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Bbw's

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i hate that term lol....i'm a large lady but feel like somebodys fetish !!

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By *ell of the ballWoman over a year ago

birmingham

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Does that mean we also get a VWE search too?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Does that mean we also get a VWE search too?"

Of course you can , anything the lady wishes

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By *ell of the ballWoman over a year ago

birmingham

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Does that mean we also get a VWE search too?

Of course you can , anything the lady wishes

And maybe a 'nice ass' search too lol

Actually it's a shame you can't select several likes when you do a search

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

yes you may have that too .

May I ask the lady a question?

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By *ell of the ballWoman over a year ago

birmingham

Of course and I know what's coming...it was a while ago and I can't remember why now lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

does make me wonder sometimes lol

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By *ell of the ballWoman over a year ago

birmingham

I confess I am a blocker for my sins...just makes life so much easier. We each have our own way of managing our profiles and I have read all the threads. Each to their own eh!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

fair enough , each to their own , rather you than me etc etc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not many do handle my charm very well , it can bring out a negative reaction lol

As for the thread bbw 's rule .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

can i get a swedish blonde search while we are at it ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"can i get a swedish blonde search while we are at it ?

no bugger off back to the chat room you lol

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By *habsMan over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Lol.. now now.. we can't all get what we want.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i hate that term lol....i'm a large lady but feel like somebodys fetish !!"

you hate being called a BIG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN?

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By *nnebellWoman over a year ago

somewhere

Well It depends how one defines oneself and if you dont like the fact you are larger than you want to be the BBW wont sit to well.

But hey we are what we are and I except that Im taller than most guys and I have a bum that eclipes the sun, moon and the stars. Thankfully the kinda guys who go for that are the kinda guys I love to go for to........ So me a happy bunny lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i hate that term lol....i'm a large lady but feel like somebodys fetish !!

you hate being called a BIG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN?

I don't!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well It depends how one defines oneself and if you dont like the fact you are larger than you want to be the BBW wont sit to well.

Very fair point about being larger than you want to be and not liking it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well It depends how one defines oneself and if you dont like the fact you are larger than you want to be the BBW wont sit to well.

Very fair point about being larger than you want to be and not liking it.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed."

?????????

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed.

?????????

whats the question?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed.

?????????

whats the question?"

I'm trying to figure out what your comment was all about.It came right after my last post so that's why I am asking.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Coincidence.......if you read the thread it will become clear xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Coincidence.......if you read the thread it will become clear xx"
We I have read it and i'm still none the wiser.So i'll just consider it none of my business.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm another who doesn't like the term BBW. It's not the Big, or the Woman bits. Some large ladies are indeed beautiful, but some obviously aren't.

I don't choose my lady playmates by their dress size, but I'm a sucker for a pretty face.

No doubt I'll get castigated for expressing my view, but it's the way I feel.

There will be ladies who look at guys from the same viewpoint, ie, WE and VWE.

There will be ladies who choose their playmates by the size of their cocks, and there will be some that don't like the classification for the same reasons as I don't like the term BBW.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you are right there....I don't class myself as beautiful even though I get some lovely compliments.

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By *hristopher WalksMan over a year ago

somewhere

"Well It depends how one defines oneself and if you dont like the fact you are larger than you want to be the BBW wont sit to well.

This is short muscular guy goes for that!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Coincidence.......if you read the thread it will become clear xx We I have read it and i'm still none the wiser.So i'll just consider it none of my business."

Yep..mind your business...lol...you know you get all hot under the collar.. on the topic of BBW...its your fav..and makes all the blood rush from your brain to ELSEWHERE!!!!

xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Coincidence.......if you read the thread it will become clear xx We I have read it and i'm still none the wiser.So i'll just consider it none of my business.

Yep..mind your business...lol...you know you get all hot under the collar.. on the topic of BBW...its your fav..and makes all the blood rush from your brain to ELSEWHERE!!!!

xxx"
LOLOL now behave .lol you don't out your best mate on a public forum.tsk tsk tsk.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

is that only in Darlaston? I was told about it last week

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By *obblybitsCouple over a year ago

huddersfield

what happened to just reading profiles???

I am not sure on the bbw name as I am well now more than bit more like fu%%ing huge and I wouldn't call my self overly beautiful either whilst were at it.

it is implies that people on message us because they want a bbw and do not care which one. iykwim

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

like a fetish!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"what happened to just reading profiles???

I am not sure on the bbw name as I am well now more than bit more like fu%%ing huge and I wouldn't call my self overly beautiful either whilst were at it.

it is implies that people on message us because they want a bbw and do not care which one. iykwim"

You lost me there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"like a fetish!!!!"
To be honest for me its not a fetish it's what admire .I have ever only had One slim girlfriend.I have always been attracted to a woman with curves and a big bum . I don't apologise for it thats just my thing.As I said not a fetish just what i'm attracted to.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

thats fair enough! i'm actually getting it now lol I've had loads of msgs about my size and finally took the plunge and met someone away from the club who couldn't get enough of every inch of my body

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed."

I assume that was directed at me .

If you noticed I never asked the question , why ?

But an answer was given and I respect that .

It does make you wonder though why a polite introduction message is greated with the dreaded 'b' word , still trying hard not to use that word in my post lol

Enough said off to pasteurs new .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"thats fair enough! i'm actually getting it now lol I've had loads of msgs about my size and finally took the plunge and met someone away from the club who couldn't get enough of every inch of my body

That's what I mean.There are actually genuine guys out there who admire a woman with a fuller figure and will prove it to the woman every way they can lol.Especailly concentrating on every inch of your body lol.Nice one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i find the term patronising if i'm honest...it's like saying: well, you're big so let's give you something to feel good about by calling you beautiful too.

they don't seem to have a similar for big guys....or, if they do, it's not so widely used.

bbw seems to be coming part of that language and, like 'fat, it seems it must be accepted whether welcomed or not.

I don't wish to be defined by my size nor my looks.. i'm just me and there's more about me inside than there is out.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i find the term patronising if i'm honest...it's like saying: well, you're big so let's give you something to feel good about by calling you beautiful too.

they don't seem to have a similar for big guys....or, if they do, it's not so widely used.

bbw seems to be coming part of that language and, like 'fat, it seems it must be accepted whether welcomed or not.

I don't wish to be defined by my size nor my looks.. i'm just me and there's more about me inside than there is out.

I don't think you can be defined by your size or looks.It has to start with some sort of physical attraction before even knowing you on the inside,and why can't a woman be big and beautiful ?

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By *andy muncherMan over a year ago

Nottingham

skinny minis kens and barbies ,we, vwe and bbw there all labels of some kind and patronising in some way and i think the bbw saying is here to stay

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i find the term patronising if i'm honest...it's like saying: well, you're big so let's give you something to feel good about by calling you beautiful too.

they don't seem to have a similar for big guys....or, if they do, it's not so widely used.

bbw seems to be coming part of that language and, like 'fat, it seems it must be accepted whether welcomed or not.

I don't wish to be defined by my size nor my looks.. i'm just me and there's more about me inside than there is out.

I don't think you can be defined by your size or looks.It has to start with some sort of physical attraction before even knowing you on the inside,and why can't a woman be big and beautiful ?"

I didn't say she couldn't be big and beautiful...just like a woman can be skinny and beautiful or average and beautiful...but i've never heard of a sbw or a abw...why must it be us larger sized girls that get the labels is my point!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Different strokes for different folks.

