FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > I'd fuck you but....
I'd fuck you but....
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Find a reason why you wouldn't fuck the person above.
Remember it's just a bit of fun. Keep it friendly and humorous  |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I'm too tired |
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He's got a smiley face for a penis |
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By *andb69Couple 38 weeks ago
leeds |
"He's got a smiley face for a penis"
.......but he'd rather fuck a pile of donuts. |
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Too busy laughing at that joke |
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"Too busy laughing at that joke "
I don’t get it |
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"Well he just doesn’t get it"
can’t keep the pace!  |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I couldn’t fuck you as good as a Labour chancellor so not going to try |
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She's too busy kissing in the "Kiss Fuck Drink" thread |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Hes too busy |
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"Hes too busy"
He would show up my Dad bod! |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"Hes too busy
He would show up my Dad bod!"
He won't dress up as Penfold and keep shouting crumbs  |
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Being around you makes me insecure my boobs are too small 😢 |
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"Well he just doesn’t get it can’t keep the pace! "
Jokes are never funny are they've been explained haha |
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I was looking for a rhythmic dancer. |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Can't dance |
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[Removed by poster at 20/10/25 21:21:09] |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Can't make a post |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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He wears shades indoors |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"He wears shades indoors"
Has an issue with Shades 😎 |
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"He wears shades indoors
Has an issue with Shades 😎"
Way too shady |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Only wears red |
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I can't get past your stocking tops |
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"Won’t take his sunglasses off "
Can’t keep her legs on the floor |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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To Minxy... I'd cum just looking at your legs |
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"To Minxy... I'd cum just looking at your legs "
He's not playing the game correctly |
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"To Minxy... I'd cum just looking at your legs
He's not playing the game correctly "
Im reading the rules to the game. Give me a minute |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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There are rules? |
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"There are rules? "
Only if you can read |
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"There are rules?
Only if you can read "
Phew |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"His clown face sscared me away"
I speak broad Northern and you'd never get beyond me saying, 'Ey up me duck' |
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"I've got tit envy  "
I’m Still hungover. Give me another 24 hours  |
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"I've got tit envy "
There's a lot of puss to lick |
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"I've got tit envy
There's a lot of puss to lick "
Too sexy for us |
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You didn’t notice the puss above |
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"You didn’t notice the puss above "
Your cock is ghosting me |
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Comfy in bed don’t wanna leave it |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Too far |
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"Too far"
He's too sexy for my shirt
Too sexy it hurts |
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By *eturning MGMan 38 weeks ago
Mayo, Roscommon, Galway, Leitrim, Sligo....West Of Ireland |
"Bath half full only"
But for geography...so far away |
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By *heelerMan 38 weeks ago
Northants |
"Bath half full only"
I prefer the shower |
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"I got work to go to "
Work is more important for him |
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You have a red spot on your penis. You should get that checked out. |
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By *hil39Man 38 weeks ago
Dagenham |
"You have a red spot on your penis. You should get that checked out."
No but, lol |
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By *hybeamMan 38 weeks ago
Caterham |
I’d worry about somebody getting caught up in a crochet dress and there being a nasty accident |
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By *heelerMan 38 weeks ago
Northants |
"You have a red spot on your penis. You should get that checked out."
Its ok its lipstick |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Wears lipstick wrong |
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The clouds are blowing in the wrong direction |
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I'm booked in to the hairdresser's |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"I'm booked in to the hairdresser's "
I have an allergy to hairdressers and you may become contagious |
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"I'm booked in to the hairdresser's
I have an allergy to hairdressers and you may become contagious "
Your tits are too small 😉 😂 |
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"He doesn't like small tits "
My tits are too big |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Too close |
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"Too close"
You’re a gym bod and not a dad bod 💪 |
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"I'll get too distracted "
I can’t tie my shoelaces, let alone tie you up. |
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I can’t tie my shoelaces, let alone tie you up."
For him its only ever black or white.
