I'm having a lovely chat on here to a really nice couple and it got me thinking back to an encounter I had ages ago.
How many people are on here possibly because they are lonely rather than lacking sex?
Maybe my wording is incorrect but I hope you get my drift  |
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"I think a lot of people are here because they are lonely, a lot is boredom browsing but I do think some people seek out people for a simple conversation as they have no one else. "
You're better with words than I am but that's exactly what I meant! |
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"I think a lot of people are here because they are lonely, a lot is boredom browsing but I do think some people seek out people for a simple conversation as they have no one else. "
I think you are correct, lots are here for lots of reasons, that disappoints others |
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"Both, truth be told.
I like the forum as I can read people’s voices and they can read mine. They get to hopefully see there’s a human behind the profile, and a feel for my personality."
And it's a lovely personality.
 |
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I am feeling called out with this thread.
I was just messaging a fab friend the other day to say that I'm not hugely interested in setting up more sex meets in the near future. Not when I really want is physical affection and a good conversation. |
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"I am feeling called out with this thread.
I was just messaging a fab friend the other day to say that I'm not hugely interested in setting up more sex meets in the near future. Not when I really want is physical affection and a good conversation."
You're not alone  I've recently come out of a relationship and have sort some comfort in conversations with people. |
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"I am feeling called out with this thread.
I was just messaging a fab friend the other day to say that I'm not hugely interested in setting up more sex meets in the near future. Not when I really want is physical affection and a good conversation."
There’s something really nice about just having a friend, (yes with benefits would be nice), but who you’re so comfortable with that you can just melt into each other’s arms while having just a nice intelligent conversation and intimacy.
I take a long time to rev up, so spontaneous stick it in there sex is out of the question as much as I’d want it to be otherwise, I’m truth I don’t think I was doing rutting and revolving door sex even in my prime- I just ended up chatting and massaging before I went in.
So for me a connection with her is important, and so is all the kissing, touching, stroking, massaging, foreplay and sensuality that builds up to the sex.
Some people do panda really well (eats roots, shoots and leaves). I just can’t.
I just love the chatting and enjoying the company of a lovely mind and personality of a sensual woman, I could lose myself for hours in that alone.
And now I’m rambling, sorry 
Having taken them all down, I really should get my arse in gear and put up a new set of profile pics up shouldn’t I !?! |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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I thought I would find other singletons that would like chatting and good conversation here but I was wrong.Sure it does happen but in the years I've been here only found it once. |
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"I'm having a lovely chat on here to a really nice couple and it got me thinking back to an encounter I had ages ago.
How many people are on here possibly because they are lonely rather than lacking
Maybe my wording is incorrect but I hope you get my drift "
Never lonely although sometimes bored. I come on fab for many reasons. I don't watch much television but i do enjoy looking at photos and reading the forums. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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I think I get your gist and maybe there are those that are lonely and want intimacy and connection rather than sex.
And I can certainly see that, like many others I've engaged with, I do miss the intimate connections I used to enjoy in a relationship.
And whilst I am on here looking for interaction and to meet like-minds that's more about finding my tribe which will alleviate some of any loneliness feelings I may have.
I came here looking for like-minded people and the possibility to explore a more adventurous sex-life. However, I don't find FAB a good place for any of that and will make more use of the clubs for the more meaningful connections.
I think this answer might just be more badly worded than you feared your original questions was OP, but I hope you get my rather rambling and confuzzled point.  |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I think a lot of people are on here are looking for intimacy and hope to find it through sex. "
I think this is very true.
It can be difficult to find intimacy with friends, especially for fellas, and intimacy is typically linked to sex through experience. Even though sex wasn't the purpose of the intimacy, a man's body often reacts and his partner might then desire to go to the next stage. However, the intimacy is then withdrawn if the partner doesn't want it to progress thinking that intimacy is the doorway to sex, when it actually isn't. Thus, reinforcing the thoughts that intimacy is inextricably linked to sex. |
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i love the forums which i'm on most evenings,i'm not to bothered about finding people for sex just be nice to chat to people male or female about anything they fancy chatting about i'm a friendly guy so i have no hidden agenda. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I am feeling called out with this thread.
