FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you ever feel ignored.
Do you ever feel ignored.
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On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life. |
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"Absolutely and I couldn’t care less…..I’m just happily posting away to distract myself from doing my work anyhow xx 😄"
Do what makes you happy I say. Participate in whatever makes you happy on the site and the forums. |
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"I do yeah mate, so you're not the only one. In fact the other day I was bypassed twice on those what would you do to the user above games. It is what it is though."
Sometimes I think this is genuinely mistakes like two people typing at the same time and then by the time it’s posted there’s another above! |
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life. "
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games. |
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"I do yeah mate, so you're not the only one. In fact the other day I was bypassed twice on those what would you do to the user above games. It is what it is though.
Sometimes I think this is genuinely mistakes like two people typing at the same time and then by the time it’s posted there’s another above!"
Yeah you're probably right. Or maybe some horny guys want to bypass another guy to get to the woman or couple above 😂 |
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"Absolutely and I couldn’t care less…..I’m just happily posting away to distract myself from doing my work anyhow xx 😄
Do what makes you happy I say. Participate in whatever makes you happy on the site and the forums. "
Exactly that……xx |
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I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
In general I don't care though. If I write something I assume it's read by anyone that's interested in the thread and I don't write for replies.
If there's a love in happening between a group of familiar forum users I'm not going to bother joining.
Nor am I going to say something nice about the poster above only to have the next poster skip me because he's a guy too.
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I avoid threads, especially when you see the first few posters as you know it's going to end up as a conversation between just them......yet funny how "being inclusive" is banded about frequently on the forum x
I drop a comment in some topics then usually forget it x |
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It used to really frustrate me when I wouldn't get a reply on my solo account (mr).
You'd read a profile and think you were a perfect match but no reply.
Now I just don't send messages.....im no less successful this way and its better for my ego. Lol |
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Yeah sometimes, but I persevere because I'm annoying and will continue to post my opinion on threads whether people want me to or not 
I don't take the "what would you do to the person above" etc threads seriously at all. I normally post nonsexual nonsense.
And like others have said, people can type at the same time and accidentally miss people. I have done it before and it's purely accidental. |
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It used to bother me but not for a long time now.
I don't usually take part in forum games but it's pretty obvious when certain people skip back up the thread to respond to one of their buddies rather than play the game as intended.
When I first started using the forums I commented here in the lounge fairly regularly for more than a year before anyone acknowledged my existence.
If it hadn't been for a more positive experience in the Irish forum I would have given up using them. |
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these games of like or dislike are designed to put people dpwn and normally started by popular ''look at me ''types so if you get involved you run the risk of being regected and same for anyother post those who post very regular tend to do ok..
im not here for the forums im here to find fun and swing so these forums mean very little and i totally avoid the silly games that should be moved to the games part of the forums..
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
In general I don't care though. If I write something I assume it's read by anyone that's interested in the thread and I don't write for replies.
If there's a love in happening between a group of familiar forum users I'm not going to bother joining.
Nor am I going to say something nice about the poster above only to have the next poster skip me because he's a guy too.
"
I passed on a woman in one of those threads once because I didn't like her forum persona and her snidey remarks.
It wasn't accidental or done for effect. Just me making a point that the forums aren't always an echo chamber.
I got messages afterwards from other women telling me I would be blacklisted and ignored in the forums.
The power of one little four letter word.
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I don't use the would you wouldn't you , who would you , what would you threads for a few reasons. One of those reasons is that Johnny doesn't read the threads, he looks for someone that gives him a semi and has a little flirt.
Jenny , doesn't really read all the posts she just posts something lurid that she knows will attract response and imagine the number of replies = her popularity.
Joe Public just reads the original Q .... by passes everyone and responds at the bottom happily avoiding reading all the shite posted previously.
To be fair O.P. you are a bloke and the blokes won't be trying to get into your good books...... or your kecks , so you will only get replies from the few women who aren't sitting there passively waiting for adoration to make them think they've got 'it' |
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By (user no longer on site) 5 weeks ago
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I try to post something about the immediate poster above, whether it's another man or whoever, lately.
Sometimes if I start a more serious thread it can gain traction.
Or it can slowly linger and fade into darkness without a single response.
(Like the one I did that's dissappearing at the bottom of the lounge thread...) |
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"Yeah sometimes, but I persevere because I'm annoying and will continue to post my opinion on threads whether people want me to or not
I don't take the "what would you do to the person above" etc threads seriously at all. I normally post nonsexual nonsense.