Im me and i come with the package of all me _obblybits and ass. like it or lump it.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

As far as I am aware the term BBW started in the states following some fuss and nonsense awareness thingymebob which had the slogan "big is beautiful"... it was all about promoting a feel good about yourself campaign, be proud of your size (like ya can hide it lol) and that plenty of people liked bigger women because of their size.

Anyway, that's where it started and the 'beautiful' refers to the 'big' being beautiful... not necessarily the woman.

So... you can be a fuck-pig ugly scuzzlebutt faced BBW, because it's the big which is beautiful.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

I like to think I am quite attractive ( though beautiful may be pushing it a little lol) but I am attractive because I just am, NOT because I happen to be big.

As it goes, I am actually quite a confident person and happy in my skin, so I don’t need to have a fluffy label to put across the fact that I am big, why not just say I am big? It is nothing to be ashamed of so why dress it up?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

Make sure you get to the buffet table early

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"As far as I am aware the term BBW started in the states following some fuss and nonsense awareness thingymebob which had the slogan "big is beautiful"... it was all about promoting a feel good about yourself campaign, be proud of your size (like ya can hide it lol) and that plenty of people liked bigger women because of their size.

Anyway, that's where it started and the 'beautiful' refers to the 'big' being beautiful... not necessarily the woman.

So... you can be a fuck-pig ugly scuzzlebutt faced BBW, because it's the big which is beautiful.

Phewwww

Im ok then

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

In this day and age and especially on sites like this... it's just a way of warning people to expect a fat bird rather than a statement of personal identity.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

Make sure you get to the buffet table early

Yeah… nothing worse than getting their after the vomit fingered anorexics and bulimics have been around it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

In this day and age and especially on sites like this... it's just a way of warning people to expect a fat bird rather than a statement of personal identity."

Oh I get that, I just wonder where it will stop, do I have to call myself as well as BBW,

BlindingBrunetteBabe, FuckableFiveFootFiver, WhoppingWhiteWoman,

BigBoobedBeauty,

BrowneyedBombshell ,

LonghairedLovely,

TenToedTemptress,

or would it be easier for them to just look and see if they find me attractive lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

In this day and age and especially on sites like this... it's just a way of warning people to expect a fat bird rather than a statement of personal identity.

Oh I get that, I just wonder where it will stop, do I have to call myself as well as BBW,

BlindingBrunetteBabe, FuckableFiveFootFiver, WhoppingWhiteWoman,

BigBoobedBeauty,

BrowneyedBombshell ,

LonghairedLovely,

TenToedTemptress,

or would it be easier for them to just look and see if they find me attractive lol"

hm...wondering if i should almost warm people that i don't live in my stockings and that if i'm aroused my eyes turn from blue to green then...would hate to disappoint...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I am a fan of the term as it gives most people an instant idea of body type and also confidence to a degree. No need for awkward angled pictures to make yourself seem thinner. And it isn't as crass as 'fat-bj-giver' that's for sure!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

In this day and age and especially on sites like this... it's just a way of warning people to expect a fat bird rather than a statement of personal identity."

thats exactly what i use it for and to be honest the second 'b' can mean anything you want it to - bubbly, brazen, bald

, bold, etc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

Make sure you get to the buffet table early

Not funny.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

Make sure you get to the buffet table early

i always miss the buffet

which is a shame cos after a couple of hours there i've worked up quite an appetite

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As a larger than average woman, I've never really understood the differences between "Curvy", "Large", "Ample", or "BBW".

Is there a dress size that determines the classification?

What one person sees about themselves, amother may not & some guys would consider anything above a size 12 to be large....

Meeting on cam or in person can only confirm how big is big!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well i am looking forward to the Bbw Xmas party at Chams so i wont have to search too far that day

Make sure you get to the buffet table early

Not funny.

Lmao...well me and the big guy are laughing...nearly got crushed in the stampede for the nibbles at the last bbw party....

xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well,if nothing else,this thread of mine has created a debate lol. Beginning to wonder if i should change my name on here now ? Or indeed my profile ?

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Please don't put people on the spot on the forums if they have you blocked by asking them why etc it isn't fair and not really allowed.

I assume that was directed at me .

If you noticed I never asked the question , why ?

But an answer was given and I respect that .

It does make you wonder though why a polite introduction message is greated with the dreaded 'b' word , still trying hard not to use that word in my post lol

Enough said off to pasteurs new .

Yes, as it was you contacting someone on the forum to find out why you were blocked.

But it also serves as a reminder for others, that whatever the reasoning you have, it isn't allowed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Does that mean we also get a VWE search too?"

i get enough messages as it is without an option for a VWE search....lol

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By *arambarMan over a year ago

swindon

"i get enough messages as it is without an option for a VWE search....lol"

Lucky you.

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By *nnebellWoman over a year ago

somewhere

"Well It depends how one defines oneself and if you dont like the fact you are larger than you want to be the BBW wont sit to well.

This is short muscular guy goes for that!

What exactly do you go for, the tall owman of the 1s who's bumms eclipse the moon, sun and star's ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

id like a 'bi' search option

and whilst im at it

id also like a hard back copy of 'pillars of the earth'

some more co co channel

and a really chilled glass of chablis please

i did say please!!!

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By *nnTonCouple over a year ago

birmingham

[Removed by poster at 31/10/10 07:15:22]

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By *nnTonCouple over a year ago

birmingham

Ref missschiefs comment above. I concur completely. When I moved my profile from my singles one to the current one, Sir was most insistant that my "body type" tag was changed from "large" as this differed from his own viewpoint. To use "vwe" would be a fair description of my bust- I buy tops and dresses in a size 16 to accommodate them but wear size 12 on the bottom ~& there are plenty of wobbly bits. Does this make me large, ample or curvy? How do I respond to the cpls profiles on here that say they won't meet above a size 14? or when it comes to it, those who prefer large or bbw?

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Though I dont object to the term BBW, I never use it to describe myself. I prefer to state curvy. I dont like determining my body size. I also feel that by adding the Beautiful in its kind of a softener for us, you know saying oh give them that tag cos deep down they know that the media is against them and will never picture girls as big as them. There is no term for any other womens body type so why do the big girls have to have one.

I have pics on my profile of me in just bra and knickers so im not hiding anything of my body, people can see what they are getting and they know that if they prefer a size 0 then they need to click off my profile

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Ref missschiefs comment above. I concur completely. When I moved my profile from my singles one to the current one, Sir was most insistant that my "body type" tag was changed from "large" as this differed from his own viewpoint. To use "vwe" would be a fair description of my bust- I buy tops and dresses in a size 16 to accommodate them but wear size 12 on the bottom ~& there are plenty of wobbly bits. Does this make me large, ample or curvy? How do I respond to the cpls profiles on here that say they won't meet above a size 14? or when it comes to it, those who prefer large or bbw?

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx"

I think this is a very good post.

I also think it's about time the website made a fully nude, honest, recent photo a requirement. We don't like fat people and I personally think there is not such thing as a BBW. But it is so incredibly open to personal interpretation that one persons fat is another persons gorgeous.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type").

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I dislike the term "fat people" too. At least BBW is not an offensive term at all. It would be like me saying I dont like skeletal people with shoulder blades sticking out or women with fried eggs that are loosely termed breasts - I wouldnt really be that offensive (im just typing those words to demonstrate how hurtful it can be).

Noone has the right to be rude about anyones looks on here, and the word fat is a derogatory term. Noone would dare put any racist word on here to describe someone so it ought to be stopped in relation to someones body size as well.