I was just messaging a fab friend the other day to say that I'm not hugely interested in setting up more sex meets in the near future. Not when I really want is physical affection and a good conversation."
You'll be surprised how many men actually want the same... A couple of hours curled up on the sofa, lots of affection and close contact... And whilst our bodies will react, that doesn't mean that's what we're doing it for.
But, we don't get the chance because it's believed that when a man gets hard due to intimacy that was his intention all along...  |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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This is such a lovely thread and everyone has articulated their points really well.
I have the emotional connection with friends but I haven't found that in a sexual match in a really long time. I hope that I do find it again, because it's so important to have that when thinking about long term relationships. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I'm here out of loneliness. It's not often I talk to people in the real world. Spent all Christmas and new years alone. Dating apps don't work"
Oh! I'm sorry. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"Definitely because of loneliness,wouldn't be on the forums if my wife was still alive"
This must be very difficult. I'm sending hugs.
I'm wondering if there's something nearby with others who are in a similar position. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I'm here out of loneliness. It's not often I talk to people in the real world. Spent all Christmas and new years alone. Dating apps don't work"
It's the same for myself. I've even been told that I'm not good enough to have a convo with apparently. |
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By *man87Man 31 weeks ago
sittingbourne |
"I am feeling called out with this thread.
I was just messaging a fab friend the other day to say that I'm not hugely interested in setting up more sex meets in the near future. Not when I really want is physical affection and a good conversation.
You'll be surprised how many men actually want the same... A couple of hours curled up on the sofa, lots of affection and close contact... And whilst our bodies will react, that doesn't mean that's what we're doing it for.
But, we don't get the chance because it's believed that when a man gets hard due to intimacy that was his intention all along... "
Couldn't agree more its not just bout sex although sex is great being intimate cuddled up pillow talking engaging in decent convo is what a lot of men want but they feel they have to portray something different on this site id love to meet a long term partner who's into this scene although I don't go hunting it as it is a swingers site and what will be will be but alot of men including myself thrive for intimacy but won't admit it x |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I'm here out of loneliness. It's not often I talk to people in the real world. Spent all Christmas and new years alone. Dating apps don't work
It's the same for myself. I've even been told that I'm not good enough to have a convo with apparently."
That is unkind and unnecessary. |
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To all of you who are feeling lonely.... you're not alone, we may only be people on a screen but behind every screen is a real person that will read your comment and even for a brief moment will be thinking of you.
Stay strong, things do get better. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"To all of you who are feeling lonely.... you're not alone, we may only be people on a screen but behind every screen is a real person that will read your comment and even for a brief moment will be thinking of you.
Stay strong, things do get better."
This is so sweet and very true!! |
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Unfortunately, sometimes, but being on here, you never alone, are most importantly, try to enjoy your own company. Life is too short.
I would say forget New Year new me. Just enjoy the moment. I think it’s far more important to enjoy the connections and journey than the destination. |
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By *man87Man 31 weeks ago
sittingbourne |
"To all of you who are feeling lonely.... you're not alone, we may only be people on a screen but behind every screen is a real person that will read your comment and even for a brief moment will be thinking of you.
Stay strong, things do get better.
This is so sweet and very true!!"
I'm local to you if you ever need a chat or socialise know one deserves to feel lonely x |
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"I think a lot of people are on here are looking for intimacy and hope to find it through sex.
I think this is very true.
It can be difficult to find intimacy with friends, especially for fellas, and intimacy is typically linked to sex through experience. Even though sex wasn't the purpose of the intimacy, a man's body often reacts and his partner might then desire to go to the next stage. However, the intimacy is then withdrawn if the partner doesn't want it to progress thinking that intimacy is the doorway to sex, when it actually isn't. Thus, reinforcing the thoughts that intimacy is inextricably linked to sex."
