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Why *shouldn't* someone meet you?
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"I'm actually an international spy, and once the deed is done I'll peel my fake face off and flee in the night. You'll wake up to latex nightmares, and never know who you bonked."
Sounds like a cracking night 🤓 |
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By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
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"I meaow along to songs when I don't know the words. It's embarrassing for those around me.
On that note, I sing to the dog but change the lyrics to include his name. That’s us out then.
L"
Yeah......
I do that to the cat, too 😳 |
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"I meaow along to songs when I don't know the words. It's embarrassing for those around me.
On that note, I sing to the dog but change the lyrics to include his name. That’s us out then.
L
Yeah......
I do that to the cat, too 😳"
Set up a choir? |
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By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
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"I meaow along to songs when I don't know the words. It's embarrassing for those around me.
On that note, I sing to the dog but change the lyrics to include his name. That’s us out then.
L
Yeah......
I do that to the cat, too 😳
Set up a choir? "
You're on 🐈 🐕 🎵 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
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"I'm actually a figment of their imagination. Awkward. "
To be fair, that would make meeting you *less* awkward as it's hard to mess up a conversation with a figment of your imagination. |
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By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
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Ok…
Hold tight…
I’m constantly walking around naked
The more sex I have the more I want
I need very little sleep
I’m hard work
I drink too much tea
Forget to eat, get hangry then eat alllll the food
Have the spatial and social awareness of a Labrador puppy
Have the humour of a 13 year old boy
Snort laugh a lot
Dance like an electrocuted hobbit
Sing to myself constantly- then realise actually it’s not to myself
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP 24 weeks ago
|
"Ok…
Hold tight…
I’m constantly walking around naked
The more sex I have the more I want
I need very little sleep
I’m hard work
I drink too much tea
Forget to eat, get hangry then eat alllll the food
Have the spatial and social awareness of a Labrador puppy
Have the humour of a 13 year old boy
Snort laugh a lot
Dance like an electrocuted hobbit
Sing to myself constantly- then realise actually it’s not to myself
"
I don't feel as though you have quite understood the question. |
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"Ok…
Hold tight…
I’m constantly walking around naked
The more sex I have the more I want
I need very little sleep
I’m hard work
I drink too much tea
Forget to eat, get hangry then eat alllll the food
Have the spatial and social awareness of a Labrador puppy
Have the humour of a 13 year old boy
Snort laugh a lot
Dance like an electrocuted hobbit
Sing to myself constantly- then realise actually it’s not to myself
"
And you are an enemy of gravity.
 |
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"Ok…
Hold tight…
I’m constantly walking around naked
The more sex I have the more I want
I need very little sleep
I’m hard work
I drink too much tea
Forget to eat, get hangry then eat alllll the food
Have the spatial and social awareness of a Labrador puppy
Have the humour of a 13 year old boy
Snort laugh a lot
Dance like an electrocuted hobbit
Sing to myself constantly- then realise actually it’s not to myself
"
What a catch 😘🤓 |
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My true identity is Sidney University. Since you all put a stop to me stealing your photo’s I have to collect them in person. It’s time consuming but it pays expenses and I get the occasional blow job. |
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By (user no longer on site) 24 weeks ago
|
"Ok…
Hold tight…
I’m constantly walking around naked
The more sex I have the more I want
I need very little sleep
I’m hard work
I drink too much tea
Forget to eat, get hangry then eat alllll the food
Have the spatial and social awareness of a Labrador puppy
Have the humour of a 13 year old boy
Snort laugh a lot
Dance like an electrocuted hobbit
Sing to myself constantly- then realise actually it’s not to myself
"
You sound like me. 
Two of me in a room? Hell for everyone else |
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Because I don't accommodate overnight, I need loads of foreplay rather than just 3 pumps, "thank you, Ma'am" and I can't be arsed to dress seductively. I also prefer 1st meet to be in a club, when I'm already there. |
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"I'm actually an international spy, and once the deed is done I'll peel my fake face off and flee in the night. You'll wake up to latex nightmares, and never know who you bonked."
I'm sure we have met before, the same thing happened to me.
I have a knack for sleeping with other secret or not so secret agents at the bureau. |
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Your pets will become sick or die and your aging parents will suddenly take to their death beds ... within the day you are due to meet me..as of yet I haven't managed to harness the Voodoo powers to make potential meets cars break down...but I'm working on it..😸 |
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Ps this is not a kink. Please don't message me.
