FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What have you learned from being in this site ?
What have you learned from being in this site ?
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Soooo much
1. First lots about each other in the exploration we have had
2. How many couples are not couples
3. That pressured meets do not work
4. That despite this being a swingers site people are very judgmental
5. Men are frightened of saying they are bi curious
6. Loads of men think you’ll meet after two messages
7. Guys think women love cock pictures
8. Couples dont show enough of the guy
9. The site seems not to act on reported members
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"Soooo much
1. First lots about each other in the exploration we have had
2. How many couples are not couples
3. That pressured meets do not work
4. That despite this being a swingers site people are very judgmental
5. Men are frightened of saying they are bi curious
6. Loads of men think you’ll meet after two messages
7. Guys think women love cock pictures
8. Couples dont show enough of the guy
9. The site seems not to act on reported members
"
Very true |
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By *lowupdollTV/TS 11 weeks ago
Herts/Beds/Leeds/London |
And a few things I really didn’t expect but learned on here (and maybe it’s just about here):
There is more prejudice about bi men than gay men.
Straight men (I’ll include straight and fab straight) are actually easier to talk to than gay men. Mostly.
Labels and categories aren’t really all that. They’re less restricting than people think they are.
There is, behind all the boobs, dicks, lamppost pissing and flaming a lot of kindness out there too. |
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People are rarely, in person, that which they make themselves out to be online.
Trust no one until they have proven themselves trustworthy.
Never compromise your standards or lower your expectations. There was a reason why you set them in the first place. |
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Through Fab?
I learned where my 'no' is. That is I learned where my boundaries are and tried enough things that I don't feel fomo anymore.
I learned I'm not poly and that I have no interest in pursuing sex with couples.
I learned I'm not bothered about club's or parties and that I really enjoy day time social events in nice bars or cafes.
I learned that two women in my life is plenty and if there is friendship it's a blessing.
I have, incredibly, learned that I don't need women in my life at all. Nothing surprised me more than this. I am single, not looking and happy. |
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I have learned that amongst a lot of the negativity around this place and success rates etc, there are some really good, genuine, and sexy people on here.
I have also learned that if i was in a couple, I am not sure how willing I would be to share a partner.
Clubs can be great, or garbage - it can depend on the night you go and the event being held. I have had some good club nights though.
That older or younger have equal to offer  |
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"Soooo much
1. First lots about each other in the exploration we have had
2. How many couples are not couples
3. That pressured meets do not work
4. That despite this being a swingers site people are very judgmental
5. Men are frightened of saying they are bi curious
6. Loads of men think you’ll meet after two messages
7. Guys think women love cock pictures
8. Couples dont show enough of the guy
9. The site seems not to act on reported members
"
All of this apart from 5). |
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That every single day on the forum
A guy will post a new thread being like
"I'm completely over this site..
Why do I not get any meets"
And a woman will post a thread being like
"What's the problem with all these men?" |
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Everyone is different
People do have biases
There are lot of nice people around
There are some not so nice people around
There are some seriously sad people around
Know when to zip it and avoid the agents provocateur
There is a totally new lingo I had no idea about that rapidly learning
Lots of people like cake
.
.
.
Apparently my bum is not that bad
|
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"Everyone is different
People do have biases
There are lot of nice people around
There are some not so nice people around
There are some seriously sad people around
Know when to zip it and avoid the agents provocateur
There is a totally new lingo I had no idea about that rapidly learning
Lots of people like cake
.
.
.
Apparently my bum is not that bad
"
Ice cream 🍦 is better ☺️ |
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That there are very few lines folk won't cross.
Fewer still if there's sex offered.
People would sell out their values in a heartbeat for sex.
Nothing is sacred and there are no boundaries. Nothing.
The things people will describe and brag about on here is a sad reflection of humanity.
Nothing surprises me on here.
It's depressing if you pay too much attention to it.
All the whinging and whining and ranting is a serious mood hoover.
It's why I do my own thing and swerve the rest. Life is short. Have to live it well and choose to be happy 🫶🫡 |
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"That those with integrity, authenticity and empathy rarely reaches double figures on here.
·
The hot ones do. Just be patient, Nero.
•
They have to be fit though, innit."
Ah bruv.. please tell me you're watching the current season of Taskmaster with Fatiha El-Ghorri. Everything she says end with innit or bruv - she's class! |
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"That those with integrity, authenticity and empathy rarely reaches double figures on here.
·
The hot ones do. Just be patient, Nero.
•
They have to be fit though, innit.
·
Ah bruv.. please tell me you're watching the current season of Taskmaster with Fatiha El-Ghorri. Everything she says end with innit or bruv - she's class!"