And like others have said, people can type at the same time and accidentally miss people. I have done it before and it's purely accidental. "
I know that I have said this to you before on a thread but I certainly would look twice and three times at you  |
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"When everyone but you gets a reply it's a bit disheartening, and I wonder why. Only because I like them, or they're a friend. So yeah, I have felt invisible. But, it's fiiine! 🤷♀️"
Oh in games, no... Doesn't bother me 🤣 Reading comp. isn't the one for me today. 🤦♀️ |
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life.
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games. "
In the 2-3 times I participated in this kind of threads, I’ve got one or two “Aviatrix- my mate says…” and I very much suspect the game organiser was making up the message for me, so I had one and I didn’t feel shit about being left out. So cute. 💌
I am definitely no forum attraction material but likewise, I am not looking to meet people off the forum really so it doesn’t matter to me. Hence I don’t participate any more. Always the same 10 people recycling themselves. 🥱 |
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7 people have added to the thread while I was typing my last post......
My last post is now piss in the wind and won't be read or replied to
Will I take it personally - no.
The only way it would be read is if someone reads the whole thread and wants to agree or disagree or FAF me |
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I've made up answers to questions I've never been asked in the ask in private threads.
I've probably asked 40-50 questions on those over the years and only about half of them have been answered.
Less than half of those again have not asked a question in return so I just write some random rubbish.
There are lots of people taking part in threads who have no intention of actually taking part in them. They say they are in and then sit back and wait on others to do the hard work.
During lockdown I did an experiment where I winked and fabbed every single woman and couple on two separate winkathon and fabathon threads.
From memory that was about 40 different profiles.
I didn't get a single wink or fab in return. |
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"7 people have added to the thread while I was typing my last post......
My last post is now piss in the wind and won't be read or replied to
Will I take it personally - no.
The only way it would be read is if someone reads the whole thread and wants to agree or disagree or FAF me"
I wrote my post thinking maybe this is one where Granny will notice me.
Alas... |
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By *eliWoman 5 weeks ago
. |
"
I don't use the would you wouldn't you , who would you , what would you threads for a few reasons. One of those reasons is that Johnny doesn't read the threads, he looks for someone that gives him a semi and has a little flirt.
Jenny , doesn't really read all the posts she just posts something lurid that she knows will attract response and imagine the number of replies = her popularity.
Joe Public just reads the original Q .... by passes everyone and responds at the bottom happily avoiding reading all the shite posted previously.
To be fair O.P. you are a bloke and the blokes won't be trying to get into your good books...... or your kecks , so you will only get replies from the few women who aren't sitting there passively waiting for adoration to make them think they've got 'it' "
And then you get the Anns who aren't actually interested in each other but they've realised it's a way to get male attention. Like good little females.
I've never taken part in the fabathon/winkathon. Very very rarely take part in the user above thread unless it's something nonsensical.
I don't feel left out as such OP; no one person on this site gets a reply everytime they post. I do think I might be more likely to get a reply but that's on me having a vagina, not because I'm something special.
I have an active irritation of people who say "I'm in" and then get upset when no one messages them. Have they messaged anyone? More than likely - no.
If you're wanting interaction like the game threads, you sadly have to accept that the ratio of men to women means there's a likelihood you'll be passed over in the bid to catch a woman's eye.
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life.
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games.
In the 2-3 times I participated in this kind of threads, I’ve got one or two “Aviatrix- my mate says…” and I very much suspect the game organiser was making up the message for me, so I had one and I didn’t feel shit about being left out. So cute. 💌
I am definitely no forum attraction material but likewise, I am not looking to meet people off the forum really so it doesn’t matter to me. Hence I don’t participate any more. Always the same 10 people recycling themselves. 🥱 "
I do know some OP's of these kind of threads do do that for the reason you've stated |
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No. But that's due to my longevity and acclimatisation in this place.
I do empathise for those who do feel that way - in particular when it comes to forum games/challenges where the 'rule' is to make reference to the person above. I know it sounds like a minor thing (and it probably is) but newcomers can often feel left out when a seasoned forum-dweller blatantly keeps skipping over them to focus on the object of their desires with servitude and sycophancy, thus negating the whole point of the game: inclusivity and, sometimes, male solidarity.