I do agree though that having pics that show someones size is a good thing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx

I think this is a very good post.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type")."

I for one would be totally against this open honest full length nude pic idea...my god the number peeps on this site might dwindle to nothing...lol...and then all that would be left would be the "gym Bods"..narcisists..and the young and perfect...HELP..!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mmmm yes you do have a point, lol id be off the site straight away.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx"

Yet oddly you use "Dom/sub or Domme / sub couples particularly welcome" in your profile... are they not labels?

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"... We don't like fat people and I personally think there is not such thing as a BBW. But it is so incredibly open to personal interpretation that one persons fat is another persons gorgeous.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type")."

I don't like ignorant c*nts but sadly you can't always tell that from a photo or by a handy 3 letter abbreviation on their profile.

Luckily for me I tend to talk to people and use msn etc to suss people out rather than relying on what their profile says in isolation.

Whilst I don't use the term BBW, I am sure you must agree it is handy if someone says 'bbw' on their profile so those who are not so fat-friendly know to move on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx

I think this is a very good post.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type")."

There's always something rather insulting in very post you make.

Nasty pair!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"... We don't like fat people and I personally think there is not such thing as a BBW. But it is so incredibly open to personal interpretation that one persons fat is another persons gorgeous.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type").

I don't like ignorant c*nts but sadly you can't always tell that from a photo or by a handy 3 letter abbreviation on their profile.

Luckily for me I tend to talk to people and use msn etc to suss people out rather than relying on what their profile says in isolation.

Whilst I don't use the term BBW, I am sure you must agree it is handy if someone says 'bbw' on their profile so those who are not so fat-friendly know to move on.

Well said Polo...your post will probably go over their heads!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

The sub side of me is strong in my desire to please and I am constantly nervous of appearing to give misleading impressions or descriptors.

I am me (and his). Do i need labels?

T xxx

I think this is a very good post.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type")."

i guess that why we are lucky that one mans kate moss is anothers dawn french!!

i appreciate that everyone has their own opinions and choices with who they want to play with and that is why i put bbw on my profile heading, dont like fattie - move on!!

who is going to be able to say that these 'honest' photos are just that?? should Fab hire a troop of photographers to go round to each members house to take the pic??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think Fab would also need to hire scholars to add to their team of David Bailey's to check profiles as I'm beginning to wonder about the veracity of all these "intelligent, educated" profiles here!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think this is a very good post.

The only way to circumvent this is honest photography (and yes before someone bulldozes in, of course I realise it's not reliable - but it is more reliable than "body type")."

you don't like fat people or don't get pleasure from their bodies?

there is such a wide chasm of difference between the two...and I'm not sure how you manage in society if you dislike fat people in general.

also, a cautionary warning would be to not try offend people so readily and consider your words before speaking.

In response to the rest of your comment, I have no desire to see page upon page of naked men..it would put me off, besides we would additionally have to insist that there is a ban on folk who are so easily and openly judgemental as it would deter others from using the site and, unfortunately, other than the forum, ignorance isn't something you can easily detect from a profile.

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By *havenangel1Couple over a year ago

Worcester

I have to say that i am someone who is a little self concious about missleading people when it comes to my size so i do use the words BBW on my profile for that purpose. However i learnt through swinging and this site that peoples attitudes towards others and personalities are equally as important as their looks/body size.

Don't get me wrong we all have our preferances and looks do go along way in making that decission wether to play or not but the type of person someone is can make them equally attractive in my personal oppion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Whilst I dont use the term BBW for myself, I will use the words curvy and I have pics of me in bra and knickers so you really cannot fail to notice that im not tiny in body. I personally would never make a rude personal comment about someones looks or body, I might not fancy them but I would find a way around declining their offer of a meet. Similarly I would hope that someone would look at my pics and if Im not to their liking just say no thanks. Ive never had a comment saying, you're too fat for us, and if I did I know I would be offended by it

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well,can I have some suggestions for a new name please ?

Sensible ones only though

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

A woman?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well that's one to start with.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Am only having that naked piccy taken if Gok gives me a makeover first and tells me how fabulous my bangers are!

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By *lack_BoltMan over a year ago

oxford

This is one of the best threads on BBWs I've read for quite some time. So couldn't resist making one or two comments.

Firstly - I find it interesting that women are so ambiguous about the term BBW when it is they who created the term in the first. Granted when analysed closely it may not be wholely accurate, but it provides a convenient label so that no one is surprised.

Secondly - once the term is in use the definition becomes lost and is reduced to a mnemonic, for instance I'm a black male. Actually I'm a dark brown skinned male but "black" provides the convenient tag.

Thirdly - it saddens me that 'the larger ladies' still feel the need to defend themselves. Most men, left to their own devices, will generally move towards the curvier figure. However just as the media tries to convince women that 'thin is best', there is growing pressure for men to subscribe to the same mantra.

Fourthly - the most disturbing thing of all is what's considered to be a normal size now. Not that long ago what was 'normal' or 'average' is seen as fat, chubby or even obese. And what is now seen as normal would have been seen as anorexic.

Finally - although I express an interest in BBWs ultimately it is personality for me. Just like the woman who say they do, or don't prefer black men, some of which are BBWs, I have a preference but it is not exclusive and the term BBW merely helps to explain what I'm trying to say.

xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

xxxxx"

i never really get that comment

Ok granted many years ago women was a lot slimmer but thats because portion sizes was smaller, they scrubbed floors, washed clothes by hand etc now day we are a lazy nation with machines that do everything for us

A size 16 is a size 16 be it now or 60 years ago

all because a size 16 is now seen as average that does not mean its no longer big it just means more people are big

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I cant quite understand how someone who is proud of who they are (size and looks) can get offended by being called a BBW? You are Big, Beautiful and you are a Woman and you are proud of it, otherwise you wouldnt be offended by being called fat (which I agree is a hurtful word).

If you dont consider yourself big enough to be BBW, just call yourself curvy. Its quite easy really!

And as for "can I just be called 'woman'" - yeah right. And we wont expect the men to tell us if they are tall, short, hairy, smooth, bearded, not bearded, muscled, skinny, fat, thin.

Oh and by the way, to the poster who said calling someone 'fat' is wrong in the same way that racist terms arent allowed. While fat is not ok, it is and will never be on a par with racism. That is a ridiculous comparison.

People will ALWAYS make a comment / impression based on your looks. If you dont want people passing judgement on you, then what the hell are you doing putting your most personally sensitive body issue out for all to peruse on a public forum??

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

And as for "can I just be called 'woman'" - yeah right. And we wont expect the men to tell us if they are tall, short, hairy, smooth, bearded, not bearded, muscled, skinny, fat, thin.

I meant in general life. I didn't mean to hide any descriptions of myself on a swingers site.

I am a large lady but wouldn't use the BBW tag...I am a woman who happens to be large.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

into a research into bullying, The top four most hateful names were identified as the unimaginative "fatty", "fat", "lard arse" and "fat b*****d"...all related to folk who are overweight.

racism, whilst ignorant, has apparently swung it's heels and those that rate highest on being discriminated against is the Mr Average white 40(ish)yr old male.

THAT is not ridiculous, that's fact

And I use this site to get fucked...not judged...otherwise let's call it doIlookbigonthis.com

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

In this day and age and especially on sites like this... it's just a way of warning people to expect a fat bird rather than a statement of personal identity.

