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By *ucka39Man 36 weeks ago
Newcastle |
"If a couple have something on their list of interests which they only do with each other, should they make that clear in the description?"
Hi op
Sure, just like many have no kissing within their bio |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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"If a couple have something on their list of interests which they only do with each other, should they make that clear in the description?"
Just keep to what you feel comfortable doing with other people |
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"If a couple have something on their list of interests which they only do with each other, should they make that clear in the description?
Just keep to what you feel comfortable doing with other people "
That's my thoughts too. Lx |
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By *rpeggioCouple 36 weeks ago
Baughurst |
"If a couple have something on their list of interests which they only do with each other, should they make that clear in the description?
Give me an example "
Anal is a common one. And no, Couples are free to share as much or as little as they want in their profile narrative. It's called profile for a good reason, not called a contract or a menu. If it's there it means it's something of some interest to them, does not mean they want to do it every time with everyone. Or they are interested as a fantasy but not ready to do it perhaps. Discuss it. You see Anal in a profile if your interest, raise it up when chatting but don't take for granted in a meet they will be up for it (pun intended) without having discussed it.
More useful instead is what is not in the list of interests. For example, a couple that has deleted all swapping from Interests and has left only soft swinging is clear they will not full swap, or unlikely. |
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"If a couple have something on their list of interests which they only do with each other, should they make that clear in the description?
Give me an example
Anal is a common one. And no, Couples are free to share as much or as little as they want in their profile narrative. It's called profile for a good reason, not called a contract or a menu. If it's there it means it's something of some interest to them, does not mean they want to do it every time with everyone. Or they are interested as a fantasy but not ready to do it perhaps. Discuss it. You see Anal in a profile if your interest, raise it up when chatting but don't take for granted in a meet they will be up for it (pun intended) without having discussed it.
More useful instead is what is not in the list of interests. For example, a couple that has deleted all swapping from Interests and has left only soft swinging is clear they will not full swap, or unlikely."
It's not even anal. I understand when people only want to do that between themselves but sometimes its basic stuff like same-room swapping or kissing or making videos.
I disagree on two counts:
1. You only get one chance to make a first impression so if couples expect people to ask about each and every interest, that just won't happen.
2. Many people's interests were set up when they first started the account and haven't been updated. I had to go back in a few weeks ago and add in a few things which we like now and want to try with others. |
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By *rpeggioCouple 36 weeks ago
Baughurst |
I can see your point, OP, in your last message, about not querying every aspect of their Interests, but I assume you were looking at one or two in particular that are important to you as a couple or were the ones that prompt you to message them?
So now a bit confused as to what is exactly the problem/issue you see with couples that do not make clear in their description that something on their list of interests is only done with each other? How does that affect you or other couples? If you respond, feel free to use any of the examples you gave such as kissing or making videos.
[Does not make sense if a couple say that they only do same-room swapping with each other, so if that is a real example then that couple is just nuts, LOL] |
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By *rpeggioCouple 36 weeks ago
Baughurst |
"...2. Many people's interests were set up when they first started the account and haven't been updated. I had to go back in a few weeks ago and add in a few things which we like now and want to try with others."
LOL, that reminds me of a couple who wrote asking us to meet for separate room swapping. It was not long after we started swinging. We said not interested in separate room, we were only comfortable with same room, and the guy went ballistic, asking why was it then on our profile list of interests etc etc. I checked and he was right, it was there in our profile. I guess we never gave it much thought when we created our profile. So we deleted those things that were a NO back then, to avoid wasting others time, but we left some that are our interest but we decide when and with whom, so no we hope no one will assume it is a "menu" and we are meant to do them just because our profile says so.
On a side note ... still wondering why that couple only had "Separate Room swapping" in their profile as their only interest. Just that. No other interests. Can't figure out why. |
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By *rpeggioCouple 36 weeks ago
Baughurst |
"Apparently because I only have sex with My partner. And have sadomasochism with ladies and couples I'm not a swinger LOL."
Who says that you are not a swinger? 
You or others?
In my opinion, someone can be a swinger even if they are not having sex with a person that is not their partner. Or not having sex at all. What about stags and cuckolds? Are they not swingers then?
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"Just because it's on the list of interests doesn't mean we do it with everybody, some things require a great deal of trust so are reserved for a minority of play partners."
Totally agree with this.
Some things I wouldn't do with everyone but would with some.
Mrs |
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"Just because it's on the list of interests doesn't mean we do it with everybody, some things require a great deal of trust so are reserved for a minority of play partners.
Totally agree with this.
Some things I wouldn't do with everyone but would with some.
Mrs "
Which comes back to my point of - why bother putting things on interests if you will never do this with other people? Just curious. |
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"...2. Many people's interests were set up when they first started the account and haven't been updated. I had to go back in a few weeks ago and add in a few things which we like now and want to try with others.
LOL, that reminds me of a couple who wrote asking us to meet for separate room swapping. It was not long after we started swinging. We said not interested in separate room, we were only comfortable with same room, and the guy went ballistic, asking why was it then on our profile list of interests etc etc. I checked and he was right, it was there in our profile. I guess we never gave it much thought when we created our profile. So we deleted those things that were a NO back then, to avoid wasting others time, but we left some that are our interest but we decide when and with whom, so no we hope no one will assume it is a "menu" and we are meant to do them just because our profile says so.
On a side note ... still wondering why that couple only had "Separate Room swapping" in their profile as their only interest. Just that. No other interests. Can't figure out why."
That is a bit strange. We sometimes do that but not for vanilla meets. |
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"Just because it's on the list of interests doesn't mean we do it with everybody, some things require a great deal of trust so are reserved for a minority of play partners.
Totally agree with this.
Some things I wouldn't do with everyone but would with some.
Mrs
Which comes back to my point of - why bother putting things on interests if you will never do this with other people? Just curious."
As I said I will do it with some people just not all, the "never" was your word.
Mrs |
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