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The Circle of Fab Friends/Friendships.
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I suspect that many of us on Fab have acquired an array of friends, lovers, paramours and connections.
I hold all of mine in equal regard. However there are subsets in which they fall into: those with whom I can confide in and therefore know pretty much everything about each another.
And then there are those who are on a deeper level of connection from a physical and emotional perspective. Lastly there are those who are less 'granular' and we co-exist for the laughs, the socials and some 'less intensive' fun.
Through natural attrition my friendships sometimes evolve or erode between levels of closeness, familiarity, bonding or unexpected estrangement (for whatever reason).
Are you the same? Is there a natural order and level of friendship that has developed over time? |
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My very best friend is someone I first met through fab and have no secrets from.
I trust her with all of me and the feeling is mutual.
No-one else comes close.
I rarely if ever chat to anyone else on my fab friends list which is in single digits anyway.
We may exchange the odd message now and again but I know virtually nothing about them or them of me.
I have 2 other very close friends, one male and one female, both of whom I met through fab but they are no longer on the site for various reasons. I trust them implicitly and am very grateful for their trust in me. |
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"I suspect that many of us on Fab have acquired an array of friends, lovers, paramours and connections.
I hold all of mine in equal regard. However there are subsets in which they fall into: those with whom I can confide in and therefore know pretty much everything about each another.
And then there are those who are on a deeper level of connection from a physical and emotional perspective. Lastly there are those who are less 'granular' and we co-exist for the laughs, the socials and some 'less intensive' fun.
Through natural attrition my friendships sometimes evolve or erode between levels of closeness, familiarity, bonding or unexpected estrangement (for whatever reason).
Are you the same? Is there a natural order and level of friendship that has developed over time?"
I have one person on my friends list and that's the way it'll stay until they remove themselves |
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By (user no longer on site) 16 weeks ago
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I don’t have many on here, more acquaintances than outright friends. Those I’ve spoken to, still do but others I haven’t heard from in a long time.
Most though, I will keep friendly and not confide anything personal. |
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Oh, wow, that’s such an interesting way to look at friendships and connections! It’s like having a buffet of relationships, right? You’ve got your favourites, the ones you go back to all the time, but then there are those spicy little numbers that add some more excitement, too!
I totally get what you’re saying about having different levels of connection. It’s super normal to have those friends you can spill your guts to, and then there are the ones you just enjoy hanging out with for a good laugh. Sometimes you just need a buddy to chill with and share some fun times without diving deep into the heavy stuff we’ve all probably experienced then all in FAB at some time or another.
It’s also totally true that friendships evolve it just happens! Life rolls on, paths change, and sometimes people just drift apart, and that’s okay.
I love that you hold all your connections in equal regard—that’s such a great mindset! But I think it’s natural for those connections to wax and wane depending on what’s going on in everyone’s lives. You might find new FWBs that just click better at certain moments or rekindle an old friendship during a nostalgic trip down memory lane.
It’s all part of the journey, right? So, let’s just keep enjoying the ride! Who knows what kind of crazy adventures and connections await! |
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I've been here 9 years and this is my fourth profile.
Each time I have left and returned I have never once made contact with someone I've met on a previous profile. I've always started with a clean slate so any previous friends or contacts are no longer within that circle.
In the almost 6 years since this profile was created, only 3 people have progressed beyond the social stage and I haven't spoken to 2 of those in 5 years.
It takes a lot for me to call someone a friend but I have found in my time here than some people base their level of friendship on friend lists and fab friendship for them is very shallow.
For that reason I can't say I have accumulated friends or lovers because they never overlap and for the majority of my time here it has been one at a time until one or other of us moves on. |
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"My very best friend is someone I first met through fab and have no secrets from.
I trust her with all of me and the feeling is mutual.
No-one else comes close.
I rarely if ever chat to anyone else on my fab friends list which is in single digits anyway.
We may exchange the odd message now and again but I know virtually nothing about them or them of me.