•
It's not my usual vernacular. 
I've never watched Taskmaster - I know I really should, seeing that JoeBeans is an avid fan. I've never heard of "Fatiha El-Ghorri" either. 🙂 |
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Honestly,
My cock is entirely average
Men have learned the use of a wide angle lens
Some single men are real tools
More women are nasty than I thought. (But most are still lovely and maybe the ones that aren't only aren't because of some of the tools)
I'm not such a big pervert as I thought I was
I really am unshockable
I need to get over my fear of large social situations with strangers |
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That I like it here.
Never Google anything you read in the forum… even though I always do.
That there are some genuinely lovely people who I’ve made great friends with.
That I’m incredibly selective with who I spend my time with. |
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By *C79Man 11 weeks ago
Caterham |
More confirmation than learning. My appeal in the swinging world is basically the same as outside.
I'm a dime-a-dozen middle age white guy with average everything so I blend into the "of no real interest" category for 99% of people I cross paths with. Saying that, there have been some exceptions to that statement & I'm grateful for those. |
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By *rRiosMan 11 weeks ago
dublin |
"Straight men (I’ll include straight and fab straight) are actually easier to talk to than gay men. Mostly. "
I find this quite interesting and turns my assumption upside down. Is it a guarded thing or an elitist thing or something else entirely? |
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"That those with integrity, authenticity and empathy rarely reaches double figures on here.
·
The hot ones do. Just be patient, Nero.
•
They have to be fit though, innit.
·
Ah bruv.. please tell me you're watching the current season of Taskmaster with Fatiha El-Ghorri. Everything she says end with innit or bruv - she's class!
•
It's not my usual vernacular.
"
Oh I've been observing.. I'm well aware  |
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"Not everyone tells the truth
^^^^^^^ This
& Also trust nobody 🤭 & always always video call before a meet to make sure they are who they say they are, too many Cat-Fish everywhere, Fact"
If they won’t video call it usually means they won’t show up for a meet they planned. Some people just want the chat and pictures  x |
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"Not everyone tells the truth
^^^^^^^ This
& Also trust nobody 🤭 & always always video call before a meet to make sure they are who they say they are, too many Cat-Fish everywhere, Fact
If they won’t video call it usually means they won’t show up for a meet they planned. Some people just want the chat and pictures x"
Or they’re just not who they’re claiming to be |
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"Not everyone tells the truth
^^^^^^^ This
& Also trust nobody 🤭 & always always video call before a meet to make sure they are who they say they are, too many Cat-Fish everywhere, Fact
If they won’t video call it usually means they won’t show up for a meet they planned. Some people just want the chat and pictures x"
Yes this is very true !! |
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It's definitely a woman's world out there, battling against a 1000 hornys guys to get a message through or replied too is tough, but I really enjoy the site and reading profiles that have similar ideas to mine is validity I'm not a freak! |
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1) it’s ok to be sexual and there’s other women who enjoy sex as much as me!
2) I feel the art of seduction and lust is lost when two or more people are behind keyboards x
3) never trust an account until proven otherwise, sadly lots of fakes x |
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Well, what I've learned is that it doesn't get better than fab for meeting like minded people. Of course you've got idiots, but it shouldn't take anyone too long to figure out when they are dealing with one of life's inadequates or under achievers, and then treat them accordingly. Thank you, "Legs" for pointing me in this direction many, many years ago |
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I have learned in my 10 years being on this site a valuable amount off lessons/experiences and self reflection...
Mainly to be more reserved around people, when I first joined I noticed I was more a happy go lucky kind off guy and willing to engage or talk more with people as was with my nature..
Be it on the forums or chat rooms etc or when visiting swingers clubs when I used to go there...
With age and experience I slowly over time noticed peoples real nature or true side surface from behind their masks and I don’t mean one particular group or gender etc etc I mean people in general overall and began picking up on these tell tale sign more and more..
Overtime I gradually began withdrawing more and talking less with people due to then more questioning and looking at peoples motives overall..
I get and acknowledge that I have my own issues or things to work on and always will but these days on here I’m more like a ghost who observes..
If I get along with someone I’ll engage and talk etc but I have learned keep the group off people you are in touch with small and simple..
Everyone else keep at an arms length be civil and not go around causing problems with them but at the same time being wary off others and keeping a distance…
Which is a shame personally for me but that is life 
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It’s a marathon not a sprint
A lot of the profiles that fit what I’m looking for are so far away geographically
Self-righteousness is rife on here
Plenty of attached “single” women
Couples where the woman is clearly used as sex bait
I’m very photogenic
There are some great people here just that it takes time to find & get to know them |
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