FabSwingers.com > Forums > Virus > Further consequences of conspiracies
Further consequences of conspiracies
Jump to: Newest in thread
Those of you who followed my earlier thread re: my Grandad, who died of Covid a week ago, caught because my mother and her husband deny Covid and did not follow the rules, may wish to know how this story ends. My mother informed me earlier tonight that her husband died at about 6pm. He'd been in hospital (Covid positive) for 12 days. He was 73, overweight and diabetic (she also denies those facts, apart from his age). She "cannot believe they have both died. They only had viral pneumonia." Also his passing was, she alleges, a consequence of the medication he was given (against his consent). Clearly, that is untrue, but it is what has been said today before his passing and also after.
I'm sharing this for all of the Covidiots out there. All of the people who think there's no pandemic, who think it's okay to claim fake mask exemption and to continue "living your life" because "it's your right".
It was my Grandad's right to live his life. But he's dead. Today I chose flowers for his coffin and coached his 90 year old former work colleague through how to log into the live video stream of his funeral.
My mother's decisions (and her husband's) have lead to the absolutely unnecessary loss of two lives within a week. I might not have had much affection for my "stepfather", but he was still a human being and by all accounts, his passing was not as peaceful as my Grandad's. At least I was able to spend some time with Grandad on the day before he died. My mother arrived to ICU five minutes after her husband's death.
To all who think such events will knock the conspiracy theories out of people - don't be so sure. What happens next remains to be seen, but I am of the unfortunate view that this will only serve to further push her away from the rational and towards the irrational. Of course, we have offered our support, to go to her etc, all of which has been declined.
Wear the masks
Wash your hands
Have the vaccine if you are eligible/suitable
Don't continue socialising, against the rules
Don't try to circumvent the rules
Thus endeth the lesson. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Just as an extra extra addendum, I've just found out my stepfather's son-in-law is possibly also in hospital with Covid (unrelated to my Grandad and him). He's certainly very unwell too. Male, 50s, likes to drink, overweight. I hope my stepfather's daughter is not dealing with a double bereavement and I feel for his two Grandsons too, with a dead Grandad and very ill father. Heaven knows what my mother told his family  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Those of you who followed my earlier thread re: my Grandad, who died of Covid a week ago, caught because my mother and her husband deny Covid and did not follow the rules, may wish to know how this story ends. My mother informed me earlier tonight that her husband died at about 6pm. He'd been in hospital (Covid positive) for 12 days. He was 73, overweight and diabetic (she also denies those facts, apart from his age). She "cannot believe they have both died. They only had viral pneumonia." Also his passing was, she alleges, a consequence of the medication he was given (against his consent). Clearly, that is untrue, but it is what has been said today before his passing and also after.
I'm sharing this for all of the Covidiots out there. All of the people who think there's no pandemic, who think it's okay to claim fake mask exemption and to continue "living your life" because "it's your right".
It was my Grandad's right to live his life. But he's dead. Today I chose flowers for his coffin and coached his 90 year old former work colleague through how to log into the live video stream of his funeral.
My mother's decisions (and her husband's) have lead to the absolutely unnecessary loss of two lives within a week. I might not have had much affection for my "stepfather", but he was still a human being and by all accounts, his passing was not as peaceful as my Grandad's. At least I was able to spend some time with Grandad on the day before he died. My mother arrived to ICU five minutes after her husband's death.
To all who think such events will knock the conspiracy theories out of people - don't be so sure. What happens next remains to be seen, but I am of the unfortunate view that this will only serve to further push her away from the rational and towards the irrational. Of course, we have offered our support, to go to her etc, all of which has been declined.
Wear the masks
Wash your hands
Have the vaccine if you are eligible/suitable
Don't continue socialising, against the rules
Don't try to circumvent the rules
Thus endeth the lesson."
