FabSwingers.com > Forums > Wales > What’s putting people off us?
What’s putting people off us?
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Genuine question and I want brutal answers, what is putting couples and women off us? Are we showing too much to the point it’s tasteless? We get winks and message people but don’t get a reply 🤣 or we message couples we feel like are a good match and no reply. We only message women who are interested in couples but none are interested in us 🤣 we’re very new to the world of swinging so give us some tips. Thank you x |
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Reading your profile comes across a little negative ,it's more about what you don't like rather than what you do , perfectly understandable to have standards of course , your pictures are very very good so I dont think physical attraction is an issue , you both obviously take a lot of time over your fitness and appearance which is great but personally I think that can be a little intimidating for some people , they may feel they cant live up to you in terms of body type ? Just my observation obviously  |
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I’ll be honest, it was the ‘if you’re a 2 out of 10’ part that put me off. I appreciate we aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but before reading that I’d have potentially looked to have got in touch…
Photos are no more ‘explicit’ than more profiles on here to be fair, they’re actually very nice and a decent selection of you both rather than a lot of couples profiles that mostly focus on showing off one half of the couple even though they want to meet as a pair |
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"Reading your profile comes across a little negative ,it's more about what you don't like rather than what you do , perfectly understandable to have standards of course , your pictures are very very good so I dont think physical attraction is an issue , you both obviously take a lot of time over your fitness and appearance which is great but personally I think that can be a little intimidating for some people , they may feel they cant live up to you in terms of body type ? Just my observation obviously "
And this too… |
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I’ve completely changed our bio. We are really not up our own arse dick heads I promise you. Was just getting so many unwanted messages from older men I wanted to be blunt! We’re really nice people haha well I’d like to think we are anyway. Thank you x |
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Interesting to see it’s a fab wide, scene wide issue no matter how buff you are.
The profile that I’ve just read is good. You have a age boundary set up so that should sort the problem of us oldies trying to bother you
It’s a nice profile.
Have a lovely weekend. |
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By *3xymamaWoman 13 weeks ago
...., Wales |
"Oh god I put my foot in it again 🤣 thank you. We changed our bio so we no longer look like complete arse holes x "
Your profile, you run it as it suits you. As others have said, good profile text and very nice pictures which show both of you.. maybe try the club scene too? At least you get to meet lots of people on neutral territory and can chat and gauge attraction etc 🥰 |
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Well there's definitely nothing wrong with you physically, that's for sure! You make an attractive couple. As silly as it sounds, I wonder if some are put off you both because they might think you're too hot and that they wouldn't be attractive enough for you?
- Mrs |
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The updated bio looks good, although, if I'm being picky, I'd maybe space the paragraphs out a little, makes it a little easier to read.
Also, within blowing smoke up your ass, I'd be a little intimidated tbh. You're a good looking couple. So it may be a 'them' issue rather than a 'you' issue. Hope that makes sense |
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"I’ve completely changed our bio. We are really not up our own arse dick heads I promise you. Was just getting so many unwanted messages from older men I wanted to be blunt! We’re really nice people haha well I’d like to think we are anyway. Thank you x "
That reads so much better! As others have said, clubs are a good place to meet people on neutral ground, as are organised socials. The socials are a really great start because there are all types of people that attend with a wide variety of experience in the scene, various ages ranges, kinks, desires and interests and it vastly broadens your net so to speak. In addition, you can make some pretty awesome friends to hang out with even if you aren’t compatible play wise, as well as companions to meet at other events, such as those in the club scene, house parties and other social type events like the masquerade balls. Plus there’s less pressure to ‘play’ at a an organised social too - you can make great connections on a social level, chat and then take things forward at a later date if you click with people (or even have an after party on the night!) |
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"Noted! Someone else said about spacing paragraphs lol. You’re gorgeous and shouldn’t feel intimidated by anyone! X
Thats very kind, thank you.
It's a 'me' issue for sure, I'll work on it lol"
I agree with the OP’s on that too (says me being told the same and doesn’t agree either!) x |
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"Noted! Someone else said about spacing paragraphs lol. You’re gorgeous and shouldn’t feel intimidated by anyone! X
Thats very kind, thank you.
It's a 'me' issue for sure, I'll work on it lol
I agree with the OP’s on that too (says me being told the same and doesn’t agree either!) x"
We are our own worst critics lol |
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By *ildSilkCouple 13 weeks ago
Nr Swansea |
"Genuine question and I want brutal answers, what is putting couples and women off us? Are we showing too much to the point it’s tasteless? We get winks and message people but don’t get a reply 🤣 or we message couples we feel like are a good match and no reply. We only message women who are interested in couples but none are interested in us 🤣 we’re very new to the world of swinging so give us some tips. Thank you x "
Hiya, we are not your target audience but we saw your profile previously mentioned people with body hair to keep scrolling so we knew we weren’t compatible as Mr has a hairy chest. We notice that’s gone from your profile now but sometimes it’s good to keep that type of thing in if you feel strongly about it. Good luck on your journey! Xxx |
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"I’ve completely changed our bio. We are really not up our own arse dick heads I promise you. Was just getting so many unwanted messages from older men I wanted to be blunt! We’re really nice people haha well I’d like to think we are anyway. Thank you x "
What a difference in the 2 profiles. The new 1 is warm , friendly and inviting , the original was a touch " dont bother messaging you got no chance " lol . I'm sure you'll see a huge improvement in responses now especially with the lovely pics , best of luck to you both xx |
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"No is it another swingers site? X "
It’s more of a kinkier version of Tinder but expensive subscription if you want to see your likes. But a mix of people who like both vanilla and non vanilla, as well as couples too. You also get more options for sexuality (I genuinely hadn’t heard of most of the options they have to list and had to Google them!) |
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Didn't see the original profile but the updated profile looks good to us.
If you are getting messages from people outside your age range, make sure you set your message filters. It took us a while to realise we needed to do it.
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By *ikesfun1Man 13 weeks ago
around and about |
I can’t imagine why anyone would not want to meet with you both , you are a fantastic looking couple and profile is very open and clear
Maybe worth attending some socials and events and building a rapport with people
I’m sure you will get plenty of fun soon |
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Only reason I (lou) wouldn't respond is because you both look gorgeous with perfect bodies and im the complete opposite- definitely a me issue but I think a lot of people feel the same about their own issues ! Definitely do some club nights and socials as you see other gorgeous people there too! |
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Fair play to you guys for asking and accepting some criticism, acknowledging and changing to suit your needs ,
Get yourselves to some social meets guys , interact and chat to like minded people with no expectations of play , you'll find some people who you will get friendly with and an enjoyable night out if nothing else ,
The amount of people ive got to know in all shapes and sizes , ages , race and gender I genuinely have the honor of calling a friend now is unreal ,
There are so many nice people in the scene who are looking for nothing more than acceptance from like minded people , they may not be your cup of tea and you can make that clear with no issue but you may get a good friendship out of it ,
The social scene is quite big or you can try events , and you also have the clubs , there's loads of people putting a variety of things on people with all sorts of interests or kinks and you'd mainly find these on the forum ,
Good luck and happy fabbing, Jay |
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"Genuine question and I want brutal answers, what is putting couples and women off us? Are we showing too much to the point it’s tasteless? We get winks and message people but don’t get a reply 🤣 or we message couples we feel like are a good match and no reply. We only message women who are interested in couples but none are interested in us 🤣 we’re very new to the world of swinging so give us some tips. Thank you x "
Out of age range only. Have had a good look at your pictures the first one especially is fabulous. |
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happy fabbing and enjoy yourselves 