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I demand to be entertained

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London

as I'm very ill and missing out on our Mother's Day day out.

Stuck on the sofa wearing my sunglasses over my reading glasses; headache, sore, snotty nose I can barely breathe out of; body aches, and a wet cough.

Do something to take my mind off it.

Please

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan 10 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff

I'll go put my Gladiator costume on...

"Are you not entertained?"

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands

Do you play any multiplayer online games? Could run a few games to take your mind off the illness.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman 10 weeks ago

little house on the praire

Go and answer my questions thread

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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago

If we come in bringing a tray of drinks, trip over and fall in a heap .. that might distract you, although possibly not in a good way

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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago

Charges in, does a quick Truffle Shuffle, legs it back out.

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I'll go put my Gladiator costume on...

"Are you not entertained?""

Are you wearing undies?

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"Do you play any multiplayer online games? Could run a few games to take your mind off the illness. "

I don't, just Angry Birds, Diggy's Adventure and some one player games.

My head aches too much to focus on the screen.

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan 10 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff


"I'll go put my Gladiator costume on...

"Are you not entertained?"

Are you wearing undies?"

Viewers Choice...

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I'll go put my Gladiator costume on...

"Are you not entertained?"

Are you wearing undies?

Viewers Choice..."

You have a cute, heart-shaped bottie. I'm going with no undies.

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By *issilia AmoriWoman 10 weeks ago

St Albans/ North Welsh Borders

I can sing you a song if you like

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By *anforfun2020Man 10 weeks ago

stockport

Drop me a message il gladly help xx

About to hop in shower soon if you want to watch me soap up xx

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By *ools and the brainCouple 10 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

I'll Pop round and juggle kittens for you whilst riding a unicycle naked, then spoon feed you pudding after whilst sporting a massive erection.

If that helps

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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago


"as I'm very ill and missing out on our Mother's Day day out.

Stuck on the sofa wearing my sunglasses over my reading glasses; headache, sore, snotty nose I can barely breathe out of; body aches, and a wet cough.

Do something to take my mind off it.

Please "

Would you like me to send you a video doing the helicopter with my cock 🤪

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan 10 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff


"I'll go put my Gladiator costume on...

"Are you not entertained?"

Are you wearing undies?

Viewers Choice...

You have a cute, heart-shaped bottie. I'm going with no undies."

I've had some compliments in my time, but that's now a frontrunner for my epitaph! 🥰

They're coming off!! 🩳

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By *ggdrasil66Man 10 weeks ago

Saltdean


"as I'm very ill and missing out on our Mother's Day day out.

Stuck on the sofa wearing my sunglasses over my reading glasses; headache, sore, snotty nose I can barely breathe out of; body aches, and a wet cough.

Do something to take my mind off it.

Please "

I take it a fuck is out of the question?

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By *dam1971Man 10 weeks ago

Bedford

Read my status update to cheer yourself up.

If you’re still feeling gloomy, imagine what a twat I am to have found it funny. There’s always someone worse off than yourself.

Hope you’re on the mend soon.

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By *exxyyDy11Man 10 weeks ago

North West

For fuck sake. Beat me to the Gladiator thing.

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By *olden PoleMan 10 weeks ago

Bromley

You know the Bond film Live and Let Die…..the Caribbean geeza that scuttles in like a human spider - can do that for you.

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"You know the Bond film Live and Let Die…..the Caribbean geeza that scuttles in like a human spider - can do that for you."

I don't remember that. It sounds a bit scary, to be honest

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London

I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

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By *evotee101Woman 10 weeks ago

Houghton le Spring

Get Well soon 🍇🍫☕️💐

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"Get Well soon 🍇🍫☕️💐"

Thank you.

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By *olden PoleMan 10 weeks ago

Bromley


"You know the Bond film Live and Let Die…..the Caribbean geeza that scuttles in like a human spider - can do that for you.

I don't remember that. It sounds a bit scary, to be honest "

Check it out whilst you’re suffering. It’s entertaining enough as he starts swing he’s bollocks to and throw.

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭"

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

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By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan 10 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭"

Cwtches from the Welsh end XXX

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain. "

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"You know the Bond film Live and Let Die…..the Caribbean geeza that scuttles in like a human spider - can do that for you.

I don't remember that. It sounds a bit scary, to be honest

Check it out whilst you’re suffering. It’s entertaining enough as he starts swing he’s bollocks to and throw."