Thank you for sharing your story at this sad time. My deepest sympathies xxc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just as an extra extra addendum, I've just found out my stepfather's son-in-law is possibly also in hospital with Covid (unrelated to my Grandad and him). He's certainly very unwell too. Male, 50s, likes to drink, overweight. I hope my stepfather's daughter is not dealing with a double bereavement and I feel for his two Grandsons too, with a dead Grandad and very ill father. Heaven knows what my mother told his family "
Oh this really is awful and I'm so sorry this is happening. X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
So sorry this has happened to you, I am glad you were able to go and see your granddad in the hospital before his passing. I bet that meant a lot to him! I send you big hugs
I also should add, I’m not sure what goes on in denier people’s mind , whether it’s easier to believe that it just doesn’t exist so you create conspiracies in your head in order to avoid facing the harsh realities. Either way, I do hope they will open their eyes and change for the better..
It must be extremely frustrating/angering position to be in, when that’s your mum , so also on that I’m sending you big hugs! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Crikey this keeps getting worse.
Sincere condolences,I have been reading your updates with heart in mouth as it's staggering the damage that has been caused.
I think you need to take very good care of yourself now and be very careful.
Let's hope your mum finally see's the truth of it all,but it sounds like she's in denial.
Take care x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Op, again thank you for sharing this with the forum. Hard enough when we go through loss of our loved ones in what we call normal times but when there's denial and ignorance by some we love that contributes to the unnecessary loss that has to add further emotions at an already sad time..
Look after yourself.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I am so so sorry. This has moved me to tears this morning. I cannot imagine the maelstrom of feelings and emotions you must be dealing with right now.
If just one person reads your story and as a result reconsiders their actions then it has been well worth sharing. Truly sobering xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *irldnCouple
over a year ago
Brighton |
"I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot "
Agreed.
I would respectfully suggest to all that this thread is kept free of arguments and opinion and saved for condolences for what is clearly very sad and painful news.
We can easily start many other threads to bicker on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot "
People who make a calculated decision to NOT follow the rules put in place to protect them and others, preferring to die in ICU by drowning in their own bodily fluids, is an idiot. The person who cannot see or accept that a hitherto unknown infectious agent (aka SARS-CoV-2) is the cause of that death or deaths, preferring instead to accuse hard working doctors and nurses of deliberately killing people with morphine and other medications, is also an idiot.
My mother is an idiot.
Her deceased husband was an idiot.
The death of my Grandad in the circumstances was avoidable. The death of my mother's husband was MORE than avoidable. Other than diabetes, he was apparently fit and more active than many people in their 70s.
At no point have these idiots ever considered the impact of their behaviour on others. On the two children of my mother's husband, who she did not tell of his illness. Suddenly, they find their father is dead on a random Monday night. That, on top of one of them having a spouse in hospital with it too.
She says she's alone. She's not, she's been offered help and support, but no, she will get support from her "friends". People who continue to delude her. People who tell her aliens have made a galactic federation agreement with earth and that aliens will reveal themselves if she behaves in a certain way. Who will be holding her hand on her death bed? I guarantee it won't be the "friends" online, nor any benevolent "alien".
I maintain that anyone who denies to this point is an idiot and I'm afraid I won't be able to change that opinion. People who believe aliens have made a galactic federation on earth are something else, but not sure what adjective to choose. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *JCouple
over a year ago
Teesside |
"I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot
People who make a calculated decision to NOT follow the rules put in place to protect them and others, preferring to die in ICU by drowning in their own bodily fluids, is an idiot. The person who cannot see or accept that a hitherto unknown infectious agent (aka SARS-CoV-2) is the cause of that death or deaths, preferring instead to accuse hard working doctors and nurses of deliberately killing people with morphine and other medications, is also an idiot.
My mother is an idiot.
Her deceased husband was an idiot.
The death of my Grandad in the circumstances was avoidable. The death of my mother's husband was MORE than avoidable. Other than diabetes, he was apparently fit and more active than many people in their 70s.
