FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Oddly imbalanced?
Oddly imbalanced?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts? "
Only slightly related but I personally stop chatting to anyone who seems like they can't be bothered.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts? "
Don't contact them,seems they aren't what you are looking for. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's just like real life, but massively exaggerated. You've gotta do the chasing first, and you've gotta work hard. Then if your clever let the roles reverse.."
It just seems a bit lazy to me! I wouldn't expect a woman to come grovelling to me for a pat on the head! I would feel rude if I behaved like that (unless that was the role play...). |
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I am not particularly that manipulative and would hate to be involved with a game player on that level, chasing chased, not what it is all about for me. I honestly reply to any message, unless it is abusive. My reply may be curt or short as I may have a couple of other things on the go whilst replying ... I think you could expect that of anyone. Sometimes I go looking, but not so often these days. I have met some great people out there .... But I feel I can now spot the ones who are just messaging me as one of a couple of hundred they are sending out that day. One of the reasons women get so many messages is at they are bulk sent out by some people on here .... Yes, it's a numbers game, but multiple generic messages are not too too appealing. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts?
Don't contact them,seems they aren't what you are looking for."
That's what I do presently and then realised that if lots of men do the same then the aggressive profiles won't be seeing a representative same of men on here? |
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By *gNeMan
over a year ago
Harrogate |
"I am not particularly that manipulative and would hate to be involved with a game player on that level, chasing chased, not what it is all about for me. I honestly reply to any message, unless it is abusive. My reply may be curt or short as I may have a couple of other things on the go whilst replying ... I think you could expect that of anyone. Sometimes I go looking, but not so often these days. I have met some great people out there .... But I feel I can now spot the ones who are just messaging me as one of a couple of hundred they are sending out that day. One of the reasons women get so many messages is at they are bulk sent out by some people on here .... Yes, it's a numbers game, but multiple generic messages are not too too appealing."
It is a game though.. I don't play it anymore because as you imply it's shallow and unfulfilling. Women have a natural instinct, men don't. In general. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I see what you mean. I suppose that Is the trouble with this cyber world, people don't slow down and behave as they would in the real world. Bombard and move on... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here. |
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By *gNeMan
over a year ago
Harrogate |
"It's just like real life, but massively exaggerated. You've gotta do the chasing first, and you've gotta work hard. Then if your clever let the roles reverse..
It just seems a bit lazy to me! I wouldn't expect a woman to come grovelling to me for a pat on the head! I would feel rude if I behaved like that (unless that was the role play...)."
I'd agree with you. It's just how it is though. A young and attractive woman has a constant supply of potential suitors. You've got to make yourself stand out, be witty, a little bit cheeky, get them interested. Then just stop. Best to have a few lasses on the go like that.
They'll start coming to you then, trust me. |
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By *gNeMan
over a year ago
Harrogate |
"I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here."
Don't treat em mean. Just don't chase and pester and look desperate. It's pretty basic psychology. |
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By *ilacWoman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts? "
I don't consider my profile aggressive. Matter of fact maybe.
Some of the profiles I see on here with demands on from females and couples are crazy. I know everyone has their preferences but the way they are delivered with such hostility makes me wonder if and why they get any messages at all.
I picture them in a swinging club with their hand on their hip, finger wagging at some man while they scream and shout their list of demands. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here."
Sounds like a wise approach |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have read numerous profiles from women who are almost aggressive in their demands for men to make an effort in their messages and to show that they are worthy of engaging in conversation. Yet some of these people make no effort whatsoever when they reply, even if the reply is positive. I had always thought of swinging as a mutual experience between the participants. Although many women get a very high volume of messages, men that they might actually like might be put off by the aggressive profiles and they will just be left with a high volume of messages from desperate men. It might be better to block all men and just look around for those who fit the bill? Any thoughts?
I don't consider my profile aggressive. Matter of fact maybe.
Some of the profiles I see on here with demands on from females and couples are crazy. I know everyone has their preferences but the way they are delivered with such hostility makes me wonder if and why they get any messages at all.
I picture them in a swinging club with their hand on their hip, finger wagging at some man while they scream and shout their list of demands. "
That is exactly how it comes across! Quite odd! |
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I find the best approach is just to hit the forums a couple of times and never email first....
Maybe if they say something intriguing, but never email someone you want to have sex with.
The women who want you, will find you, apart from that just let the universe work its magic... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I picture them in a swinging club with their hand on their hip, finger wagging at some man while they scream and shout their list of demands. "
Sounds like married life to me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't waste your energy with these types of ladies !
There's alot of ladies on here and a lot of really decent friendly ones .
It's a myth about it been difficult for single guys on here and my best advice is don't lower your standards as well just for the sake of a shag . I've never met a woman off here yet that I wouldn't chat up in a pub !
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here.
Don't treat em mean. Just don't chase and pester and look desperate. It's pretty basic psychology. "
"Get them interested and then just stop" ( )
If it works for you, great.
A lot of women would just lose that initial interest though. I can't be bothered with game playing or chasing or similar. If someone looks like they're losing interest I just leave it there. |
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By *gNeMan
over a year ago
Harrogate |
"I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here.
Don't treat em mean. Just don't chase and pester and look desperate. It's pretty basic psychology.
"Get them interested and then just stop" ()
If it works for you, great.
A lot of women would just lose that initial interest though. I can't be bothered with game playing or chasing or similar. If someone looks like they're losing interest I just leave it there. "
True that's why you need to spread your nets wide. I'm no expert, but there's some fellas out there who can really get in a girls head. Even a total ice queen. Like I said before it's not nice, but it works. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree that there's no need for some of the rude and ranty profiles you see from some women and some couples. The notion that it's all a big game and you have to treat 'em mean once you've got them hooked seems spectacularly poor advice though.
I'd suggest avoiding any profiles you think sound aggressive or entitled, and note that there are plenty of men who do just fine on here by being themselves and meeting and having fun with the normal women, men, couples and everyone else on here.
Don't treat em mean. Just don't chase and pester and look desperate. It's pretty basic psychology.
"Get them interested and then just stop" ()
If it works for you, great.
A lot of women would just lose that initial interest though. I can't be bothered with game playing or chasing or similar. If someone looks like they're losing interest I just leave it there.
True that's why you need to spread your nets wide. I'm no expert, but there's some fellas out there who can really get in a girls head. Even a total ice queen. Like I said before it's not nice, but it works. "
Fucking an ice queen sounds like a recipe for frost bite and exactly what men who go for that sort of bullshit deserve. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
If you feel a woman isn't putting much effort into her replies she is probably not interested. I get the odd message I feel like replying to and sometimes the conversation flows, but sometimes they say something that just puts me off (along the lines of 'have you got a female mate you can bring along?') and I just lose interest.
It happens. Just move on and enjoy the chatty ones. |
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