I have 2 other very close friends, one male and one female, both of whom I met through fab but they are no longer on the site for various reasons. I trust them implicitly and am very grateful for their trust in me. "
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You seem to have a fine pedigree of close friends. Thank you for sharing. 🤍 |
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We have a great friendship circle, closer with some more than others... I'd say most people we socialise with wether that be in "vanilla every day life" or on the scene we have met them through fab, we have regular games nights, meals out, nights out out... scene club nights, we're off to a festival in the summer.... and as a couple we met through a 90's social amongst mutual fab friends. I wouldn't want that to change either, we are a very social pair and love it. 😊
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I have some very close friends on here, we have shared confidences and trust each other with details of our personal lives. These are some truly special people and in proper fab style - they know who they are (at least they'd better!)
I have some friends that are perhaps not quite so close but we enjoy each others company and conversation and they know some real stuff about me. Then there are those who are fun to chat with but it's not that deep.
I pull back a lot from friendships where it feels like there is a one-sided attraction because I don't want to lead anyone on. |
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By (user no longer on site) 16 weeks ago
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I used to. Not so much now
Why?
Honestly and maybe super cynically I am not sure that I’ve ever met anyone that sincere that I trust them with things real friends would reveal, far too many chats happen off here
There is one that we just get on really well together and that’s a great start |
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By *eliWoman 16 weeks ago
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Yes, I suppose there is. I have quite a few friendships with varying degrees of closeness, affection and mindful time spent. Some are "hi, bye" friends. Those I see at socials, have a brief catch up with, might engage on the forums and it's pleasant but nothing more to it. I like being social, find people endlessly fascinating.
Then there are those I'm closer to. We talk with more frequency, on a greater range of subjects. Perhaps see each other outside socials. Some I'm more intimate with.
And then my closest friends. I'm intimate with a couple. I've known some for many years, others less time but it's easy with them. I can fully be myself. They can be them. Talk about so much. Not have to talk daily - when we do it's like no time has passed. That's not to say we always agree. Of course not. I'm a bit of a throbber, they can be a bit twunty - I still love them.
I'm very lucky to have the friendships that I do, really. |
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By *elloWoman 16 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
I would love to have a friendship circle which began on fab and spills over into real life whether that includes sexual activities or not but just being able to spend time with others within the lifestyle in 'normal places' unfortunately I am not someone who finds making friends easy,  |
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I think I've struggled with friendship here. There are some that I'd consider as light friendships.
The intense friendships have veered into sexual territory though and sometimes sex complicates things
I had a friendship with a couple but I feel like it has run its course and it makes me immensely sad. |
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"I don’t have many on here, more acquaintances than outright friends. Those I’ve spoken to, still do but others I haven’t heard from in a long time.
Most though, I will keep friendly and not confide anything personal. "
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I think Fab is but a facet for some people on here and that's not necessarily a bad thing. ☮️ |
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I am lucky to have a trusted circle of fab friends, we have shared some intimate details about our lives and I trust them completely.
There are others that I'm fond of, but we don't have a deep connection and so we just dip in and out of our lives. |
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"Oh, wow, that’s such an interesting way to look at friendships and connections! It’s like having a buffet of relationships, right? You’ve got your favourites, the ones you go back to all the time, but then there are those spicy little numbers that add some more excitement, too!
I totally get what you’re saying about having different levels of connection. It’s super normal to have those friends you can spill your guts to, and then there are the ones you just enjoy hanging out with for a good laugh. Sometimes you just need a buddy to chill with and share some fun times without diving deep into the heavy stuff we’ve all probably experienced then all in FAB at some time or another.
It’s also totally true that friendships evolve it just happens! Life rolls on, paths change, and sometimes people just drift apart, and that’s okay.
I love that you hold all your connections in equal regard—that’s such a great mindset! But I think it’s natural for those connections to wax and wane depending on what’s going on in everyone’s lives. You might find new FWBs that just click better at certain moments or rekindle an old friendship during a nostalgic trip down memory lane.
It’s all part of the journey, right? So, let’s just keep enjoying the ride! Who knows what kind of crazy adventures and connections await! "
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🩶🤍 |
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By *B..Woman 16 weeks ago
Wiltshire |
From my time on here I have met a handful of people that I would class as friends, majority no longer use the site but out of those there are 3 true friends that know everything about me and I trust them simplicity, there are others I chat shit to on here and that’s fun enough for me |
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There are friends I've met in the swing world who are now such a part of my life I can't imagine a time when I was without them and I think they will always be my friends, regardless of where we met. Maybe even best friends.