At no point have these idiots ever considered the impact of their behaviour on others. On the two children of my mother's husband, who she did not tell of his illness. Suddenly, they find their father is dead on a random Monday night. That, on top of one of them having a spouse in hospital with it too.
She says she's alone. She's not, she's been offered help and support, but no, she will get support from her "friends". People who continue to delude her. People who tell her aliens have made a galactic federation agreement with earth and that aliens will reveal themselves if she behaves in a certain way. Who will be holding her hand on her death bed? I guarantee it won't be the "friends" online, nor any benevolent "alien".
I maintain that anyone who denies to this point is an idiot and I'm afraid I won't be able to change that opinion. People who believe aliens have made a galactic federation on earth are something else, but not sure what adjective to choose."
Your Grandad was the innocent victim whose needless death was caused by these idiots beliefs you have every right to say what you say x
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why did your mother's husband go to hospital if he thought he was going to be deliberately killed there by morphine and other medications ? "
Because my mother called my Grandad's nearest neighbour, a retired GP on Wednesday a fortnight ago. He found he'd had a seizure and was incontinent. He insisted on an ambulance being called. My mother disagreed. The retired GP said he'd call it and wait outside because she was withholding medical care. So he went in an ambulance and that's that. I have no idea what he said (or was able to say) to the staff, but I do know my mother has been ringing and insisting she will come and take him home (she's friends on FB with the guy from Essex who did that). She verbalised her views on the medications to the staff on the phone.
She herself was ill (denied) and she spent the week after both her husband and my Grandad were taken to hospital in bed. I believe she was too ill in the first week to do much of anything. She appears to have recovered now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It sounds like there are several family issues, not least between you and your Mother.
Sorry for all these souls. My advice would be to find some peace amongst it all."
Yes, this is the culmination of an extremely dysfunctional upbringing, only made tolerable and reasonably normal by the actions of my late Grandparents. It's hard not to be angry when this has pervaded your entire life. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It sounds like there are several family issues, not least between you and your Mother.
Sorry for all these souls. My advice would be to find some peace amongst it all.
Yes, this is the culmination of an extremely dysfunctional upbringing, only made tolerable and reasonably normal by the actions of my late Grandparents. It's hard not to be angry when this has pervaded your entire life."
I know, my upbringing was awful to. The reason I say find some peace is, I raged for years inside, I believe this lead to me drinking to much to self medicate and eventually a heart attack at 51. Take care lovely of yourself, you cannot change others xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Sorry for your loss, and thanks for taking the time to tell the story on here. Even if it resonates with one person and gets them to change their behaviour, that's success. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sorry for your loss, and thanks for taking the time to tell the story on here. Even if it resonates with one person and gets them to change their behaviour, that's success. "
That is my reason for sharing the whole sorry story, as fully as I can without identifying people. The retired GP who attended to my stepfather two weeks ago is very upset at the news, he's just been in touch. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now? "
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now?
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you."
There are a subset who link aliens to the pandemic |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now?
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you.
There are a subset who link aliens to the pandemic"
I haven't questioned my mother further about the aliens and any connection to the pandemic and am minded not to start asking |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now?
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you.
There are a subset who link aliens to the pandemic
I haven't questioned my mother further about the aliens and any connection to the pandemic and am minded not to start asking "
Ask them no questions and they'll tell you no lies. (Them/they is general) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As sad as your story is, it will only speak to the majority.
Anyone who follows conspiracies will just mark this up as another government planted story or just refuse to read and tune into their own bubble of information.
I think the majority delude themselves when they think we live in a world or reason and logic.
Gossip and none evidence based chit-chat will always have a place within society and there will always be some who chose to follow it.
The most you can hope is that they limit the impacts of their actions to as few people as possible.
All part of living in an inclusive society where even the illogical are permitted to have a belief no matter how much it is disproved. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now?
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you.