Oh I get that, I just wonder where it will stop, do I have to call myself as well as BBW,

BlindingBrunetteBabe, FuckableFiveFootFiver, WhoppingWhiteWoman,

BigBoobedBeauty,

BrowneyedBombshell ,

LonghairedLovely,

TenToedTemptress,

or would it be easier for them to just look and see if they find me attractive lol"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can you explain the comment above please. Why is a racist remark far worse than calling someone an abusive name. Its still about prejudice, its still about putting someone down because they dont conform, it still belittles someone and it hurts them. A remark hurts whoever it is aimed at. I dont feel you can say one comment is worse than another derogatory comment - its a sensitive issue to whoever its aimed at.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

I like to think I am quite attractive ( though beautiful may be pushing it a little lol) but I am attractive because I just am, NOT because I happen to be big.

So your saying you don't want people to label you and not pick by category like BBW, but you have criteria on your profile like 18-55

I will be 56 later this year and therefore outside the criteria you are looking for, many people already are, so I guess your going to update your age criteria to 18-99 so as not to categorise anyone and pre-judge them as being someone you would not like to meet because they are in a certain group like slim, BBW, ample, xx years old, smokers, non-smokers.

The term BBW is being avidly discussed and liked by some and not by others but you cannot expect people not to care about size, age, race, creed, colour, height, sexuality, gender etc.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And would everyone with a fuller figure please note that being called skinny and rakelike is as offensive to some as being called fat or gross

Slim people have feelings too and although I am an exception to the rule slim people can also be beautifull with out being Big

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Eh?! Being 56 is an age, not a label! It's a fact of life...

There's no label for being 56

For being Overweight there are many labels, the point is 'some of us' don't like to be labelled.

..and I agree about your other point, my friend has to buy childrens clothes she is so (naturally) small (she eats like a horse!)...and she hates it when people negate her right to have a "feeling heavy" day or come out with things like "I wish I had your metabolism"......she actually is not comfortable with her size and doesn't like it being a point of discussion either

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By *ummy mummyWoman over a year ago

southampton-ish

"And would everyone with a fuller figure please note that being called skinny and rakelike is as offensive to some as being called fat or gross

Slim people have feelings too and although I am an exception to the rule slim people can also be beautifull with out being Big

noted...but not everyone with a fuller figure calls slim people skinny or rake like...and why just direct this at fuller figured people? average sized people can also comment on people who may be slimmer than them...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Eh?! Being 56 is an age, not a label! It's a fact of life...

There's no label for being 56

For being Overweight there are many labels, the point is 'some of us' don't like to be labelled.

Was that added to confuse the issue. This thread is going way over my head .

What point are you trying to make

I give you one thing your persistant on whatever it is your trying to say.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Was that added to confuse the issue. This thread is going way over my head .

What point are you trying to make

I give you one thing your persistant on whatever it is your trying to say.

you're not the only one confused....

don't know if you understand how an open debate works, but one person poses an argument and the other counter-argues.

sometimes...the points raised are not enough to sway either side so it can often continue

simple really

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 03/11/10 21:00:58]

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"I am not keen in the term BBW to be honest. I am not defined by my dress size any more than I am defined by the hair colour or my shoe size. So why should I be labelled solely on my dress size?

I like to think I am quite attractive ( though beautiful may be pushing it a little lol) but I am attractive because I just am, NOT because I happen to be big.

So your saying you don't want people to label you and not pick by category like BBW, but you have criteria on your profile like 18-55

The term BBW is being avidly discussed and liked by some and not by others but you cannot expect people not to care about size, age, race, creed, colour, height, sexuality, gender etc."

To be fair Jed, I don't think she said she didn't want to describe herself at all, just not with the term BBW.

I have said up there more or less the same thing, I would rather say large than BBW.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just a few observations I've made while viewing this thread.

If someone is Afro Caribbean chances are they will be described as black.

Not just by others but also by themselves.

So,personally,if I described an Afro Caribbean person as being black it's not that I'm being racist.

Likewise if someone is considerably heavier/larger than they should be for their height it's going to be down to one of two things muscle or fat.

Chances are,it will be down to fat.

That being the case how can it be any more insulting to call someone fat than to call them black, bald, short, tall or thin.

Its not derogatory its just a honest observation.

Also there have been threads complaining about people describing themselves as "attractive" or "sexy" etc on their profiles.

While we agree that it's down to others to make that decision and all subjective, why is it seen as being O.K for big/fat women to call themselves "beautiful"?

You can't make fish of one and fowl of another.

And while "BBW's" are constantly saying how happy and content they are, it never really comes across that way on the many related threads on the subject.

There's a lot of treading on eggs when these threads come up.

As I said, they're just observations.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sorry, but being fat (and it is fat, it isn't additional bones) is a choice. If you don't like people having an opinion on a lifestyle choice, then you have 2 options - change your choice or put up with it.

If you are fat, you are fat. Simple as that. And that is meant factually, not as a putdown.

A tall person can't suddenly not accept being called tall.

Maybe some people are slightly too sensitive at being called fat and immediately assume it's meant negatively, whereas some people may just mean that you are fat. Here's an idea, if you don't like people making a factual comment on something you have chosen to be, do something about it. You can't force people to change their opinion just because you don't like the word they use - especially when the word they use is an anatomically correct description of what constitutes the vast majority if your body mass!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sorry, but being fat (and it is fat, it isn't additional bones) is a choice. If you don't like people having an opinion on a lifestyle choice, then you have 2 options - change your choice or put up with it.

If you are fat, you are fat. Simple as that. And that is meant factually, not as a putdown.

A tall person can't suddenly not accept being called tall.

well said!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you are fat, you are fat. Simple as that. And that is meant factually, not as a putdown.

A tall person can't suddenly not accept being called tall.

well, if you want to be anatomically correct....you should call overweight and large people fat and all the other things that they are made up of?

otherwise even if a person weighs 8 stone we should call them fat....as even at 8 stone there is fat on the body...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well, if you want to be anatomically correct....you should call overweight and large people fat and all the other things that they are made up of?

otherwise even if a person weighs 8 stone we should call them fat....as even at 8 stone there is fat on the body..."

Ok, I shall refer to fat people as "people with disproportionate amounts of fat in comparison to the national norm". Does that make it better?

Oh and by the way, I am very soft and curvy and would hate to lose weight and lose my curves!

Im not anti-fat, I just cant be arsed with trying to wrap things up in nicey nicey terms and avoid what they really are!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This argument is now getting childish imo

you are what you are, no matter how you dress it up or down. some people dont like the word fat or bbw some people cant see what is wrong with them.

If you dont like the words then i would suggest putting this on your profile or mention it early on when you are in contact with potential play mates.

As for the use of these words in general/forums/chat you cant please everyone, just learn to realise that when someone uses the words they might not see it in the same way as you do.

agreed if it is said in an insulting manner, just like any other word then its out of order and should be reported.

kat x x x

(a very happy fat bbw gobby bird

)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This argument is now getting childish imo

you are what you are, no matter how you dress it up or down. some people dont like the word fat or bbw some people cant see what is wrong with them.

If you dont like the words then i would suggest putting this on your profile or mention it early on when you are in contact with potential play mates.

As for the use of these words in general/forums/chat you cant please everyone, just learn to realise that when someone uses the words they might not see it in the same way as you do.

agreed if it is said in an insulting manner, just like any other word then its out of order and should be reported.

kat x x x

(a very happy fat bbw gobby bird

Bravo.