There are lovers who I met through fab who I now don't talk to at all.
Relationships change over time, but also some are just different than others. It's not a case of fab friends vs "real" friends for me but rather a hierarchy of how much someone brings to my life in any situation. |
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I have made some great friends through Fab.
As a previous poster said, you start from a place of openness, without many of society’s imposed hang ups.
Some friendships are intense, others more occasional, but I value them all.
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All my friends are a mixture of those that I trust completely and have met in real life or people that I have talk to over the years and just never got the chance to meet as yet due to other commitments.
I would say they know everything there is to know about me really, not sure if that's a good thing or not at times  |
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I’ve made some very close friends over the years who’ve helped me through some really tough times. I can trust them with my life. I think with fab it brings open minded genuine people, on the whole. |
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"We have a great friendship circle, closer with some more than others... I'd say most people we socialise with wether that be in "vanilla every day life" or on the scene we have met them through fab, we have regular games nights, meals out, nights out out... scene club nights, we're off to a festival in the summer.... and as a couple we met through a 90's social amongst mutual fab friends. I wouldn't want that to change either, we are a very social pair and love it. 😊"
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This is a delight to read. You have really embraced your nexus of friends and become absolute social butterflies. 🦋 |
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This is my second time here. A few people that knew me as a single have approached for a catch up which has been nice.
First time round I made some amazing friends some of whom I’ve never met in person and some I have, the friendships formed have been as valuable as those formed outside of here, and are still very good friends.
Will things be the same this time round? Who knows, |
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I don't have friends on here. Initially I tried - I tried for a couple of years but eventually I had to accept I'm just not a good fit and it wasn't going to happen.
Thankfully in my real life I have enough close friends and mates and acquaintances that I don't feel the loss too much. |
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We’d love to add to our circle of friends, AJ has a large group of her own from when she was a unicorn 🦄
Bit it would be lovely to make some new ones together and hopefully we can attend a social or two in the future as there’s quite a few o the forums we’d love to meet |
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Some years ago I made a conscious decision to distance myself from the friends I have. They are all still there, and they are all wonderful, but I’m not close in the way I used to be. On Fab, we know a few lovely people, but we are not that close. I could try to be, but I have trust issues - stemming from events out there in the real world - and it makes me reluctant to engage too deeply. I’m getting better, but real closeness is still a ways off. For Ailsa, her life is so frantic she doesn’t have the space for anything else. This might change for her later this year, and I’m hoping it does. She’s earned the right to some free time, fun and frolics. And we would probably both benefit from being a little closer to others Xx |
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By *sWyldWoman 16 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
Friendships, those made here or otherwise constantly evolve as life does.
I hope that people know I care and will always be a call or message away should they need me ,even if we aren't in constant communication.
When it comes to Fab, you have to accept that people want to meet others, and as such energy shifts.
That's ok too .I get excited when my friends do and I hope they feel the same for me , however it doesn't diminish or devalue our own connection.
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"I have some very close friends on here, we have shared confidences and trust each other with details of our personal lives. These are some truly special people and in proper fab style - they know who they are (at least they'd better!)
I have some friends that are perhaps not quite so close but we enjoy each others company and conversation and they know some real stuff about me. Then there are those who are fun to chat with but it's not that deep.
I pull back a lot from friendships where it feels like there is a one-sided attraction because I don't want to lead anyone on. "
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I can appreciate that reciprocity is a key element to establishing and maintaining attraction, to some extent. I appreciate your insight. 🩷 |
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By *bi HaiveMan 16 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"We have a great friendship circle, closer with some more than others... I'd say most people we socialise with wether that be in "vanilla every day life" or on the scene we have met them through fab, we have regular games nights, meals out, nights out out... scene club nights, we're off to a festival in the summer.... and as a couple we met through a 90's social amongst mutual fab friends. I wouldn't want that to change either, we are a very social pair and love it. 😊
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This is a delight to read. You have really embraced your nexus of friends and become absolute social butterflies. 🦋"
I'm probably more of a social moth tbh Nero. She's the butterfly.  
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