There are a subset who link aliens to the pandemic
I haven't questioned my mother further about the aliens and any connection to the pandemic and am minded not to start asking
Ask them no questions and they'll tell you no lies. (Them/they is general)"
I think my mother's pronouns are her/she  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Has it really come down to Aliens now?
I'm not sure how or if the aliens are linked to the pandemic, but yes, there are people who believe in galactic federations between aliens and humans and that they are doing the work required to have them reveal themselves to you.
There are a subset who link aliens to the pandemic
I haven't questioned my mother further about the aliens and any connection to the pandemic and am minded not to start asking
Ask them no questions and they'll tell you no lies. (Them/they is general)
I think my mother's pronouns are her/she "
My apologies. Bad woke snowflake 
More, I have no person in mind and "one will tell you no lies" is too pretentious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Picked up a bunch of my Grandad's mail.
The national "book your Covid vaccine" was top of the pile, dated 20th January. He went into hospital on the 21st/22nd overnight.
Letters from utility providers saying because the DD has been cancelled that they'll charge more for energy (we've informed them of the death). Such compassion in the letters.
His subscription to a daily newspaper and letters thanking him for his support of a local charity, through paying an annual "membership"..... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ocbigMan
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"Picked up a bunch of my Grandad's mail.
The national "book your Covid vaccine" was top of the pile, dated 20th January. He went into hospital on the 21st/22nd overnight.
Letters from utility providers saying because the DD has been cancelled that they'll charge more for energy (we've informed them of the death). Such compassion in the letters.
His subscription to a daily newspaper and letters thanking him for his support of a local charity, through paying an annual "membership"....."
It is hard clearing out after a death, I am sure circumstances make this even worse & more poignant. I hope you can stay strong. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Nice to have received a splurge of emails from his musical connections, all really lovely and saying how much his contribution has been hugely beneficial and will be missed. I'm looking into setting up some sort of perpetual grant or award in his name for young musicians. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Nice to have received a splurge of emails from his musical connections, all really lovely and saying how much his contribution has been hugely beneficial and will be missed. I'm looking into setting up some sort of perpetual grant or award in his name for young musicians."
A lovely idea  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’m sorry for your loss.
I do wish you and others wouldn’t keep name calling anyone who doesn’t fit to the ‘standard government narrative’ as a covidiot. This name calling isn’t necessary. People may have genuine concerns or beliefs, it doesn’t make every single one of them an idiot "
If you're reading an account of how people's denial of reality lead to avoidable deaths and your thought is 'hey now, let's not be harsh' I'm afraid your priorities are completely wrong.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Thinking of you 
My fad, 54, healthy weight, very active job and gym, no comorbidities just got discharged from hospital after being really poorly.
He was also vaccinated over 3 weeks ago (job)
It definitely doesn’t pick and chose who it affects! Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Nice to have received a splurge of emails from his musical connections, all really lovely and saying how much his contribution has been hugely beneficial and will be missed. I'm looking into setting up some sort of perpetual grant or award in his name for young musicians."
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I've kept away from the virus forum for a good few days and only just seen this.
I do hope people listen
"
Don't forget to sanitise every square inch on the way out, Peachy. Don't forget all the nooks and crannies |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
So i have to read up on it do i, i wibder why the government havent made releases or comments about it, after all they have been quick to tell us to self isolate, social dustance get tested and that covid is on the increase, not so quick yo rxplain the deaths from the vaccine |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Why are conspuracy theorists being blamed for the continued lockdowns, mask wearing and deaths fir spreading covid, yet everybody turns a blind eye to those people who died after having the vaccination??? "
This is utterly irrelevant to my family situation. Neither of the deceased had a vaccine (one had been invited but became ill before the appointment). I would kindly ask you take your theorising about vaccines elsewhere, thank you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sincerest condolences to you.
In my experience I've not witnessed naysayers claiming it a conspiracy as of yet.. it's the , what I term as 'dont give a f#ck mate' sorts. ignorant ass douches. Indeed Covidiots to a tee. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"So i have to read up on it do i, i wibder why the government havent made releases or comments about it, after all they have been quick to tell us to self isolate, social dustance get tested and that covid is on the increase, not so quick yo rxplain the deaths from the vaccine"
Every trust, GP practice and organisation running any health care services, included vaccines reports their incidents.