Personally I feel it's a mistake to seek emotional intimacy via casual sex. Physical intimacy is different obviously. |
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Lost my partner in September, Christmas just hasn't been the same this year, spent all Christmas and new year indoors, not seen anyone, don't think I'll ever get over it, it's nice to post an occasional message on here and feel a part of something. |
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"Lost my partner in September, Christmas just hasn't been the same this year, spent all Christmas and new year indoors, not seen anyone, don't think I'll ever get over it, it's nice to post an occasional message on here and feel a part of something."
Mate take it from me,I lost my wife over 2yrs ago you don't stop missing them,but it does get easier.
If you ever want a chat I'm more than happy to chat with you x |
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"Lost my partner in September, Christmas just hasn't been the same this year, spent all Christmas and new year indoors, not seen anyone, don't think I'll ever get over it, it's nice to post an occasional message on here and feel a part of something.
Mate take it from me,I lost my wife over 2yrs ago you don't stop missing them,but it does get easier.
If you ever want a chat I'm more than happy to chat with you x"
Thanks I appreciate that  |
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"I'm having a lovely chat on here to a really nice couple and it got me thinking back to an encounter I had ages ago.
How many people are on here possibly because they are lonely rather than lacking sex?
Maybe my wording is incorrect but I hope you get my drift "
I do get lonely and have turned men down who just want to cum n go or suck n go.
I’m a man who likes to be sensual, to cuddle, to kiss, to build something regular.
Finding a real cuddle buddy for company, chat is very difficult where I live. |
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By *ooBulMan 30 weeks ago
SNottingham |
Op, some people marry because they can't stand the thought of being alone for the rest of their life.... So, i'm not surprised by anything.
I would only want to be with someone if they made me a better person!
At the end of the day we are social creatures & isolation can take a toll on someones mental health. COVID taught us all that lesson.
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Yes.
Even though I stipulate fwb, people lie and pretend to get the sex.
After trying a few months, my wall goes back up and I give up trying.
I don't want a full blown relationship but at least stay for a cup of tea after you've zipped up, and maybe a chat. |
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"Personally I feel it's a mistake to seek emotional intimacy via casual sex. Physical intimacy is different obviously. "
Absolutely, and I think there's a place and a need for both, and you're absolutely right in saying that problems arise when one is confused with or for the other.
It's been just over a year since I lost my partner, There isn't a day I don't miss her, but all the crying in the world isn't going to bring her back.
All the while she was ill I never strayed, I owed her that in order to show my commitment and to keep a promise made.
Yes, I want to have sex, lots of it, I've so much catching up to do. I'm still human, have a pulse, desires, wants and needs.
I don't wan't a relationship where we're picking out curtains, certainly not, but I probably like many on this thread also want to find a fwb who I can just be intimate with and have a giggle with and just hold once in a while.
As lovely lady in the post above said, sometimes it's more than just zipping up and buggering off - and there are those times when time just flies because you're doing nothing more than making someone feel wanted. |
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Simply putting it, I think there are quite few who are seeking to fill the empty void, with a chemistry of conversation and not all about physical endorsements… also making a connection with someone who is on the same wave … but to be bluntly honest, I think there’s also a fair few who are damaged from previous relationships and encounters |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
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I'm not lonely but am a lot more sexually adventurous than most of my RL friends so I come on here and persue the forums for validation that I'm not just a shameful hussy. On here I'm just one of many ppl open to experimenting and pushing boundaries so it feels good to have a sexy tribe online even if I never meet them face to face |
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Yes, absolutely. Pretty sad life here unfortunately, but lucky enough to have a few FWBs via here who I can really talk to as well as have sex. But I keep putting out because you can't have too many FWBs |
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By (user no longer on site) 23 weeks ago
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I am one of lifes loners and a recluse but I don't consider myself lonely.
When the working day is over, I've have enough of people at work that I don't seek people out of work.
You learn to live without the sex so that's a non issue and after many years not having sex is the 'norm'.
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By (user no longer on site) 23 weeks ago
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As humans we want companionship regardless of saying "can't think of anything worse!" But we do - we seek it so it's more than likely loneliness with a sprinkle of boredom for most.
I'm bored more than lonely plus I like meeting new people from all walks of life. I'm very sociable too but just like a variety of people to converse with. |
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