Also, to my mild amusement, men who only and exclusively reference the women on their threads, ignoring other men who - ironically - are the ones keeping the thread alive for the OP. |
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life.
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games.
In the 2-3 times I participated in this kind of threads, I’ve got one or two “Aviatrix- my mate says…” and I very much suspect the game organiser was making up the message for me, so I had one and I didn’t feel shit about being left out. So cute. 💌
I am definitely no forum attraction material but likewise, I am not looking to meet people off the forum really so it doesn’t matter to me. Hence I don’t participate any more. Always the same 10 people recycling themselves. 🥱
I do know some OP's of these kind of threads do do that for the reason you've stated "
Which is nice and kind and adds to the so-called forum inclusivity (which is everything but, really! 😂) but really, no need to keep things artificial for my sake. The forum isn’t my hunting ground so to speak. It’s never been, I just use it to fight boredom and compile cool music playlists. |
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life.
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games.
In the 2-3 times I participated in this kind of threads, I’ve got one or two “Aviatrix- my mate says…” and I very much suspect the game organiser was making up the message for me, so I had one and I didn’t feel shit about being left out. So cute. 💌
I am definitely no forum attraction material but likewise, I am not looking to meet people off the forum really so it doesn’t matter to me. Hence I don’t participate any more. Always the same 10 people recycling themselves. 🥱 "
Yeah. That’s the game. But I still play along. It’s funny sending silly messages. Also like, who knows, my love, maybe the ones that fancy us will join the forums soon |
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"On any thread about attraction or about what they want to do to you or anything like that I am always ignored or left out. Except once and I remember saying to myself- all these messages must be coming from the same one person it was so weird. But yeah I do.
But what can I do? Cry about being ugly? I’ve got shit to do in my life.
I mean the ‘my mate fancies you’ games and ‘oooft’ and ‘send a message to who you fancy’ games.
In the 2-3 times I participated in this kind of threads, I’ve got one or two “Aviatrix- my mate says…” and I very much suspect the game organiser was making up the message for me, so I had one and I didn’t feel shit about being left out. So cute. 💌
I am definitely no forum attraction material but likewise, I am not looking to meet people off the forum really so it doesn’t matter to me. Hence I don’t participate any more. Always the same 10 people recycling themselves. 🥱
I do know some OP's of these kind of threads do do that for the reason you've stated
Which is nice and kind and adds to the so-called forum inclusivity (which is everything but, really! 😂) but really, no need to keep things artificial for my sake. The forum isn’t my hunting ground so to speak. It’s never been, I just use it to fight boredom and compile cool music playlists. "
Me too, I think 99.9% of my meet ups have been with non forum people. |
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I sometime clock that I've been overlooked or passed over on a thread.
I am unperturbed.
I live by the motto "you don't have to like me, and I don't have to care".
It keeps stuff from here in proportion. |
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It's the way of the forums. Most of the time I'm absolutely fine with it, sometimes it smarts a little if I'm already feeling sensitive.
I'm often far busier as postie and sender than receiving messages. Sigh. 🤣
The 'poster above' threads are irritating and I'll only very rarely join in. |
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People do that all the time. I used to try and correct it somehow but it is what it is. It certainly does not bother me but if I can I will always try and include everyone unless I don't notice as can be absent minded sometimes  |
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I still play in those games but I set my expectations fairly low. I figure the people that get more attention are the people who are fairly sociable and outgoing and I am not that person. I keep to myself and I comment on stuff but I'm sure I go by unnoticed. So I figure that I don't get sexy anonymous messages is about right. |
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂"
•
Not me. I swipe right for practically every man (in addition to women et al) to the breaking point that newbies and those unaccustomed presume I'm gay.
I get in-threads remarks from men telling me they're only into women (so am I) to private messages from men reinforcing their sexual persuasions.
I only do it for one reason: inclusivity, variety and diversity. |
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
•
Not me. I swipe right for practically every man (in addition to women et al) to the breaking point that newbies and those unaccustomed presume I'm gay.
I get in-threads remarks from men telling me they're only into women (so am I) to private messages from men reinforcing their sexual persuasions.
I only do it for one reason: inclusivity, variety and diversity."
I’ll swipe either way on gents but try to make either reply at least humorous |
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
•
Not me. I swipe right for practically every man (in addition to women et al) to the breaking point that newbies and those unaccustomed presume I'm gay.