I like to taste the rainbow |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Won't take his hat off |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"Won't take his hat off"
Too busy in gym xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"I've just eaten. "
She too stuffed  |
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I’m sunbathing and a little too hot! Xx |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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To busy tanning without my homemade cream |
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"To busy tanning without my homemade cream"
I’m painting my toenails |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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She'd have my eye out with those. |
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"She smells of nail varnish "
we are a couple
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"She smells of nail varnish we are a couple "
I see that😆😆😆 |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"Your sisters here now"
You refuse to dress as Hopkirk (deceased) |
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"Im always dressed as Hopkirk 💪"
I'm shaving my feet |
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"Im always dressed as Hopkirk 💪
I'm shaving my feet "
I’ve a shave phobia |
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You’ll have to beat me a wrestle first |
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"You’ll have to beat me a wrestle first "
Excess penis to the tune of 1 |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Abs too ripped |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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He's always in the gym 😂 |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"He's always in the gym 😂"
I doubt he likes reasonable sized boobs |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"He's always in the gym 😂
I doubt he likes reasonable sized boobs "
Scandalous remark.... |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"He's always in the gym 😂
I doubt he likes reasonable sized boobs
Scandalous remark...."
He's too busy being outraged. |
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"He's always in the gym 😂
I doubt he likes reasonable sized boobs
Scandalous remark....
He's too busy being outraged."
You don’t seem capable of getting fully dressed. 😉😂 |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I'm not up for a 69 |
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By *NMattMan 38 weeks ago
Northampton |
Don’t think I’d last long enough 😉😂 |
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"Don’t think I’d last long enough 😉😂"
You don’t pick up towels from the floor. 😂 |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Ur a guy |
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I have an allergy to ring donuts 🤣🤣🤣 |
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Normally I’d bum all of the above posters for the lolz but tonight is different as I am washing my feet in bath |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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But you have dirty feet |
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By *BraggiMan 38 weeks ago
Winchester/Witney |
We’d break the bed of my campervan |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Busy playing on phone |
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"He's too much of a brag  "
to young |
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By *ace400Man 38 weeks ago
near knock |
"He's too much of a brag to young"
I’m in Ireland |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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She licks everything |
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"She licks everything"
Too much of a hulk. |
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He cant keep his hands off himself |
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They are only looking for a woman to devour her 😢 |
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I’ve only just got rid of this boner |
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I just had my morning glory (no oasis puns) |
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"Mines already faded away..."
More of a goose fan. |
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"I can’t reach"
Im out of your age range |
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Feeling tired this morning to pump away |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"Feeling tired this morning to pump away "
I wouldn't last long |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 38 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"No buts, I would lol"
Being from Limerick,
You've got a nice dick,
But I can't fuck you,
Without a to do,
and that probably makes me thick |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Speaks in riddles |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Doesn't snuggle as good as me |
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"Doesn't snuggle as good as me "
Too many faces. |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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He just wants to snuggle |
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"He just wants to snuggle "
I’m not convincing enough as tammy |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I'm a little sore 🥵 |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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And trim the bush |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I'm busy making soup 😋 |
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By *ace400Man 38 weeks ago
near knock |
More interested in making soup then fucking |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"More interested in making soup then fucking"
I need a nana nap |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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Rest is for the weak |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"I like to rest"
You'd get no rest 😉 |
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Sorry, catching up on Emmerdale here ...  |
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I’m baking a cake, there’s been enough cream pies here… |
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Because I'm straight and it's a guy  |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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I'm busy enjoying my tea and biscuits |
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"I'm busy enjoying my tea and biscuits "
Steal his biscuits to nom on them myself |
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By *ing8435Man 38 weeks ago
Worcestershire |
way to many biscuit crumbs on his lap for my liking |
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"way to many biscuit crumbs on his lap for my liking"
Doesn't like to get messy |
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You wear too much red. Looks too dangerous... |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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You’re scared of danger |
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I’m stuck on the international space station |
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You're on the international space station |
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"You're on the international space station "
"I don't like you because you're dangerous." (Top Gun ) |
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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago
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"Because he’s a scorpion "
No because he's not the original archie  |
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