A voice of reason

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This argument is now getting childish imo

you are what you are, no matter how you dress it up or down. some people dont like the word fat or bbw some people cant see what is wrong with them.

If you dont like the words then i would suggest putting this on your profile or mention it early on when you are in contact with potential play mates.

As for the use of these words in general/forums/chat you cant please everyone, just learn to realise that when someone uses the words they might not see it in the same way as you do.

agreed if it is said in an insulting manner, just like any other word then its out of order and should be reported.

kat x x x

(a very happy fat bbw gobby bird

)

Bravo.

A voice of reason

people used to say plump, that's kinda cute.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Im not anti-fat, I just cant be arsed with trying to wrap things up in nicey nicey terms and avoid what they really are!"

Says the 'curvy' person

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

ha ha says a portly gent

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Says the 'curvy' person

Curvy with a lovely fat arse I will have you know!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it all depends how you look at it, im fat and i dont mind the word fat because thats what i am, you can wrap it in a silk bow and call me names like curvy, voluptuous, real woman etc and all the other names that was made up to make us feel better but at the end of the day it all means the same....fat

I also think it depends on how the word is usaed, if someone called me a fat cow i would take offence because its men to hurt and offend but when i go to the doctors and he tells me im to fat thats not offensive because its not ment to offend its ment in a matter of fact way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just a few observations I've made while viewing this thread.

If someone is Afro Caribbean chances are they will be described as black.

Not just by others but also by themselves.

So,personally,if I described an Afro Caribbean person as being black it's not that I'm being racist.

Likewise if someone is considerably heavier/larger than they should be for their height it's going to be down to one of two things muscle or fat.

Chances are,it will be down to fat.

That being the case how can it be any more insulting to call someone fat than to call them black, bald, short, tall or thin.

Its not derogatory its just a honest observation.

Also there have been threads complaining about people describing themselves as "attractive" or "sexy" etc on their profiles.

While we agree that it's down to others to make that decision and all subjective, why is it seen as being O.K for big/fat women to call themselves "beautiful"?

You can't make fish of one and fowl of another.

And while "BBW's" are constantly saying how happy and content they are, it never really comes across that way on the many related threads on the subject.

There's a lot of treading on eggs when these threads come up.

As I said, they're just observations.

XX"

i totally agree with you, i think thats the point i was making above, its not the word its the meaning behind it

if someone calls you fat or black etc in a nasty way to try and hurt you then thats offensive, if its said in just an observatiuon way its not

lots of women do say they are fat and happy but then so defensive on such threads, if your really happy why not just say.....hey im fat so what

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

It's simple really... if people think it's OK and totally not offensive to call someone fat... I dare you to walk up to a porker in the supermarket and say "excuse me, you are fat aren't you" and see what happens

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Why on earth do you need a search? The majority of swingers tend to be full of figure.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's simple really... if people think it's OK and totally not offensive to call someone fat... I dare you to walk up to a porker in the supermarket and say "excuse me, you are fat aren't you" and see what happens

but you wouldnt do that would you lol no more than you would want upto a black person out the blue and say hey your black

i think it has to tie in with the conversation lol

tell you what tho if you stand behind me and catch me when they punch me i'll do it lmao

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"This argument is now getting childish imo

you are what you are, no matter how you dress it up or down. some people dont like the word fat or bbw some people cant see what is wrong with them.

If you dont like the words then i would suggest putting this on your profile or mention it early on when you are in contact with potential play mates.

As for the use of these words in general/forums/chat you cant please everyone, just learn to realise that when someone uses the words they might not see it in the same way as you do.

agreed if it is said in an insulting manner, just like any other word then its out of order and should be reported.

kat x x x

(a very happy fat bbw gobby bird

)

Bravo.

A voice of reason

people used to say plump, that's kinda cute."

Voloptuos *spellcheck*

lol

is a nice word too

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

but you wouldnt do that would you lol no more than you would want upto a black person out the blue and say hey your black

i think it has to tie in with the conversation lol

tell you what tho if you stand behind me and catch me when they punch me i'll do it lmao"

Not reccomended , eh ?

Make sure you pick a strong person to stand behind you lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just a few observations I've made while viewing this thread.

If someone is Afro Caribbean chances are they will be described as black.

Not just by others but also by themselves.

So,personally,if I described an Afro Caribbean person as being black it's not that I'm being racist.

Likewise if someone is considerably heavier/larger than they should be for their height it's going to be down to one of two things muscle or fat.

Chances are,it will be down to fat.

That being the case how can it be any more insulting to call someone fat than to call them black, bald, short, tall or thin.

Its not derogatory its just a honest observation.

Also there have been threads complaining about people describing themselves as "attractive" or "sexy" etc on their profiles.

While we agree that it's down to others to make that decision and all subjective, why is it seen as being O.K for big/fat women to call themselves "beautiful"?

You can't make fish of one and fowl of another.

And while "BBW's" are constantly saying how happy and content they are, it never really comes across that way on the many related threads on the subject.

There's a lot of treading on eggs when these threads come up.

As I said, they're just observations.

XX"

This is a very well written post, but....

At what point does a socially accepted word or label become unacceptable? Does it not start to change at the point where a person being labelled finds the use of a word offensive?

To expand your example, I am afro caribbean. Had we been having this conversation at the beginning of the last century the words used to describe me would have been socially acceptable to many at the time (even to some other black people) but I would find the same words today extremely offensive. Some would call it progress, others would argue political correctness. All I can say is that it changed because some people found the words offensive and in time the majority agreed.

At one time homosexuality was (wrongly) seen as a lifestyle choice and some of the words used in the past to label this group are today widely accepted as being offensive........your probably getting my drift.

Whether I place this in the same category as the above examples is secondary, the fact is some people find the use of the word 'fat' in describing them as offensive. That leads me to question my future use of the word. I am not overweight, I don't need to agree or understand why the word is offensive or question the sensitivity level of the individual offended. I just need to be aware that used in certain context it can cause hurt. My choice is either to ignore this fact and use it anyway or choose not to hurt. I choose not to hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Blackspice: I salute you!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There is a difference though between a derogatory word being accepted as mean and its used being eradicated and a descriptively correct word being used and then its use being curtailed because someone suddenly taking a dislike to being called what they actually are!

Socially acceptable and factually correct are two very different things. Socially acceptable is public opinion,and that changes. Someone being fat is not public opinion. They are fat or they are not fat. Thats medical fact. Thats anatomical fact. Thats a simple straightforward truth.

An opinion changing will not suddenly change the physiological make up of someones body!

We all decide never to use the word fat again - are you suddenly not fat? Are you suddenly not made up of a disproportionate amount of fat? NO! You are still fat with an excess amount of fat on you!

If you are fat, you are fat. There is not other way of looking at it. It being said in a nice way or a nasty way does not take away the fact that you are fat.

Fat used as a hurtful term is wrong.

Fat used as an accurate description is not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Voloptuos *spellcheck*

lol

is a nice word too

Oh no he's at it again - its the spell police - stop stop please stop it, take a deep breath before you reach for the keyboard to correct someone's spelling, its only a forum, not a dissertation, most people have been at work all day and cant be bothered to go back and correct a long thread - and please dont go through this post looking for spelling mistakes or punctuation

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There is a difference though between a derogatory word being accepted as mean and its used being eradicated and a descriptively correct word being used and then its use being curtailed because someone suddenly taking a dislike to being called what they actually are!

An opinion changing will not suddenly change the physiological make up of someones body!

