unsolicited contacts by 'fake bi' single men. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right?"
No, that´s not what I meant.
I´m saying a closeted bi male is more likely to contact a bi couple than a closeted bi couple are to contact a bi male. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We've met loads of couples where both are bi but the man was listed as straight. Same with single men- straight profile but actually bi.
They are both dishonest but we understand why and don't care what profiles say.
Bi men in couples are likely to be forgiven by most because he's bringing pussy bait. 
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"We've met loads of couples where both are bi but the man was listed as straight. Same with single men- straight profile but actually bi.
They are both dishonest but we understand why and don't care what profiles say.
Bi men in couples are likely to be forgiven by most because he's bringing pussy bait.
"
Mmmm ok. Interesting point there! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right?
No, that´s not what I meant.
I´m saying a closeted bi male is more likely to contact a bi couple than a closeted bi couple are to contact a bi male."
Yep, I get it now. But how often does a closeted bi-male MF couple contact an openly fully bi MF couple? Could it be that it happens very often and the closeted bi male is forgiven because he brings "pussy bait" as a lady pointed out? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right?
No, that´s not what I meant.
I´m saying a closeted bi male is more likely to contact a bi couple than a closeted bi couple are to contact a bi male.
Yep, I get it now. But how often does a closeted bi-male MF couple contact an openly fully bi MF couple? Could it be that it happens very often and the closeted bi male is forgiven because he brings "pussy bait" as a lady pointed out? "
No idea, we don´t meet couples |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *_Marius OP Man
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"I´ll answer the question then
Of course there´s no difference. If you lie about your sexuality it makes no difference whether you´re single or part of a couple.
To be honest I´m not even sure how this can be a question
Point taken, but. Although I don't profess, by any means, to hold any exclusivity to the 'truth' out there, a bit of online observation has shown me that more often than not, it is single men who seem to be the target of the complaint of "fake bi", not so much the closeted bi males of man-woman couples. If some of you were to experience the swinging scene where I am right now, 9 out of 10 fully bisexual couples do not openly advertise their man-to-man desires....
But that´s logical isn´t it ? We get loads of guys contact us whose profile says they´re straight but when we point that out they tell us they´re really bi.
It´s unlikely that a couple with a profile that says that the male is straight (even if he is secretly bi) would contact a bi male profile and have that pointed out to them and say ´actually the male half is bi´. If that makes any sense ?
So, you're suggesting that closeted bi male MF couples would perhaps sooner contact an openly-bi single guy like me rather than an openly fully bi MF couple, if I understood right?
No, that´s not what I meant.
I´m saying a closeted bi male is more likely to contact a bi couple than a closeted bi couple are to contact a bi male.
Yep, I get it now. But how often does a closeted bi-male MF couple contact an openly fully bi MF couple? Could it be that it happens very often and the closeted bi male is forgiven because he brings "pussy bait" as a lady pointed out?
No idea, we don´t meet couples "
Ok fair enough |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