I get in-threads remarks from men telling me they're only into women (so am I) to private messages from men reinforcing their sexual persuasions.
I only do it for one reason: inclusivity, variety and diversity."
I'm still down for drinks and chess though just saying, I suck at chess. |
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
•
Not me. I swipe right for practically every man (in addition to women et al) to the breaking point that newbies and those unaccustomed presume I'm gay.
I get in-threads remarks from men telling me they're only into women (so am I) to private messages from men reinforcing their sexual persuasions.
I only do it for one reason: inclusivity, variety and diversity.
I'm still down for drinks and chess
though just saying, I suck at chess."
•
As long as you suck it's fine. |
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"Can't say I'm overly bothered, I know full well that my gender and age are against me. I'm more likely to be irritated by those that hijack someones post to fawn over each other. "
God you're gorgeous |
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"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?"
Only time it ever bothered me was when I started a game thread (another round of battlenips) and it got zero comments... broke my heart! 🤣🤣 |
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"7 people have added to the thread while I was typing my last post......
My last post is now piss in the wind and won't be read or replied to
Will I take it personally - no.
The only way it would be read is if someone reads the whole thread and wants to agree or disagree or FAF me
I wrote my post thinking maybe this is one where Granny will notice me.
Alas..."
I always notice you. |
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By *aizyWoman 5 weeks ago
west midlands |
"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?
Only time it ever bothered me was when I started a game thread (another round of battlenips) and it got zero comments... broke my heart! 🤣🤣"
I like battlenips, mainly because I won! 👑 |
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Gloucester
I don’t take part in the ego boost threads as being someone who mainly just reads and rarely contributes, I know I’m not who they want to join in.
I’ll comment if I’ve got an opinion about whatever it is and so I’m not bothered if no one responds to what I say.
There’s an element of playground nonsense about it all that’s quite easy to see through |
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I don't participate in them, but it is usually the same men flirting with the same women and vice versa, it's so obvious, and yes, a lot of people seem to get left out or skipped over for this reason |
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"Bring passed over in a forum game on a niche website doesn't bother us no.
Getting in a miff because "cuminurwifenow69" quoted the couple above us isn't really what we would do "
I wouldn't go confusing popularity with verbosity |
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"I like the swipe left or right threads where every guy swipes right on every woman and every guy gets swiped left on by every other guy. 😂
•
Not me. I swipe right for practically every man (in addition to women et al) to the breaking point that newbies and those unaccustomed presume I'm gay.
I get in-threads remarks from men telling me they're only into women (so am I) to private messages from men reinforcing their sexual persuasions.
I only do it for one reason: inclusivity, variety and diversity."
Oh I know Nero. I've seen you do it many times. You have inspired me too do the same and I have done so on occasion. I even wrote your name in my post but then decided not to single you out that you may speak for yourself
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"Occasionally. But you know, it's just fab ...and the likelihood of me meeting even 0.5% of users must be incredible odds"
•
My goodness Míddèrs, what madness is this?! It's not just Fab, it's THE Fab, the one and only, the celebrated and fêted Fab, the Fab that one trawls the airwaves to find, the one where bad men with good hearts scour the hinterland and tundra to locate the good women with bad souls, where errant Knights † embark on a quest to find their true loves, the Fab of all Fabs, the nirvana, the Shangri-la... ...
... ...the hopeful few that attain your ∅.5% and the chance to charm and beguile your quivering quim and tame your dangerous derrière.
"just fab" indeed. {shakes fist}
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"I don't usually join in them because I don't like feeling passed over for the person they fancy. Self preservation.
This. It was one of my earliest lessons of The Fab Forum.
"
Good job someone fancies you. I won't be the only one 🔥🤓 |
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By *og-ManMan 5 weeks ago
somewhere |
I'm dyslexic and try to take care of my spelling if possible.
Because of this I take a little bit of time in replying and usually end up telling some big hairy man that he's gorgeous and what I'd love to do to him.
Instead of the sexy woman 4 posts back in the thread |
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"I'm dyslexic and try to take care of my spelling if possible.
Because of this I take a little bit of time in replying and usually end up telling some big hairy man that he's gorgeous and what I'd love to do to him.
Instead of the sexy woman 4 posts back in the thread "
This really did make me laugh. Thank you. But also funny at the time I assume. |
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By *og-ManMan 5 weeks ago
somewhere |
"I'm dyslexic and try to take care of my spelling if possible.