We all decide never to use the word fat again - are you suddenly not fat? Are you suddenly not made up of a disproportionate amount of fat? NO! You are still fat with an excess amount of fat on you!

If you are fat, you are fat. There is not other way of looking at it. It being said in a nice way or a nasty way does not take away the fact that you are fat.

Fat used as a hurtful term is wrong.

Fat used as an accurate description is not."

I'm here trying to understand the purpose of your post.

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By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Voloptuos *spellcheck*

lol

is a nice word too

Actually, in this case I don't think he was.

The word he used wasn't in the post he quoted, so I think he was acknowledging that his suggestion of yet another synonym for the larger sizes was possibly misspelt.

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By *lack_BoltMan over a year ago

oxford

Mmmmmmm? In answer to the OP. I think what you suggest is fundamentally a good idea, as well as all the other variants put forward but others (albeit jokingly). Many other sites already do this and it is generally seen as good thing.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line. Who cares? This is recreational sex and should in theory be impersonal. We are a larger couple. We have broken 2 double beds through vigerous play, We get plenty of action whether fat, portly, stout, big, curvy or BBW. We answer to all those titles in-between pie consumption. No matter where we sit in our house we are always sitting next to someone. On occasion we suffer "belly jam" and can be stuck for days. We're big fun adventurous people and we say so early on. Whats the point in hanging a tag on us? Lets just have fun if big is your bag?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well what can i say that hasn;t already been said by the lovely polo

ummmmmm

nothing she says it so well n saves my typing

so i'll just shamelessly plug the BBW bash at chams on sunday 12th dec

the place will be full of fat birds

(oh no she didn't did she) that wibble n wobble and if you do find this beautifull then send us a pm to go on the guest list cause it promises to be a wonderfully wobble filled night

ladies of the slimmer variety are very welcome too all we ask is just come if your not offended by rolls n wobbles

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Great plug bouncy !!

For me I don't give a toss, other than I find the BBW patronising , I would rather just call myself , big, large woman...I am not sure I have ever said I am a fat woman to a potential meet but thats because the word is normally flitted about when people are using it to get at someone....but I am a fat woman none the less.

I think it all just boils down to respect of other peoples feelings.

If you don't give a shit about anyones feelings then no doubt calling people in a derogatry way, whatever the description, be that fat, skinny,etc etc will make your life richer.

for the rest of us who don't want to upset anyone deliberatly, we can carry on having a bit of tact.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"I adore spending time with a fuller figured lady... Can there not be a search on here to make life easier for their admirers to find them ?

Bet you didn't realise your request would end up a huge big debate did you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"i hate that term lol....i'm a large lady but feel like somebodys fetish !!"

sometimes i hate having a message and it mentioned BBW

sorry i hate being called it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Voloptuos *spellcheck*

lol

is a nice word too

Actually, in this case I don't think he was.

The word he used wasn't in the post he quoted, so I think he was acknowledging that his suggestion of yet another synonym for the larger sizes was possibly misspelt.

"
That is correct . Even I can make spelling mistakes .

Proves we are all human

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By *hite_lightningWoman over a year ago

Oxford

If you are fat, you are fat. Simple as that. And that is meant factually, not as a putdown.A tall person can't suddenly not accept being called tall.

Maybe some people are slightly too sensitive at being called fat and immediately assume it's meant negatively, whereas some people may just mean that you are fat.

I was directed to this post by my other half Black_bolt... and have read it carefully from beginning to end before replying. Though I do agree that when you are fat, you're fat. I do not agree that it is a choice all the time.

I have an auto immune illness which stops me from losing weight. I have always been a big girl, and due to this will stay a big girl.. or fat. I'm not bothered by this, but it's just me not being bothered. All through my life I have come across people who are bothered by my size, but that is their opinion.

Everybody IS entitled to an opinion, or free speech, but when it comes to "putting down" another person, I don't like it. I would never judge or label someone by their appearance.

It says on my profile that I prefer black men, but I don't specify a certain type of man, all I ask for is that someone can make me laugh. And being bi, that means ladies too. To me, a person's attractiveness is in their personality, anything else is a bonus.

Please don't say that its a choice being fat, when it is not always.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Please don't say that its a choice being fat, when it is not always. "

Can you explain this further pls as i dont understand, i can understand how medical reasons can make you gain weight but its a personal choice as to weather you keep that weight.

Kat

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

steroids make u gain weight and untill ur off them u cant lose weight

health is better than vanity surely

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Medical problems can make you gain weight, I went from 6 st 7lb to 30stones in 4 months due to medical problems. It has been a really hard slog to lose over 18 stones.

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By *hite_lightningWoman over a year ago

Oxford

Please don't say that its a choice being fat, when it is not always.

Can you explain this further pls as i dont understand, i can understand how medical reasons can make you gain weight but its a personal choice as to weather you keep that weight.

Kat"

It's not a personal choice whether to keep the weight... the medical condition I have makes it very hard to lose it. I am vegetarian, and eat very healthily. I have two cleaning jobs which I struggle to do because of my other condition, fibromyalgia (which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy) but it helps keep me active. I do try to lose weight for my health, but it is nearly impossible.

But that said, I'm me. Either fat, thin, sky blue pink with yellow dots on, I'm me. And if you don't like it, tough. If I'm not your thing, move on! That's my philosophy.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

In fact, I would love to have someone produce medical proof of any medication making an able bodied person obese. If they provide it, I will happily change my opinion on it - as it is, I have only ever seen it used as an excuse.

Same with smokers blaming giving up fags for their 3st weight increase - it's been medically proven that the maximum weight gain due to metabolism change is about 7 lbs. The rest of the weight gain is due to food!

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

In fact, I would love to have someone produce medical proof of any medication making an able bodied person obese. If they provide it, I will happily change my opinion on it "

What else is it worth? Come on, there's got to be something else in it for me to go to that much effort?

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By *havenangel1Couple over a year ago

Worcester

Please don't say that its a choice being fat, when it is not always.

Can you explain this further pls as i dont understand, i can understand how medical reasons can make you gain weight but its a personal choice as to weather you keep that weight.

Kat"

I am on medication that keeps my weight on and i won't loose it unless i come off the meds. Now i can either choose to come off the meds and loose weight which will cause long term health issues or i can deal with the fact that i'm fat (which i am now very comfortable with) keep my health and get on with life which is exactly what i do and i'm having a great time along the way

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

An opinion changing will not suddenly change the physiological make up of someones body!

We all decide never to use the word fat again - are you suddenly not fat? Are you suddenly not made up of a disproportionate amount of fat? NO! You are still fat with an excess amount of fat on you!

If you are fat, you are fat. There is not other way of looking at it. It being said in a nice way or a nasty way does not take away the fact that you are fat.

Fat used as a hurtful term is wrong.

Fat used as an accurate description is not."

Sometimes we throw around statements willy nilly and call them facts. The 'medical fact' is that all of our bodies have a percentage of fat, a percentage of water (much higher), a percentage of bone, etc etc. Therefore we are all fat! It's just a matter of percentages. We'd probably be more accurate calling people 'water' instead of fat because that's a higher percentage and the bigger you are the more water your probably carrying!

The fact is that someone, somewhere in the past decided to use the word 'fat' to describe a certain body form and through generations people have been told to use that word, it doesn't make it 'factually correct' to call one person fat and another person not fat, it simply makes it a descriptive choice that some are happy with and we now know some are not.

