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By *adyJayne OP Woman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
Sorry, none lighthearted post ahead.
A few years ago a friend of mine said that I could walk into a room and someone just knew there was something different about me. I almost used to strut.
I've always been on the curvy side, at least since my late teens (health related issues caused weight gain that is taking years to shift) but it didn't matter, despite what men may have admitted to their partners or their friends I had something that men wanted (even if they would never admit to wanting a bbw!)
Fast forward a few years and I'm loved up, but no longer playing with men, just women, however I've lost that spark that confidence I had, I feel self conscious, I don't feel that power and command I once had.
Anyone know how to get it back? Anyone else felt like this? (No playing with men is not an option, my new partner can't handle the thought and I am not cheating on him) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sorry, none lighthearted post ahead.
A few years ago a friend of mine said that I could walk into a room and someone just knew there was something different about me. I almost used to strut.
I've always been on the curvy side, at least since my late teens (health related issues caused weight gain that is taking years to shift) but it didn't matter, despite what men may have admitted to their partners or their friends I had something that men wanted (even if they would never admit to wanting a bbw!)
Fast forward a few years and I'm loved up, but no longer playing with men, just women, however I've lost that spark that confidence I had, I feel self conscious, I don't feel that power and command I once had.
Anyone know how to get it back? Anyone else felt like this? (No playing with men is not an option, my new partner can't handle the thought and I am not cheating on him)"
I am a feeling the same lately  so can sympathise x |
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By *adyJayne OP Woman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
Cheers guys. It wasn't some thinly veiled attempt to get compliments. I think my pictures look great, after all most people only post pictures they like.
Is about the mental side of things, how do I make my brain remember what it's like to feel that seines, that sass, I want to feel like that girl again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Try a club, go with a lady friend rather than your man. You'll be fighting them off xx
Feel desired and know you are.
"Cheers guys. It wasn't some thinly veiled attempt to get compliments. I think my pictures look great, after all most people only post pictures they like.
Is about the mental side of things, how do I make my brain remember what it's like to feel that seines, that sass, I want to feel like that girl again "
 |
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By *adyJayne OP Woman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Try a club, go with a lady friend rather than your man. You'll be fighting them off xx
Feel desired and know you are.
"
I guess, given that I can't play with men I wouldn't want to be accused of being a tease, although I do enjoy a good watch haha |
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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
"Sorry, none lighthearted post ahead.
A few years ago a friend of mine said that I could walk into a room and someone just knew there was something different about me. I almost used to strut.
I've always been on the curvy side, at least since my late teens (health related issues caused weight gain that is taking years to shift) but it didn't matter, despite what men may have admitted to their partners or their friends I had something that men wanted (even if they would never admit to wanting a bbw!)
Fast forward a few years and I'm loved up, but no longer playing with men, just women, however I've lost that spark that confidence I had, I feel self conscious, I don't feel that power and command I once had.
Anyone know how to get it back? Anyone else felt like this? (No playing with men is not an option, my new partner can't handle the thought and I am not cheating on him)"
Firstly you have a fantastic figure.
Yes I fully understand how you feel I have body confidence issues which constantly mag at me.. Luckily if Dick says I look good I actually believe him which helps.
Some days are better than others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had rock bottom self esteem after my marriage broke down, and I had quite extensive therapy at the time. I had to firstly learn to just accept what and who I am (I couldn't even look in a mirror without feeling physically sick ), before I could start to find things I actually liked about myself. We started by listing all my positive personality traits (luckily I'm quite a nice person, lol!) and I had to write down specific instances of when I'd demonstrated each "good point". Then I had to stand in the mirror and say, out loud, something I could see on myself that I deemed acceptable. It probably sounds ridiculous, but it was really really hard work, turned me inside out doing it to start with, but the longer I did it the more natural it became. I still have parts of my body I'm not keen on, but to know and own my self worth is the most empowering thing I've ever done. I'll never be an egotist, but I like myself now. I enjoy my curves, and anyone who doesn't can merrily skip on their way!  We're often very quick to nurture relationships and friendships, but forget that we deserve to have a healthy relationship with ourselves too. Big hugs OP.xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It takes a long time for people to accept who they are. I look at myself and see all kinds of things that could be objectionable, then I remember some people could actually like those things.
Now I chose to spend my time in the company of people who appreciate me, even if I do consider them crazy for their unacountable taste lol |
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