Ask for the info and you’ll get the answer
I asked and it made me chose which vaccine i preferred.
Simple really if you actually want to find out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rank59Man
over a year ago
Northwich |
I am so sorry for your loss. What a terrible thing.
I have had many people say to me I don't know anyone who has died'. Well I know of four directly(not family members). A forum I am in (not swinging) has a member who's family did not believe in the virus. He has lost his mother, father, brother and his son and wife are seriously ill in hospital. They live in the states. Other members of the family STILL deny it exists!!!
Of the four I know personally, only one had any underlying conditions and that was not life threatening. I used to work in laboratories dealing with all sorts of things and you soon learn just how contagious some of these things are! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickerMan
over a year ago
Preston |
I hate the word covidiots. I Don't really understand the alien theory. We were never going to get this disease under control whilst our borders were open.
The ones that shut there borders are the ones that have coped the best. It would be great if everyone could stay in and do nothing but,people need to go shopping or go to work or whatever else they need to do.
Our best hope is the vaccine being as effective as we have been told. I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It could have been prevented by the sounds of it. It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Picked up a bunch of my Grandad's mail.
The national "book your Covid vaccine" was top of the pile, dated 20th January. He went into hospital on the 21st/22nd overnight.
Letters from utility providers saying because the DD has been cancelled that they'll charge more for energy (we've informed them of the death). Such compassion in the letters.
His subscription to a daily newspaper and letters thanking him for his support of a local charity, through paying an annual "membership"....."
That is the worst part of losing someone, dealing with the faceless call centres.
Sorry for your loss. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I hate the word covidiots. I Don't really understand the alien theory. We were never going to get this disease under control whilst our borders were open.
The ones that shut there borders are the ones that have coped the best. It would be great if everyone could stay in and do nothing but,people need to go shopping or go to work or whatever else they need to do.
Our best hope is the vaccine being as effective as we have been told. I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It could have been prevented by the sounds of it. It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down."
Could show a bit of empathy mate instead of making a snarky remark honestly have some honour. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down."
Yes, I am very bitter about my childhood filled with emotional abuse, about spending my life acting as the adult to a mother incapable of acting in our best interests rather than her own. About acting as a surrogate mother to my brother (who is only 2.5yrs younger) or for the financial burdens she placed various members of the family under (both living and now deceased).
I resent the suggestion that I should grieve for the stepfather who was every "ist" you can list (plus Holocaust denier) and who bullied my brother from adolescence onwards incessantly like a schoolyard eejit.
I resent the actions ongoing of my mother and the fact that the world seems to think I am somehow responsible for her (deeply stupid) actions and who ask me what she'll do next.
I have no desire to have a better or frankly any relationship with my mother anymore. However, the current situation means I cannot simply ignore her. She is living in a property that I, along with my uncle, are legally responsible for and she does have the right to come to her father's funeral (despite her actions).
Anyone who would have these experiences from childhood (so for 35 years and counting) and who can simply brush it off and forgive or whatever is a much better person than I. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Picked up a bunch of my Grandad's mail.
The national "book your Covid vaccine" was top of the pile, dated 20th January. He went into hospital on the 21st/22nd overnight.
Letters from utility providers saying because the DD has been cancelled that they'll charge more for energy (we've informed them of the death). Such compassion in the letters.
His subscription to a daily newspaper and letters thanking him for his support of a local charity, through paying an annual "membership".....
That is the worst part of losing someone, dealing with the faceless call centres.
Sorry for your loss."
Ironically the nicest call so far has been to the company who supplied central heating fuel for his house. The accounts lady was absolutely lovely. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickerMan
over a year ago
Preston |
" It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down.