The so called 'facts' are secondary, what matters is the language we choose to describe the body form.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

O crap i think i might have started something now, mine was a genuine question as i did not understand so asked you to further explain, which you have and i thank you that, i now have a better understanding.

Please dont get angry at other peoples opinions this is a forum and not everyone will have the same opinions, but everyone does have the right to express them.

kat x x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

In fact, I would love to have someone produce medical proof of any medication making an able bodied person obese. If they provide it, I will happily change my opinion on it

What else is it worth? Come on, there's got to be something else in it for me to go to that much effort?"

Lol good one.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anyway, that's where it started and the 'beautiful' refers to the 'big' being beautiful... not necessarily the woman.

So... you can be a fuck-pig ugly scuzzlebutt faced BBW, because it's the big which is beautiful.

fully agree here , i love the term rubenesque to describe a large lady that still has the curves in proportion , say a size 16 / 18 any larger makes them a bbw mmmm let me then say bbws are hot too in my book ,as long as they tell me what to do , lol

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By *hite_lightningWoman over a year ago

Oxford

""Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

You really have no idea what you are talking about. After this posting I am going to step away as it is making me a tad angry...

I didn't say medication was the cause of my fatness, just the condition itself. Look up fibromyalgia, and see what I have to put up with. I could sit on my arse all day and do nothing. But I don't. I try to keep active. Ergo I try to lose weight for my health.

I take medication for my other condition which is hypothyroidism, look that up too. And I guess I am not the only one that suffers from either one or the other. Or both at the same time.

Are you a doctor????? Or in the health profession? Please don't make statements when you clearly don't know anything about health issues. You will probably find that you have put the back up of potential meets that read this.... oh sorry, you don't want fat people do you.

Steps away from the forum before exploding.......

Just a quick addendum... I'm glad I clarified your question Kat, just get annoyed when people make generalisations. It wasn't you who started the rant!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

I can take you and show you people who have gained weight due to ONLY medication.

Those being treated with powerful steroids gain lots of weight.

The hospitals are full of them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Actually i have experience of both through friends and family, so while I am personally not ill myself I am aware of what you are experiencing.

I also have a wheelchair bound parent who is on medication, so I am FULLY aware of how hard it is to manage weight. So on that level, and through other personal experience I think I am entitled to have my opinion.

Like I said, someone give me proof of medication and substantial weight gain (not 'can affect weight') and I will add that to my personal perspective. I'm not talking overweight by the way, I did state obese in my post.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can take you and show you people who have gained weight due to ONLY medication.

Those being treated with powerful steroids gain lots of weight.

The hospitals are full of them.

I will state again, as I put in my post (and in the post above) I am referring to obese. Overweight is not obese. I know full well that certain medication can make you gain weight - what I am not aware of is medication that will make you obese if you eat normally and are active.

Also, steroid weight gain isnt necessarily fat - a lot of the time it is huge amounts of water retention. Not that it matters, just thought I would add that as I wanted the post to be a certain length!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes drugs can make you gain weight, but I have yet to see a single person who is obese from their medication and ONLY their medication.

Come to work with me Kitty, I will show you plenty of people who have gained weight due to their medication alone. It is both proven and well documented that certain anti-psychotics( and anti-depressants) cause massive weight gain and obesity is listed as a bona fide side effect. Most of the people taking this medication have absolutely no choice in taking it, therefore have obesity more or less forced upon them! I am talking of men who were into bodybuilding etc, visited the gym daily and in their "normal lives" would have kept themselves very fit!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The thing is..............

No one has to justify why they carry more weight than someone else. Luckily its never hindered me in finding a fella or having fun.

And knowing a lot of voluptuous ladies on here, it doesnt hinder them either.

In life there is someone for everyone.

And on here, you can find them

So be happy regardless of size

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

If someone doesn’t believe medication can and does alter some people’s metabolism, causing massive weight gain, that’s their problem if they want to flaunt their lack of knowledge.

If people do acknowledge some medication leads to weight gain but are too stupid to work out that not all illnesses are acute and thus chronic conditions means prolonged (if not life long) use of such medication … then leave them to wallow in the blissfulness of their ignorance.

Does it make a difference if a person is over weight because of their medication, rather than any one of a number of other reasons?

Does the medication card make one person a better person than another fat person?

Should society feel sorry for fat folk who have to take pills, whilst still scowling at the pie eaters… even those born with the fat gene making them more susceptible to weight gain or those who have the metabolism of a sloth having a nap?

Sit back and have a think before you start trying to differentiate yourself from other people who look the same as you…. ask yourself why you feel the need to do it? Because as far as I am concerned, ignorant people have no business knowing my personal circumstance if the only purpose in sharing is to exclude myself from one of their narrow minded stupidity driven comments.

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"The thing is..............

No one has to justify why they carry more weight than someone else."

Can I edit that line into my post please?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It is both proven and well documented that certain anti-psychotics( and anti-depressants) cause massive weight gain and obesity is listed as a bona fide side effect. Most of the people taking this medication have absolutely no choice in taking it, therefore have obesity more or less forced upon them! I am talking of men who were into bodybuilding etc, visited the gym daily and in their "normal lives" would have kept themselves very fit!"

And when these drugs are prescribed it is also part of the process to highlight this and to raise the persons understanding that they need to adjust diet and lifestyle accordingly - and also the doctor will try to prescribe similar medication that may not affect them as bad if they start to gain weight.

But be realistic, honestly how many people who put on excessive weight on medication have done so purely due to the medication? The statistics from the medical boards do not seem to suggest the percentage is overly high. So if only a percentage of the people who could have an excuse for being fat do so, what excuse do the rest have?

And just to make it clear, I dont dislike fat people. I dislike people who through their own choice (read that again, through their own choice) become fat and then dont like it when people point out they are fat.

Im sick of people playing the "you hurt my feelings" card when someone points out something that they dont want to hear. And I dont mean people being nasty. I mean people being honest.

If you dont like being called fat, take the cake out of your mouth, move away from McDonalds and stop driving round Sainsburys in the free mobility scooter.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The thing is..............

No one has to justify why they carry more weight than someone else."

Totally agree - but they cant expect people to agree with their choice or name for themselves. I cant stop someone choosing their lifestyle, but they have to accept that I might use a correct term for them whether they like it or not.

If you have a conviction to be a certain way, have the strength of that conviction to let other people have their own opinion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

An opinion changing will not suddenly change the physiological make up of someones body!

We all decide never to use the word fat again - are you suddenly not fat? Are you suddenly not made up of a disproportionate amount of fat? NO! You are still fat with an excess amount of fat on you!

If you are fat, you are fat. There is not other way of looking at it. It being said in a nice way or a nasty way does not take away the fact that you are fat.

Fat used as a hurtful term is wrong.

Fat used as an accurate description is not."

Look ... BBW, large, big, overweight, chunky, portly - they are all synonyms for the same thing. If you saw any of those, you'd think 'fat' in your own literal terms and subsequently would probably steer clear of that person as a potential playmate(as would anyone who prefers to play with people carrying less than 25% body fat). So guess what? Objective achieved!! What does it matter to you that they've called themselves something other than fat? You know they're fat - they know they're fat - they just choose to use a different term from the one YOU'D like them to use.

It's no worse than someone saying they have mature skin instead of saying they're wrinkly! Should we all be yelling,"Biologically, you're wrinkly goddamit so that's what you MUST be called!!'? I'd personally have no problem with someone saying they have mature skin - I'm intelligent enough to get the picture and don't need a stark term to spell it out.