Because of this I take a little bit of time in replying and usually end up telling some big hairy man that he's gorgeous and what I'd love to do to him.
Instead of the sexy woman 4 posts back in the thread
This really did make me laugh. Thank you. But also funny at the time I assume. "
It is yes....they're used to me in the Irish forum |
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"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?"
Occasionally but I try not to let it bother me x |
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"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?"
Sorry, did someone say something? |
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"Yes just now on my own thread. Nobody was getting me a coctail so I got one myself😭"
Happened to me the the other day when i posted a drinks request in the 'what are you having' type one.
I foolishly thought that as it was pretty inane and non -flirty i might get welcomed (it was a long Saturday..). Of course i didn't get an acknowledgement.
Quite, er, dispiriting.
And then i remembered that 'Oh, yeah, it's Fab'.
Never forget it's a misnomer.
Still. Some of the pictures, videos, and occasionally the profile texts prove pleasantly distracting. |
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I don't let it bother me, I mean nobody owes you a reply but it does grate when I post something and everyone else gets acknowledged but me. Usually from the same people who spout 'it's friendly' 'We're inclusive' which again is a daft thing to say because people can only post from their own experiences and perceptions....And as this thread shows that peoples experiences differ....Empathy if you will, I feel sometimes the forum lacks it.
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"Often
A lack of response doesn't mean your contribution has gone unnoticed though
It may have been useful to someone or made them smile
Not everyone who reads contributes"
This. Way more people read than post. |
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"Often
A lack of response doesn't mean your contribution has gone unnoticed though
It may have been useful to someone or made them smile
Not everyone who reads contributes"
I rarely get a direct response to things I post but every time there is a thread about noticing people or what you think of other fabbers, I get messages from women I've never spoken to, including some I've never seen on the forums saying how they really like my forum approach and they enjoy what I have to say.
That makes it all worthwhile. |
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"Can't say I'm overly bothered, I know full well that my gender and age are against me. I'm more likely to be irritated by those that hijack someones post to fawn over each other.
God you're gorgeous "
naughty, naughty lol |
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By *ost SockMan 5 weeks ago
West Wales and Cardiff |
People tend gravitate towards and interact with others they know. Real life is the same.
I’ve been to quite a lot of Fab events and it’s the same as non-Fab ones - I walk in and, for all my good intentions, see the people I know and inevitably get drawn into that world.
I don’t think it’s a deliberate attempt to exclude often; it’s just the way things tend to operate. I also think that we’ve all probably been perceived by others as being part of, or operating, a clique on occasions. We’d be shocked if we knew, as we had no intention to be that way.
There’s probably people out there who perceive the “anti-clique” threads as being a bit cliquey .
Messageboards are particularly difficult - you can drive yourself bonkers trying to figure out what works and what doesn’t. I’ve posted remarkable/insightful/hilarious/revelatory stuff - nothing; posted some old nonsense - loads of engagement .
That’s kinda the online world in a nutshell . |
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"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?"
Yeah occasionally but I'm not for everyone and vice versa so whatever |
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"Question to all.
Do you ever feel ignored, passed over in the forum games.
Feel like you are invisible.
I've been here long enough for it not to bother me, but how does it make you feel?"
“I've been here long enough for it not to bother me”
^i copy and pasted yours.  |
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Yes, definitely, but I don’t generally take it personally.
Sometimes it’s because the game is quick moving and it’s just look at the draw. Other times it’s because the next poster is taking the opportunity to post about someone they fancy rather than sticking to the spirit of the gameand that’s on them, not us. |
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Yeah, I have in the past but then I've sort of realised that it's because I've essentially been posting in my own little bubble without really interacting with others. I find when I actually reply to others and start that conversation, it's easier to not feel that ignored. |
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"All the time, and to be honest it’s why I don’t bother anymore. But, it’s the forums and should not be taken seriously! "
That’s quite disappointing though isn’t it, more and more of us don’t take it seriously, and what happens then?
Maybe this is why so many great people like jokes on here?
Just a thought.
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"I do yeah mate, so you're not the only one. In fact the other day I was bypassed twice on those what would you do to the user above games. It is what it is though.
Sometimes I think this is genuinely mistakes like two people typing at the same time and then by the time it’s posted there’s another above!"
i would agree with this as i always seem to get the timing wrong lol |
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