Yes, I am very bitter about my childhood filled with emotional abuse, about spending my life acting as the adult to a mother incapable of acting in our best interests rather than her own. About acting as a surrogate mother to my brother (who is only 2.5yrs younger) or for the financial burdens she placed various members of the family under (both living and now deceased).
I resent the suggestion that I should grieve for the stepfather who was every "ist" you can list (plus Holocaust denier) and who bullied my brother from adolescence onwards incessantly like a schoolyard eejit.
I resent the actions ongoing of my mother and the fact that the world seems to think I am somehow responsible for her (deeply stupid) actions and who ask me what she'll do next.
I have no desire to have a better or frankly any relationship with my mother anymore. However, the current situation means I cannot simply ignore her. She is living in a property that I, along with my uncle, are legally responsible for and she does have the right to come to her father's funeral (despite her actions).
Anyone who would have these experiences from childhood (so for 35 years and counting) and who can simply brush it off and forgive or whatever is a much better person than I."
You have had a difficult time. Not just recently but all the way through as it sounds. Its very difficult to forgive things especially with what has gone on.
Sometimes you have to move on. Unfortunately the commitments you have, will mean you can't just cut ties. You will have to speak to her about these things but there isn't much you can do about it. I don't like to see family's falling apart but only time will tell how it ends up.
Hopefully you are OK. You have a lot on your plate at the moment. I wish you all the best. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down.
Yes, I am very bitter about my childhood filled with emotional abuse, about spending my life acting as the adult to a mother incapable of acting in our best interests rather than her own. About acting as a surrogate mother to my brother (who is only 2.5yrs younger) or for the financial burdens she placed various members of the family under (both living and now deceased).
I resent the suggestion that I should grieve for the stepfather who was every "ist" you can list (plus Holocaust denier) and who bullied my brother from adolescence onwards incessantly like a schoolyard eejit.
I resent the actions ongoing of my mother and the fact that the world seems to think I am somehow responsible for her (deeply stupid) actions and who ask me what she'll do next.
I have no desire to have a better or frankly any relationship with my mother anymore. However, the current situation means I cannot simply ignore her. She is living in a property that I, along with my uncle, are legally responsible for and she does have the right to come to her father's funeral (despite her actions).
Anyone who would have these experiences from childhood (so for 35 years and counting) and who can simply brush it off and forgive or whatever is a much better person than I.
You have had a difficult time. Not just recently but all the way through as it sounds. Its very difficult to forgive things especially with what has gone on.
Sometimes you have to move on. Unfortunately the commitments you have, will mean you can't just cut ties. You will have to speak to her about these things but there isn't much you can do about it. I don't like to see family's falling apart but only time will tell how it ends up.
Hopefully you are OK. You have a lot on your plate at the moment. I wish you all the best."
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickerMan
over a year ago
Preston |
"I hate the word covidiots. I Don't really understand the alien theory. We were never going to get this disease under control whilst our borders were open.
The ones that shut there borders are the ones that have coped the best. It would be great if everyone could stay in and do nothing but,people need to go shopping or go to work or whatever else they need to do.
Our best hope is the vaccine being as effective as we have been told. I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It could have been prevented by the sounds of it. It sounds like you are very bitter about it. Hopefully you can sort something out and have a better relationship than the route you are going down.
Could show a bit of empathy mate instead of making a snarky remark honestly have some honour. "
I didn't mean to put any snarky comments. I'm sorry if any offence caused. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'll cope. I've made it this far. But I've always had my Grandad as my confidant, my trusted expert and my surrogate father (and my late Grandmother as surrogate mother, until she died in 2010). My Grandparents made my life normal and to lose him in this specific circumstance is much harder than if he'd died at home of his heart problems. I'm not stupid, he wouldn't ever be immortal, but catching this disease from people wilfully denying and actively not following the rules is just too much.
My legal responsibilities will be discharged properly and effectively, but to do that, there has to be some release in the background. This is partly the background for me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