What's the problem with people choosing whatever synonym they're comfortable with as long as it's an honest appraisal of themselves and adds up to the same thing?

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Im sick of people playing the "you hurt my feelings" card when someone points out something that they dont want to hear. And I dont mean people being nasty. I mean people being honest.

If you dont like being called fat, take the cake out of your mouth, move away from McDonalds and stop driving round Sainsburys in the free mobility scooter."

And if you don't wish to be called ignorant and a few other things... I suggest you move away from the keyboard.

You posted:

"The statistics from the medical boards do not seem to suggest the percentage is overly high. So if only a percentage of the people who could have an excuse for being fat do so, what excuse do the rest have?"

So there you have proof some people are fat due to medication.

Who made you god so you could ask what everyone else's excuse is?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Im sick of people playing the "you hurt my feelings" card when someone points out something that they dont want to hear. And I dont mean people being nasty. I mean people being honest.

If you dont like being called fat, take the cake out of your mouth, move away from McDonalds and stop driving round Sainsburys in the free mobility scooter."
Having a personal view on this subject is what the forums are all about, however stating that "someone" has the right to point this out to a person that they class as over weight in my book is down right rude.Having an opinion is good, but never at the cost of hurting a persons feelings!!!!!! We are all made different, and we all make choices . Often ppl who feel they need to bring others down do so due to lack of confidence in themselves.Plus i am sure none of us are perfect!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If someone doesn’t believe medication can and does alter some people’s metabolism, causing massive weight gain, that’s their problem if they want to flaunt their lack of knowledge.

Does it make a difference if a person is over weight because of their medication, rather than any one of a number of other reasons?

Does the medication card make one person a better person than another fat person?

Good post.

I do not understand why there is any desire to differentiate between the reasons for weight gain. Am I missing something?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is drug induced weight gain more prestigeous than pie induced? Or vice versa? Again who cares? We're here to play not discuss weight gain/loss! The OP wanted to identify body types not discuss how they porked up in the first place!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You posted:

So there you have proof some people are fat due to medication.

Who made you god so you could ask what everyone else's excuse is?

Yes, I did state that medical societies say of a percentage of people are fat due to medication.

And your point is? I also stated that its nowhere near the amount that use it as justification though. And that is not my opinion, that is the medically stated opinion.

If someone hates being something, which a lot of fat people appear to do otherwise they wouldnt hate their size being mentioned, then surely there has to be a reason they are still that way?

Unless of course it boils down to the fact that, as a lot of people assume, its willpower and self control thats the issue. Surely they would have an excuse otherwise, surely they wouldnt be something they appear to hate and not do something about it? Surely not?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What's the problem with people choosing whatever synonym they're comfortable with as long as it's an honest appraisal of themselves and adds up to the same thing?

Read all of my posts again. Not once have I voiced an opinion on what people can call themselves (but hey, you would know that if you had read them all), I am stating that - using the same rule of fairness - they cannot dictate what term I use to describe them if the term I use is factually correct.

Christ, I dont care what anyone calls themselves - just dont try to tell me what terms I can use if the terms I use are legally and factually correct!

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

My point is.... I have no point, because there is no point in debating anything with the type of person who posts this...

"If you dont like being called fat, take the cake out of your mouth, move away from McDonalds and stop driving round Sainsburys in the free mobility scooter."

... and then thinks they have the right to question what everyone else's excuse is for being fat.

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it would depend on whether or not they woman is willing to apply BBW to her profile. Large seems to be the only option at the moment that would apply to those BBW's.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't understand why some people think that those of us who are carrying varying degrees of excess fat should explain why we do. Our lives are not an open book for all to peruse and criticise and I for one am not about to provide any 'excuses' for my dress size. How and why I ended upo this size is MY business. If I'm not to someone's taste then that's fine - they pass me by and I don't fret. Simple.

Plenty of people don't like tattoos or body piercings but most of those wouldn't dream of vociferously demanding the reasons why someone would choose to do that to themselves. They accept that person is into body art and leave it at that. Why can't people who aren't into wobbly sex just do the same?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

No, I have decided to stay around a little bit longer purely to argue with the sanctimonious self righteous holier than thou people that populate this board and think that anyone with an opinion they dont like is in the wrong.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My point is.... I have no point, because there is no point in debating anything with the type of person who posts this...

"If you dont like being called fat, take the cake out of your mouth, move away from McDonalds and stop driving round Sainsburys in the free mobility scooter."

... and then thinks they have the right to question what everyone else's excuse is for being fat.

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

I don't think he or she should leave, they are entitled to their opinion and to being part of this debate.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

The thing is Katty, the fatties can lose weight if they so wish; Short of a charm transplant you're kinda screwed aren't you....

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

Ahhhh I'll leave ya to it then... because I don't think you are in the wrong... I know that! I just think you're ignorant and carrying a lot of vile bitterness... which isn't really my problem.

Enjoy!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Christ, I dont care what anyone calls themselves - just dont try to tell me what terms I can use if the terms I use are legally and factually correct!"

Gosh you really are a charmer aren't you!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The sooner you leave the better.... as this seems your intention as stated on your profile. I am not suprised you attracted the type of people you complain about.... you seem to have a lot in common.

Come on, we are adults having an adult debate. You have an opinion, even though I disagree with much of what you've said I respect your opinion and the fact you are debating it. Lets not let this turn into a name calling session.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Im sure ruebens had the same arguement when painting the ladies he so liked to see adorning his walls

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

omg how this has snowballed poor ben only wanted to know if a better filter on search would be helpfull

poor guy is hiding up the corner

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

ooppss forgot to shamlessly plug the bbw bash again

sunday 12th dec pm us to get on the guest list

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well, if nothing else....it's sure amusing.

fortunately, I've never had anyone point at me in the street and say "you're fat"...to be honest, I'd consider that kind of perceptiveness to exist only in the mouth of a 5 year old child.

thankfully i do live in a society where, even if folk do think it, they're considerate enough not to think "oh, I should tell her that...in case she hadn't noticed".

it's a shame that the same respect can't be exercised on this site...but folk are a bit more brave when it comes to exercising both their ignorance and bitterness when they are sheltered by the anominity these forums provide.

it's also a shame that a persons personality can be hid better than a few pounds of weight or a different colour of skin....if only the ugly inside could be as visible...I wonder if those folk would mind walking down the street, having someone point it out and shout it to them for all to hear?

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By *lack_BoltMan over a year ago

oxford

Im sick of people playing the "you hurt my feelings" card when someone points out something that they dont want to hear. "

Hoist by your own petard I believe.

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By *lack_BoltMan over a year ago

oxford

"omg how this has snowballed poor ben only wanted to know if a better filter on search would be helpfull

poor guy is hiding up the corner

I think he's left the building.

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By *lack_BoltMan over a year ago

oxford

"well, if nothing else....it's sure amusing.

fortunately, I've never had anyone point at me in the street and say "you're fat"...to be honest, I'd consider that kind of perceptiveness to exist only in the mouth of a 5 year old child.

thankfully i do live in a society where, even if folk do think it, they're considerate enough not to think "oh, I should tell her that...in case she hadn't noticed".

Well said! This started off as such good thread.

Sorry Ben! All is forgiven!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"omg how this has snowballed poor ben only wanted to know if a better filter on search would be helpfull

poor guy is hiding up the corner

its ok im keeping him company

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"omg how this has snowballed poor ben only wanted to know if a better filter on search would be helpfull

poor guy is hiding up the corner

its ok im keeping him company

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