Found it but it's too dark to make anything out

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag."

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to"

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

"

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 10 weeks ago

Herts/MK/London/Leeds


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!"

I’m a coffee drinker but this does sound delicious

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

I’m a coffee drinker but this does sound delicious "

I've been told I make an excellent cup of tea, more than happy to share the wonders of Indian tea to those that are interested!

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!"

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland "

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk. "

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now "

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found "

I have to have low fodmap milk which I've only found in litre cartons. I end up throwing most of it away as no one else will use it and I don't drink enough tea to use it before it goes off.

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found

I have to have low fodmap milk which I've only found in litre cartons. I end up throwing most of it away as no one else will use it and I don't drink enough tea to use it before it goes off."

Sounds like a tragic love story - you, a lonely pint of milk and a race against time. There's always the solution of drinking more tea though, what else would you pair with biscuits and toast!

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found

I have to have low fodmap milk which I've only found in litre cartons. I end up throwing most of it away as no one else will use it and I don't drink enough tea to use it before it goes off.

Sounds like a tragic love story - you, a lonely pint of milk and a race against time. There's always the solution of drinking more tea though, what else would you pair with biscuits and toast!"

More tea means more trips to the loo, especially in the night.

I have old lady bladder problems.

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By *wertyjk01Man 10 weeks ago

NW London/Kent/Midlands


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found

I have to have low fodmap milk which I've only found in litre cartons. I end up throwing most of it away as no one else will use it and I don't drink enough tea to use it before it goes off.

Sounds like a tragic love story - you, a lonely pint of milk and a race against time. There's always the solution of drinking more tea though, what else would you pair with biscuits and toast!

More tea means more trips to the loo, especially in the night.

I have old lady bladder problems.

"

Think it's time to accept that sleep is just a sacrifice we make for good cups of tea.

Or maybe it’s time to start experimenting with new milkshake combinations, turn that tragic milk story into a masterpiece!

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By *op22Man 10 weeks ago

sheffield

how about a relaxing massage

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"I took a turn for the worse earlier, my friends.

I'm afraid the virus cells have reached my throat and bronchi.

I need a big big cuddle 😭

Hope you're better soon, I just recovered from the flu that's going around.

Found that masala tea actually helped to calm my throat, could help the pain.

I'm a bit funny where tea is concerned. I've been trying force myself to make a lemon black tea, but the thought of anything but Tetley with milk makes me gag.

Quite fussy with my tea as well, if I can be bothered to stand there for 15 mins I'll make Indian tea the more traditional way, otherwise a biscuit brew or PG tips with milk is my go to

Is that where you boil the tea with the milk in, on the stove?

Yeah so you boil some water with some spices and flavourings for a while until the smell is right, then what I do is put in a teabag of choice, others get tea leaves and do it that way, and then boil that more, then add some milk, a metric crap tonne of sugar and then froth it all up. Served best with a custard cream or two!

A friend made me some once. It was nice but wasn't very tea-like for me. I like my tea bland

Bland isn't a word in my vocabulary!

Also tea should be full of flavour and bits of biscuits that have broke off after too long of a dunk.

I really fancy a cup of tea and biscuit selection now

Cup of tea and a biscuit solves 99% of all problems I've found

I have to have low fodmap milk which I've only found in litre cartons. I end up throwing most of it away as no one else will use it and I don't drink enough tea to use it before it goes off.

Sounds like a tragic love story - you, a lonely pint of milk and a race against time. There's always the solution of drinking more tea though, what else would you pair with biscuits and toast!

More tea means more trips to the loo, especially in the night.

I have old lady bladder problems.

Think it's time to accept that sleep is just a sacrifice we make for good cups of tea.

Or maybe it’s time to start experimenting with new milkshake combinations, turn that tragic milk story into a masterpiece!"

Unfortunately, I can only have a small amount of the milk, even low fodmap ones.

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"how about a relaxing massage"

And who would be giving me that, pray tell?

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By *op22Man 10 weeks ago

sheffield

that would be myself

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By *ad Nanna OP   Woman 10 weeks ago

East London


"that would be myself

"

How long are your arms?

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By *op22Man 10 weeks ago

sheffield

long enough to make you forget your ill

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By *aveyougotmymarblesMan 10 weeks ago

3rd rock from the sun

I demand to be called broomfondle

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